Steampunk is what you make of it, and rejecting it simply because some use it in a shallow fashion hints at a very simple mind. Steampunk is merely a vehicle, and it could be either Arcanum or the Edison Bar with cogs glued to your forehead; it's entirely up to the creator
Most video-game designers don't have the time and creative energy to produce the next LoTR.
It doesn't need to be LotR, and LotR is a really shitty analogy since it already pulls primarily upon greatness in an era shock-full of great shit. Really, an average GM of an average PnP RPG can tell an awesome story and create an awesome scenario in any setting. You don't have to be fucking Tolkien to do something cool.
Tell a court drama in a steampunk setting. Have all the flying machines and all the gears and cogs and flying ships outside the window, and set the entire thing inside, above and below the Forbidden City-sized royal court of not!-Victorian Britan. Don't let the player take a single step outside, in the dirty streets of not!-London, merely allude to it, make references.
Create the scenario of a not!-German colonial soldier fighting the not!-Vietnam War in an era of post-Bismarckian not!-Wilhelminism, with the themes of
colonialist supremacy and
war is hell mixed in with pathological tea-drinking and an upper class of completely detached officers. Drop napalm from dirigibles.
Have a fantasy steampunk setting in which fantasy and magic is not in strict opposition, and set it in a frontier not!-America with elements of
weird west; investigate a murder, become a sheriff, turn to banditry and become an outlaw, uncover a plot of cannibal indians preying on a cult of incestuous pilgrims. Kill them all.
"Steampunk" is simply a vehicle for the imagination and the narrative, and an excuse to create scenarios and situations that may not otherwise arise, and to obsess over the aesthetics - or worse, obsess over the aesthetics because others are obsessing solely over the aesthetics - is retarded. It's OK to say "I don't like the aesthetics of steampunk, and therefore I will not use it" or "I don't feel I need the narrative vehicles of steampunk for the story I want to tell or the setting I want to create, and attaching it would merely be aesthetics and therefore largely meaningless", but to say that Steampunk is only aesthetics and therefore stupid and all these other people that care all about the aesthetics and nothing else are stupid and badwrongfun means you're nothing short of a faggot.
It is what you make of it. You don't want gas-lit cities with steam cars and tesla-fueled gauss rifles and flying ships? That's fine. You can go for something else. You don't have to like the same things. But if you say that steampunk sucks because there's faggots that think of it as and use it merely as an aesthetic, gluing cogs to chimney hats and calling it steampunk, you're just another person that would glue cogs to chimney hats and calling it steampunk,
if only you liked steampunk. So instead, you glue <insert preference> to <insert other preference> and call it <whatever is appropriate as determined by preferences>.