disagree with Tuidjy on his take that best use of companions is as straight up fighters, training them into good lords means you can have devoted vassals precisely when you need them, and you can do stuff like give Baheshtur 10 pathfinding, tactics, and training, and watch him defend all of the eastern lands by himself (as well as his buddy Rolf's lands to the west). Probably best to keep all noble companions with default combat stats, and prioritize training them over commoners who can take more powerstrike and whatever. After having your own kingdom healthy and well run, you don't even have to do much fighting yourself, companions are there mostly used as body guards so you can still clean up the 60 steppe bandits and other trash without trouble or for their skills. And giving them excellent equipment is what lets them wreck bandits and other trash anyway.
Also, it's important to reduce the number of companions in your line-up so your emissaries can rotate back into the party with news of the end of the war (and I think you'd be best with several emissaries, even when not negotiating for truces sending them just to talk with kings lets you know how hostile they feel toward you). Being forced to prolong a war because Katrin keeps coming back is very very bad.
and I'm finding assigning fiefs between companions and lords with their different personalities that effect how they behave in war to be extremely interesting and fun to figure out. Upstanding and good lords are not really "the best" as they still take relation loss for assigned fiefs (just not with upstanding and good lords, they don't mind sharing land with good guys) and don't actually campaign with you unless very loyal. Martial lords don't answer calls to campaign unless they're very loyal as well. They're also likely let their villages get burned down as they run too far afield chasing other lords, but they are very aggressive. Cunning Lords are regular bastards, but they answer your calls to arms and fight sensibly. Self-Righteous requires a lot of land but they defend it and campaign with you. Probably only Lezalit is worth it. The troublesome lords can be useful for building relations with other lords, just don't take their side in arguments. I have a troublesome brother-in-law and I don't think he'll ever betray me no matter how much he hates me. No ideas about sadistic, they probably love raiding villages, which can be useful.
I find myself sieging castles with infantry and archers I have on hand with lords nearby, then using the castle as a base for my heavy cavalry which I use to destroy any who come to attack in the field, as waiting around for a siege to start isn't any good. Also only fight battles we need to, as wiping the AI out over and over will drop faction relations too low to ever make peace with. Very neat how they designed the game so this stuff can function sort of how they were used in real life.
HOPE THIS POST ISN'T TOO LONG FAGGOTS
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think i actually figured a way to keep all 16 companions without persuasion:
if you look at the companion circle, you can "pass off" the relation penalty around the circle by siding with one of them in an argument, but one of the companions in each circle will ruin it for the rest, and end up giving a net -10 relations to two adjacent companions.
Those two companions- one in each circle who are both friends- will have to leave the party regularly to keep it from collapsing. I would suggest Katrin and Bunduk in order to keep all the nobles in party at all times. So when Rolf and Bunduk quarrel, you'd take Bunduk's side, and the same with Lezalit- when they quarrel take Bunduk's side. Then when Rolf and Lezalit's morale tanks you'd send Bunduk away.
When you begin making companions lords it will become fully stable, save for Jeremus and Artimenner. When Lezalit and Firentis are made lords they will be unstable. You can alternate them as ministers to keep your companion return que clear. And when they argue, make sure to play both sides with them.
You would probably have to send companions out on spy missions at the game start when you haven't found each of the companions friends, but it will eventually become stable. If you kill tons of bandits while sorting out your band of heroes it should work.
