Review Mass Effect 3: A Narratological Review

[VentilatorOfDoom]

the only reson im giving this a 1 is beacuase the voices where pretty good

 

[Stinger]

ALL YOU DO IS PRESS THE SPACEBAR! HOW IS THIS AN RPG ANYWAY?!

 

[Cowboy Moment]

Hiver fightin' the good fight with his Tourette's.

 

[random_encounter]

Worse, the Reapers prosecute their genocidal war in the least intelligent way imaginable. They don't opt for a decapitating strike on the Citadel​

Indeed they don't (though they do move it), and if you paid attention you'd know the reason for this is that they need the citadel and it is a very important part of continuing their cycle. But I guess you'd say that's just a silly excuse or something, like all explanations for things you deem 'plot holes.'

What is worse is that the rebuttal saying "it is a very important blah, blah, blah" apparently doesn't grasp that "decapitation" doesn't necessarily mean "LET'S GO EXPLODE THE CITADEL AND EVERYBODIES". They could have gone in, scrubbed the life from the Citadel using neutron-powered WD-40, and went on their merry way. But whatever.

Great writeup by TNO.

 

[Sceptic]

Decent review. Tries too hard to portray the game in a negative light however

Really? if anything I thought it was leaning more heavily on the side of tolerating some of the plot's excessive idiocy.

Except it wasn't anywhere even close to the combined might of the galaxy. It wasn't even the combined Citadel forces.

Go back and replat ME1. After you complete all 4 plot worlds the Council specifically mention they are going to bring as much power as possible to the Citadel to defend against Saren leading a geth attack.

That's, uh, kind of the point. It's supposed to be a hopeless situation, how many times did Hackett say you can't beat the reapers conventionally? The catalyst is the only hope, and you've got to struggle to unite the galaxy.

If your response to "can't be beat conventionally" is a deus ex machina, then you've still got massive plot problems.

Indeed they don't (though they do move it), and if you paid attention you'd know the reason for this is that they need the citadel and it is a very important part of continuing their cycle. But I guess you'd say that's just a silly excuse or something, like all explanations for things you deem 'plot holes.'

First, they move it in the very last act of the game, after having puttered around the entire rest of the galaxy doing fuckall about the control center that, as was repeatedly stated in the first games, is the key to them winning ASAP. Second, your "reason" actually proves TNO's point: since they need the Citadel and it is a very important part of continuing their cycle, why the hell do they NOT do anything about it for 95% of the game? And why do they move it to Earth, of all places, as opposed to a system they fully control (like near Thessia, or hell even the Batarian homeworld)? and why do they keep the relay network open now that they've got their hands on the control center and their strategy for 40 million years has always been to turn it off ASAP? But I guess you'd say there's a perfectly good reason or something, like all the plot holes for things you deem have "explanations".

I disagree with your opinions in regards to the writing (I think it's fine, even very good in places)

Congratulations, you've just agreed with him.

 

[861129]

Nice wall of text in response to the retards argument of "lol its too deep4u im not explaining here is a list of stuff".

Successful troll is successful.

Yeah, but bitching about ME is pretty cathartic in any case.

(don't see the trolling, anyway)

 

[hiver]

btw, if anyone wonders, cowboy moment is just an ignored internet retard i call turdbrain, deservedly. I insult him once in a while so he follows me around and posts stupid shit and brofists my posts all the time.
I guess that happens when you create an overwhelming butthurt to some dumbfuck.

How pathetic is that?

 

[sgc_meltdown]

That Amioran gentleman now appears to be scolding his fellow community members for resurrecting the thread in question without any input.

Guy just likes setting people straight I guess. It's a shame he didn't register here to fight his good fight with his words.

 

[Oriebam]

btw, if anyone wonders, cowboy moment is just an ignored internet retard i call turdbrain, deservedly. I insult him once in a while so he follows me around and posts stupid shit and brofists my posts all the time.
I guess that happens when you create an overwhelming butthurt to some dumbfuck.

How pathetic is that?

not more pathetic than your attempt at a comeback, that's for sure

"herp he's fucking around with me it must be butthurt and not at all related to me behaving like a circus monkey"

If you didn't behave so hysterically people wouldn't respond that way, hiver

not that I dislike your posts or anything, they're actually p. good, honestly, they tend to brighten my day

never take any medications change man

edit: wanted to add: if you want to be a retard and make a spectacle, that's fine, we'll all root for you, just don't fucking take things seriously man

 

[Clockwork Knight]

Shepard spins his dick like a helicopter, every Reaper dies. Joker goes blind from the glory, falls down and breaks every bone. EDI comes rushing to his rescue but in her hurry she forgot her metallic hands can crush his mushy body like an orange. Fade to black with a pained scream from seth Green. The end.


fucking sleep drprivation

 

[deus101]

 

[Cowboy Moment]

You know, when the xenforo regime was first instituted, I was apprehensive towards the next-gen brofists. They felt wrong, as if a part of Fagbook was forcefully transplanted into healthy Codexian tissue. Alas, Ed123 has shown me a way, a good way, to utilize them without angering the spirits of our forefathers. For that, he has my gratitude. Have a proper brofist, Ed.

 

[Malpercio]

Wait, wat.

Did i enter a wormhole or something? Why is someone defending Mass Erect 3 plot on the codex? WHAT'S GOING ON???

 

[hiver]

I think i answered that, havent I?

/

Oh gee even more brofists from morons and internet retards.
I think they think thats smart or ironic or something...

 

[deus101]

I think i answered that, havent I?

/

Oh gee even more brofists from morons and internet retards.
I think they think thats smart or ironic or something...

ED123 brofits EVERYONE. Fucking slut.

 

[Oriebam]

I think i answered that, havent I?

/

Oh gee even more brofists from morons and internet retards.
I think they think thats smart or ironic or something...

what is the difference between a moron, a retard and a internet retard?


why do you assume we think it's a smart move(it's very obviously not), or even ironic? can't a brofist be farcical(this is actually distinct from ironic)? why do you assume we can't genuinely appreciate your posts?

 

[sgc_meltdown]

Fucking slut.

what did sluts ever did to you deus101

did they refuse to become your tail gunner

if you know what I mean

 

[deus101]

btw, if anyone wonders, cowboy moment is just an ignored internet retard i call turdbrain, deservedly. I insult him once in a while so he follows me around and posts stupid shit and brofists my posts all the time.
I guess that happens when you create an overwhelming butthurt to some dumbfuck.

How pathetic is that?

not more pathetic than your attempt at a comeback, that's for sure

"herp he's fucking around with me it must be butthurt and not at all related to me behaving like a circus monkey"

If you didn't behave so hysterically people wouldn't respond that way, hiver

not that I dislike your posts or anything, they're actually p. good, honestly, they tend to brighten my day

never take any medications change man

edit: wanted to add: if you want to be a retard and make a spectacle, that's fine, we'll all root for you, just don't fucking take things seriously man

Are they picking on you in school or something?

Every post you make is either in one of the various link-threads, or trying to join in whenever 2 or more people are flaming.

 

[deus101]

Fucking slut.

what did sluts ever did to you deus101

did they refuse to become your tail gunner

if you know what I mean

I keep getting shot down

 

[Oriebam]

btw, if anyone wonders, cowboy moment is just an ignored internet retard i call turdbrain, deservedly. I insult him once in a while so he follows me around and posts stupid shit and brofists my posts all the time.
I guess that happens when you create an overwhelming butthurt to some dumbfuck.

How pathetic is that?

not more pathetic than your attempt at a comeback, that's for sure

"herp he's fucking around with me it must be butthurt and not at all related to me behaving like a circus monkey"

If you didn't behave so hysterically people wouldn't respond that way, hiver

not that I dislike your posts or anything, they're actually p. good, honestly, they tend to brighten my day

never take any medications change man

edit: wanted to add: if you want to be a retard and make a spectacle, that's fine, we'll all root for you, just don't fucking take things seriously man

Are they picking on you in school or something?

Every post you make is either in one of the various link-threads, or trying to join in whenever 2 or more people are flaming.

I'm just your run-of-the-mill shitposter

link-threads? You mean BTE and shit? Anyway, I like the lulz and the drama, it's one of the best things this board(or the internet, really) can provide... and it's what gets me hard, unfortunately...

also the threads move fast and are easily the most amusing, even if you're interested in all the other actual game-related threads


and you're probably wrong on the "every post you make is an attempt at ganging up on someone or mockery", I say probably because it's unlikely someone is going to analyze all my posts to come up with a correct answer

okay, maybe you're a little right about making fun of things, but it shouldn't be that high a percentage... and the post you quoted isn't even a good example of ganging up on someone, what the hell man, go look up liberal's threads or something

 

[hiver]

btw, if anyone wonders, cowboy moment is just an ignored internet retard i call turdbrain, deservedly. I insult him once in a while so he follows me around and posts stupid shit and brofists my posts all the time.
I guess that happens when you create an overwhelming butthurt to some dumbfuck.

How pathetic is that?

not more pathetic than your attempt at a comeback, that's for sure

"herp he's fucking around with me it must be butthurt and not at all related to me behaving like a circus monkey"

If you didn't behave so hysterically people wouldn't respond that way, hiver

not that I dislike your posts or anything, they're actually p. good, honestly, they tend to brighten my day

never take any medications change man

edit: wanted to add: if you want to be a retard and make a spectacle, that's fine, we'll all root for you, just don't fucking take things seriously man

Are they picking on you in school or something?

Every post you make is either in one of the various link-threads, or trying to join in whenever 2 or more people are flaming.

not more pathetic than your attempt at a comeback, that's for sure

"herp he's fucking around with me it must be butthurt and not at all related to me behaving like a circus monkey"

Youre talking to yourself again retard.

You two imbeciles and knotalt, a new dumbfuck around here are just so incredibly butthurt because someone just told you what you are.

And then you prove it with single stupid post i see, which fortunately isnt a lot.
And this one especially proves it.

Youre just got left without anything actual to say so you reverted to this lowest of moronities of like youre giving me brofists because im like raging and thats like amusing to you guys....

You know, that just gives me all the excuse and reason i need to continue with abuse and pain infliction.
Thats all :D

Oh i see i need to update my turd codexers picture too

So yeah...keep it up shit stains.

 

[deus101]

Hiver is cool unlike you two.

 

[hiver]

And actually smart, and good looking.

Hiver: technological,... intellectual,...... physical,

....

emotional.

 

[deus101]

I'm just your run-of-the-mill shitposter

link-threads? You mean BTE and shit? Anyway, I like the lulz and the drama, it's one of the best things this board(or the internet, really) can provide... and it's what gets me hard, unfortunately...

also the threads move fast and are easily the most amusing, even if you're interested in all the other actual game-related threads


and you're probably wrong on the "every post you make is an attempt at ganging up on someone or mockery", I say probably because it's unlikely someone is going to analyze all my posts to come up with a correct answer

okay, maybe you're a little right about making fun of things, but it shouldn't be that high a percentage... and the post you quoted isn't even a good example of ganging up on someone, what the hell man, go look up liberal's threads or something

So when you post in RPG and GAME...you aren't there to discuss the respective topics

 

[Oriebam]

"derp I posted a laughter emoticon I am totally showing those morosn of shaddenfraud whos bawss and not at all pathetically trying to divert attention"

Youre talking to yourself again retard.

No, I'm talking to you. As obviously evidenced by your responses..

You two imbeciles and knotalt, a new dumbfuck around here are just so incredibly butthurt because someone just told you what you are.

what's wrong hiver, why can't you type things right?

Why aren't you trying to disprove my claims about your behavior, is it because I'm right? nah, must be because I'm a turdslurper who doesn't deserve your attention, as evidenced by your angry response

... oh wait

And then you prove it with single stupid post i see, which fortunately isnt a lot.
And this one especially proves it.

this gigantic redundant attempt at an insult you call a post reeks more of butthurt than anything anyone has ever said to you here, hiver

Youre just got left without anything actual to say so you reverted to this lowest of moronities of like youre giving me brofists because im like raging and thats like amusing to you guys....

No, that's what YOU'RE doing.

You know, that just gives me all the excuse and reason i need to continue with abuse and pain infliction.
Thats all :D

No one's getting abused or being inflicted any pain here, we actually like the shit you post, you know.
:D

actually I kind of worry for you because of comments like this one and the fucking shit eating picture you keep editing, that's just not healthy, man, think about what you're doing for a moment

Oh i see i need to update my turd codexers picture too

p-p-p-please don't d-d-do eeeeeeet

I b-beg you

that picture does a(MUCH) better job at shaming you than it does any of the people mentioned in it, btw

So yeah...keep it up shit stains.

You too, dear turdbrain.

On your next reply try to address the actual content of my first reply to you here, pls

So when you post in RPG and GAME...you aren't there to discuss the respective topics

HAHAHA NEVER

wat'cha gon' do 'bout it honky-boy