Skyrim review scans

[Elim]

This was so obvious.

 

[sah]

When writing a review you have to consider its primary audience. The average reader of a gaming mag will not notice Skyrim's faults anyway. 95% is the perfect score for the 95% of gamers. At least until the next ES or Fallout game is promised and a new generetion of consoles rolls out.

 

[thesoup]

Ok, codex. One codexer has to get skyrim and make a plinkett style detailed video review. There is so much troll and butthurt opportunity in this. Don't fail me on this.

 

[MetalCraze]

One codexer? It will be a best seller here

 

[Multi-headed Cow]

Skyrim won't have enough bad things in it to do a Plinkett review.

 

[HatTrick]

Just raid Metacritic with /v/ like you folks always do. Might get some good reactions out of the Toddler.

 

[d1r]

Probably waiting for more serious reviews.

Besides that, Graphics: 92. Yeah, right ...

 

[Twinkle]

I wonder why the ability to get instakilled is used like an indication of game's quality by some here?

There is nothing wrong when a game punishes you harshly for being unprepared or stupid, in fact I prefer high damage and low hp bar over boring attrition battles. However, next-gen *difficulty* is just about giving retarded bots one million hps and godlike resists. In Oblivion f.e. a generic zombies could withstand dozens of power attacks or fireballs, yet was able to kill a player in two-three hits. There is no challenge or fun in this whatsoever, it just prompts players to utilize one of the myriad exploits.

 

[Clockwork Knight]

Stopped reading here.

What the fuck does that even mean? sounds like he wanted to say "most awesome RPG ever", but thought about sounding more professional.

You can get one shotted by powerful enemies in Oblivion too.

Where? I didn't play Oblivion much, but I don't remember any strong enemies.

Nearly every NPC and creature becomes stronger as you level, because of the scaling. You level as you increase your major skills. If you do natural thing and choose the skills you'll use frequently as majors, you'll level at breakneck speed, but with only a few actual increases in skill points. Therefore it's possible to be at a high level but not be very stong, or be a low-level-high-stats character ruling over a land of low-level-low-stats enemies.

So, if you are at a high level but you have shitty stats, even goblins will be having fun kicking you around.

 

[Trash]

There is a new vid out there which has a slightly less tarded player. He also fights a dragon and holy fuck, is that bad. Crap animations and as soon as it has landed you have this big almost immobile beast just sitting there shooting out flames every few seconds and getting hit in between.

I mean, if you do have EPIC dragon combat make the fucking lizards more agile, run after you, toss you around and slap you with their tails and claws. You know, make them the big scary fuckers from legend. Not having them sit there like some invalid waiting to die. Fucking hell.

And when is Bethesda going to get some decent animators? You think they would be able to afford them by now.

 

[meanwhileInPoland]

ffs that fucker didnt like morrowind but loved fallout 3? whats wrong with todays journalists? are they retarded or what?

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

ffs that fucker didnt like morrowind but loved fallout 3? whats wrong with todays journalists? are they retarded or what?

They are paid by devs to create an illusion that the quality of games only goes up, and that older games always pale in comparison to new.

So in short, they're two dollar whores.

 

[Jack]

I guess dragons are pretty majestic animals and Skyrim does feature an infinite number of them...

 

[Rivmusique]

At least each dungeon is unique - there's no cookie-cutter effect that many other games suffer from

A polite way of saying "Don't worry guys, they didn't try to pull that shit Oblivion did." ?

Also,

Combat abounds with a seemingly never-ending tide of undead bursting their way from coffins every five minutes

This is supposed to be a good thing? In a game where combat consists of Block > Swing > Swing repeat for melee and Backpeddle-while-blasting-with-arrows/fireballs for ranged? Bloody hell...

 

[Comrade Goby]

if it really is like new vegas ill buy and play. ive already seen footage of dudes getting one shotted by trolls and giants, which is a huge improvement over oblivion already. if someone can show me some unique non scaled items that are placed ill def buy.

Unique items are apparently in the game. As well as quests you can only get from reading books or other actions like kill a farmer and someone hiring a hit ma nto kill you or some shit.

 

[Heresiarch]

Speaking of dragon fights, any good games with good dragon spanking?

The ones I know and have played are:
Baldur's Gate
Demon Stone

Shit I don't know anything else (no, both NWN doesn't count as dragons in it are just big fat lizards that can be killed by a single warrior)

 

[Comrade Goby]

There's definitely shadows on objects indoors, and the books do open them if you pick them up.

Also, cool little note about the houses you can buy, there's a book shelf that you can deposit books in and it automatically stacks and alphabetizes them for you

Fucking casual consoletards can't even alphabetize their own books.

Decline.

 

[Edward_R_Murrow]

The only part in the review that garners any kind of enthousiasm in me are the screenies showing off the mountainous terrain. I can see myself have fun traversing these.

The terrain looks like a great invitation to hike around and explore, but somehow I think that the mountainous geography could turn out to be a massive pain in the ass, given how characters in Gamebryo-driven Bethesda RPGs have a hard time traversing inclines. Anyone who has played Morrowind, Oblivion, Fallout 3, or New Vegas has probably experienced a situation in which they try to ascend some summit and find that they can go no higher because the incline is at a steeper angle than some arbitrary "too steep" value. It wasn't so much a problem in Morrowind, because you had levitation, but in other games it becomes a real pain that your character's ability of movement is less than the typical FPS player character (who can at least rocket/grenade jump), especially Fallout 3 with the 6-foot-high rubble piles that were totally impassable because Bethesda characters can't do anything but run and jump a little.

When you (only) make free-roam RPGs, you'd think that giving the player a lot of ways to roam around and traverse terrain would be a high priority...but that's Bethesda for you.

Speaking of dragon fights, any good games with good dragon spanking?

Can't really think of many either. Few engines can really capture what would make a dragon so dangerous, namely size and flight, so they end up being nothing but huge blobs of HP with high attack and armor rating, which is never really that dangerous to a smart player. BG2 compensated for this by loading dragons up with tons of powerful abilities that no actual pen and paper dragon would have, like being about to force-cast a Heal spell.

 

[Skittles]

Anyway, not exactly the kind of review to sell the game. For stuff like that an article like this works much better.

http://killscreendaily.com/articles/things-i-ate-skyrim

I nearly bit through the stem of my pipe.

 

[Forest Dweller]

There is a new vid out there which has a slightly less tarded player. He also fights a dragon and holy fuck, is that bad. Crap animations and as soon as it has landed you have this big almost immobile beast just sitting there shooting out flames every few seconds and getting hit in between.

Link?

 

[7hm]

Remember when you used to have RPG gamers review RPG games and strategy gamers review strategy games and sports gamers review... etc.

Who cares what this guy thinks about the game? He doesn't like the genre. It's like asking someone who doesn't like horror movies to review a particular horror movie. If the reader likes horror movies, the review is meaningless to him, no matter the conclusion. And if he doesn't, why even bother reading it.

(I stopped reading after the reviewer said that, as his conclusions are meaningless to me. Plus the fact mainstream reviews are paid for. Games journalism is as bankrupt of professional ethics as sports journalism.)

 

[Stinger]

Mainstream game reviews are useless and the early reviews are even more useless. That said, the derp in this review (id software, 'Majestic RPG' etc) is pretty hilarious.

 

[Wyrmlord]

Stopped reading here.

What the fuck does that even mean? sounds like he wanted to say "most awesome RPG ever", but thought about sounding more professional.

This videogame is the most awesome creation ever made.

And no, I do not mean awesome in the way my teenage daughter would say it.

But I say it in the sense of something so biblical in portions, it can only make you prostrate in awe.

And that awe comes from its blinding royal and divine majesty.

...

I am trying to put in words what the sense or reason may have been in using majesty instead of plain "awesome". That's my imperfect approximation of what they may have been thinking, in all seriousness.

 

[Barrow_Bug]

http://ompldr.org/vYjViMg/skyrim.html

The end part with the Bro talking about how the true sons of Skyrim want to kick out the imperials and all the elves (grimdark) is kinda cool. So, the Skyrimians are basically rascist nords.



And fuck this game for making me care.

 

[waywardOne]

It still looks and feels like Oblivion 2.1, which is not the incentive Bethesda must think it is.