[LP CYOA] Epic

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Hmm. Maybe you are right. Relevant quote below:

We'll let you decide on this. We're... ah... washing our hands of all responsibility.
We should be giving him a way back here, but honestly, we don't really want to see that insufferable twat again either.

You have the opportunity to act with free will right now. It seems that the voices aren't too keen on bringing this Ra back either. Since they're unwilling to be responsible for this, though... well, you don't really care for gods anyway.

You crush the Sceptre with your hands and stomp on the pieces. Naram is dumbfounded. "You... traitor."

Well, that's it.
He's going to be really, really pissed if he ever finds out you did this.
We just have to make sure he never finds out. Stay optimistic, guys!

This was a great moment.

 

[Baltika9]

Well, the characteristic is certainly accurate.

<sigh> I miss those guys (asking for it).

 

[Bloodshifter]

Whelp I did say I was gonna sit back and watch this CYOA sorta break apart at your guys hands but that was before we firuged we could eat a tree *made from aliens*

Casting mah vote
A

 

[treave]

Locking this down as an A victory.

Good news: Ean is mentally strong enough to retain control.

Bad news: you guys just performed the equivalent of binge eating a hundred million Big Macs in one go.

 

[Baltika9]

And so was born​

BLOBERT​

THE EMPEROR OF BRO!​

​

 

[treave]

Ean's last hurrah will be up sometime in the next 12 hours.

 

[Kukulkan]

Will we get a BLOBERT voice too?
EDIT: Last hurrah? I predict we'll become a sort of Hivemind with our presence being the most dominant. Hopefully nuEan will still have the goal of saving the planet.

 

[Baltika9]

Wait...last?

Oh shit, we'll burst apart, huh?

 

[Baltika9]

Well, here's hoping treave will let us continue with another character, say Shulgi, if Ean will be destroyed forever.

 

[Baltika9]

Ean will become one with the Planet, bro. Bathe in the lifestream

So, we'll get to play as Holy Terra itself? About time someone kicked that showoff Jupiter in the nuts moons.

Edit: or even better, the Planet will gain a benevolent and utterly invincible "Genius Loci," guarding it's children. Aww yeah.

 

[treave]

Ean's already Jenova. Dio is Sephiroth.

Edit: yeah, fertilizer is close. Ean becomes a flower.

 

[Baltika9]

Edit: yeah, fertilizer is close. Ean becomes a flower.

Thekind? Although pollinating humanity would be p. sweet.

 

[treave]

inb4 we blossom and pollinate the entirety of mankind with god-like powers

I'm... not ruling that out. Let's just say that the potential for such an event is there.

Welp, going to retreat for the writeup. This is going to be long, since there's no other choice left for him but to do what he can with his final moments.

 

[Kukulkan]

Since we haven't seen the Americas in this CYOA I believe we should play an immortal in the Western Hemisphere.

 

[Baltika9]

fucking people never listen...rue the day, I told you.

on the other hand, I guess I never liked Ean all that much. time to go grimdark.

Take heart. As you yourself said

...sure you did.

For posterity: B will end up badly, especially considering the ramifications of his awakening and the timeskip in which Dio can do all sorts of scary shit.

Also, I remember, at the beginning of this chapter, I pushed the envelope for Dio to be picked instead of Aodh. Lo and behold, he was.

\

it's all going according to play, my child. rejoyce in chaos dio's dark majesty

To be honest, I was hoping against hope that devouring a tree made of Gieloth would mutate Ean into a mad Cthulhu. Pity that never came to pass.

If we actually succeed in saving the planet and treave deems us worthy of continuing this LP, it wouldn't be that far-fetched to assume that the whole of Man will eventually worship their Emperor-Flower like the Concordiat did with their tree. Considering the usual association of flowers with, well, feminine men it wouldn't be inconceivable that our military will look like such

And Humanity will eventually grow pointy ears and give birth to Slaanesh. The heresy is almost unbearable.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Really, though, as far as last meals go, you can't go wrong with a hundred million Big Macs...

 

[Baltika9]

treave, we'll get to continue though, right?

...right?

Lambchop19, we've all been there bro. Honestly, as far as the 'dex's track record goes, this may have been our best option.

 

[Tigranes]

....for the record, I voted B.

It's a pity the world shall never know the return of great Ean before he becomes the new Harold.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Actually, I'm not entirely suprised the tree turned out to be a bit more than Ean could handle. Just hoped the power we'd get from it would be enough to deal with Naram-Master before we bought it. Again, my rational was to stop the tree from destroying the earth and gain the power to defeat Naram-Master or at least throw a wrench in his plans at whatever the cost. Since treave was talking about wrapping up the lp anyway, I thought Ean should do whatever he could to save the Earth and all the humans on it - even if it cost him his life (though I was hoping it wouldn't come to that). I like the idea of Ean sacrificing himself for a worthy cause anyway. It's his character. He's not the god-emperor of mankind, he's a lowly soldier from Babylon who would give his life for his king and his people. From cutting off his hand for his king, to sacrificing his powers in Egypt, to saving a lovestruck moron, to fighting a god and a mad god-king at the same time, to jumping into a rift in time and space in order to save humanity, and then to enduring 3000 years of torture and fighting his way back to his home on Earth. Yeah, those were mostly bad ideas, but they were Ean's bad ideas. They came from a noble heart with noble intentions. For that heart to die, frustrating the ambitions of nations and kings, alien races, and gods and then to bloom into a flower that fills the sky... Seems like a good death for Ean. We'll see how it all turns out though.

 

[Kukulkan]

I have an idea. Treave can split us up into teams where each one takes control of and commands an immortal somewhere in the world. It's like that thing root did.

 

[Baltika9]

Seems like a good death for Ean. We'll see how it all turns out though.

Yep. Set the world to rights and then, well, "I'm out guys, try not do anything stupid again, will you? Only so many mistakes I can fix." Flash a tired, shit-eating grin, close his eyes and take a well-deserved rest, inspiring everyone else for millennia to come.

I'm actually hoping Shulgi will finally learn "the meaning of love," as in love for his fellow man, and will assume the mantle of God-Emperor eventually to drive mankind to the stars. It's a pipedream I have.

Edit: and let's not start doing this "well, I did expect this and I was confused and panicked" hamster wheeling. We did what we thought would be best. We miscalculated and that is that.

 

[Esquilax]

This sucks, but then again, maybe this would be the only way to save Earth. I'm not exactly surprised that Ean didn't make it out of this, but I just don't see how we could have come into the conflict in Olympus late and expected to work towards some sort of advantage. If we left earlier or devoured our Successors, perhaps, but at this point, I was so desperate that I didn't see alternatives.

treave, if we left for Olympus, what would our options have been? I suppose there's no harm in telling us at this point.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

also, sekhenun will never know our embrace.

We were from two different worlds, bro. We were destined to become a flower and she was destined to become a sword. It wasn't meant to be, bro. It just wasn't meant to be...

 

[treave]

Olympus:

Dio asks you to trust him. If you do he stabs you in the back and steals Anbar-Shi, then stabs Naram in the back and ascends thanks to the precarious dimensional flux and raging powers that have been enslaved to turn the Master into an even higher being. World is saved though. You survive, but Dio is now God.

If you don't you kill him and then lose control because of the Sekblade plus aforementioned unstable reality, devour Naram and everything else, your awakened memories of the void allowing you to comprehend and eat even the spheres and their higher forms. You end and reset everything.

Something along those lines. The optimum path of action was actually to draw attention to yourself as soon as possible so that Shulgi could indeed confirm you were back. His information gathering is being stymied by Dio.

 

[Baltika9]

also, sekhenun will never know our embrace.

We were from two different worlds, bro. We were destined to become a flower and she was destined to become a sword. It wasn't meant to be, bro. It just wasn't meant to be...

And the irony if this is, if we had married her and made her Empress, she would have been far too busy to experiment with portals and hence, Terra would have been fine and dandy.

But nooooo, you bastards just had to oppose the MHD, didn't you? Well this is what happens when the MHD is denied.

I told you so.


Edit:

The optimum path of action was actually to draw attention to yourself as soon as possible so that Shulgi could indeed confirm you were back. His information gathering is being stymied by Dio.

Oh god fucking damn it.

Edit 2: true to my self I have brought the Decline.