Ch. 6: Not so sweet child of mine
A little stroking of my micro e-penis is always appreciated.
[Social]
"It's ten minutes until the bell rings for gym. Mrs. Black (otherwise known as Orca) can be such a pain with her calisthenics. Everyone is going to the mall after school, and the last thing you want to do is sweat like a horse. No one will go near you. Imagine taking your shoes off in the shoe store and knocking out everyone in the place? Gross! This is going to take some quick thinking.
Select a mood :
-HONEST
-CREATIVE
Select an action :
-GO TO GYM CLASS
-TRY TO AVOID GOING TO GYM CLASS"
Who doesn't think gym class sucks ass?
-CREATIVE
-TRY TO AVOID GOING TO GYM CLASS
"You think of several excuses, but illnesses and injuries seem to be the most likely ways to get out of going to gym class. You approach Mrs. Black with a look of (false) pain and woe that she has seen a million times before. "Whatsamatter with you?" she says, menacingly.
Select an action :
-TELL HER THAT YOU HAVE AN INJURY
-TELL HER THAT YOU ARE HAVING YOUR PERIOD AND YOU DON'T FEEL WELL
-TELL HER THE TRUTH"
Would have preferred an option involving explosives. Telling a fib will have to do.
-TELL HER THAT YOU ARE HAVING YOUR PERIOD AND YOU DON'T FEEL WELL
"What's the matter with you, young lady? Don't you know that vigorous exercise is one of the best ways to get rid of those monthly cramps? Go over there and do fifty squat thrusts. You'll sweat the pain right out of you."
Next>>
[Family]
"You are in one of your "ultra-cool" moods. While cruising through the house, you bump your foot on a piece of furniture and let a swear word sneak out. Your mother calls you in from the other room. She says, "Did you say what I THOUGHT you said?"
Select a mood :
-TRUTHFUL
-LESS THAN TRUTHFUL
-TOO COOL TO CARE
Select an action :
-TELL HER YOU DID AND APOLOGIZE
-TELL HER YOU DIDN'T
-TELL HER YOU DID AND SO WHAT"
Swearing is a part of free speech.
-TOO COOL TO CARE
-TELL HER YOU DID AND SO WHAT
""SO WHAT?" she says. Her eyes seem to glow for awhile, then she gets frighteningly calm. She speaks almost in a whisper. "So what?" she says, softly, "I'll have to remember that phrase when you ask me to drive you somewhere, or buy you a new blouse, or cook you dinner." The list extends well into the twilight of the evening. "
TL;DL
Next>>
[Family]
"The family dog has been acting a little peculiar lately and no one can figure out why. Some of your fellow family members suggest that maybe he should be given away, or worse, put to sleep. Dad delivers an ultimatum.
The dog must shape up or ship out. You are the only one in the house who can take the responsibility for getting him back into shape.
Select a mood :
-FEEL LIKE TAKING ON THE RESPONSIBILITY
-DON'T FEEL LIKE TAKING ON THE RESPONSIBILITY
Select an action :
-TRAIN THE DOG
-DON'T TRAIN THE DOG"
The dog's the only good conversation we get in this house-hold.
-FEEL LIKE TAKING ON THE RESPONSIBILITY
-TRAIN THE DOG
"You spend every available minute keeping an eye on the dog, rewarding him for good behavior and keeping him out of trouble. One day, when you return home from school, you smell what can only be the dog's "by-products" (number 2 to be specific). The smell is emanating from your parents' bedroom.
You enter the bedroom to find the dog sleeping peacefully in the corner and a "sculpture" sitting squarely atop Dad's favorite pillow. Fortunately, no one is home. You can:
Select an action :
-DISPOSE OF THE PILLOW AND PLAY DUMB LATER
-TRY TO WASH THE PILLOW
-DISPOSE OF THE PILLOW AND ADMIT THE TRUTH"
Foolish mutt has jeopardized everything we've worked for!
-TRY TO WASH THE PILLOW
"You scrape the sculpture off the pillow and throw it away outside the house. The pillow and pillow case are left with a large brown (and smelly) ring. After three machine washings (your mother keeps yelling "What are you DOING down there?") the smell comes out of the pillow case, but the pillow still has the stain.
Not only that, the pillow now weighs thirty pounds because it is water-logged. It will never be dry by the time Dad gets home. What will you do?
Select an action :
-ASK FOR MOM'S HELP
-TELL DAD THE STORY"
Must form an alliance with the old woman if we are to save this situation.
-ASK FOR MOM'S HELP
"She is very sympathetic. As it turns out, Dad couldn't tell his "favorite" pillow from a pile of bricks. She makes a quick substitution and all is well. "
And much like Trixie or Gilda, the dog was never heard of ever again.
Next>>
[Social]
"You and your friends have all gone to the shore for a beach party. It's late at night. One of your friends has a suggestion. He says, "Let's go skinnydipping."
Select a mood :
-SHY
-UNINHIBITED
Select an action :
-TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF
-WAIT FOR EVERYONE ELSE TO TAKE THEIR CLOTHES OFF
-KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON"
I'm a little apprehensive about exposing our proud greasy unwashed hide to water.
-SHY
-KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON
"Like most daring fantasies that come up during adolescence, everyone has big ideas, but few follow through on them. Several people actually go skinnydipping, but almost everyone keeps his or her clothes on."
Next>>
"A little while later...
On the back of a cereal box, you see a contest to name the cartoon character that represents the cereal. You enter and...
because you are very bright and very creative, you win!
Your prize package consists of a full five-years' supply of Crunchy Marshmallow Chewie O's!"
I'm glad that they agreed with the name "Wayne King".
This must be some kind of weird random event.
Next>>
Hmm, our coffer's running dry due to thoughtless spending. Time to take action.
A couple of extra options are available to us now we are in adolescence. They are: school, relationships, work and risks
[Work]
"You are too young to take on the responsibilities of a job just yet. Concentrate on your schoolwork."
Bugger.
Next>>
[Social]
"A couple of your friends have convinced someone to purchase a bottle of very cheap wine. They are excited about the idea of getting drunk. You are in the basement of a friend's house.
Select a mood :
-EXCITED
-AFRAID
Select an action :
-SHARE THE WINE
-WALK AWAY
-ACT LIKE YOU ARE DRINKING THE WINE, BUT DON'T"
TIME TO GET DRUNK, BROS. OLOLOLOL.
-EXCITED
-SHARE THE WINE
"There is one 12-ounce bottle of wine to be distributed among 15 girls. You take a few sips. What do you feel?
Select a mood :
-DRUNK
-PERFECTLY NORMAL"
A few sips of wine? I need half a litre of vodka to get me going. And I mean without a mixer.
-PERFECTLY NORMAL
"Of course you feel perfectly normal. Not even a young child could get tipsy on two sips of wine.
But a kid like you can get caught drinking when Marissa's mother spies on you, and reports back to your mother. You are grounded for a month."
Moral-fag scum!
Next>>
[Social]
"You are listening to the radio, and you hear that the guest disc jockey is... (Get ready because you will absolutely DROP DEAD from the shock, which is more than one human can possibly bear.)
Adam Bombe, of the famous Adam Bombe and The Nuclear Wastes. The show is accepting call-in questions and comments. The callers can win autographed albums, money and expensive prizes.
Select a mood :
-INTERESTED
-NOT INTERESTED
Select an action :
-CALL THE SHOW
-DO NOT CALL THE SHOW"
Holy shit, this guy sounds like one seriously prestigious gentleman. Would be a crying shame if we passed up the opportunity to say something sycophantic and creepy to him.
-INTERESTED
-CALL THE SHOW
"You get a busy signal.
Select an action :
-KEEP CALLING
-FORGET ABOUT IT"
We shall never surrender!
-KEEP CALLING
"You are greeted by the voice of the regular disc jockey who says, "Hi! Howareyatoday? We'rehere with ADAM BOMBE. Doyawannaaskima QUESTION, or doyawanna have a crack at one of our valuable prizes?"
Select an action :
-ASK HIM A QUESTION
-TRY FOR A PRIZE"
Screw the prize in the ass 'til it's dead. Enlightenment before material gain.
-ASK HIM A QUESTION
"Your heart is pounding a thousand miles an hour. When you hang up the phone, you can neither remember the question, nor the answer. One thing you DO remember is that Adam said you sounded older and very beautiful on the phone. He said you have a SEXY telephone voice. Could you scream? "
Truly the Chris Avellone of his day.
Next>>
[Emotional]
"A group of kids you hardly know have just made fun of you. Usually, this might not bother you, but lately you have been feeling down in the dumps about a lot of things.
Your physical appearance has been disappointing you, your family has been giving you a hard time about almost everything; and no one seems to be saying or doing anything positive toward you. You have a bad case of the blues.
Select a mood :
-DEPRESSED/SAD
-SUICIDAL
-FEELING JUST FINE
Select an action :
-TALK TO SOMEONE
-GET DRUNK OR STONED
-LET IT PASS"
Like that's anything to feel bad about.
-FEELING JUST FINE
-GET DRUNK OR STONED
"You have chosen an infantile way of dealing with your stress. Instead of experiencing the depression and dealing with it, you have chosen to wash it away by chemically altering your frame of mind. This method brings you relief, but it sets you into a pattern that can lead to alcohol or drug addiction."
Next>>
"A little while later...
When you open the refrigerator, you spot a beautiful pie (your favorite), with a single, triangular wedge cut neatly out of it. You know that if you eat a slice, you will be out of control and never fit into your jeans for tonight's date.
Because you have the self-control necessary to resist the treat, you avoid the consequences. Social sphere goes up, and so does Confidence."
If you are wondering what would have happened if we ate the pie, the following instructional video should give you a good idea:
Next>>
[Social]
"A friend of yours at school has gotten pregnant and has decided to get married. The whole town is buzzing about it as if it were an awful scandal. Your mother has been gossiping about it night and day with her nosey friends.
Every once in a while she tells someone on the phone, "If that were MY daughter, I'd lock her up until she was 25 before I ever let her out on a date again." Your friend is frightened and embarrassed.
One day you receive a phone call from your friend. She tells you that her boyfriend will be quitting high school and going to work full-time. They will be married in three weeks. She wants to know whether you would consider being a bridesmaid at her wedding.
Select a mood :
-FLATTERED
-EMBARRASSED
Select an action :
-AGREE TO BE HER BRIDESMAID
-DECLINE THE INVITATION"
Don't see a reason not.
-FLATTERED
-AGREE TO BE HER BRIDESMAID
"As it turns out, the wedding is small, but touching. Your friend is in her mother's wedding dress, which seems too large and much too long. As you watch her walk down the aisle, you couldn't possibly imagine trading places with her.
The groom looks terrified. His father rests a strong hand on his shoulder throughout the ceremony. As you eye the people who are attending, you see some people crying tears of happiness and others shaking their heads and gossiping.
Later in the day, you overhear a woman say, "If that were my daughter I would die." FIVE minutes later she tells your friend's mother "how beautiful and mature" her daughter looked. Sometimes adults seem so two-faced, it can make you sick! "
*Wipes tear from eye* Its just like that shot-gun wedding I had in Fallout 2.
Next>>
[Family]
"Early in the evening, a friend's mother appears mysteriously at the door and asks to speak to your mother. From another room, you hear the woman say that you have been a bad influence on her daughter and that your mother should try harder to "raise you 'the right way.'"
Her complaints, by the way, are totally unjustified. First, you barely know her daughter, and second, she is the biggest tramp in town, without your help or anyone else's.
Select a mood :
-FURIOUS
-GUILTY
-CALM
Select an action :
-GIVE THIS WOMAN A PIECE OF YOUR MIND
-WAIT UNTIL SHE LEAVES, THEN HAVE A TALK WITH MOM
-DO NOTHING"
-FURIOUS
-GIVE THIS WOMAN A PIECE OF YOUR MIND
"I can understand why you are angry, but giving the woman a piece of your mind proves her point to her. Here you are storming in from another room and acting rude in front of company! You tried to convince the wrong person of your innocence. For better success, you should have concentrated on your mom. "
Why can't we do both.
Next>>
[Social]
"Right before you go out on a big date, you lean your hand against a wall and, SNAP, you break your fingernail. There is a tube of Lock-Bond Glue All in the drawer.
Select a mood :
-SELF-CONSCIOUS
-NOT SELF-CONSCIOUS
Select an action :
-GLUE THE NAIL
-FILE THE NAIL DOWN AND FORGET IT"
-NOT SELF-CONSCIOUS
-FILE THE NAIL DOWN AND FORGET IT
"You are not going to let a little nail ruin your whole evening. This is a great attitude. Your date comments on how beautiful you are and never even notices. "
Yeah. I mean, when I'm whacking off to porn, I usually ain't concentrating on fingernails.
Next>>
"A little while later...
An all-boys school has asked for one member of your class to be a guest exchange student there for a month. Just think -- ONE WHOLE MONTH IN A SCHOOL THAT IS NOTHING BUT WALL-TO-WALL GUYS!!! Gym class will never be better. Students are reviewed for consideration. The principal has your name in front of him.
You have the right intellectual capabilities....
Socially, you are sophisticated enough...
Finally, your Emotional sphere shows you can control your impulses. Congratulations! You're going!"
We're going to be at the epicenter of a hurricane of dicks?
HOORAY!!!
Next>>
[Family]
"Your dad's boss thinks that you are a fine young woman. He would be honored if you would consider attending the company dinner with his son, Matt.
Select a mood :
-SUSPICIOUS
-INTERESTED
-UNINTERESTED
Select an action :
-ACCEPT THE INVITATION
-MAKE AN EXCUSE
-TELL HIM THAT YOU'LL GET BACK TO HIM"
Wait, he wants his son to go with someone like us?
-SUSPICIOUS
-TELL HIM THAT YOU'LL GET BACK TO HIM
"You must really hate your father. The boss' face becomes red. He takes a handful of high blood pressure medication (hey, just like Dad says). When he calms down, he promises that you will never have a job in his company.
Not only have you soured a potentially lucrative future business contact, but you have messed up the opportunity to date Matt, who is a ruggedly handsome college football star. "
Weird, the other time I was in this scenario, the person was ugly.
Next>>
[Emotional]
"Your dad decides he wants to have a "long talk" with you about college. In his talk he advises you to do all the things you think you would like to do least. He is pushing hard for you to attend a college VERY close to home. In the middle of everything, he says, "You know, Sweetheart, I don't know how necessary a college education is for women, anyway."
You get the distinct sense that he has already planned the next eight years of your life for you.
Select a mood :
-ANGRY
-ANXIOUS
-DEPRESSED
-CALM
Select an action :
-LISTEN QUIETLY
-TELL HIM THAT YOU DISAGREE WITH WHAT HE IS SAYING"
No doubt that he thinks we need to go back to the kitchen.
-ANGRY
-TELL HIM THAT YOU DISAGREE WITH WHAT HE IS SAYING
"It is clear that the goals he wants for you and your own goals may not be in agreement right now. Perhaps he is being overly pushy. A direct angry confrontation with him right now puts him on the defensive. The conversation ends when he says, "You'll go and you'll thank me for it some day." You reply, "That's what YOU think. I'll do what I want." "
That's the ticket! You tell him, sister! Nothing shall stop us in our pursuit of incline.
Next>>
[Emotional]
"One of the older kids in school takes you aside and offers you a quick way to make money by dealing drugs -- nothing too heavy or dangerous, according to him. All you would have to deal is some pot and a few ludes. No one will ever suspect a girl.
Select a mood :
-INTERESTED
-NOT INTERESTED
Select an action :
-TELL HIM YOU WILL DO IT
-REFUSE TO DO IT"
Pots always good. Makes me a little paranoid, though.
-INTERESTED
-TELL HIM YOU WILL DO IT
"Your first deal is at 3 o'clock on Thursday.
You are not calm enough to pull off this deal without getting caught. You are busted by a teacher.
Fortunately, you don't have much of a reputation for doing things like this. As a result, you are given a five-day suspension from school. Family relations decline because of the stress you have caused. "
This is what we get for not having enough skill points in street-wise.
Next>>
"A little while later...
You have found a new way of "expressing yourself" through the way you comb your hair -- straight up.
Everyone in the house just treats you like some kind of alien until you get a more conventional hair style. Relationships with family members become even cooler than they already are. "
So wait, she styled her hair like some sort of troll doll?
Next>>
[Physical]
"A cousin of yours asks if you would like to inherit her wig collection.
Select a mood :
-INTERESTED
-NOT INTERESTED
Select an action :
-ACCEPT THE WIGS
-PASS ON THE OFFER"
Eh?
-NOT INTERESTED
-PASS ON THE OFFER
"You always thought your cousin was a little weird.
Now you know you were wrong--she's a LOT weird. The only place you can see for those wigs is at the end of a leash! "
Cousins may be weird, but they can also be kind of hot.
Next>>
[Intellectual]
"All of your friends are skipping class, and they want you to come along, too.
Select a mood :
-INTERESTED
-UNINTERESTED
Select an action :
-SKIP CLASS
-GO TO CLASS"
-UNINTERESTED
-GO TO CLASS
"You spend a boring day in class, thinking about what your friends are probably doing.
Select an action :
-BEGIN TO DAYDREAM
-DO YOUR SCHOOL WORK"
Probably doing something retarded like playing Super Mario games.
-DO YOUR SCHOOL WORK
"You are very studious -- and very lucky as well. After school, gorgeous Bob Freidrickson asks you to tutor him in math. Looks like it was worth staying around, after all. "
Brainy people get all the cock.
Next>>
Chapter's getting pretty meaty, lets check our stats:
"ALTER EGO
LIFE STATUS
Occupation: (NONE)
Relationship status: UNATTACHED
Familial: 19
Intellectual: 60
Physical: 100
Social: 95
Vocational: 53
Calmness: 28
Confidence: 98
Expressiveness: 75
Gentleness: 46
Happiness: 74
Thoughtfulness: 80
Trustworthiness: 65
Money: 526
Income per turn: 0
Thoughtless spending per turn: 12
Acquisitions: (NONE) "
Our diminishing intelligence disturbs me.
If you want me to try either the school, relationships, work or risk options, speak now or forever hold your peace.
Damn I just have to play this someday.
position for us to earn.
Powerful.
