Let's Play Magna Mundi: Pakistan Ascendant

[Azira]

You know, this is the first only time I actually find myself hoping for total and utter disintegration of your empire when you reach the end-game...

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

That's been done twice already. This is the LP with world conquest succeeding.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

World conquest is inevitable under the glorious reign of the Andhairavids, but not within this time frame. I intend to make a very large yet efficient and powerful Empire.

 

[Cenobyte]

Totally awesome

 

[Fafnir]

Totally awesome

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Much to my bros for the positive reaction. I was a tad worried you guys might not like it because I had already done a nomadic conquest LP with the Mongols. Updatan.

 

[Conkrete Knight]

I was a tad worried you guys might not like it because I had already done a nomadic conquest LP with the Mongols. Updatan.

This is not a mere "nomadic" conquest. No, this is the establishment of the divine, natural order. A time of righteous judgement, and a tale of a world better than ours :')

Also, I truly enjoyed your last LP, and am sorry for not commenting. My neighbour removed my internetcabel for some inane reason, so my time on the net was radically reduced.

 

[Cassidy]

Religion of peace.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Conquest.

The horde moves onwards. The rumbling of hoof beats and the twang of bowstrings heralds another victory for Andhaira and his nomads. Marching down across the Khorasan mountains, the first Andhairavid brings his men galloping around the retreating Khorasani army. The maneuver is both drastic and effective. The Khan's army is forced to battle and slaughtered, although the Khan himself escapes. He will regret forgoing an honourable death alongside his warriors.

Amongst the Baluchi tribesmen, not all fight on horseback. Some of the hardiest men live up high in the mountains, scraping out a living despite the harsh punishment of nature. These men are strong and quick, with or without a mount. They compliment the predominantly cavalry army well, at least on a strategic level. These mountain tribesmen can busy themselves with the occupation of rightful Baluchi lands. Meanwhile, Andhaira can continue to ravage Khorasani and Persian armies.

Andhaira raids into the lands of the Black Sheep. Many small patrols or freshly raised levies are scattered to the winds. Many evils are delivered upon the tillers of the land. Do not weep over them, for they are only civilized. During his raids, he receives terrible news from the lands of the White Sheep. Despite the valiant resistance of the White Sheep Turkomans, their army has been mauled by a combined force of Mamelukes and Persians. The Khan assures Andhaira that they will not surrender, but they cannot hold out for long. The Shah must act quickly to crush the Khorasani before the Black Sheep turn Eastwards.

The great Shah withdraws the horde from Persia. Sistan and Makran must be taken. These are the Baluchi lands that the tribes have set their sights upon. The nomads here long for independence from their Khorasani masters. They will make fine additions to the great horde. The Khorasani defenders shall be driven out. After that, Andhaira will be free to wreak bloody mayhem amongst the ranks of his hated enemies.

Unable to count on the loyalty of the local population, the defenders are driven out in short order. All that remains is for Andhaira to drive the foe before his horsemen until they finally concede.

The campaign continues. The Khorasani Khan, the courageous imbecile that he is, refuses to contemplate the notion of defeat. Andhaira will have to drive his point home. The Khan attempts to muster a force in North Khorasan. It is scattered in all directions. All that stands between mighty Andhaira and total victory is the possibility of a joint Mameluke-Persian attack.

The White Sheep has fallen. Now Andhaira must brace himself for the coming carnage. It will be bloody and glorious. Total victory or total defeat.

The Mamelukes begin approaching. Soon they will spill out of Persia in force. They must not be allowed to mass together. Clever maneuvering combined with hard, decisive attacks will be key. An open battle against the entire enemy would be foolish and suicidal. Bravery is a manly virtue, idiocy is not.

The Persian city dwellers are sent flying back westwards. Mercy is not a virtue for such worthless human cattle. They fight with the vigour of an aged and dying goat. They have only half the comeliness.

Basham, one of the Shah's most loyal and trusted generals, is given command of a small force to starve out the Khorasani capital of Herat. A larger Persian force attacks him. Andhaira is unable to send aid, delayed by the initial Persian attack. Despite the poor odds, Basham achieves a magnificent victory. It is a small triumph, but it is well deserved. Andhaira's trust is vindicated.

The Shah pulls his horde around to central Khorasan. The city dwellers must be driven out, or they might march into Baluchistan and wreak havoc amongst the tribes. This is a gamble. The mixed Iranian force there shouldn't be a problem, but war is never predictable.

Hmmph. Timur is rolling in his grave.

The maneuver is a complete success. So rapid was it, that Andhaira is left with the opportunity to wipe out the initial Mameluke force.

A victory as sweet as a beautiful goat. The initial wave has been turned back. Through the manliness of his hordes, the grace of God, and his own genius, Andhaira has turned back two of the mightiest Islamic powers. Mighty no longer, if this is the best they can do.

The second wave of city-dwellers blindly surges along the coast. Andhaira immediately gallops south to meet them. The defeat is utter, the victory glorious. Andhaira immediately rides west to destroy the remains of the Persian force. A Mameluke army is also found marching Eastwards. The imbeciles are persistent, that is certain.

More worthless settled soldiers are slaughtered. Despite constant defeat and humiliation, their Khans seem surprisingly undaunted. If this continues, then eventually it will not matter if they are stubborn or not. Soldiers do not merely march out of the desert to serve. They cannot sustain this for long.

The city of Herat is starved out. Thousands are killed. The Timurid Khan of Khorasan is captured. How far the mighty have fallen.

He does not seem to comprehend what has happened. One could pause for thought and find it amusing, but their are still many more enemies to destroy. It would appear that only the complete and utter annihilation of every last drop of manpower will persuade them to peace.

Suddenly, the tables are turned. The Persian and Mamelukes may well have thrown everything they have left into the killing field. There are too many to risk direct battle. Let them tire themselves in the mountains of Sistan. Andhaira and his nomads can ride freely and without fear of attack. If Sistan is lost, the enemy will be weakened. Then, the Shah can pounce.

The toll in men is high, but the enemy take Sistan. The army disintegrates, heading in multiple directions. Now is the time to strike.

Thousands of city-dwelling infantrymen are massacred. Andhaira does not even deign to give them an honourable death. After the battle, the field is littered with arrows.

The remains of the army flee back into Persia. A detachment of troops under Basham is sent to retake Sistan.

The region of Kandahar is isolated from the rest of Khorasan. A joint raid is organised under the leadership of a major tribal chief.

With God's blessing, the raid is another triumph for the Andhairavid hordes. The world does not yet pay homage to the mountains, but a small part of its wealth has been plundered.

Like lambs to the slaughter. Like goats to the brothel.

Andhaira attempts to gauge the political situation in Persia. The Shah discovers through slightly less than wholesome means that there is significant opposition to the war. Not surprising, considering the list of Persian victories numbers just under one. The Shah offers a very generous peace deal to the Khan of the Black Sheep, knowing that he will refuse. This will no doubt cause a great stir in Persia. With his army reduced to a handful of soldiers, and his country torn inside out, the Khan will have to swallow his pride and admit defeat.

The war is a mighty burden for his people, but Andhaira urges his nomads on. The victories are plentiful, but at a great cost in Baluchi life. Nevertheless, God has imbued man with great skill in the making of more men. These losses will be replenished quickly enough after the war ends.

Sistan is Andhairavid once more! Nothing can stand in the way of the Shah, but the tribes are exhausted. The war has been appallingly bloody. Despite the urging of some of his more bloodthirsty generals, Andhaira proposes an individual peace to the Khorasani Khan.

Himself captured, his army destroyed, his country torn asunder. Finally the fool realises how total his defeat is. Despite his pride, the Khan concedes the Baluchi lands.

The Baluchi people are one! Now Andhaira the mighty need only point and shout, and whatever he sets his eyes upon will be his!

 

[kazgar]

The garrison were allowed to march out, convinced of the existence of Djinn

May all those that oppose the glorious empire be destroyed beneath your hooves!

 

[Qah]

Beware of the Transoxianan bastards, they were once under Timur's rule, and are technically the rightful bastard heirs of the great timurid empire.

 

[LusciousPear]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but the most sustainable way to keep a large empire is to only keep the rich provinces, and release the poorer ones over time? That way, you can keep researchin' at a decent pace...

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

I suppose so. Some poorer provinces are still worth keeping for strategic reasons. The desert provinces i took as the Knights were actually quite useful in my wars against Qara Koyunhu. There are also a lot of provinces in India with low base tax but very valuable trade resources.

Transoxiana are a bunch of faggots. Khorasan also had a Timurid Khan, but that didn't help much.

 

[Gondolin]

The garrison surrender message cracked me up. :D

 

[Cenobyte]

So much lulz and the game's just beginning

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

Beware of the Transoxianan bastards, they were once under Timur's rule, and are technically the rightful bastard heirs of the great timurid empire.

No, for they are a bunch of Uzbeks. Thus, they are the weak link in the great chain of nomadism.

 

[Infantryman]

Excellent LP indeed, my only concern is that it doesn't seem challenging at all. In the previous ones you stomped over your enemies with your superior morale or discipline and now thanks to your über-pro monarch. At present you're steamrolling through the armies of powers 20 times larger than you. And it seems it will only get easier as you win more provinces. It looks as if AI has a fatal flaw that makes them send their army in small detachments that allows you to rape them one by one. Admittedly, your incredible skills also should be taken into account. Nevertheless, it's great fun to read this !

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Well, the reason for my victories, beyond the high quality of my armies, is that I'm avoiding battles i can lose. They still outnumber me heavily, so i have to make sure to avoid facing huge stacks. I just send Andhaira running around demolishing small and medium stacks which preserves manpower. That way when the war hinges on a single major battle with a large enemy stack, i have enough troops to win.

 

[Serious_Business]

D: D: D: D:
What is this. You should have done Sengoku japan, that was what was second in the pool last time. Oh well, maybe next time I hope

 

[GarfunkeL]

Oh my, this is great! MAKE IT COUNT!

 

[Cassidy]

D: D: D: D:
What is this. You should have done Sengoku japan, that was what was second in the pool last time. Oh well, maybe next time I hope

Actually, the Aztecs were the second most voted in the poll.

Andhairavids, Aztecs or Sengoku Japan, which is better and why?

DISCUSS!!!

 

[Qah]

Beware of the Transoxianan bastards, they were once under Timur's rule, and are technically the rightful bastard heirs of the great timurid empire.

No, for they are a bunch of Uzbeks. Thus, they are the weak link in the great chain of nomadism.

Uzbeks that randomely form the Timurids in my goddamn games as the byzantines. And trust me, Timurids+Transitional Monarchy=brutal wars of attrition.

 

[LusciousPear]

Fuck now, we're a bunch of storyfags.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

It's not as if it's at all serious, my Shah is a goat-fucker called Andhaira for Allah's sake.

 

[Furious Flaming Faggot]

Sistan and Makran are conquered. All of the Baluchi tribes have been brought under one flag, the magnificent visage of the Shah. By God's will and Andhaira's might, all of the tribes of his people are now one, yet there is still much to do.

The Mamelukes and the Persians have been beaten. Only they themselves doubt the reality of their defeat. Enemy troops continue to wander about Baluchistan. They must be humbled. The Baluchi homeland is sacred ground, ever since Andhaira first stepped foot upon it and made it his own homeland. These people dare call Andhaira and his people savages, yet they eat goats copulate with women, completely opposite to the natural order of things.

Hmmph, they must expect war in the traditional style of the city dwellers. What has happened to the great Turkic and Mongolian cavalry traditions of these people? Andhaira resolves that even if his people fall prey to the decadent ways of the city, the martial prowess of Baluchistan must never slip.

The Sultan of Bihar offers an alliance to the great Shah, presumably against the Sultan of Delhi. Andhaira humours the Bihari Sultan. Like most "civilised" monarchs he will not think much of his duties to the alliance if it does not profit him.

The grateful tribes of Makran and Sistan bring a small tribute to Andhaira. It is a token gesture, but even the smallest gift is useful in the hands of a wise man.

The situation in the new Baluchi lands is tense. Andhaira's claims as Khagan of the Baluchis are recognised. Many tribes even swear loyalty, but the tribes are still practically autonomous. They must be brought into line. When all the tribes bring tribute to the feet of Andhaira, then he can look to the construction of his Empire. There is a long way to go indeed.

Under the wise rule of Andhaira, the cities of the Indus prosper. Indeed, some tribesmen even move to settle along the Indus. Throughout most of Baluchistan, the nomadic life is dominant. Along the small stretch of the Indus that runs through the domains of Andhaira, agriculture becomes a way of life, albeit an undeveloped one. What infantry finds its way into Andhaira's cavalry hordes come from the cities. Tribute from these settlements bring great wealth to the Shah. Andhaira's power base shifts, ever so slightly, towards the city. The change is both irresistible and unnoticeable. In the future Andhaira, or his children, will be confronted by this development. For now, Baluchistan has taken the first step towards an Empire of cities.

Under the strain of internal dissent and external military disaster, the Khan of the Black Sheep finally abandons his stubbornness. He concedes defeat to Andhaira and his nomads. The war is won. The Persians and Arabs have been humbled. The nomads ride with loot and fiery hearts, and all is good.

In his pride, Andhaira even goes so far as to arrange a marriage between a Baluchi Khan and a Persian princess. Perhaps taken aback at the sudden and enormous reversal of policy, the Black Sheep Khan accepts. Even if the Black Sheep recovers from this defeat, Andhaira has asserted his dynasty as a major power in the region. The Baluchis will never again have to drink from the soiled well of insignificance.

They will have to drink from the cup of defeat though.

Elsewhere, a fairly interesting but probably inconsequential development. Who knows, the actions of a far away nation can send ripples across the world. Only time will tell. For now, a union of Christians will no doubt create a firmer opposition against the true faith.

Some particularly loyal tribes begin calling for Andhaira to assert himself as a true monarch, in practice as much as title. A dynasty established on divine right and stable succession would bring Baluchistan great prosperity and glory, they say. Andhaira smiles upon their loyalty, although this was the plan since the beginning of his reign.

The tribes also call out for a war with the Transoxianans, demanding that the heirs of Timur must be humbled. We will see. Andhaira has no ambitions towards that region, nor does he have ambitions towards Samarkand. If circumstances dictate it, the Shah would gladly humiliate them on the battlefield, but he has no desire to go out of his way to attack the Pashtuns and Uzbeks in their imposing mountains.

Andhaira demands that the tribes of Makran and Sistan give up traditional privileges and autonomy, and that they pay tribute to the mighty Shah. They refuse as expected, giving Andhaira cause to subjugate these tribes by force.

The tribes rise up, and are promptly put down.

Andhaira offers surrender on his earlier terms. If they succumb, then that will bring the matter to a speedy conclusion.

Most tribes give in and pay their tribute. A few don't. They will be dealt with.

Over in India, the Bihari Sultan seems to have picked a fight with Delhi. This will no doubt leave them all weaker. The fools have no concept of how a proper war is fought. They will make easy prey when the time is right.

The last remnants of tribal independence are put down, both in Sistan and Makran. There are but a few steps to take from this. First, Andhaira must centralise his rule before establishing a proper dynastic succession.

Rather than risking the ire of the major clans by selecting an Indus city as a capital, Andhaira opts for something a bit more austere. A desolate mountain stronghold is selected as capital. Andhaira and his retinue move in.
Hardly glorious, but it will do for now. It is made the center of what little bureaucracy is needed. There is hardly a government to centralise, but this is a symbolic first step towards a true monarchy. Court will be held here, tribute will be brought here, and the few cities will be governed from here.

There is only one step left to take, but it is still quite far away. Andhaira can content himself for now with the manliest of sports, war. The Emir of Sind doesn't seem to have much of an army...