Review Skyrim!

[Akasen]

Too all who question where the "easy to learn, but hard to master" quote is coming from, allow me to bring the source (assuming you haven't Googled it yet).

All the best games are easy to learn and difficult to master. They should reward the first quarter and the hundredth.

As for Skyrim itself: Fuck it. I have my younger brother jizzing hist pants right now as he plays it on his PC saying, "I enjoy this game this much" while he stretches his arms as I have my back turned, resisting the urge to rebuttal "I like it this much" whilst flipping the bird.

I find it fitting though that his friend brought MW3 today for the 360 and the whole day he kept cursing like there is no tomorrow and yelling at the top of his voice.

 

[commie]

Also, the GDR never created actual Socialism, just party-controlled state capitalism.

How right you are. Funny how when I would suggest that, people would call me an apologist. Here I was just trollin...




A shame that the new Zelda game is only on the Wii as it's getting scores on a par with Skyrim and seems to have far better combat. Would have been great to see the GOTM(millennium) get replaced a couple of days later.

I remember when even good games didn't get a 94/100

Planescape Torment:
Eurogamer 7/10
PC Zone 87%

System Shock 2:
Gamespot 8.5/10

Thief 2:
PC Zone 8.2/10
PC Gamer US 89%

Fallout:
Gamespot 8.7/10

 

[torpid]

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

This is the point where I'd put in an emoticon but I've no idea which one even fits. So lemme just copy/paste some more

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. A work of sheer genius.

 

[commie]

Fun fact, Dragon Age 2, Deus Ex Human Revolution and Portal 2 also got 94s from PC Gamer. I think it's fair to assume that's just the score the big publishers all pay for regardless of quality.

Interesting. I didn't know of this similarity. It is ridiculous to apply a percentage based score at any rate. Why would all these disparate games have the same percentage score? Why would all the negatives in each add up to precisely 6/100 and the positives the rest? Why is Skyrim deserving of 94 and not 93 or 95? Why would all the reviewers rate their games in exactly the same way?

The only thing that makes sense is that paying for a 94 kind of gives a bit more 'integrity' to the score, as 95+ looks a bit too exaggerated but 94 being a bit below the half way mark between 90 and 100 makes it look like the reviewer was being hard but fair.

 

[AlaCarcuss]

Oh codex, you're as predictable as the fanboy sites... (in a good way or course).

 

[turul]

Review By Steve Farrelly
"The huge winged beast blocked out the sun on its first pass overhead, and the battlefield stopped as if frozen in time. "




Somebody slap this idiot back to reality, I thought I was reading a review, not a loon on acid trip!

 

[flushfire]

Too all who question where the "easy to learn, but hard to master" quote is coming from, allow me to bring the source (assuming you haven't Googled it yet).

No need but you should read the comments again bec. you seem to have missed the point entirely.

 

[waywardOne]

I'm truly surprised there's been no mention of excessive pre-order faggotry or bonus shit that is free with a new game but a premium for second-handers (Cerberus network, etc). However shitty the game actually is, there's a slight 7 degree incline with it.

 

[Abelon Blanchetourbe]

Won't bother to rage about it.

Now you got me worried.

 

[xemous]

skyrim was good

 

[Ekkoe]

Hah, I love those logic contradictions. I remember Gamespot doing the same for GTA4:

THIS GAME IS PERFECT BUT THE STEERING IS A LITTLE BAD AND THE AI ISN'T GREAT.

Who needs logic when reviewing a game, right?

I'm dutch, the biggest dutch review team, Gamekings, actually had nothing bad to say about Skyrim is well, and, better yet, they have an add, voiced by their most mindless Bethesda fanboy, in which he yells "WE HAVE THE REVIEW OF THE GREATEST GAIM OF ALL TIIIME!"

I actually mailed them once about how mindless their Oblivion reviews were and how all they ever did was praise it, and how I was afraid that the same would happen for Skyrim. I told them they should be more critical of the Bethesda''s past and actually look at what they should've learned from Daggerfall and Morrowind. They read the letter in a video and the fanboy responded: "The games may have become less broad (smaller world, less skills), but they've reached more depth."

Because a linear dialogue system and fewer skills with less options is deep as shit.

Is anyone still crusading for this? I'm still posting "The Only Honest Oblivion Review" on websites a lot, but sites like /v/ already accept that Bethesda has become a mainstream company who makes sandbox games rather than RPGs. Bethesda themselves seem to embrace the populism with their Apple-inspired UI and YouTube is full of videos of people showing Skyrim bugs already, showing that no one really takes the game THAT seriously anymore.

Maybe it's just time to accept that the people who think Oblivion is a deep RPG are like the people who think the show "24" has good writing... fuck 'em.

 

[Saark]

You don't see a "what sucks about call of duty article", because Activision would be fucking pissed that the money they spent to get good publicity was not giving them good publicity.

Bethesda makes good games (albeit buggy), and thus doesn't need to pay off reviewers. Which you can tell from the actual CRITICISM.

You heard it here first guys. Bethesda makes good but buggy games, unlike Obsidian.

 

[Data4]

A few observations --

They said the game world is roughly the same size as Oblivion. Either they're lying or they've gone from "blah" to "fucking awesome" in the way the land is laid out. I just ran from Riverwood to Riften and it took goddamn forever.

Pros:
1. Character models are better than Oblivion's. You know I'm right. Are they perfect? No, but a big improvement over the Down's faces in Oblivion, and the Dunmer in particular look fantastic. They look like a high resolution version of what they were trying to accomplish in Morrowind.

2. More varied land features. Gone are hillsides littered with the same three grass-topped boulder models. Roots, stumps, all sorts of rocks, cairns, logs, dead trees, and all kinds of grasses make the landscape look much more natural.

3. Water. 'Nuff said.

4. Random shit in the world that will fuck your face if you're not prepared for it.

5. Wider selection of voice actors, though Lynda Carter's horribly miscast orc female voice in Oblivion will always come to mind every time I hear her. Thankfully, it's only been once.

Cons:

1. That pseudo-Swedish accent is starting to get old, and sounds more and more fake every time I hear it.

2. Dialogues are hackneyed. Some of the stuff NPCs say when you end a conversation has nothing to do with the topics discussed. It would have been better if they left farewells to just "Farewell" or even simply "Goodbye".

3. Spazzing, vibrating shadows.

4. Animations range from servicable to "HAHAHA!! Oh wow!"

5. Did I mention Lynda Carter?

6. Texturing overload. Sometimes, packing a bunch of detail into an enclosed space can flip the signal to noise ratio into the negative. Several times, I skipped looking for crap laying around because it was hard to tell what was something in the texture and what was an actual object worth investigating.

This list isn't at all exhaustive, and I'm sure none of it is new by now.

 

[mugarod]

I expect Ag.ru to give a fair review. They usually do to most games. Oblivion scored 79 from them and wasnt overpraised to much and generally most games dont really get high scores from them. Plus I havent seen a single game get over 90% in user reviews there in ages.

 

[DakaSha]

A few observations --

They said the game world is roughly the same size as Oblivion. Either they're lying or they've gone from "blah" to "fucking awesome" in the way the land is laid out. I just ran from Riverwood to Riften and it took goddamn forever.

Pros:
1. Character models are better than Oblivion's. You know I'm right. Are they perfect? No, but a big improvement over the Down's faces in Oblivion, and the Dunmer in particular look fantastic. They look like a high resolution version of what they were trying to accomplish in Morrowind.

2. More varied land features. Gone are hillsides littered with the same three grass-topped boulder models. Roots, stumps, all sorts of rocks, cairns, logs, dead trees, and all kinds of grasses make the landscape look much more natural.

3. Water. 'Nuff said.

4. Random shit in the world that will fuck your face if you're not prepared for it.

5. Wider selection of voice actors, though Lynda Carter's horribly miscast orc female voice in Oblivion will always come to mind every time I hear her. Thankfully, it's only been once.

Cons:

1. That pseudo-Swedish accent is starting to get old, and sounds more and more fake every time I hear it.

2. Dialogues are hackneyed. Some of the stuff NPCs say when you end a conversation has nothing to do with the topics discussed. It would have been better if they left farewells to just "Farewell" or even simply "Goodbye".

3. Spazzing, vibrating shadows.

4. Animations range from servicable to "HAHAHA!! Oh wow!"

5. Did I mention Lynda Carter?

6. Texturing overload. Sometimes, packing a bunch of detail into an enclosed space can flip the signal to noise ratio into the negative. Several times, I skipped looking for crap laying around because it was hard to tell what was something in the texture and what was an actual object worth investigating.

This list isn't at all exhaustive, and I'm sure none of it is new by now.

ok.. so what about the gameplay?

 

[tehRPness]

I understand the curiosity to see if the game is as bad as people say, but seriously. Don't reward Bethesda with your hard-earned money for this piece of shit with its 256 .bmp textures and interface design that was outdated TWENTY FUCKING YEARS AGO.

 

[BLOBERT]

BROS LOLLOLLOL AT YOU PCTARDS WHO PLAY THIS TRASH I AM ENJOYING DARK SOULS

 

[DakaSha]

getting that when its used at faggotstop

 

[Mastermind]

Also, the GDR never created actual Socialism, just party-controlled state capitalism.

I don't think you understand what capitalism means.

 

[BLOBERT]

BRO NOT TRUE SOMETIMES YOU CAN HAVE TIGHTLY REGULATED CAPITALISM THAT RELIES ON MONOPOLIES RUN BY THE STATE

SORT OF LIKE A DEMOCRACY THAT RELIES ON EXECUTION OF DISSIDENTS AND OUTLAWING ANYONE NOT OF THE RULING PARTY

OR FREEDOM OF SPEECH WITHIN GOVERNMENT CONTROLLED NEWSPAPERS AND ANYONE ELSE GETS BEAT TO DEATH

 

[attackfighter]

A few observations --

They said the game world is roughly the same size as Oblivion. Either they're lying or they've gone from "blah" to "fucking awesome" in the way the land is laid out. I just ran from Riverwood to Riften and it took goddamn forever.

What a coincidence, one of the first things I did in the game was decide to go to Riften. By the end of the EPIC journey I was all

 

[Barrow_Bug]

I'm really having fun with it, but all these 10/10 reviews are just horrible. Eurogamer has done it too. And I sometimes have faith in them. Well, no more.

But TBH Bros, the UI isn't a big deal.

To a consoletard like moi.

 

[tehRPness]

I'm really having fun with it, but all these 10/10 reviews are just horrible. Eurogamer has done it too. And I sometimes have faith in them. Well, no more.

But TBH Bros, the UI isn't a big deal.

To a consoletard like moi.

Having a PC UI on console works at least 'okay' - look at Morrowind. Having a console UI on a PC is horrible. It's like driving stick with one arm in a sling and the other one simply missing.

 

[Luzur]

yeah i keep changing hands all the time from mouse to keyboard just to navigate the goddamn menues.

 

[Ruprekt]

I don't think you understand what capitalism means.

You obviously don't even though the clues in the name capitalism.