Your best fuck-ups

[Demnogonis Saastuttaja]

Sometimes it's the die, or unfair GM, but more often than not the players just do really dumb - but also really amusing - stuff. So what are your best fuck-ups?

So I have this habit of not paying attention.

Once in a Sci-Fi game called Heimot (Tribes, dunno if it has been translated into english) I shot a little girl with a high-powered handgun, in the back, because she stole something from me. What I didn't understand was that we were not in fact in some dark corridor (it was a space station) but in a middle of a busy marketplace. So the space yakuzas shot me out of an airlock. And I had made the character 15 minutes earlier.

Just yesterday we were playing D&D Eberron, we are hunting some giant artifacts and one of them is located underwater. So we had to pay one Sahuagin tribe to get passage, then we run into another that apparently the DM told us lived in the ruins we were trying to get in to. Well I didn't listen to that part. They asked us for slaves to get passage, and I thought fuck it, I'm bored with the constant negotiations especially since none of us has any speech skills, so I shot the Sahuagin. So the pirate captain tells us it's too dangerous to be in the area now, so I tell him he's a pussy and so they dump us in the Drow territory where humans aren't allowed into and we know nothing about. Also before that my last character almost brought war to the only human settlement in the area because we murdered a Drow patrol and set alight some villages crops so that we could steal their giant dragonshard. He was chaotic good by the way. The new one started neutral but changed in to evil because he just casually agreed to an assassination job among other things. Apparently I can't play decent people for shit.

In this Dark Ages Vampire game I told some noble in Jerusalem that we were agents of the Pope. With me being an Armenian Setite, another guy this nomad and the lie being stupid in general, the difficulty for the bluff was maybe 9 or something. I count that as a fuck-up even though my outrageous lying skill still made the guy swallow it. That was so fucking dumb, though nothing out of ordinary for me I suppose.

 

[Baron]

A running battle in Underdark. I was blinded by some sucker covered tentacle creature and down to a couple of hit points. Separated from my party and feeling a little Jack Burton I blurted out, "I'll splash water into my eyes from the stream!"
The DM looked impressed.
"OOooooh!" he cooed, and reached for a folder, "An Encounter from the Water table."

 

[Mother Russia]

You were playing a vampire...why not just kill the noble and suck him dry?

 

[Fafnir]

I was playing a swedish Cyber-punk game called Neotech. The game pretty much took place in the Cyberpunk 2010 setting.I'm playing Yakuza member whom is awesome at martial arts and we had just finished a mission and went to a club to let of some steam. I went dancing on some hover floor and I try to pick up on a supermodel whom is there. I botch my seduction roll. Her bodyguards comes to kick my ass. So I make a brilliant plan of jumping to the other hovering floor that passes us. I botch my roll to jump and I plummet to my death killing our "boss" whom was having an meeting with my comrades making my former allies hunted and thus ended the campaign.

 

[Demnogonis Saastuttaja]

You were playing a vampire...why not just kill the noble and suck him dry?

The noble was important to our efforts.

 

[Fafnir]

You were playing a vampire...why not just kill the noble and suck him dry?

The noble was important to our efforts.

You should have stalked him found out his darkest secrets. Or just "made" up evidence of Buggery and wham black mail him.

 

[Telengard]

Because I haven't been a player much, I don't have many of my own fuck-ups. My personal greatest occurred because the GM was using a map and some basic 3d constructs for a fight, and he placed some rocks down that were taller than the figurines and I assumed (wrongly) that that meant the rocks were all actually taller than a person. So, I dutifully had everyone line up their characters between the rocks, thinking that we would thus be fully protected from being flanked. And the GM proceeded to run the enemies up on top of the rocks, giving them all higher ground bonuses on everyone, as well as being able to reach the people we were supposed to be protecting inside, since they could also easily walk down the rocks and right into the center of the group.

The absolute worst, though, was one I only bore witness to, with me as a GM playing a module. There was a long drop-floor pit trap that, when sprung, also filled the area with a pink fog cloud (harmless). As well, the pit was filled with bones and a single skeleton. Keep in mind the group was lvl 5-7. Because no one was paying attention, they hit the trap dead-on, and half got dropped into the pit (which would be 3 characters). They were a little banged up from earlier encounters, but not badly so, and the pit barely did anything. However, they proceeded to panic. The people above retreated out of the cloud and refused go back in to help. They being the only ones with rope. (Okay, I didn't help matters by constantly making them roll for the "effects" of the fog.) The people below, standing in bones, and hearing a creature coming towards them, but unable to see it, freaked. They ran to the wall and tried to climb out individually. One of them was a rogue, and made it. The other two failed, and began to be attacked by the skeleton (keep in mind that they're levels 5-7). The rogue ran out of the mist, joining the others above in doing nothing else. Round after round, then, the two people in the pit struggled to get out, failing, while the skeleton mostly missed them, but occasionally hit, slowly killing them. Slowly.

Eventually, almost dead, in desperation, it was decided that one would climb on the shoulders of the other and climb out, and then would hoist the other up. But just as the person climbed onto the other's shoulders, the person below got hit by the skeleton again, for enough damage to slay him. I allowed the person climbing out to jump from the dying body of his comrade, giving him a roll for grabbing the edge of the pit. Which he made, and then proceeded to climb out.

End of encounter.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Your fuck ups as a GM can be equally bad, if only because you have gazillions of rape planned for the hapless players, when suddenly you realise you forgot about a couple of silly details that make the rape completely negligible.

Case in point, for the Dark Heresy season finale, I've devised an encounter with a cybernetic Greater Daemon of Nurgle, heavily augmented and bound by heretek science. I was giggling in anticipation of the coming rape when they entered the 'hangar' in which it was kept...

When suddenly it became apparent that like 3 out of 5 of the players are Fearless, which completely negated the WP-30 fear roll the daemon caused upon encountering. Then it turned out that one of them was a daemonhunter - I was aware of this fact, but I had no bleedin' idea how downright friggin OP this thing was against daemons, even greater ones. While all the other blokes rushed for conveniently placed lascannons and kept barraging the daemon, the daemonhunter guy just ran up to it and started clubbing it in the knee only to keep it tied in melee combat - because of this it couldn't unleash horrible rape of various kinds upon the other party members. It couldn't unleash rape upon the daemonhunter either because:

1. He had horribly powergamed agility, making his dodge rolls spiral to the stratosphere.
2. HE HAD AN INHERENT ANTI-DAEMON FORCEFIELD
3. SOME OTHER OP SHIT THAT I EVEN FORGOT ABOUT

In the end, the encounter finished with 0 damage taken by ANYONE, and one guy getting 1 insanity point from a fear roll. That was a cyber great unclean one, with lascannon eyebeams, massive plague blades, clouds of flies, cool bionics and a fuckton of HP bloat. Hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

 

[Excidium]

Was reminiscent of the Gothic/Risen final boss fights.

 

[Ulminati]

Many many years ago we were playing some variant of 3.x. The GM had dragged in weird rules from all over the place and all official 3.x core/source/splatbooks were allowed. One of the weirder rules was some addition to critical hits. Namely if you rolled a natural 20 and confirmed it with another natural 20 you rolled to confirm it again. IF the second confirmation also passed AC your attack was a possible instant kill following the standard rules for death by massive damage.

Anyway I was taking a break from my usual typecast role as the "sneaky bastard" rogue/ranger/ninja/whathaveyou and were playing Halgrimm the Barbarian. As stereotypical as they get and eternally at odds with another players character, Treach the Psionicist. Treach would often belittle Halgrimm, pointing out that while Halgrimm was sweating, grunting and receiving blows to the head that made him even dumber, Treach was "killing things.... with my mind!"

The campaign dragged on and eventually we found ourselves far outclassed, fighting a devil of some sort. The devil got a regular crit in and our GM, us being teenagers and somewhat obsessed with gore back then vividly described how the top of Halgrimms skull was cut open and people could spy grey matter peeking out. The following conversation went a bit like this:

Me: "Well... Fuck it. Can Halgrimm reach into his head and throw his brain at the devil as an improvised thrown weapon?"
GM : "Er... Why the fuck would you want to do that?"
Me: "Look, I'm at 1 hp, the entire party except me is ranged. Our cleric lies decomposing in the bottom of the acid trap we stumbled into earlier. If Halgrimms gotta go he wants to make one last definat gesture."
GM : "Er... I suppose there's nothing stopping you. Although he's gotta pass a fortitude save to make it through the throwing motion before dropping stone dead"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Me: "With modifiers, that's a 29. Good enough?"
GM : "It'll do. Make your attack roll."
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 1.
Me: "Shoo... I guess it misses"
GM : "Let's assume it's a thrown grenade weapon and roll a scatter"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
GM : "Huh... It scatters into Treach's square. Give me a new attack roll"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 20
Treach: "Er... Ouch?"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 20
Treach: "WTF!?"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
18
Me: "With modifiers that's 25. I think that's a massive damage crit."
Treach: "You... You killed me!?"
Me, nodding sagely: "...With my mind."

 

[Destroid]

Your fuck ups as a GM can be equally bad, if only because you have gazillions of rape planned for the hapless players, when suddenly you realise you forgot about a couple of silly details that make the rape completely negligible.

Case in point, for the Dark Heresy season finale, I've devised an encounter with a cybernetic Greater Daemon of Nurgle, heavily augmented and bound by heretek science. I was giggling in anticipation of the coming rape when they entered the 'hangar' in which it was kept...

When suddenly it became apparent that like 3 out of 5 of the players are Fearless, which completely negated the WP-30 fear roll the daemon caused upon encountering. Then it turned out that one of them was a daemonhunter - I was aware of this fact, but I had no bleedin' idea how downright friggin OP this thing was against daemons, even greater ones. While all the other blokes rushed for conveniently placed lascannons and kept barraging the daemon, the daemonhunter guy just ran up to it and started clubbing it in the knee only to keep it tied in melee combat - because of this it couldn't unleash horrible rape of various kinds upon the other party members. It couldn't unleash rape upon the daemonhunter either because:

1. He had horribly powergamed agility, making his dodge rolls spiral to the stratosphere.
2. HE HAD AN INHERENT ANTI-DAEMON FORCEFIELD
3. SOME OTHER OP SHIT THAT I EVEN FORGOT ABOUT

In the end, the encounter finished with 0 damage taken by ANYONE, and one guy getting 1 insanity point from a fear roll. That was a cyber great unclean one, with lascannon eyebeams, massive plague blades, clouds of flies, cool bionics and a fuckton of HP bloat. Hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Bro, you are the GM, if shits too easy you fix it on the fly. Spawn in a squad of Khorne berserkers or something.

 

[Darth Roxor]

choices and consequences, BITCH

 

[Misconnected]

Homebrew Modern Day with Monsters setting. It was a dark and stormy night. The lair of the hideous fey monster, a multi-million dollar mansion overhanging the sheer cliffs of the desolate coastline. Our party had spent weeks and significant resources learning how to infiltrate the damn place, and finally, we were in. Catching the villain entirely by surprise, we quickly pinned the fucker with purpose-built cold-iron mancatchers and started interrogating it. Like all its kind, though, this monster was a smooth, smooth talker, and convinced us that it would surrender and confess in full if only we'd stop hurting it [the NPC out-social-skilled us].

The fey was unarmed and at least slightly battered, and really didn't seem in any position to threaten us. Still, we were half-expecting an attack. And attack it did. By sitting down behind a table, appearing to relax, partially confessing, and then kicking the table at us. And while we positioned ourselves, dodged flying furniture and whatnot, the slippery fuck defenestrated itself. Literally, it threw itself out the nearest window.

My char was closest. Close enough to react. So he threw himself out the window after the fey, managing to grab one of its feet.

It was sometime in the middle of an opposed roll to see if my char could hold on to the fey's foot it dawned on me that it had been an ocean side window. It was the hushed silence around the table that tipped me off: I'd just hurled my char through a window and off 150ft cliff. But at least I'd managed to hold on to the fey.

Being a vicious fuck of a player, I naturally wanted to grab on tight to the fey and try to land on it. Not that it could possibly save my character, but at least it would almost certainly kill the fey. Unfortunately, my character didn't oblige. The poor bastard, finally realising his doom, panicked and let go of the fey to better futilely flail his limbs.

The fall maimed the fey, but not so severely it couldn't escape before the rest of the party could catch up.

I prefer to think my character died for the arts. He managed to miss the ocean by a few feet, and painted the jagged rocks a pretty red.

....

Not quite as stupid, but kind of epic in its mundaneness: we were playing an old-school crawl. The kind of game where players and GM agree to a very narrow interpretation of the rules, and the GM then tries his best to kill the PCs while the players try their best to make off with the McGuffin (or at least a decent pile of loot) without getting killed.

Over the entrance to the long and unlit passage our party was moving down, there'd been a sign saying something like "greed is a deadly sin" (though far more eloquently). Our rogue had spotted some type of mechanism at the entrance, but it didn't appear to be a trap and had done absolutely nothing. Still, when our rogue found a bag of gold coins barely concealed in the passage, we ended up deciding to leave it for safety's sake. And while we were debating it, my wizard character took the opportunity to borrow a waterskin from one of the fighters [my char was extremely frail and suffering fatigue]. He was really a very nice guy, the fighter. He not only let me my char keep the waterskin, he'd been doing bodyguard duty for my char the whole way. I should say the GM appeared to be struggling to suppress an evil giggle at this point, but we kind of assumed it was an attempt at reverse psychology to make us pick up the gold.

Anyway, as we were about to exit the passage into a surprisingly large and nice-looking chamber, the rogue spotted another mechanism. This time she was convinced that it was indeed a trap, but she'd fallen out of favour with the dice gods and couldn't determine anything beyond "I'm sure there's a trap here, I feel it in my gut". After a bit of discussion, we decided to tie a rope around the biggest, meanest fighter and send him forth. The idea being that be was the least likely to be instantly killed, and that we'd be able to haul him to safety if, say, the floor collapsed.

He made it into the room without setting off any traps. As did the thief, and the cleric. At which point we were sure the rogue had imagined the whole thing, and my char stepped boldly forth.

That's when the passage collapsed at both ends. Not that the far end was of any particular concern to my char. I failed my dodge and my char was crushed to death instantly. But it turns out the mechanisms were scales rigged to measure the weight of all who passed them, and collapse the entries to the passage if anyone gained more than a pound or so during their trip down the passage. What the GM had been giggling over earlier wasn't anything to do with the gold. No, it was the damn waterskin my char borrowed from the very nice fighter. Who, by the way, unfortunately did make his dodge. Unfortunately, because with him being behind my char and both ends of the passage collapsed, he was trapped and managed to die from oxygen deprivation before the party could dig him out.

 

[lightbane]

Homebrew Modern Day with Monsters setting...

Sounds like it was taken from Changeling: The Lost. Which system are you using? It sounds interesting.

 

[Misconnected]

Sounds like it was taken from Changeling: The Lost. Which system are you using? It sounds interesting.

Yeah. The setting wasn't actually derived from Changeling, but it might as well have been. If you're curious though, the initial inspiration for the setting were a couple of really, really bad pulp novels about a werewolf in an alt-fantasy-history World War II setting. Sadly the names & author escapes me at the moment, but I wholeheartedly recommend them. They're so ridiculously bad they're good.

As for the system, I'm afraid it's nothing you can get a hold of. At least not in the immediate future. Many, many years ago the people I played with abandoned AD&D in favour of WFRP, and from there moved on to CoC. Unfortunately, while we liked certain things about all of them, we didn't really like any one of them. So at some point our ever-growing pile of houserules kind of evolved into a stand-alone system, and it's just kept evolving over many years and different gaming groups. Presently it's probably most similar to D6 Star Wars, but although it clearly (at least to me) borrows from several systems, it is very much its own thing.

At some point I intend to re-design our realm/dynasty oriented stuff from the ground up, and when that happens I will seriously consider writing up the whole thing in a single rulebook in English. Don't worry, if it turns out I'm crazy enough to do it, it will be free. I'm not sure I am crazy enough to do it, though. The one constant of the system is that it has changed, often drastically, to suit the particular group of people playing with it. I don't suppose that necessarily makes it a heartbreaker, but I suspect it's a good indicator.

 

[CappenVarra]

Sounds like it was taken from Changeling: The Lost. Which system are you using? It sounds interesting.

Yeah. The setting wasn't actually derived from Changeling, but it might as well have been. If you're curious though, the initial inspiration for the setting were a couple of really, really bad pulp novels about a werewolf in an alt-fantasy-history World War II setting. Sadly the names & author escapes me at the moment, but I wholeheartedly recommend them. They're so ridiculously bad they're good.

Based on "a werewolf in an alt-fantasy-history WW2" I'd say Poul Anderson's Operation Chaos and the sequel, except it's Quality Shit (TM) so it doesn't match the "really bad pulp novels" part. Did it have a part where they killed a bacterial infection by having a guy with the Evil Eye look at them through a microscope? An enemy officer who was a were-tiger with only one eye (iirc)? A really stupid efreet which the female character convinced to go back into his djinn bottle by psychoanalysis and amplifying his fear of water?

 

[Awor Szurkrarz]

Awesome thread :D .

The other two failed, and began to be attacked by the skeleton (keep in mind that they're levels 5-7). The rogue ran out of the mist, joining the others above in doing nothing else. Round after round, then, the two people in the pit struggled to get out, failing, while the skeleton mostly missed them, but occasionally hit, slowly killing them. Slowly.

Awesome

Me: "Well... Fuck it. Can Halgrimm reach into his head and throw his brain at the devil as an improvised thrown weapon?"
GM : "Er... Why the fuck would you want to do that?"
Me: "Look, I'm at 1 hp, the entire party except me is ranged. Our cleric lies decomposing in the bottom of the acid trap we stumbled into earlier. If Halgrimms gotta go he wants to make one last definat gesture."
GM : "Er... I suppose there's nothing stopping you. Although he's gotta pass a fortitude save to make it through the throwing motion before dropping stone dead"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Me: "With modifiers, that's a 29. Good enough?"
GM : "It'll do. Make your attack roll."
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 1.
Me: "Shoo... I guess it misses"
GM : "Let's assume it's a thrown grenade weapon and roll a scatter"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
GM : "Huh... It scatters into Treach's square. Give me a new attack roll"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 20
Treach: "Er... Ouch?"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
Natural 20
Treach: "WTF!?"
*rattle* *rattle* *roll*
18
Me: "With modifiers that's 25. I think that's a massive damage crit."
Treach: "You... You killed me!?"
Me, nodding sagely: "...With my mind."

Oh my God !

 

[Father Walker]

Jesus, too many to count. We've got fuck-ups of various magnitude during our years of Vampire. Need to think about the most lulz-inducing moments, though.

 

[Fafnir]

I have another when I were playing Vampire Dark Ages I was sneaking up on my arch-nemesis when I fumble my sneak followed by a fumble on the dexterity/dodge test and step on a rake and got staked. It was a shitty campaign.

 

[Ulminati]

Not a fuck-up per se, but still kind of hilarious in a cruel way. The game was 3.5e Forgotten Realms. We were roaming around eastof Halruua. One of the parrty members was a barbarian spiked chain tripper run by the resident short-sighted munchkin. He had statted his guy out from lv1-20, each level optimized to give him maximum dps. To make sure he got maximum cheese his build allowed for very little deviation without falling apart at several key points.

The group had a raise dead scroll. As the only spellcaster, I was carrying the raise dead scroll. I am My character was neutral evil.

As it just so happened, we had an encounter go pear-shaped. The barbarian - who was actually a weird combination of 3-4 prestige classes - got himself killed. No problem. Hardline encounter design was why the DM gave us a raise dead scroll. My character assured everyone that as soon as we were out of danger and had some downtime, he would see that the barbarian got returned to the party.

My character knew a druid that owed him big favours. Druids can cast reincarnation.

Yes. Reincarnation.

GM rolled for new race while the barbarians player was sputtering. Dice came up "random monster from MM, GMs choice". GM decided to roll 3d100 to pick a page. The barbarian came back to us as a centaur.

Which put the munchkin in a peverse situation. His previous build was utterly wrecked because of level adjustment, size modifiers and what have you. But OTOH he just got access to a whole new kind of polearm cheese. So he couldn't bring himself to abandon the character.

Not only did it bring the characters cheese level in line with the rest of the party. He also became a continuous running joke whenever we entered a city. Especially when the entire party (being high-level enough that 15-20 gold was chump change) were sleeping in luxurious suites while the centaur was confined to the stables.

That was the last time I was ever appointed as responsible for tracking group loot

 

[deus101]

OK...Let's start with Dark Heresy.

This was at Arcon and we were playing a small 4 hour module.

We were a bunch of Inquisitors and I was the leader(seeing as i was a space sheriff or something can't remember the class).

Now someone jumped into our session in the last minute, and rolled his own character. Guy was a pretty well known alpha gamer and GM.

So...we were looking into a famine on a planet(good intentioned chaos plot which needed to be squished nr .342

Now...I was talking out of char about the emperor fluff, how he wasn't as xenophobic as the cult, etc(can't quite remember)... but it was fluff and out of char.

When they looked at me grinning i had to do the time out signal and point out..."FOR FUCK SAKE I'M AN INQUISITOR IM SPEAKING OUT OF CHAR".

Anyway...turns out the denizens of the planet used alien slave labor and i was inquiring to the tech priest about bombing the labor camps from space.
Despite that...I got labled as a xeno lover after I pointed out that we had more pressing matter then to go around massacre aliens.

Cue to an inn eating soup, the alpha gamer suddenly inquired me about hypoteticals...if it wasnt for the fact it was to obvious i would denounce him as an heretic.

Ok...bottom line comes down to this.

He cocks his hand like a gun...waits 3 seconds then he says "Bang you're dead".
I was a bit confused...and uttered some exclamations.

Then I say ok, lets get it on...but no...I WAS DEAD!...I turned to the GM...and I WAS DEAD! NOT A SINGLE DIE TOSSED!

I mean...HE KILLED AN PC WITH HIS FINGER! AND THE GM WAS CONTENT WITH THAT!


Still, were able to play as a henchman native to the planet....and got my revenge by lobbing a grenade while they were discussing exterminatus my home planet.

 

[Undead Phoenix]

My best fuck-up pales in comparison to the ones here - but it is still amusing in its own right. I've played the role of newly annointed Thief, in his first mission with a new party, get Dominated by the main enemy of the session - one that he'd specifically been hired to track down - with the first incling given to the party that their rogue isn't in possession his own mind by performing a critical sneak attack to the party leader.


But by far my finest hour comes from a game of Deathwatch. As the Techmarine of the group, and a Black Templar one at that, we come to the end of our mission of recovering a stranded Magos and his (itz?) special anti-Tyranid poison. You all know the drill - drop down, hunt for clues to the Magos' location, then extract. Simple - except for the artificial time limit introduced and escalating scale of gribblies to encounter.

The short is - we find the Magos in a partially covered bunker after some gruelling battles, pretty much all out of Fate points and definately in Critical Wound territories. My guy is a beast in melee, the servo-arm so much more devastating than a mere bolter and combat knife. What we find is basically a broken cyborg stuttering on one piece of binary code with the instructions to protect its magic xeno-juice. Being the techie, I try to do some hasty field repairs... which set off the Magos' defense protocals, and it shoots at me. It was armed with a hand-flamer, but I heard melta, so instinctively think "fuck" as it shaves off most of my few remaining wounds and try to grapple the cunt wih my servo-arm to stop it from turning me into a pile of molten slag. I fail my grapple check, badly, and the GM decided that I didn't miss - no - I crush the living shit out of the Magos... completely destroying it, not only failing the mission, but damning the system to the incoming Hive Fleet.

If I'd just spoke binary to the Magos, one of the main abilities of a Techmarine, I would have been able to aquire permission to do repairs. That simple. The line between suicide-mission and suicide-mission.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Simple - except for the artificial time limit introduced and escalating scale of gribblies to encounter.

ARTIFICIAL?

TYRANIDS ARE INVADING, ASSHOLE

THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER

(also we played the very same scenario for a while. We wasted all of our rockets on some completely useless mobs of termagants along the way... and then got ambushed by a mob of 6+ flying tyranid warriors and got horribly raped. Good times)

 

[Jaedar]

BRUDDA I AM HIT!

Also, we didn't get horribly raped. My dude was so munckined out he killed the shrikes with one hit iirc. Altho one of us wound up with critical wounds.

Let's see, My best fuckup. Probably deciding that we totally had a chance against 3 chaos space marines with our lasguns and stubbers(altho there have also been a few unfortunate daemon pacts but I think not taking them would have been worse). The marines were working on some stuff behind a door, so we make a trap out of several frag grenades and the krak grenade. Then we open the door, lure them out, and trigger the trap. So far everything according to plan.

Except: The trap does basically no damage, causing one of the corrupted astartes to maybe wonder what scratched him in the arm. Then the bolters start firing and the entire party goes down in two rounds.

 

[lightbane]

Curious, I too played the same scenario from Deathwatch (I was an EXTREME Dark Angel Techie), but the outcome was vastly different: Not only the party leader (an Ultrafagine that actually was a nice guy) managed to calm down the Magos, but I was able to "repair" part of his wounds and join with what was left of the IG.
The last scene was us, the Imperial Soldiers and the obligatory badass Comissar trying to hold off a swarm of Flying Warriors (which we survived, even though the Blood Angel Librarian rolled Perils invoking the Heart of Warp result, somehow no-one was affected) and that bigass Tyranid Alpha Warrior or whatever it was called. The result was that the monster was succesfully annihilated when my rocket launcher blew up part of its face, but the thing managed to cut off the Commissar's arms before dying. Thankfully he was a real bro and he survived. We completed the mission with excellent results


Now, for my fuck-up: I was playing Black Crusade (as a stereotypical Tzeench Sorcerer Chaos Marine), I had the brilliant idea of freeing a weakened Daemonhost in exchange of information about a treasure I was looking for. The daemon asked me for a new host before doing that, but I wasn't that dumb and I told him to wait, first we had to deal with the Inquisitor that ruled the ship. After a grueling battle, I went back to search for the treasure and betray my comrades check if it was the real deal, but the Daemonhost stood in the way, demanding me a body as I promised. I was feeling too proud and arrogant to think clearly so I tried to intimidate the daemon to GTFO, but the roll failed horribly.
The daemon attempted to mindrape and posses my psyker, but luckily my char's willpower was high enough to win the contest. Then he tried to kill my guy, my character would have lost the battle today... If it wasn't because Tzeench is the Greatest Troll: The daemon rolled Perils, especifically the "Be possessed by a daemon" effect As that was not possible, the GM rerolled, getting the "Blood Rain" instead.

After that, the "fight" was me attempting to hit the demon but failing to do so due my character's wounds (plus the slippery floor) and the 'host using more powers with increasingly catastrophic results for both of us. Eventually he attempted to flee (as we two were with critical damage after failing all the time, at least he suffered more damage than I did) but my Marine took out his bolt pistol and blew up his head.The worst part was that the treasure was actually a fake (and bobby-trapped to boot), my character was nearly killed, again. But he somehow survived, he was at Crit. 5 by the end of the adventure