Dragon Age: Inquisition Pre-Release Thread

[Vault Dweller]

Is the 'ride the bull' thing for real?

Any other studio, I would have said no. Bioware? It's fucking real and then some.

 

[PhantasmaNL]

Companion wise they should have included Dog and Shale, so the whole fringe spectrum of sexual preference is covered. Missed opportunity there.

 

[Goat Vomit]

Is the 'ride the bull' thing for real?

Is that a rhetorical question?

 

[NotTale]

http://www.gamestar.de/videos/specials,20/dragon-age-inquisition,78807.html

I'm not going to strain myself trying to recall college German in real time for the entire bit, so someone translated for me. Apparently the ending isn't as good as DAO.

"I killed the dragon, the kingdom is saved, huzzah" is a high bar in some places.

 

[Azarkon]

So this time around, ole' Manjaw is the only romance option for normal guys. I can only guess what Bioware is trying to achieve with the bro demographic by forcefully shoving an androgynous female in their faces.

Or maybe the fedora tippers finally got strong, independent womyn that they've been begging for on the forums while secretly hoping for a new incarnation of Isabela.

Cassandra is literally in her late 30s. I love bashing Bioware for pandering as much as the next bro, but I have a difficult time seeing this character design as pandering, unless your target demographic is forty-year-old virgins, but even then I'd imagine they, following basic biological instinct, prefer women a lot younger than a not-quite-milf pushing on menopause. Consequently, I'm forced into the belief that Cassandra is basically Hepler's parting "Fuck You" to the nerds who ran her out of gaming, and Gaider is happy to oblige. Ironic though it is, Dragon Age romances are the opposite of design by marketing committee.

 

[7/10]

"I killed the dragon, the kingdom is saved, huzzah" is a high bar in some places.

Dude, spoiler tags. I haven't finished Origins yet.

 

[Makabb]

Shits starting to roll in

 

[Immortal]

Cass' tits look fake.

I was just thinking that.. those polygons are way too perky for a girl laying down.. must be some lythium silicone holding those mammary glands up.

"I killed the dragon, the kingdom is saved, huzzah" is a high bar in some places.

Dude, spoiler tags. I haven't finished Origins yet.

Sorry man.. he just gave you the plot for Biowares next 4 games.

 

[Angthoron]

Wow, well, this happened.

 

[Immortal]

Is the 'ride the bull' thing for real?

Any other studio, I would have said no. Bioware? It's fucking real and then some.

EA Executive: What the fuck did we learn Laidlaw?
Mike: Uhmm.. it's, uh, hard to say.
EA Executive: Jesus Fucking Christ.

This review needs to happen VD..

 

[Vault Dweller]

I wasn't eager to play the game before, but after the bull scene... Jesus... I'm definitely not the target audience.

 

[Immortal]

I wasn't eager to play the game before, but after the bull scene... Jesus... I'm definitely not the target audience.

Aren't you curious just how depraved a desperate dev team can go? Think of the depths Bioware will sink just to pander to their lowest common denominator demographic to stave off the inevitable EA liquidation of assets.

In the last 10 hours I have seriously considered day one purchase just to see how fucked up a biodrone inspired game will be.


The fact "Ride the Bull" is actually a fucking line in the game.. Bioware.. Seriously you need to stop taking writing advice from your forum.

 

[TheGreatOne]

Spoiler

What the fuck is up with those tumblr pictures? This is not the first time I've seen some moron write a diary on top of a picture like this. In fact when you picture search the name of any TGWTG "celebrity", among the first pictures that come up are the deranged diatribes of some disturbing tumblrina. "I like how April looks at Spoony this picture, it shows she is very compassionate and cares about him very much. I liked his hair better when it was shorter, that way the peak of his nose was highlighted more, which really suits his facial features". I'm not making that up, what the fuck is this shit? Sounds like something that an autistic woman would write, the kind that is 24+ years old and poorly draws pictures of winnie the pooh, horses and anime characters as a hobby and never uses make up. That's more creepy than Roguey, hell I wouldn't be surprised if I saw a screenshot of PoE with 2 paragraphs of text on top of it about how "Josh always maintains a positive mind set when trying to balance combat"

 

[kris]

I'm still reviewing this shit and oh God I hope there's a lot of insane scenes like these. Please BioWare, be so bad its good.

Are you in the video game media? Did you get an advance copy?

For a very prestigious magazine.

For review purpose it would actually be benficial if I could romance everyone. Maybe i will have a parallell playthrough on easy as a female just for that purpose.

 

[J_C]

Cass' tits look fake.

Just as her head.

 

[titus]

Shits starting to roll in

Somebody photoshop the bull.

 

[Erebus]

The minotaur romance makes me suspect someone at Bioware enjoyed Corruption of Champions a little too much.

 

[Makabb]

Guess I have to play this game to see how bad it is first hand.

 

[Average Manatee]

So, not going through the last few dozen pages: How's the gameplay?

Or have all previews agreed that the gameplay should take a backseat to :incloosive: ?

If it's decent like DA:O then I think I could play this, with the writing being enjoyable for "so bad its good" reasons.

 

[Deleted member 7219]

Just wondering how anyone could "ride the bull".

The size of that creature makes me think anyone who did so would be torn in half.

I can't believe I even had to write that, much less think it. BioWare actually went there.

 

[Whisky]

Oh my god, they actually included that line...

Who will be my waifu/husbandro now?

 

[titus]

Just wondering how anyone could "ride the bull".

The size of that creature makes me think anyone who did so would be torn in half.

I can't believe I even had to write that, much less think it. BioWare actually went there.

Not to mention that somebody APPROVED it. It's like layers over layers of shit.

 

[Whisky]

Because Biodrones go nuts over that sort of thing.

 

[Abu Antar]

Just wondering how anyone could "ride the bull".

The size of that creature makes me think anyone who did so would be torn in half.

I can't believe I even had to write that, much less think it. BioWare actually went there.

Maybe they are actually riding him? Not as having sex, maybe he can transform into a mount.

 

[Mystary!]

Oh my god, they actually included that line...

Who will be my waifu/husbandro now?

They actually had to re-hire Freddie Prinze Jr long after the initial recordings just for those specific lines...