With regards to the Elf, it is not their "gayness" that irritates me, stick your dick where you want i'm not interested in your sex life has always been my maxim. What irritates me is their supposed superiority, how they are better, wiser, more beautiful and noble than mankind. This invariably attracts the same kind of person, along with the vampire fans, smug elitists who believe that their shit doesn't stink and that they are looking down on their fellow man from a great height. Mankind is varied, we have great minds, conquerers, artists, leaders, architects, heroes, explorers and honest, humble workers and also shit slurping, scrounging, moronic scum of the earth. We are better and worse, to try and remove ourselves by emulating the other is foolish and dangerous, and may well lead to dyed hair.
As for Tolkien, and many of his contemporaries, well we can all see why they wanted to escape into a fantastic world where there are creatures better than humanity. After all they had seen the worst side of our species, and horror we probably can't concieve of, but for a soft modern man utterly unused to true tribulation to flee humanity in such a way...that tells.