Let's Play Men of War (Battle of Moscow Part 2)

[Fens]

tried doing that mission without mine fields... it's possible to win the mission, but i'd say it's pretty much impossible to hold the secondary objectives

looking forward to seeing hamster in the penal company

 

[Erzherzog]

Just wait for the Sevastopol mission. Greatest RTS mission right there.

In SP, taking out turrets is like cheating. So easily done and opponent bails tank.

(Also, play American missions, you rage, you lose.)

 

[Cassidy]

The Song of Partisans

Partisan Song

In the occupied village of Sinyavskoe, the Nazis were trying to forge of Fifth Column against the Soviet Union through torture and brainwashing of captured prisoners of war, and by consequence they left a huge amount of sensitive information in their SS HQ over there. Hamster was in a world of hurt, but circumstances would still roll out high luck for the courageous Putin fan. A resistance attack gets the Germans by surprise, and then, inspired by Saint Putin, Hamster does what every proper Russian man would do in such circumstances:

He goes EXTREME

Hamster: I luck the partisans attack german today. I need help comrades, not run away like a georgian.

Hamster: Say no knife to firefight. I prove them wrong!

Hamster: Knife best for silent kill of german scum. Also EXTREME to the EXTREME.

Viktor Grischenko: Hold on, guys! We must lure the Germans to our positions then the second group will have a chance to take over the HQ.

Hamster: Two light armor no match for EXTREME Hamster bless by Saint Putin. I take them both alone.

Hamster: Coward German hiding take potshot in my arm, I need run for cover to tend wound.

Hamster: Yes I so badass my punch rip hole in your chest nazi scum!

Hamster: Where is your fuhrer now?

Hamster: Comrade what is situation?

Viktor Grischenko: The Germans have Russian soldiers as prisoners in that school building, but most important of all is the SS building behind it. It will be heavily defended, but we all saw how you destroyed those armored vehicles.

Hamster: I am Junior Lieutenant Hamster.

Viktor Grischenko: Take as many as you wish under your command then. I trust your leadership skills and genius. I heard tales about your heroic defense of Rostov-on-Don. Congratulations comrade!

Hamster: It is all Saint Putin protection.

Hamster: Ура!

Viktor Grischenko: Take my men and hurry to the HQ. We will block the road leading to the village in order to avoid any surprises...

Hamster: Right, two-men team. Most left rest right. Hey you, old guy! Take lead of four men go right.

: CRISPY AS FUCK®

Hamster: What?

: Isn't that how I suppose you want the Germans to end?

Hamster: Sure, make them CRISPY AS FUCK®

Hamster: Get school through flanks!

: New people are always so impulsive, One lone man with a machinegun should run away when outnumbered, not fight to death.

:These dumb German youngsters believing in the first loon spewing rhetoric they get. Hey comrade, how long before 11/11/11 ?

Hamster 1911 already over. Why 11/11/11 ?

: 11/11/2011, and I am ready for it, so it shouldn't matter.

Hamster: But die old age long ago by 2011, right?

: When was Saint Putin born?

Hamster: Oh, nevermind...

: Illiterate Nazis coming back to school? Hey take this Skyrim DLC for me!

Hamster: Crispy squad almost taking school, we must press for surprise attack HQ!

Dmitry Kolesnikov: Geronimo!

: There will be INFINITE Hand Grenades in the Skyrim Modern Warfare Rimjob Mod!

Oleg Petrov: Thanks. Now if only I had some weapons, no German would be left standing in this village!

Dmitry Kolesnikov: Careful, people! The German reinforcements have arrived.

Hamster: Provide support fire from school, Crispy. I infiltrate HQ as EXTREME Hamster.

Hamster: Careful, only shoot when need, try to sneak.

Hamster: Riflemen take position from distance, let those with sub and machineguns do infiltrate.

Hamster: That was close. Keep move.

: Covert ambush took one of our comrades down, but the ambusher is fortunately dead! Why isn't there an enemy radar with cooldown here? It could have saved a life!

Hamster: If we are attack from this position must clean house first, but silence, knife perfect. Look and learn.

Hamster: Nobody can stand me! Damn need clean other house full german.

Hamster: Prepare ambush!

Lavrenti Beria Nikolaev: Almost there comrade, just a second!

Hamster: Great! Let's listen to our favourite song!

Hamster: Ура!

Hamster: Crispy! We cleared way! Advance as much as you can safe!

: I would charge frontally if there was health regeneration, but unfortunately there isn't so this takes longer than it should.

: Way is almost clear, Hamster! Way to go!

Anton Akimov: It seems the Germans have been reinforced! Hold on, soldiers!

Hamster: Keep head down! Ambush vehicle when can! Molotov Cocktail burns german already so no despair!

Lavrenti Beria Nikolaev: Take that oblivious German scum! Someone get an anti-tank grenade here ASAP!

Hamster: That is it! I am going in HQ! Cover me!

Hamster: Ура!

Hamster: Documents here help greatly against german war machine. Must give them to those in know.

Hamster: Everyone, keep on' trucking!

Hamster: I need two avatars of Saint Putin manliness escort the way forest!

: My name is Greenfagget Crimhead. Will my bravery serve as inspiration for the soviet man?

: We shall Never Forget you, Greenfagget Crimhead, but we need to hurry up! So get you and your friend Sylvester Avellone on that motorcycle ASAP!

: I'll get this bike on the road!

: There are some German scum ahead. Don't worry I and Avellone can take care of them!

: Sorry friend, but I think I ran out of options. That armored car over there will slaughter everyone in the truck if it isn't taken care of, and there is nowhere close enough to toss an anti-tank grenade safely at it. Remember me.

: I will. :manlytears:

Hamster: Sylvester Avellone, we never forget you. And CrimHead, we never forget you too.

: Keep the gas floored! I'll buy you as much time as I can!

: Can't you get this truck to run faster? There is a tank right behind you!

Hamster: I fear this is best speed this german trash can run.

Hamster: Turn left! Hurry! We are almost reaching the woods.

: Oh no! Another tank to our left! Run, everybody! R...

Everybody was thrown over the grass. Vision blurred, the ear ringed with the sound of the explosion, and then he wondered:

Hamster: Am I dead?

: Get up and hurry! We have little time.

An arm tried to pull him up. A barely conscious soldier who survived the truck's explosion made a suicidal last stand against the soldiers and the Panzer IV to buy time for other survivors. He could barely be seen along the thick smoke and dust. Hamster began to run for the woods.

Although he was literally CRISPY AS FUCK®, the old partisan known as Crispy somehow managed to survive. The three survivors thus dashed through the woods, ever vigilant for German patrols or random bears to show up because Un Oso is A Bear.

Hamster: We did it! I need tell NKVD these sordid german plans!

COMING NEXT: The March of the Defenders of Moscow

 

[anus_pounder]

Epic LP. Lets hope bugs or some other shit don't kill it.

 

[eklektyk]

as always magnificient and full of WIN<tm>

 

[Cassidy]

Once again I had to split a single mission in two updates. Here is the first one:

=====================

March of the Defenders of Moscow, Part 1

March of the Defenders of Moscow

After many German advances, Brother None was stationed only fifty kilometers east of Moscow, tasked to defend a perimeter of the massive Eastern Front. A brave recon aircraft pilot uncovered massive German formations advancing towards their direction, and they didn't have fully dug in yet. Thus they would have to hold out at the outermost lines as much as they could while the main defense lines are built, in a race against time. The future of the Great Patriotic War and of the Soviet Union thus lied in their hands.

: Position our only anti-tank gun in the safest place possible! We cannot afford to lose it! Spread out machinegunners and anti-tank rifles! Hey! Get all surplus machineguns... I don't care you are a rifleman, I want you with that DP-27! The Germans won't be stopped by so many rifles and so few automatic weapons! And for the second time, don't wait for me to issue you an order to get more ammunition! (As if they would listen to the last one, *sigh*)

: If you live to fight another day, remember this should you ever end in recon duty: scouting is all about being fast and avoiding combat, if you don't want to end like those dumb Germans right there! (I miss Hamster, but I should accept that he is long dead by now)

: One more thing, Once the Panzers start coming, unless they are Panzer IIs, don't bother aiming for anything other than the tracks because it's the only part of them your anti-tank rifles can damage, I fear we will have to take many risks to delay them long enough.

Here they come!

: Boy, stay behind and keep supporting your fellow soldiers in the forward defense lines! (If they are recruiting boys that young I better really end victorious here. Moscow is behind us after all.)

: Our luck they foolishly sent the APCs ahead without support from the Panzers! Remember, even after the Panzers arrive, do your best to destroy their light armor!

Yakim Shcherbakov: I am better than an entire German Panzergrenadier group and their vehicle!

: We need support! That flakpanzer started slaughtering our comrades!

: Were you expecting that a stack of logs would stop bullets from hitting you? Stop being indoctrinated by Banal, Shit, Boring POPAMOLE! This is a great game done by an Ukrainian developer rather than greedy Kwa' suits and their retarded developers and Company of Heroes ripped it off making an inferior version of it for consoletards and casuals! Don't forget that!

: I held off major German offensives 7 times! Who do you think you are to suggest me what to do?

: Victory or Death!

: Stuka! Get away from its heading!

: I'm going to shoot that German scum in the air!

: Good news, nobody got hurt by that airstrike! Someone put that Stuka down!

: Warn the sniper it's heading straight to the house where he is hidden!

: Nooo!

: Fuck the Germans man! Why do they have to give me the blueballs? Now where else are we going to find deadly and hot chicks in this Winter?

: Focus on the battle ahead, Melcar! The Soviet High Command will have a nice reward if we pull this off greatly!

: Men, if I got my arms tore off or something I would ask her if I could do her while she sniped Germans, now I'll most likely die soon!

: Be glad you won't die a virgin then! Also, how the hell could you have sex while suffering the immense pain of an amputated arm?

:

: Nevermind *sigh*

: That is it! Let us humiliate the Germans by putting their Panzers down with a single AT gun, some AT rifles and lots of anti-tank grenades!

: I fear I'll need to start it. Who does havet he least amount of relatives here?

: Man, now that the chick died, just let me go with the anti-tank grenade. I'll die of old age in a few years anyway man! I can't hold my habits.

: You won't be forgotten, Melcar, but wait a little. I think we can still make it through without such need.

: Men, if we survive this we'll get so many hoes after being awarded as Heroes of the Soviet Union. If I die, do one in my memory!

: That is it, comrades! Don't give ears to rumors about the other parts of the front. What we did today we must never forget. We shamed the Germans and their honor. We held off against impossible odds and continue to do so!

: I'm not sure if I want to see the "other honor" of the Germans.

: That is not the type of honor I meant.

: Goebbels will have a long day covering up the truth with bullshit and lies after this Battle!

Yakim Shcherbakov: Ура!

Yakim Shcherbakov: Could someone pass up more anti-tank rounds? I'm running out of ammo!

: Who the hell is commanding those guys? Hey! Get back to the defense lines! You'll achieve nothing if you last only a few seconds in battle!

: Hold the line until the last man! As long as our resources and surviving comrades allow, we will hold them off!

: I think my time has come.

The Unforgiven

: Melcar! Wait!

: Never forget me...

: We won't forget you, Melcar.

: That Flakpanzer could support a breach in our lines! I'm taking it down!

: I salute your courage, comrade! But try to get back to the line alive if you can!

: Beware of the Shells in the Night!

: Have we beaten the record of most tanks destroyed with a single light anti-tank gun?

: I don't know, but we will hold the record as the most legendary defense since the Battle of Thermopylae, and unlike there, we shall emerge victorious!

: Ignore the Flak 88. It won't reach our defense lines! And I fear I need another volunteer for an heroism. It is your turn, Gragt.

Nikita Titov: If I die, give this to Ekaterina Shevchenko, my sister.

: I will.

Nikita Titov: I outsmarted a Panzer!

: Ура!

: Damn it! At this rate we will run out of men first than they run out of Panzers!

: Stay put! We will hold them off as long as we can, and once we can no longer make a difference here I'll give the retreat order so we'll meet our comrades in the main defense line.

: Moscow will never be stepped upon by their tanks!

: Let us never forget those among us who did the ultimate sacrifice and went to Oblivion. For they brought countless tanks together with them. Our brave infantry will never scale to their level!

: I counted more than half a dozen Panzers we destroyed or disabled! They won't keep coming forever! Will they?

: They will pay a terrible price in blood and burning wrecks for every inch they advance!

Vsevolod Zakharov: In one moment, Earth; in the next, Heaven.

: Wait, I haven't yet decided who's next.

: They volunteered, Brother None, to the ultimate sacrifice for the Motherland.

: The situation is getting critical! We are thinly spread in the lines and after all the armors we destroyed they still didn't stop!

: Don't retreat! Hold still! We can still buy a little more time.

Modest Chernyshev: Ура!

: Hey you! Get some machinegun ammo ASAP! The Germans are trying to break through your position!

: Today we will be forever legends of the Great Patriotic War! We have destroyed a dozen of Panzers and even more German armors with scarce supplies, but, isn't it the time we fall back?

: Soon, I know many are running out of ammunition, but every minute we stay here is one more minefield, one more fortification for us and all other comrades at the main line.

: Good news: The maxim gun and the machine-gunner at the east side managed to scavenge ammunition from a German wreck. The bad news: yet another Panzer incoming and there only a few of us left alive!

: That Panzer may end with its aim blocked by the wrecks ahead of it. Try to immobilize it right there!

: I'll do my best.

Outnumbered by far, they refused to give up.

Say what they want about the Germans taking less casualties on overall, but on this part of the front, the saying that the Soviets only win by numbers is untrue.

One man's death will be less of an impact than the destruction of a Panzer and slaughter of its entire crew. But their lines were thinned already. Brother None refused to give up too early. He knew there was one right time to fall back, and he wanted to do it at this ideal time, even if only a few would make it through.

: Get ready to fire!

: You did it!

: I have only one anti-tank round left, we are all running out of ammo here!

: Don't worry, I know we will have no choice but to retreat soon unless we wish to all die in a tactically futile last stand.

: More armored vehicles incoming! I am the only anti-tank riflemen in the eastern line still alive and I have only one bullet left! We will die if we don't fall back soon!

: All right! Comrades, your heroism was incredible, but we must retreat now. Everyone, fall back to the main defense line, and let us hope we bought them enough time to set up a formidable barrier against further German advances!

: *pants* In the main line we will define this battle's outcome! Do not falter comrades! The Motherland counts on you!

 

[anus_pounder]

You finally get tanks of your own (armored cars) in the main lain, I think. Great LP, why not comment on it more, faggots ?!?

 

[Cassidy]

From now on I will not update this thread unless at least three people comment about it between each update.

 

[eklektyk]

From now on I will not update this thread unless at least three people comment about it between each update.

got me to log in and post...

unforgivable ......

 

[Kashmir Slippers]

Please continue.

 

[ironyuri]

giv me updatan or giv me death

also slava russie!

 

[Insane Psychic]

Carry on, it is very entertaining!

 

[Cassidy]

March of the Defenders of Moscow, Part 2: T-26 World's Best Tank

Sabaton - Panzerkampf

: As the last six of the first defense lines you made it through. Take position farther away, you already took the riskier positions long enough! Let me review what the time we bought led to. From the west, it seems they have set up a formidable line, including a T-34

: There is no gap in the minefields, which extend all the way to the east as well. The deaths of our fallen comrades weren't in vain, for here we will be in a much better situation to hold off against what remains of the German offensive. I should call my commanding officer to requisition some reinforcements, just in case.

Major Tsarcomrade: ARMA II Herp derp herp derp. Hurr durr.

: Requesting as many T-26s as possible to reinforce the defenses. (What is wrong with him?)

Major Tsarcomrade: Butthurt eurofag detected.

: If this is a joke there is nothing funny about it. *hangs phone*

: No matter how retarded he sounded, at least the reinforcements arrived. And just in time!

: I'm staying in this house, let us provide fire support to our men.

: I have a feeling that, even though we are in a much better situation, things won't be easy.

: (How I miss that fool Hamster. None of the soldiers that survived at the forward defense lines want to talk to me anymore. They think they are all going to die. I hate writing monologues)

: (If Hamster was here he would probably make a hyperbole on how the T-26 is superior to a Tiger Tank because it moves faster than the Tiger turret can turn around to keep an aim at it.)

: For a change, the beginning of the German offensive has near zero casualties in our side. Keep going comrades! We will push them back yet!

The T-26, with it fast rate of fire, high speed and mobility has become the great star of this battle, outmatching even Panzer IVs by flanking them.

Many medals await the brave crew of this armored vehicle.

: Look at how they are slaughtered over the frozen lake! They will not advance one inch further!

: (Now he would have complained on how he just lost one for his "potato truck collection". I wish he was alive)

: Hey! I told you to stay inside the house! (And if they did those two mortars would be set up on our right flank and used against our soldiers with impunity, yet, over there, without any place to take cover, I fear that the last six survivors of the first phase of this battle won't live much longer.)

: Ура! (I'm falling into the fad of shouting such cry everytime I don't know what else to comment about the success of the ongoing battle too)

: To the T-26 crew, see if you can put down those self-propelled howitzers, but try to do it without exposing yourselves to an infantry ambush!

T-26 best light tank of the world.

Countless wrecks of German panzers and armored vehicles become the most permanent result of the battle. Everything continues to apparently work in favor of the Soviets.

Yet, casualties are inevitable. The brave T-26 crew thus advances far ahead of the defense lines to engage the remaining howitzers.

It works better than expected. Most German armored vehicles have been utterly destroyed by a truly unbreakable barrier.

After seeing the hastily done defenses on the forward line, the Germans expected to meet an army in disarray and lacking in any fortifications. They paid a huge price for such assumption.

: More men to the trenches! No surrender! No retreat!

: We drew the line in the snow here. No German shall move an inch beyond our lines!

: The Germans are trying to assault our eastern lines! Hold up! This is a desperation assault! We are almost there! Just hold a little longer, comrades! I requested an armored car to provide support to you!

: Let us never forget all men who fought to the end in defense of the Motherland! (The six survivors are gone. They knew it, yet tehy sacrificed themselves to save a much greater amount of soldiers from certain death by botching a devious German plan. I should have just blown up that bridge there instead, but it is too late now)

The German ferocity is diminishing, the signs are clear they will soon give up.

Or maybe not... maybe only once the main forces arrive they will be persuaded to give up.

: At last! We did it comrades! Get ready! We will take back our land!

Captain Obvious: And thus, the time has come to strike back.

In case the song already ended, this part of it was supposed to sync with the counter-offensive

: Forward against the enemy! Up to the unremitting battle comrades! For the Motherland! For Moscow!

Everybody: Ура!

Commissar Viktor Wakhamolov: Do not count choices, do not count consequences, count only the number of Germans you have popped! Pop the German! This is your mother's prayer! Pop the German! This is the cry of your Russian Earth! Do not waver, do not let up, pop!

: We will burn so many of your bolshevik scum tanks that with the smoke from their smouldering wrecks the sun will vanish from your skies!

: We will fight in the shade.

(OOL: Sorry, I'm running out of cheap one-liners. Also I placed this comment here just as a cheap excuse of a filler between this and the next screenshot. But come on, the screenshots alone of the tank battle in this mission end are already good for they are)

Commissar Steriotop Villainov: The crew with tank shoot, the crew without the tank follow and shoot with their submachineguns. If the Germans leave a working tank the crew without tank get in it and shoot!

Thus this chapter of the war was coming to a close end. The Germans wasted too many of their forces, and now were ripe for a massed counter-offensive from which this was just the beginning.

Random Redshirt Tank Crew: Shove your AT grenade in your ass German scum!

Surely, casualties are inevitable when there are German tanks coming from different directions and thus one way or another the tank flank will be exposed.

The T-26, with its last rounds, is putting a great finale to its performance in this legendary battle.

It takes long commitment and training to ensure something awesome happens through a T-26, but it is ultimately much more fulfilling than pressing a single AWESOME button. The same kind of experience of killing a German machinegunner with a knife Hamster is so used to.

: Watch out for field guns! Get the KV-2 to deal with them!

The KV-2 may move and turn it turret very slowly, and although it is too slow for a frontline tank, it has:

A very awesome gun

that can outrange.

Everything.

: The way is clear! Forward!

: Almost there!

Everyone: Ура!

: Say whatever they want about the battle of Moscow, but here, for every Russian that died, nearly five Germans went down. When it comes to my command, there is more than just numbers and the ones who take the heavier casualties are always the Germans. (Wish I knew what was the final fate of my friend Hamster)

Coming Next: The Penal Cannon F... Battalion

 

[anus_pounder]

Epic. Nice use of the T26. I mostly used the Armored Car, I thought it had a better gun.