What If Black Cat Was A 3,000+ Year Old Alien? (LR: Nemesis)

[Crooked Bee]

The thread title made me lol.

 

[Black Cat]

Well, this means that now you've got to man-review Majestic as far as boyfriends go.

He just spend three thousand years trying to kill her while she saved the world by herself while fighting both the bad guys and the superheroes. That's not a good first impression, really. Alright, so maybe if she had stoped wisecracking and being extreme he would have had an easier time listening to her. But still.

Then there is "Hmpf. I was aiming for you, the lizards just got in the way. Really! It's not like I care for you or anything. Baka." Tsundere superheroes, really? That's pretty cute, and western comics just became 20% cooler for me. And given he just took a battleship thingie's main gun to the face and kind of shrugged it off he was probably not even trying to kill her fo' realz. Guys gonna guy, etc. I hate you so much I'm going to spend three thousand years pursuing you so I can save you every time you are about to get a face full of space lizard kill you. Baka.

And he actually said he was sorry when he noticed he had been a majestic jerk to her. That puts him right there with, I don't know, 0.5% of malekind as someone who can actually say he's sorry when he should be sorry, instead of never saying he's sorry when he's actually sorry and instead saying he's sorry when he actually believes you want to hear him say he's sorry. He could do without the steroids, though. He kind of looks like a flying wardrobe with a cape. One huge wardrobe with a cape.

He looks pretty devoted and proper, in any case. And I don't hate moralfags, as I said elsewhere. I just believe they should go and do shit instead of criticizing other people because they don't go and do shit. So I don't mind a guy who goes white knighting around the universe and actually does shit, and kick the bad guy's tails. Which only happens in comics, as my big mouth would have gotten me hurt or worse, much worse, if I had to depend on the virility of nice guys. "Hurting a girl is wrong. So, uhm, don't hurt her Otherwise I will totally, like, cry. And tell all my friends you are jerk, yeah. That should teach you. And please don't hurt me either. Please. Don't look me like that. *whimper*"

So, like, yeah. He's boyfriend material, I guess. A bit too, uhm, serious, though I guess Nemesis going around wisecracking and being antiheroic wouldn't look so cool without a straightman to be her foil. The problem with people like that, though, is that they actually believe you should be nice and good and heroic regardless of how much of a jerk everyone's to you, instead of going and beating the jerk out of them for being so to someone who was actually idealistic and nice.

He should be making her more gifts, though. We have gone quite some issues already and he hasn't given her anything. Not even a rose, even. Not even a chocolate bar, or a heart shaped box of bonbons. WTF is this? She should kryptonite his ass, or whatever it is that guy's weakness.

And yes, that last paragraph was a joke. Stop painting me like some kind of capitalist monster already.

 

[Sceptic]

Awesome post Black Cat :D (and yeah I actually fell for your materialistic paragraph joke...)

Good comic too, I approve. This is one of the least derpy. For some reason there's been a majestic incline lately, what with the Abnett Majestic solo and now this.

BTW when you said you'd post Revelations, is that one of the 3-part that ended with Number of the Beast? If so, can you post the third one as well so we get the full build-up to the end of the world?

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

Alright, I'll post Armageddon mini-series first. It's going to be your first (albeit safe) introduction to many characters, including John Doran AKA Nigger Sue. That series has Void momentarily transporting various heroes to the World's End future to try and find someone who can prevent it.

 

[Sceptic]

That series has Void momentarily transporting various heroes to the World's End future to try and find someone who can prevent it.

And we all know how that worked out

Thanks for posting Armageddon too

Next page!

 

[Ulminati]

Not quite on the level of the Abnett issues, but still quite good.

The amount of watermelon-sized tits everywhere is a bit ridiculous, but I suppose they're tailored to the core demographic. I imagine every coda sister must be suffering from severe back pains, considering how much they jump about in thongs and bikini tops.

 

[Sceptic]

Yeah the watermelons are ridiculous, but TBH I usually stop noticing them after a couple of pages. Same with the chainmail bikinis.

 

[RK47]

Chainmail ? What chailmail, it was cloth. CLOTH, man!

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

It bears mention though that the most potent armour in Ancient Greece was the Linothorax, which was made of cloth.

Uploading the last part of this mini-series now.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

So Black Cat, who is the sexiest man in this mini-series, and what's the final rating for Majestic at the end of this series (he appears in the future, so you must do regular updates on his status)?

 

[Ulminati]

Gotta say this is an of Nemesis. Even moreso than her tasteful raping of Majestros from that world's end series.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

It is a shame WildStorm never got the chance to wrap up Majestic's quest to save Nemesis from TAO or whoever.

 

[Ulminati]

True dat.

As an aside, is there a page I missed with links to all your monocle Let's Read threads gathered into one? Or will I have to probe through google for them? I used to have them bookmarked, but I seem to have accidentally all my browser bookmarks when I got a little overzealous cleaning my computer.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

No page with links, unless someone has updated the LP Database.

 

[Ulminati]

No page with links, unless someone has updated the LP Database.

Posted the ones I could find to the LP database

 

[Sceptic]

That was pretty good

Wildstorm's really growing on me. There's plenty of derp, but when it's not derpy it's pretty good. Definitely a more interesting treatment of superheroes than usual.

 

[Undead Phoenix]

of Vaarna_Aarne. Horrible comic.


Looking at the silver lining - whatever you post next has gotta be


Well it better be.

 

[Random]

I enjoyed it, for what it's worth.

Now you can finally post your damn Top Ten.

 

[Holy Cow]

shit nigga black cat is H-A-W-T

 

[Black Cat]

So Black Cat, who is the sexiest man in this mini-series

Grifter. No, really. I mean it. He's quite charming and cute, and I love that good hearted rogue style.

and what's the final rating for Majestic at the end of this series (he appears in the future, so you must do regular updates on his status)?

He's a majestic backstabbing jerk. Really, that was uncalled for. He better gets started with the i'm sorry right now, otherwise not even other three thousand years will be enough to make up for it. So he can fight for what it is right and just when the victims are total strangers and all he has to do is punch and eyeshoot evil, but he goes and betrays his girlfriend just because daddy or, like, whomever the old guy was told him to? And that's fine because it was his duty and stuffies?

AHJSKLHNAHAGSUIRJEOIMAKJHNASKUAUASHSAIOJAFASJAKLHNSAEITYUAIASKJAS...!

... At least he is chivalrous and saved her, so let's not cryptonite the jerk just yet.

 

[Random]

Sir Daniel Fortesque's weakness is Cryptonite.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

Uh, BC? All Madge did was sleep with Zealot ONCE out of duty. Your super alter ego has slept with a large number of people inbetween that point and present day, and Madge doesn't say a single complaint about that.