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Alpha Protocol sucks massive Multi-Headed Dick
- Thread starter 1eyedking
- Start date
MasterSmithFandango
Arcane
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2008
- Messages
- 7,269
People can't into PCs: "If it doesn't happen on my copy, it's not a real problem PIRATES!!!"
And the main issues with this piece of shitty shittiness aren't even the retarded technical issues, but rather the horrid gameplay, banal story, retarded characters, QTE dialogue, and palette swapping C&C.
And the main issues with this piece of shitty shittiness aren't even the retarded technical issues, but rather the horrid gameplay, banal story, retarded characters, QTE dialogue, and palette swapping C&C.
Silellak
Cipher
Yeah, I was gonna say, harping on Alpha Protocol for its technical issues is like harping on Oblivion because of its overuse of bloom. Sure, it might be legitimate criticism - but there are bigger fish to fry.Flying Spaghetti Monster said:
Flying Spaghetti Monster said:
People can't into PCs: "If it happens on my copy, it's a general problem with the game FANBOIS!!!"
lefthandblack
Arcane
I found this in a bargain bin and decided to pick it up despite all the bad press it got. I know that some people here liked it, so I thought that it must have some redeeming qualities. I'm on the last leg of Saudi Arabia and I am about ready to uninstall it and use the dvd for target practice. I've read that it gets somewhat better after Saudi before going to hell again at the end.
From what I've seen so far you have:
- retarded dialogue system
What the fuck did you just say? Sorry, I was busy trying to read my response options and couldn't pay attention because there is A FUCKING TIMER in the dialog system. This doesn't add IMMERSHUN, if anything it takes away from it because I'm not paying attention to what is being said.
- annoying-ass minigames that range from so easy that they might as well not be there (lockpicking) to rage inducing (hacking)
Let's see............ A17DE0Y.......FUCK! MY EYES! Yeah, I know about the EMP thing, but unless you're going to carry a bunch of them around all the time you are still going to have to put up with this far too often. The bypass minigame is passable (lol) but I've read that later there are sections where the number of circuits reach insane levels which leads me to believe that this game may indeed be destined for a date with my 12 guage.
- linear levels complete with sections blocked off by 3ft crates
I actually re-enabled the "jump" command via the ini's which let me bypass a whole section of one level and was glad for it.
- security cameras pointed at a steep angle towards the ground complete with DON'T WALK HERE lightshafts
Those terrorists should fire their security contractor; must have been Halibur......... I mean Haltech.
- scripted enemies that teleport right on top of you when you trigger an alarm and go back to picking their nose once you disable it. Never mind the fact that you can empty an assault rifle mag into somebody and enemies 100 feet away don't seem to notice.
- In one section you have to wait for the games scripts to trigger the obvious escape route before you can use it to make your DRAMATIC ESCAPE.
Seriously, WTF. I know that I am going to have to jump off of this catwalk to run to the helicopter, but you can only jump off where "X marks the spot" and "X" isn't there until the scripts run their course just so you can run to the helicopter while people shoot at you, as opposed to running to the helicopter 30 seconds ago when everyone was dead.
- disappearing corpses FTW
Why not add a corpse-hiding mechanic in favor of one of your retarded minigames like Thief and Nolf did, OVER TEN YEARS AGO.
- FUCK YOUR GODDAMN CHECKPOINTS
I was hopeful when I found the quicksave command in one of the ini's, but re-enabling it doesn't do anything sadly.
Does it get any better?
From what I've seen so far you have:
- retarded dialogue system
What the fuck did you just say? Sorry, I was busy trying to read my response options and couldn't pay attention because there is A FUCKING TIMER in the dialog system. This doesn't add IMMERSHUN, if anything it takes away from it because I'm not paying attention to what is being said.
- annoying-ass minigames that range from so easy that they might as well not be there (lockpicking) to rage inducing (hacking)
Let's see............ A17DE0Y.......FUCK! MY EYES! Yeah, I know about the EMP thing, but unless you're going to carry a bunch of them around all the time you are still going to have to put up with this far too often. The bypass minigame is passable (lol) but I've read that later there are sections where the number of circuits reach insane levels which leads me to believe that this game may indeed be destined for a date with my 12 guage.
- linear levels complete with sections blocked off by 3ft crates
I actually re-enabled the "jump" command via the ini's which let me bypass a whole section of one level and was glad for it.
- security cameras pointed at a steep angle towards the ground complete with DON'T WALK HERE lightshafts
Those terrorists should fire their security contractor; must have been Halibur......... I mean Haltech.
- scripted enemies that teleport right on top of you when you trigger an alarm and go back to picking their nose once you disable it. Never mind the fact that you can empty an assault rifle mag into somebody and enemies 100 feet away don't seem to notice.
- In one section you have to wait for the games scripts to trigger the obvious escape route before you can use it to make your DRAMATIC ESCAPE.
Seriously, WTF. I know that I am going to have to jump off of this catwalk to run to the helicopter, but you can only jump off where "X marks the spot" and "X" isn't there until the scripts run their course just so you can run to the helicopter while people shoot at you, as opposed to running to the helicopter 30 seconds ago when everyone was dead.
- disappearing corpses FTW
Why not add a corpse-hiding mechanic in favor of one of your retarded minigames like Thief and Nolf did, OVER TEN YEARS AGO.
- FUCK YOUR GODDAMN CHECKPOINTS
I was hopeful when I found the quicksave command in one of the ini's, but re-enabling it doesn't do anything sadly.
Does it get any better?
Andyman Messiah
Mr. Ed-ucated
My presence is needed in this thread. I just know it.
racofer
Thread Incliner
lefthandblack, how dare you say those things?
One doesn't simply bash at Obshitian.
One doesn't simply bash at Obshitian.
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2010
- Messages
- 10,874
Wow, take you that much time and effort to read 3 words?lefthandblack said:
The dialog system is definitely annoying, but the extent to which it has been called game-breaking is grossly exaggerated.
Yes. Hacking specifically should be killed with fire.
Circuits get to about 7 IIRC. I had maxed out the tech skill so never had problem with them. The only minigame that I failed actually was hacking, and only early on, though this one did stay annoying all the way to the end.
Some levels are linear, some are not. No 3ft crates, why do you lie?
Why do you lie?
... what? If this is the mission I have in mind, there are people shooting at you the moment you walk out. Well, shooting at either you or the heli, neither of which is good. So I killed them THEN found the X. I don't know if it was there before, but I definitely had no one shooting at me when I ran for the heli.
That (one minigame less, corpse hiding instead) would've definite inclined the game.
Eh, I raged a lot about the checkpoints until I read Brother None's review. I still don't agree with them, just because I hate checkpoints with a burning all-consuming hatred, but I can see why they implemented them and why they needed them for the particular design they had in mind. They did change the way I played the game, and not in a bad way.
Better uninstall right now if you're already raging so much.
Go back to your beloved Dragon Age, Biowhore.racofer said:
lefthandblack
Arcane
Any love that I had for Obsidian died when they infected NV with the STEAM virus. Yeah, it was probably Bethesda's call but fuck 'em anyway.
I'm just glad that I waited for this to hit the bargain bin; if I had paid full price for this POS I would want blood.
I'm just glad that I waited for this to hit the bargain bin; if I had paid full price for this POS I would want blood.
lefthandblack
Arcane
Of course not, but why go to the effort of hiring voice actors if the player is not able to focus their full attention on what is being said and think about it.Sceptic said:
Not lying. Re-enabling the jump command allowed me to jump over a crate and bypass a whole section of one of the first levels.
Again, not lying. I had just started the ability that lets you see where enemies are. Nobody was around, I triggered an alarm and three guys spawned in the next room. When you disable an alarm any nearby guard that doesn't see you goes from attack mode back to ho-hum mode. So an alarm has been triggered, Achmed and Mustafa are mysteriously missing from their posts, but let's just go back to picking our noses, everything is probably OK.
Yeah that's the mission. I killed everyone, the guys with the stingers shooting at the heli and all the others. I got up on the catwalk, the heli is on the ground and there is a blocking volume keeping me from jumping off the wall. I stand there for a few seconds and climb back down the ladder to look for another way out. Then three dudes come running out of the building shooting at me and the magic "X" has appeared on the catwalk.
racofer
Thread Incliner
Sceptic said:
I sure will. At least Bioware does not rely on the leftovers from other studios to make their games.
circ
Arcane
Yeah, they just recycle their old stuff.
CrunchyHemorrhoids
Prophet
- Joined
- Dec 5, 2010
- Messages
- 1,613
Andrej said:
You liked it more than DA, learn the difference.
Multidirectional
Arcane
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2009
- Messages
- 7,447
CrunchyHemorrhoids said:
Yes no one here judges games based on personal preference.
Objectively speaking DA is much more polished and finished. Gameplay elements that are there are better done in DA I suppose. I finished that unfinished piece of shit AP twice and had a good time. I tried to get into DA twice, both times giving it several hours and getting bored to death by just about everything in it.
Alexandros said:
My feelings as well.
racofer
Thread Incliner
Alexandros said:
Once you appreciate the taste of shit, there's no going back.
AP was Splinter Cell with bugs.
I'm replaying it atm and I can't bring myself to think more than "meh." The C&C is, indeed, very nice. I like how the game recognizes everything you do. But the shottery action is even worse than Mass Effect, the story and characters are on the same level, and contrary to Mass Effect this game takes itself extremely seriously.
It's just... not very fun, and very constricting to play the actual levels. Your weapon is choice? Not in the levels it's not. Maybe they mean the perks, but their impact aren't heavy enough to warrant that tagline.
It's just... not very fun, and very constricting to play the actual levels. Your weapon is choice? Not in the levels it's not. Maybe they mean the perks, but their impact aren't heavy enough to warrant that tagline.
Andyman Messiah
Mr. Ed-ucated
See that meme? I launched that. That's right. Beloved creator of Lithuanian Hitmen and I LIKED ALPHA PROTOCOL THIS MUCH! right goddamn here in this thread.
LusciousPear
Savant
Played it.
Was a good game.
Needed a year of polish.
Was a good game.
Needed a year of polish.
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