This LP is rigged from the start...Hey, we made it to Vegas!

[Havoc]

Yes Man. Caesar is too EXTREEMEEE for the desert. NCR is just a bunch of political scumbags nad House is a dictator.

 

[Jaedar]

House, I've seen yes man and NCR endings, and Caesar's legion would be flipfloppy

 

[Jim Cojones]

Mr. House has a lot of needs, sugar. I take care of all of them, and a lady doesn't kill and tell.

She says "kiss", not "kill".

 

[Black]

Yes Man because he's Yes Man and you can shape Vegas however you want!!

 

[Brother None]

You don't actually really chose now. For instance, you can do the NCR quest and still turn to any of the other factions. It's pretty clear in warning you when you're about to lock into one faction.

I've seen everything but the Legion which I'm doing now myself, so I don't care much. You could do NCR and when you hit the BoS, try

Spoiler

to keep them alive, I never managed that (quest bugged out for me so I had to kill em). Never did much with the Enclave remnants either.

One thing I tried and didn't seem to do much was take Yes Man and blow up the dam. No mention of it getting destroyed in the endings. Really weird

Yes Man is a good option too. Despite being a pretty shitty concept, with his writing and voice acting he's pretty good.

 

[anus_pounder]

NCR !!

 

[Radisshu]

MISTER HOUSE, the smuggest motherfucker of them all. And not a really bad guy.

 

[SoupNazi]

House, I've seen yes man and NCR endings, and Caesar's legion would be flipfloppy

 

[RK47]

OK. The voting isn't closed till there's no turning back. To be honest, I'm more inclined on NCR. But Courier's Honor is at stake, let's get the Chip back to Mr. House.

At the moment, let's do as what Mr. House says and head to Fortification Hill. The only possible way to get to Fortification Hill aka Caesar's stronghold is through Cottonwood Cove's ferry dock. I suppose this is a game design decision, they don't want Caesar to die to a wandering Deathclaw.

I left Boone behind at the Strip to avoid him going psycho, taking only Veronica and ED-E with me.

The crucified raider outside Cottonwood Cove is still alive.

I wanted to free him, but the game gave me no options. So I decided to leave him alone.

Ordinary guys with knives and bullets, and they're taking over Nevada.

It's all in the numbers, Veronica.

Hey, you got a second?

What is it?

The Brotherhood is failing. I've always known that. If we don't change course, we're going to fall apart or...fade away. But until recently I haven't understood where we went wrong, or how to fix it. I think I need to go home.

Not now, Veronica.

Can it wait?

Sure, yeah. Just not too long, okay? I worry about them sometimes.

(Show Mark of Caesar) I was invited.

The Legion guard directed me to Cursor Lucullus who is waiting for me at the docks.

A fenced pen held slaves inside. I wanted so badly to rescue them, but dare not risk it until I retrieve the Platinum Chip.

Dozens of guards patrol the camp. To release the slaves would be pointless anyway, they'd just get killed while trying to escape. I took a sip from the nearby river before heading to the docks.

I nodded in consent and was taken to the Fortification Hill, stronghold of the Legion.

Upon arrival, they took away my weapons and chemicals including stimpacks. I managed to smuggle in my explosives and pistol with my sneaking skills.

Crucified soldiers.

Load bearing female slaves.

And children trained to be soldiers.

Those are the fates awaiting Mojave should Caesar's Legion succeed in taking it.

I told Veronica and ED-E to wait outside.

Meet Caesar, the most underwhelming villain so hyped and hated due to his men's actions. The voice actor can't capture anything, and I wasn't impressed. To this day, I still don't see the difference between him and a generic voiced boss I have to kill. He has no scars, no facial features, no charisma, just a dude with a unique armor in a middle of tribe worshipers. They've failed their last bid to convince me to their cause. The first time I met him, I just hit VATS and killed everyone after we finished our conversation.

Years of meticulous scheming to place a mole at Camp McCarran - wasted. So tell me this, because I really want to know. I am feared - with good reason. But you - of all people - dare to come here and stand before me, the mighty Caesar. What were you thinking?

You guaranteed my safety.

And you fell for that? Really? Because I'm going to have you killed now.

My finger was reaching for the V key at this moment. Lawl.

Relax. I'm fucking with you. We'll deal with Benny when the time comes.

I noticed Benny tied up, kneeling in one corner of the tent. His anal virginity in doubt.

In the meantime...You DO know why I wanted to meet you, right? A man nearly kills you, so you track across the breadth of the Mojave? You arrive on the Strip and waltz into the Lucky 38 like someone left you a key under the doormat? You visit the Tops, and next thing you know, the head of the Chairmen is fleeing the Strip like a whimpering little pup? When you set your mind to something, you get results. I like that.

But I don't like you.

the question is...are you ready to get started?

What were you looking to start?

The time is fast approaching when my Legion will assault the great dam and invade the west. Before that happens, I want Mr. House knocked out of the game, a quick one-two punch - with you doing the punching.

I get it, it's a triple threat ring match, between the bear, the bull and the robot. Each side afraid of the third one backstabbing the other.

What do I have to do?

Down the hill, at the west edge of the camp, is an old building. It was here when the Fort was taken in 2277. Inside the building is a hatch, and inside that hatch are two steel doors that bear the sigil of the Lucky 38 casino. Now that same sigil is on the Platinum Chip Benny was carrying when we captured him. Isn't that interesting? Even more interesting, there's a slot about the same size as the Chip on the console that opens the hatch. So you know what I think? I think the Platinum Chip opens those doors - doors that can't be pried open or drilled open or blasted open. Because all that, I tried.

And once I'm inside?

I want you to destroy whatever you find in there. And then I want you to come back here and tell me about it. So go to the building and take this fucking Platinum Chip with you. My Legionaries will meet you there, with your weapons and equipment. Talk to Benny on your way out. He knows I'm going to let you decide how he dies. Maybe you want to remind him.

You have no one to blame but yourself.

Did I say I blamed society? I know why I'm here, baby. Do you? Down to brass tacks. How'd you meet and greet with Baldie go?

He said I get to decide how you die.

Try not to smile so wide, baby. You might break your mouth. So which way you leaning?

Do you have a preference?

Yeah, to die in my sleep at a ripe old age after a marathon session of hey-hey with thirty sex-starved broads. You'll set that up? Look, I ain't a harbor for illusions. I ain't expecting to get out of this shin-dig alive. That's why I'm trying to hand you my scheme, baby. It's called having a legacy.

Probably referring to the bunker.

What happened to you after you fled the Tops?

I prefer the term "relocated". It took every Stealth Boy I had to cross the river at Cottonwood Cove. That was a close shave, riding a boat full of Legion boys. Once I was across, I changed into a uniform I swiped off a dead Legionary outside Nelson. Tried to sneak into the bunker, but that didn't work out. They found the Chip. I wasn't gonna tell them what it was used for, but...let's say they were persuasive.

What do you think I should do with it?

Sure, Baldie wants you to go down in the bunker and destroy whatever Mr. House stashed there. You don't want to do that, baby. Whatever's down in that bunker is the key to the city called Vegas. So here's what you do...You go down there and use the Chip to do whatever Mr. House woulda wanted you to do. And when you get back to the Strip, you find Yes Man. I made it so that cat can't help but be helpful, dig?

I already knew of that option anyway. I remembered that Mr. House claimed the whole Vegas three casino owners were once tribesmen. I'm curious, what was Benny's tribe like before Mr. House found them.

Was you tribe always called the Chairmen?

Nah, in the way-back we called ourselves the Boot Riders. Silly name, but that's how we rode the Mojave, dig? - on our feet.

Suddenly, something crossed my mind. A Fucking HORSE DLC! THAT'S SLAM DUNK RIGHT THAR'!

We we nomadic badasses, not to be trifled with. A gang of ruffians, with a certain panache. When House gave us the Tops to renovate, his robots dropped off boxes full of suits and ties and wingtip shoes. Told us we were the "Chairmen" now.

That caused an uproar. But I said "the name sticks." Ciao to the old ways, baby - time to swing in style. If the shoes fit, you wear them.

How did Mr. House introduce himself?

We were east of Vegas when the first Securitron we ever saw rolled up on us. We junked it in a minute flat. The next day twenty roll up. So we listened. Said we'd been selected. Vegas needed us to defend it. In exchange, we'd get cushy digs, full stomachs, medical treatment. Everything a nomad never gets, in other words. Most of the tribe thought we should say no. I thought it was the best idea ever.

Alright, he satisfied my curiosity. I poked around Caesar's tent and stumbled upon a Slave Ledger Book detailing the past conquests of tribes he won. And how the assimilated them, some allies, into slaves.

Could be useful. Inside his bedroom is a broken Auto-Doc.

A nearby footlocker is very hard to pick, but I managed. Inside are 2000 caps, a Power Fist and a T51-B Power Armor Helmet. Not a bad present for Veronica. I exited the camp and made my way to the bunker. The guards inside returned my belongings and allowed me free reign. I held out the Platinum Chip in my palm and wondered at its possibilities.

That chip of yours...I wouldn't wager it on blackjack. Unless the dealer has a five or six showing.

Can you tell me about this Platinum Chip?

Yeah. It's not for poker. I've never seen anything quite like it, but I can tell you it looks like it was fabricated before the War, and not at a mint. Some kind of tech.. I'm gonna say mid-2200s. Hold onto it. Might be your lucky chip.

I slot in the Platinum Chip into the console. A secret passageway opens to the bunker below.

It's time.

 

[Havoc]

About the slaves in Cottonwood... you can buy them out.

 

[anus_pounder]

I have to admit, looking at Caesar....he is very underwhelming. I expected more tbh.

 

[SoupNazi]

I thought it was perfect. Here's this mighty leader of a gigantic Legion, admired and revered by his troops that deem him a God and never or rarely question his will, killing themselves for him. But then you meet him and he's this old man without a real drive, with medical problems and no concrete scheme to go along with, with his Legate doing most of the work. I think Lanius must have known how bad Caesar was of a leader, but he was also a great symbol. That's why he doesn't try to take over, and more or less happily leads the onslaught of the Legion himself.

 

[Felix]

Also, please do Yes Man ending good sir.

 

[RK47]

What could be behind these two doors? Other than radiation, that is. Geiger counter is steadily increasing by 1 per second. Better settle shit quick.

Looks like Mr. House is already here.

I see that you reached your destination safely. Shall we get to work?

Why did you send me here?

The Platinum Chip is a data-storage device. I need you to manually upload the data from the Chip to the facility's primary computer. There's a terminal at the other end of this facility. There's a complication. While I can broadcast to this screen, I can't control any of the facility's systems. That means I can't deactivate its security bots...most of which appears to be active, according to the status board I'm looking at.

What will you do with your Securitrons?

My army will do what an army does best - defend territory from invaders...and maintain order.

Right. As if the Strip isn't safe enough already with the NCR camped outside....unless if you want the NCR out.

We'll see what happens.

I like to think you have enough sense to do the right thing. The rewards for doing so are immense...as are the punishments for not doing so.

If I blow up the bunker, the Legion will have less problem taking over the Dam. If I activate the bunker, Mr. House will have easier time in driving other forces out of New Vegas, including the NCR. I think with what has happened so far, I'll go with the latter. I hacked the nearby terminal and canceled the security alerts for robots and turrets, now all I have to do is run quick to avoid getting too badly radiated.

Time to settle this. I plug the Chip into the socket.

A loud clanking of metals can be heard. And a Securitron display changed to a military man. I think I've just upgraded their software. Now to make my exit and hope Caesar's men didn't notice. On my way out, they seized my weapons and chemicals once more. I smuggled my pistols and explosives as usual.

Wow. Fooled him too? Amazing.

There are rewards for doing as I command. Today, your reward is vengeance. You get to decide how Benny dies. Go to Benny, let him know what you've decided. My Praetorians will perform the execution - unless you want to perform it yourself.

Thank you, Caesar.

Consider it the first of many bestowments.

So baby, what did you find down there?

Hundreds of Securitrons. All of them upgraded now, just like Mr. House wants.

So all this time the old man had an entire army on lay-away? Clever player. Just imagine the look on Baldie's face when those Securitrons come pouring out on judgment day! I'd pay to have that bronzed. So all you gotta do now is talk to Yes Man, figure out how to set things in motion. Make Vegas a town I woulda been proud of, baby. Let it swing.

I have to decide what happens to you now.

I see. And how's that gonna happen?

I could crucify him...duel him in arena, or let the Legion deal with him. Or being a pussy I am, help him escape....but nahhhh. We gave that to him in the Tops.

I've decided to kill you here and now.

I see. Keep it simple, hey? Around here, it's one of the better options...

I could crucify you instead.

Don't do that, baby. Not crucifixion. I could be up there for days with those twisted creeps laughing and pointing.

Fine, I'd shoot him right now with his hands tied. Just like how it was in Goodsprings, with the situation reversed. Fair's fair.

Close your eyes, if you want.

Nah, I'd rather see it coming. Do it baby. Make it clean.

I felt my vision blurred as I held my 10mm pistol with both hands. Was it pity?

My vision cleared after that momentary lapse and realized it was a post-Mentats drugs effect wearing off after taking it in the bunker. Bye, Benny. It's been nice knowing you.

Let's press on, shall we? As I was telling you before, I want Mr. House out of the picture. You have interest in his death, too. If he knows that you destroyed his gadgets beneath the Fort, he will strike back. You know where to find him. How he dies, I leave up to you.

What is that machine in your tent?

It's called an Auto-Doc. As the name suggests, it's an automated physician - more or less. It can treat broken bones, cuts, scrapes. Sometimes I bestow its use upon someone I favor. Makes for a powerful gift, in a culture that forbids painkillers and is largely ignorant of medical science.

I've heard rumors of your Legate, Lanius. What's his story?

Lanius is the greatest of my battlefield commanders. Some might call him a great man, but I'm not sure he qualifies. Once, he was the greatest warrior of the Hidebarks, a tribe of the Arizona. Maniacal in battle. Sometimes he'd ambush Legion patrols by himself. When, after several months we found and surrounded the Hidebarks' camp, their Chieftain raised a banner of surrender. The warrior who was not yet Lanius went insane with rage. He struck down his Chieftain and attacked his own tribe. He killed fifteen before they brought him down. He didn't die, obviously. I had him tended to. He was maimed, most of face torn off. It was days before he regained consciousness. When he did, I went to his bedside, and showed him the helmet I'd had forged to cover his face. I said he could have it if he'd fight for me. He accepted on condition he be allowed to kill the surviving males of his tribe. I said, make it the adult males and you have a deal.

He sounds more like a savage than a general.

Lanius is savage. Savagely loyal, too, but only to me - he has no love for the Legion. But this has its uses. He has no attachment to his men, no compunction about battlefield losses. All he cares about is destroying the enemy. When another legatus or Centurion fails to achieve results, I send Lanius to make things right. His first step is to beat the failed commander to death in front of his assembled troops. Then he orders the ritual of decimatio.

What is that?

It means "decimation" but in ancient Rome the word had a very specific meaning - a punishment for cowardice. The legionaries are lined up in ranks. Every tenth man steps forward and is beaten to death by his brothers. It instills a certain...robust obedience.

Sick fucks.

Will he lead the assault on Hoover Dam?

Yes. This time my Legionaries will be more frightened of the commander behind them than the enemy before them. There will be no failure this time, no retreat, no years of gathering slaves and resources for another assault. With Lanius to drive the Legion forward, the dam will be taken. It will be our bridgehead across the Colorado.

How did you lose the first battle of Hoover Dam?

It's not going to happen again. That's all I have to say about it.

What do you think of the NCR?

Do you want my opinion as a former citizen, or future conqueror? Actually, my opinion's the same either way. As a young man I was taught to venerate President Tandi of Shady Sands. "The Founding Mother of New California Republic." Did you know her presidency lasted 52 years? And that her father, Aradesh, was the Republic's first president? Does that sound like democracy to you, or hereditary dictatorship?

President Tandi was voted into office each time.

Because the council didn't dare oppose her. She was too popular. She had the people's love. So things ran smoothly, more or less. And as soon as she was gone, as soon as there really could be "democracy" - what happened then? Ever since losing its queen, the NCR has been weaker, more diffuse. Democracy has been its weakness, not its strength.

He does have a point. Greed and non-unified cause tend to splinter a nation, especially in resource-starved wastelands.

How is the NCR weak?

Greed runs rampant. The government is corrupt, accepting bribes from Brahmin barons and landowners, to the detriment of citizens. The NCS is a loose conglomerate of individuals looking out for themselves. It's lost virtue. No one cares about the collective, the greater good. It's not built to last. It's just hastening the inevitable.

I don't see how his solution is more palatable.

Surely, the NCR is a powerful foe?

Of course. The most powerful my Legion has faced. Also the first to which I am ideologically opposed. Until now, every tribe I've conquered has been so backwards and stunted, enslavement has been a gift bestowed upon them. My conquest of the Mojave will be a glorious triumph, marking the transition of the Legion from a basically nomadic tribe to a genuine empire. Just as my namesake campaigned in Gaul before he crossed the Rubicon, so have I campaigned, and will cross the Colorado.

A total nut job and savage fanatics. Nice alternative to corrupt NCR.

Why is the Legion so...strange?

I used Imperial Rome as the model for my Legion precisely because it was so foreign, so alien. I'd seen what had become of the NCR's attempt to emulate the culture of Pre-War America - the infighting, the corruption. Rome was a highly militarized autocracy that effectively integrated the foreign cultures it conquered. It dedicated its citizens to something higher than themselves - to the idea of Rome itself. In Rome, I found a template for a society equal to the challenges of the post-apocalyptic world - a society that could and would survive. A society that could prevent mankind from fracturing and destroying itself in this new world, by establishing a new Pax Romana.

I think the writer just jizzed in their pants after writing this line. If this is the main selling point of the Legion to the player, I'm not buying it.

What does "Pax Romana" mean?

It means a nationalist, imperialist, totalitarian, homogeneous culture that obliterates the identity of every group it conquers. Long term stability at all costs. The individual has no value beyond his utility to the state, whether as an instrument of war or production.

So you'll destroy the NCR because you hate its inefficiencies?

No. I'll destroy it because it's inevitable that is be destroyed. It's Hegelian Dialectics, not personal animosity.

Wikipedia says:

Hegelian dialectic, usually presented in a three-fold manner, was stated by Heinrich Moritz Chalybäus as comprising three dialectical stages of development: a thesis, giving rise to its reaction, an antithesis, which contradicts or negates the thesis, and the tension between the two being resolved by means of a synthesis.

Although this model is often named after Hegel, he himself never used that specific formulation. Hegel ascribed that terminology to Kant.[25] Carrying on Kant's work, Fichte greatly elaborated on the synthesis model, and popularized it.

On the other hand, Hegel did use a three-valued logical model that is very similar to the antithesis model, but Hegel's most usual terms were: Abstract-Negative-Concrete. Sometimes Hegel would use the terms, Immediate-Mediated-Concrete. Hegel used these terms hundreds of times throughout his works.[26]

The formula, Thesis-Antithesis-Synthesis, does not explain why the Thesis requires an Antithesis. However, the formula, Abstract-Negative-Concrete, suggests a flaw in any initial thesis—it is too abstract and lacks the negative of trial, error and experience. The same applies to the formula, Immediate-Mediated-Concrete. For Hegel, the Concrete, the Synthesis, the Absolute, must always pass through the phase of the Negative, that is, Mediation. This is the actual essence of what is popularly called Hegelian Dialectics.

To describe the activity of overcoming the negative, Hegel also often used the term Aufhebung, variously translated into English as "sublation" or "overcoming," to conceive of the working of the dialectic. Roughly, the term indicates preserving the useful portion of an idea, thing, society, etc., while moving beyond its limitations. (Jacques Derrida's preferred French translation of the term was relever).[27]

Mindfucked.

"Hegelian Dialectics?" What are those?

How do I put this basically enough? It's a philosophical theory, the kind you might encounter if you took time to read some books. The fundamental premise is to envision history as a sequence of "dialectical" conflicts. Each dialectic begins with a proposition, a thesis..which inherently contains, or creates, its opposite - an antithesis.

Something like ESF and RPGCodexr, eh?

Thesis and antithesis. The conflict is inevitable. But the resolution of the conflict yields something new - a synthesis - eliminating the flaws in each, leaving behind common elements and ideas.

Hence, Best Thread Ever part X in Year 2050?

So what's 'dialectic' about you and the NCR?

The bombs wiped the slate clean. Human civilization descended to a level of ignorance that effectively set our cultural progress back to zero. The NCR has all the problems of the ancient Roman Republic - extreme bureaucracy, corruption, extensive senatorial infighting. Just as with the ancient Republic, it is natural that a military force should conquer and transform the NCR into a military dictatorship. Thesis and antithesis. The Colorado River is my Rubicon. The NCR Council will be eradicated, but the new synthesis will change the Legion as well..from a basically nomadic army to a standing military force that protects its citizens, and power of it's Dictator.

Riiiight.

How did you rise to power?

Ironically, I was born a Profligate myself, a citizen of the NCR. My family lived not far from the great Boneyard. After Raiders killed my father, my mother sought the Followers' protection. I was two years old. She found work at their library, cooking and cleaning. I learned how to read and soon I was taking courses, free of charge.

You were a Follower of the Apocalypse?

Oh yes, raised in that tradition. And the teaching stuck. I was taught it was my responsibility to bring the torch of knowledge to the wastes. I may have taken the torch part more literally than they intended.

What changed you from a Follower to a dictator?

When I was 20, the Followers sent me East to Grand Canyon. It was my first expedition, just me and a physician named Calhoun. As an anthropologist and linguist, my assignment was to learn the dialects of the Grand Canyon tribes. What a fucking waste of time!

Why would it be a waste of time?

If you think it's worthwhile to make smart people learn how to talk like backwards savages, you're a Follower of the Apocalypse...or an idiot. Anyway, we met up with a Mormon missionary who already knew a bunch of dialects - Joshua Graham. He was supposed to teach me. But before that went too far, the Blackfoot tribe captured us, to hold us for ransom. They were a backward bunch. But the real problem was they didn't know how to fight.

What was wrong with the Blackfoot?

They were at war with seven other tribes, each just as pissant as they were. But outnumbered like that, they weren't going to last long. It's one thing to be taken hostage, another to be lashed to a sinking ship. So over Calhoun's objections, I decided to take certain steps. I taught them how to use the guns they already had - how to strip and clean, how to breathe when pulling the trigger, how to reload ammunition. They looked at me like I was some kind of sorcerer. So I taught them how to make explosives, and started drilling them on small unit tactics. If there's anything I learned as Followers of the Apocalypse it's that there's a lot of good joining internet counterstrike clans.

What happened after you trained them?

Divide et impera - divide and conquer. I led the Blackfoot against the Ridgers, their weakest enemy. When they refused to surrender, I ordered every man, woman and child killed. When next we surrounded the Kaibabs and they likewise refused...I took one of their envoys to the Ridgers' village and showed him the corpse piles. This was new to the tribes you see. They played at war, see the victory screen, a little rape and pillage there, a little ransoming there. I showed them total warfare. Like I said, there's a lot you can learn from Starcraft. The Kaibabs joined me, and the Fredonians after that - all the pissant tribes, with names should be forgotten. I knew from the start I'd need to eradicate this plague of tribal identities, replacing them with a monolithic culture, a uniform identity. So that's what I did, once my confederation of tribes was large enough. I crowned myself Caesar and created a single Great Tribe - my Legion. I sent Calhoun back West with a message that I should not be interfered with. Joshua Graham, the Mormon interpreter, stayed with me and served as my first Legatus.

And since forming the Legion, all you've done is conquer other tribes?

That's right. Decades of warfare, absorbing lesser tribes, gathering power. Forging the dross into a vast, razor sharp scythe. My Legion's expansion has never ceased. Much of the Utah and Colorado, and all of Arizona and New Mexico, are mine. We have cities of our own, but nothing compared to Vegas. Finally, my Legion will have its Rome.

Fine, I'll eliminate Mr. House for you.

Good. I don't know what kind of security he has inside the Lucky 38 but if you can find a way of catching him off guard, do so.

I left the tent. That man talks too much. He did not suspect a thing. That fool. Time to report back to Mr. House. But first...

V-Chan~~~

Whole future of New Vegas seems like it's up in the air. Guess I should wait things out before buying a condo in the Ultra-Luxe, huh?

I'm ready to take you to Hidden Valley.

Great. Thanks. Thank you. I'll encourage people to name their non-ugly children after you. Seriously.

Why name other people's children when we can name OURS? GYAHAHAHAHAHH!

Wait, that did not happen. So we're leaving the Fortification Hill, having carried out Mr. House's instructions and the Platinum Chip in hand. I gave the crucified soldier near the exit a mercy killing before I left with a silenced .22 pistol.

Rest in peace, brother.

I debated whether I should leave Caesar alive or not. But I figured it wouldn't matter, someone else will replace him. The Legion is too strong to take on alone. I need an army support to take them on in Hoover Dam. Maybe the Brotherhood of Steel will listen to reason. I set my Pip-Boy compass towards the Hidden Valley, home of Veronica's Brotherhood of Steel.

 

[laclongquan]

My first thought is this: Who wouldnt want to take control of New Vegas themselves? Why leave it to others to remake it in their own images when you can do it? So it's naturally an attractive option.

Then color me green and call me paranoiac but my second thought goes like this : "Hold on there! Isnt it too pat? Install the Yes Man onto mainframe then rule Vegas by command it? Why would Yes Man listen to me? Because it said so, right? Why should we trust it? Any way to verify its claim?"

And Third Thought knocking: "Remember V.V? That red hot chic in Hollywood? She talk us into doing all kind of things for her and what she pay us? Money? Sex? Weapons? Power? Nada. Three poems. A picture. Now why would Yes Man remind me of V.V? IS it because it scratch the greed itch in us while V.V scratch the romantic/lust itch?"

There you have it.

 

[anus_pounder]

Destroy the brohood.

 

[Infantryman]

I would have voted NCR, but seeing this choice stands no chance, I've voted for Yes Man. I mean they're corrupt and all, but they still seem to be the only faction resembling good or lawful guys.

Don't let the video screens and computer terminals fool you. I'm flesh and blood, not silicon.

(Medicine) The lifespan you're claiming is impossible, except for ghouls and super mutants

How much medical knowledge do you need to know that? If he's really a flesh, then he's probably some kind of Master-like mutie.

 

[SCO]

Jesus christ is the [skill or attribute] thing moronic. Any mod to turn that shit off?

 

[Brother None]

I thought it was perfect. Here's this mighty leader of a gigantic Legion, admired and revered by his troops that deem him a God and never or rarely question his will, killing themselves for him. But then you meet him and he's this old man without a real drive, with medical problems and no concrete scheme to go along with, with his Legate doing most of the work. I think Lanius must have known how bad Caesar was of a leader, but he was also a great symbol. That's why he doesn't try to take over, and more or less happily leads the onslaught of the Legion himself.

That would've been a great angle, Joshua Graham and then Legatus Lanius just using Caesar as a distant symbol, a figurehead of sorts. But nothing in the game actually indicates that. You're supposed to buy that this boorish, uncharismatic dick had the willpower to drive together many bands of raiders and make them cosplay as Romans.

And then add how hilariously stupidly evil they are, with their sexism (unknown elsewhere in the wasteland), crossing up enemies, slave-driving (with those funny slave models) and brutality. I thought New Vegas was supposed to be less black-and-white? The friggin' Enclave in Fallout 3 is more reasonable than these guys. I don't mean Eden and his idiocy, I mean colonel Autumn, who really "only" wants to hold the sole source of pure water to create a powerbase and drive out the Brotherhood of Steel and pacify the region (which is great considering all the mutants wandering around and the BoS' inability to do much about them). He actually offers a valid alternate path but you can never side with him, only being given the stupidly good and stupidly evil options.

Most other factions in New Vegas are fine but their attempts to paint off NCR as "not that good" are really weak, while the Legion is hilariously evil. Fail. Big fail. Epic fail.

Wow. Fooled him too? Amazing.

Amazingly stupid. Why did he even give you the chip? He had it, he knew where the bunker is, the bunker's defenses in no way are capable of stopping the army he has handy.

FUCK THIS PART OF THE PLOT.

Does that sound like democracy to you, or hereditary dictatorship? Because the council didn't dare oppose her. She was too popular. She had the people's love. So things ran smoothly, more or less. And as soon as she was gone, as soon as there really could be "democracy" - what happened then? Ever since losing its queen, the NCR has been weaker, more diffuse. Democracy has been its weakness, not its strength.

AKA: "Yeah what a joke of a democracy right? She was really popular so she kept getting elected. And then she died and them being such a democracy is their weakness."

Holy crap. Each of those statements contradicts the others. That's some exceedingly crappy writing.

I think the writer just jizzed in their pants after writing this line. If this is the main selling point of the Legion to the player, I'm not buying it.

Yip. It's basically a self-indulgent stroke job for the Roman history buffs at Obsidian (read: J.E. Sawyer). Someone really should've told him it's a bad idea but whatevz.

And Third Thought knocking: "Remember V.V? That red hot chic in Hollywood? She talk us into doing all kind of things for her and what she pay us? Money? Sex? Weapons? Power? Nada. Three poems. A picture. Now why would Yes Man remind me of V.V? IS it because it scratch the greed itch in us while V.V scratch the romantic/lust itch?"

 

[SoupNazi]

I thought it was perfect. Here's this mighty leader of a gigantic Legion, admired and revered by his troops that deem him a God and never or rarely question his will, killing themselves for him. But then you meet him and he's this old man without a real drive, with medical problems and no concrete scheme to go along with, with his Legate doing most of the work. I think Lanius must have known how bad Caesar was of a leader, but he was also a great symbol. That's why he doesn't try to take over, and more or less happily leads the onslaught of the Legion himself.

That would've been a great angle, Joshua Graham and then Legatus Lanius just using Caesar as a distant symbol, a figurehead of sorts. But nothing in the game actually indicates that. You're supposed to buy that this boorish, uncharismatic dick had the willpower to drive together many bands of raiders and make them cosplay as Romans.

Yeah, you're right. The latest update also proves this - somehow I never got the speech about Lanius in my playthrough.

Now I regret reading this.

 

[Brother None]

Sorry to hear it dude

 

[RK47]

Fuck. My typing arms hurt, Caesar's a bitch to transcript. But be glad that is the LAST time we'll speak with him. We head back to Cottonwood Cove and make good on our promise to free the slaves.

By captures, do you mean slaves?

No, no, no - they haven't yet earned the right to be called slaves! Those three in the pen are captures, nothing more. I'm a slavemaster, so I know what I'm talking about.

.....OK. Whatever you say.

Back at the Fort, I'd have those three half-broken and well on their way. But this is just a holding area, so all I do is assess their fitness and decide whether to send them on.

Thanks to the poster mentioning a diplomatic solution to this quest, and the cost of it is so cheap.

How much would it cost to buy them?

It's a weak bunch, to be honest, I'd rather have extra currency to buy supplies or better captures off traders. There's a boy, too old to be trained as a Legionary. Normally they have to die, but he's too frail to make trouble. The old woman's dried up, but she could keep house or do gardening, - if she can learn to keep her mouth shut. The girl's the only one of real value, young enough to breed, not hideous to look at. What's your offer for the lot?

A 50 Speech option can bluff the slaver into thinking they're diseased. But my Speech is too low for that.

I can pay you 300 caps.

A fair price. Always best to have caps on hand in case traders drop by. Here's the key to their collars.

I set them free and plot to the destroy the whole camp. I scouted for the perfect sniping location to pick them off one by one....and found something interesting.

The truck carries a huge load of radioactive materials and is perched on an overlook over Cottonwood Cove.

Barrels of radioactive waste rolled down the hill, my Geiger counter goes wild. I peered through my sniper scope and watched in satisfaction as the younger Legionaries dropped dead from rad poisoning. The whole camp will soon to follow. I beckoned Veronica and ED-E to move on. We're headed to Veronica's home, the Hidden Valley.

Heading northwest from HELIOS One towards the Hidden Valley turns out to be a mistake, however. The pass is plagued by giant radscorpions and its family. The small ones aren't so dangerous, but the giant black ones pack a deadly poison sting and super-tough carapace. Point blank sniper shots are our best bets.

We later learned it was called the Scorpion Gulch for that reason. Once we made through that pass, the Hidden Valley comes into view. A violent wind kicking up dust storms, making it hard to find our way. I later learned this is an artificial dust storm created by super powered fans from underground. With Veronica's guidance, we find the correct bunker entrance with no problem.

The first steel door in the bunker is locked, but should not be a problem for my lockpicks, but Veronica says she'll handle it.

We gave you a password, Veronica. It's for your safety.

I know where you live, Ramos. Open up.

There was a moment's silence before the door finally opened leading down a bunker. A hulking Paladin in Power Armor greets us.

Listen up. I'm in charge of security around here, and I can't say I'm too happy having an outsider waltzing around. But since you came in with Veronica, I'm inclined to cut you a little slack. Just behave yourself and we won't have any problems, okay? Oh, and the Elder's going to want to talk to you. He's on the second level. Just take a right once you get down there.

Turrets and the familiar Brotherhood banners adorn the wall. The whole bunker felt cold as each armor-clad members of the Brotherhood passed through its halls. Sounds of shooting in a distant coming from a firing range. Lesser recruits walk in basic combat armor and laser rifles. The seniors, clad in recognizable power armor carries various sort of heavy weapons from Gatling to Gauss rifles, a reminder that despite of their small numbers, the Brotherhood is still a formidable opponent.

I made my way down to the second level of the bunker to speak with the Elder.

When Paladin Ramos informed me that Veronica was approaching with an outsider in tow, at first I didn't know what to think. After giving the matter some thought, however, I've decided that an outsider could be of use to me right now.

I seem to be always in the right place, in the right time. Call it Courier's Luck or something.

However, I will not force you to help us. Should you refuse, you'd be allowed to leave here, though you'd remain Veronica's responsibility. What do you say, outsider? Are you willing to help us?

Making an alliance with this powerful faction could be useful against the Legion.

I'll help you.

Then allow me to explain our situation. This bunker is currently locked down, allowing no entry or exit, with you being one of the few exceptions. In exceptional cases, teams are sent out to investigate sites or retrieve materials deemed too important to ignore. Three such teams have gone missing recently, and the news of their disappearance has not yet been widely spread to avoid undue concern. In order to maintain peace, and adhere to the strictures of the lockdown, I need to send someone else to discover what happened to them.

I'll begin looking immediately.

I'm glad I can count on you. Oh, and one other thing. The patrols each had a holotape detailing their missions that you can use to track them. The shielding of the bunker prevents us from actively tracking them, but their positions should show up on your map once you get to the surface. Should our worst fears become realized, please bring back all three of the holotapes from the patrols. Otherwise, bring our brothers home. I've given the order that you be given access to some of the equipment our scouts and patrols have scavenged over the years.

OK, that's nice. But before we go...this is the actual reason why we're here.

We'll know in a second. I wanted to talk to you.

Veronica, tell me this isn't about -

Yes, goddamn it, it is. But you're going to hear me out this time.

We've been through this.

The things I've seen now. Other groups succeeding where we fail. It's not too late for us.

We outlasted Oblivion. We'll outlast these upstarts.

Waiting in the hole for everyone else to die.

If we must.

This is a dead end for us.

I see no evidence of that. Nor do I see anyone out there with a solution to our problems.

How could you? You're too scared to look. *turns away* Let's go. We're wasting our time.

We walked out of the Elder's Chamber before Veronica finally spoke up.

I'd slap him around, but he stood at my parents' wedding. Plus he used to make excuses to get me out of my punishment when I'd slept through Head Scribe Taggart's lectures. Figure I owe him that. *sigh* He means well.

Good intentions don't justify marching the Brotherhood to its death.

No, but it does make it easier to forgive him. He's just misguided. It's not too late to change his mind.

You think he'll listen at all?

He's a stubborn old man, but when it comes down to it, he's got our best interests at heart. If he sees some indisputable sign we're on the wrong cause, he won't ignore it.

What could we bring to him that would change his mind?

I don't know. I don't know.

I KNOW! A baby boy! Let's fuck!

We'd need something that shows the Brotherhood will fail. Or that it can do better a different way.

Age of Decadence?

The only thing that'd get his attention is technology? Huh. Maybe Father Elijah had the right idea.

What is it you are trying to accomplish?

That's my question to the Elder. All these years, the Brotherhood has collected weapons technology. And for what? To keep it out people's hands? That clearly hasn't worked. To defend ourselves? We can't compete with the NCR's numbers. Or the Legion's. We're fighting a war for a lost cause. If we're going to survive, we have to find a role in society. Attract new members.

How would you propose to do that?

Look at the Followers of the Apocalypse. They use their expertise to improve people's lives. They train them to be self-sufficient. That expertise cultivates respect and gratitude. Spreads their ideals. Draws talent to their cause. They make friends like we make enemies. But they don't know a fraction of what we know. If we took on their role, we could stand up to anyone. We wouldn't have to hide.

You said something about Father Elijah?

Our Elder before McNamara. He had a nose for recovering lost tech. He'd send Scribes out into the desert chasing whatever leads he found. There were a few he only trusted me with. I can think at least one that'd prove my point. if it still exists. There's a comm terminal not too far from here I'd use to access messages from him. If we go there I can pull up his research on it.

Let's head out.

I'm with you. Being around here isn't the same anymore.

 

[RK47]

As we prepared to leave the bunker, a gruff looking Paladin approached us.

Name's Hardin. I'm the Head Paladin of this chapter, and I think we might be able to help each other out. I don't know what the Elder talked to you about, but I can tell you this chapter is in trouble, and he's at the center of it. Are you willing to listen to what I have to say?

Sure, go ahead.

As you may have already heard, this entire base is under a state of lockdown. No one goes out except small patrols at night. Most of the chapter has been sealed in here for years, and those few who were outside when the lockdown was initiated are forbidden from returning. Morale has plummeted as time has gone by, and many of our current paladins haven't even seen combat outside of training simulations. And all because of the Elder's explicit orders that no one be allowed in or out. The only way things will change is if a new Elder is installed.

Have you tried bringing this up with the Elder yourself?

Of course I have. Many times, in fact. The Elder has an open door policy, and will listen to advice on any subject, save this one. He refuses to see that our isolation is slowly weakening us. Aside from being our duty, going out on missions is what kept us strong. And because he fails to see that, he must be replaced.

Uh oh, inner faction conflict.

How do you propose to do that?

I don't know. I've gone through our records dozens of times looking for a precedent regarding the dismissal of an Elder and come up with nothing. The people who are most likely to know how it could be done are also some of McNamara's strongest supporter, so they refuse to help me. Which is why we're having this conversation. An outsider such as yourself would arouse less suspicion asking questions about such matters. The fact that the Elder has some tasks for you means his faithful won't suspect you, and you have a line open to the man himself. In short, you're in perfect position to help me. Will you at least think about it?

I don't wish to contribute to a civil war inside the Brotherhood. I think I'll promise him nothing. Let's try to convince the current Elder with Veronica's way.

I'll see what I can do.

Hardin stepped away but before we could have a moment to ourselves, a group of paladins stepped forward. Turns out they were Veronica's ex-BROfriends.

The two of you may have the Elder fooled, but we know better. Veronica has always twisted the Founder's principles to her own ends. We will not stand idly by and allow her to corrupt our Elder's thinking.

The three of them stepped away after delivering the threat, misguided fools.

I'm sorry about that, just because I love them, doesn't mean some of them are assholes.

I made a stop at the firing range to see what they have to offer.

YES! This is Veronica's or any Unarmed Expert ultimate weapon! The non-epic name does not convey enough the awesomeness of this fist. Imagine a punching glove which launches an exploding bullet upon impact! Every punch is guaranteed to have a chance to knock your enemy down. IF they survive a hit that is. It's in a bad condition but I've saved up four weapon repair kits for this occasion. Also, I snagged a set of power armor from the Elder's room for Veronica.

Hits harder than a non-sneak attack sniper rifle at point blank range. You can fist me anytime, V-Chan!

The shack Ronnie mentioned contains a crapload of empty whiskey bottles, a corpse on a bed, and a single terminal. I really don't know why she didn't bother to clean it up. We downloaded the data without too much issues.

Let's see what we've got here...Okay, this is the one I was thinking of. The pulse gun. Although maybe the rangefinder could work too. And it looks like the NCR was onto some miracle farming technology.

Tell me about the rangefinder.

It's a targeting device for some kind of doomsday weapon based at HELIOS One. It was lost sometimes after the War. We held HELIOS One for a time. Lost a lot of people defending it. Too many. All for this weapon they never got working. If it turns out to be a dud, it'd show how flawed our goals have been. Father Elijah said he thinks a scavenger might have sold it on the Strip.

What about the Pulse Gun?

Electromagnetical weapon from before the Great War. Experimental. It never saw mass production. But they were building it as a countermeasure to power armor, which they feared the Chinese were developing. Supposedly a prototype was being housed at Nellis. Imagine what it could do to the Brotherhood. We'd be on equal footing with any idiot with a gun.

The farming technology sounds boring, I decided to investigate HELIOS One's rangefinder.

The rangefinder sounds promising.

They defended HELIOS One like it was their last stand. Didn't even know if there was anything worth defending. How could there be, with all we lost? Even if it did work, it'd be under NCR control now. So it'd either prove our goals are wrong or we're incapable of pursuing them.

So where do we start?

There's a gift shop in the Strip that deals in Pre-War antiques.

Let's go find it.

I like the way you think.

Me too. Wanna fuck?

Suddenly ED-E interrupts our hot rising sexual tension with yet another playback log.

Download Complete. Begin Recording. Navarro outpost scientists, I am glad that ED-E has reached you. You will find several databanks of information on this machine. Please handle this information with the utmost care as it represents the sum total of the results of my research on the Duraframe Eyebots. There are also several databanks with information on my research into Poseidon Energy and some projects they were working on in the Mojave area.

Riiight. ED-E's questline involves getting someone to say a key word. The problem here it's not really rewarding, nor involving to the player. So I just went along with it. We'll head over the Strip on the next update, and also hand over the Platinum Chip to Mr. House.

 

[anus_pounder]

Oh damn, looks like this chapter of the brohood ain't dieing out. Too bad.

Plz continue.

 

[Dragula]

Except for Danny Trejo, who's awful.

Do not backtalk Machete.