Crispy™ A Call For Peace -- Zarniwoop doesn't really like this thread title

[ThisNameIsFree]

So THE MODS been taking references for their joke from this?

Best joke ever

So this black jewish homosexual nazi mexican kkk member walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "Get him!"

Everyone sprints madly in his direction. One guy starts punching him in the face repeatedly while another guy gets a crowbar hoping he might get the chance to gouge out his eyes. Everyone's screaming and stomping on his limbs while he says, "No, please, stop!"

The bar mates explain, "You deserve this kind of treatment, because you're a black jewish homosexual nazi mexican kkk member, and that's everything we hate, all in one! profusely!

And people are running into the bar in troves, all to join in hurting him.

So they continue to stomp on his limbs and bash his face in and scream profanities at him and choke him while he sobs and sobs.

[insert graphic descriptions of torture here]

Then the whole world joins into the effort to try to find new ways to punish him more. The whole world becomes focused on making him feel more anguish and suffering.

They're all like, "There's no way to make him feel more pain!"

So they make a pain machine and put him in it. The scientists spend years developing it, and when they're complete they shove him in and turn it on. It keeps him conscious while making him feel the essence of anguish.

And then they're like, "This isn't good enough yet!"

They set out to build another machine.

So they're spending years making this machine, right? And it's taking a while, but luckily, they can make him feel anguish and suffering extremely until then.

Then when he almost dies, they find world renowned, "Dr. Fred" who says, "I'll make sure he stays alive." So he does.

And they're like, "Wait, what was his name?"

"Oh, he doesn't deserve one. He deserves the opposite of a name, even, because he's so worthy of being hated and tortured."

"I know," says one guy, "We'll call him anti-name, so that we can refer to him, to organize this world effort to jam more suffering into his existence, but make it clear he deserves the opposite of a name. He's not just worse than a dog, he's the opposite of something.

Decades pass, and the whole world is busy forcing more suffering into him when all of a sudden, they complete the suffer-meister, mark 2.

They turn that on, and it makes all the suffering in the world go to him instead. Everyone's happy and having a great time, and it's like Buddhism, because since everyone else is experiencing great joy and pleasure, he's getting the sadness they would have endured.

All the religious people pray that he'll undergo more torture, and wiccans are casting spells to make it happen, and voodoo people are cutting chickens heads off and going ooga booga, and jews and the neo-nazis and the black panthers and the mexicans, and the kkk, and everyone who's represented in the stuff why he was hated at the start of the joke join in, ironically, but since he's all of them at once, that's different. They all decide to unite to hurt him. And they all agree that's the right thing to do and they shake each other's hands and decide to cooperate.

And everyone said in unison, "This makes a lot of sense why we're doing this."

So they get Psychologist "Dr. Bob" to convince anti-name to torture himself, screaming, "I deserve this! I deserve this!"

Now since they got him torturing himself, they're like "Is he now getting what he wants?"

Dr. Bob makes sure the anti-name's hurting of himself continues while bringing him back somehow to "please stop," because that means that he's not enjoying being in on it too... he hates that he's hurting himself, but he's doing it anyway, because of the psychologists. This all increases his anguish.

They make sure he doesn't die, because then he'd go to hell, which would be like a breath of fresh air when compared to the suffering he's undergoing.

So they build the Suffer-meister machine mark 3, and turn that on, and it speeds up time to cram more pain, suffering, and anguish into his soul, and gather all the anguish from the past too. He experiences all the suffering of eternity forever.

in fact, all the pain that ever happened get's jammed into him instead and erased from history when it happened originally, so he can experience it instead.

And he never gets used to it, ever, because that's one of the functions of the machine. Every moment is like the first moment of suffering, while still leaving the memory of the suffering before it.

So the whole universe focuses all of it's hate on him in every way, and every human, animal, and alien screams, "SUFFER! SUFFER! SUFFER! You deserve this! SUFFER!"

It all started when he went into that bar. All anti-name wanted was a cold heady ale, but he would have been willing to settle for the house draft.

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/The_best_joke_ever

Both parties full of shit tbh.

 

[thesoup]

I wasn't sure how that was funny let alone the best joke ever, moreso since it came from unfunnypedia. Then I read the beginning of the post again, specifically the part where you ask if this is where the mods get their humor and it made sense. Well played.
I wouldn't be surprised if mods had unfunnypedia as their start page.

 

[Lady_Error]

It helps to read this thread with this background music:

Nah. This:

 

[Kalin]

RPG Cuckdex

>We have such sights to show you

Undisputed home of snazzy, shilling reviews, ads and retrospectives of classic hardcore old skool retro goodness!

MCA, Obshitian, Beamdawg, Gayder, Fallout 5, Undertale, Sawyer says!, Zombie Abortion Simulators, kawaii animu avatars and much, much more!

Fully certified by NAMBLA, IGN and the Anti-Defamation League. RPG Cuckdex - a true bastion of modernity.

No nazis allowed!


Sponsored by Valve, Mountain Dew and Omniventures Inc.

 

[Prime Junta]

hay guise i have joke too

what's brown and goes cuck cuck cuck?

Spoiler

chicken of course lol

 

[agentorange]

 

[Corporate_Jew_Master]

classic

 

[an Administrator]

Only a duel between idhtftc and jcd can end this war.
Fedora vs Kang

 

[thesoup]

Only a duel between idhtftc and jcd can end this war.
Fedora vs Kang

Always bet on neanderthal.

 

[mondblut]

The only people complaining are the retards whose posts consist only of shitty racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts. Let them cry and let's move on.

First they came for racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts...

 

[I'm Big Into Anal]

whats so civil about war anyway

 

[Scruffy]

The only people complaining are the retards whose posts consist only of shitty racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts. Let them cry and let's move on.

First they came for racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts...

again, i know reading comprehension is hard, but:

no one is censoring anything. the fake sub-forum is gone. there is no purge, no censorship, nothing at all.

now go back to play with your friends, and don't forget your helmet and elbow guards

 

[King Crispy]

There's really no need to insult mondblut like that. He is a pillar of this community, one whose presence and contributions are appreciated far more than some...

 

[Mustawd]

The only people complaining are the retards whose posts consist only of shitty racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts. Let them cry and let's move on.

First they came for racist vignettes and "hurr niggers" posts...

again, i know reading comprehension is hard, but:

no one is censoring anything. the fake sub-forum is gone. there is no purge, no censorship, nothing at all.

now go back to play with your friends, and don't forget your helmet and elbow guards

Yah, it was all a prank guise. Jeez.

 

[Scruffy]

There's really no need to insult mondblut like that. He is a pillar of this community, one whose presence and contributions are appreciated far more than some...

they'll hang you even if you pretend to be their friend
only you'll look sillier than the rest of those hanging

 

[mondblut]

There's really no need to insult mondblut like that. He is a pillar of this community, one whose presence and contributions are appreciated far more than some...

It takes more than a backpedaling SJW in training to insult mondblut But thanks anyway.

 

[King Crispy]

they'll hang you even if you pretend to be their friend

What you don't seem to understand is that I'm already dead.

 

[an Administrator]

Forget the civil war....
What happened to crispy?!

 

[Burning Bridges]

We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our freedom whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills;
we shall never surrender

 

[Burning Bridges]

Forget the civil war....
What happened to crispy?!

Afaik staff always treat him like a doormat, I have no clue why he puts up with it.

 

[King Crispy]

Harsh but ultimately not completely inaccurate.

 

[Burning Bridges]

Man the fuck up.

Can you tell me what's the point of this thread? Do you think grammar school level jokes is going to change the fact that the active staff now consists of newfags who boast behind our backs about their exploits?

This site goes to the shitter since ca 2012, when people like Jason dissappeared and were replaced by this new posse. If I was you I would seriously look out for an alternative, and exchange email adresses while you can.

 

[King Crispy]

You seem upset.

 

[varangos]

This site goes to the shitter since ca 2012 all the gamergate retards found about the codex,

Fixed

 

[fizzelopeguss]

I'll mod pol. Too many poofters, yids, women and slav-shit on this board already.

Once again the Anglo is required to bring hot lead, cold steel and enlightenment to the savage and unruly places of the world.

 

[Mustawd]

^Didn't they all die in the end? Lol