NSFW Best Thread Ever [No SJW-related posts allowed]

[PulsatingBrain]

I wonder why they changed the American version so drastically

 

[damager]

I watched a documentary about it yesterday. The designer of the american version said, the original looks "like a bag of bread".

 

[Infinitron]

https://kotaku.com/people-who-havent-played-spider-man-are-mad-the-develop-1828724400

They say there’s no use crying over spilled milk, but what about spilled water? That, according to a contingent of Spider-Man fans, is worth a fuss of superheroic proportions.

The new Spider-Man game is mere days from leaping out of developer Insomniac’s imagination factory and into our living rooms, but even though it’s not out yet, people are already crying foul over a supposed graphical “downgrade.” It all began with a pair of screenshots from a scene where Spider-Man beats up a bunch of goons in a building that’s still under construction, much like the Spider-Man game was when the early trailer containing the scene came out last year.

You’ll notice that in the second shot, which is from 2018, there are vastly fewer puddles in the environment. This prompted players to investigate.

“What’s with the downgrade yet again?” one Twitter user asked Insomniac community director James Stevenson and creative director Bryan Intihar.

“It’s just a change in the puddle size, there’s no downgrade at all,” replied Insomniac from its official Twitter.

When another Twitter user said that Insomniac reduced the puddle’s size to cut down on resource usage and keep the frame rate up, Insomniac replied that the game has “plenty of other places with tons of puddles.”

Naturally, the whole exchange took nanoseconds to become a meme.

https://www.somethingawful.com/video-game-article/spider-patch-puddle/

Patch Notes: Spider-Man

Graphics

All puddles reduced in size by 12% to free up resources and improve overall performance

Puddle-space reflection quality increased by 12%, taking full advantage of newly available resources

Puddles removed from the surface of the moon, which most players were unable to see at all

Puddles added to vertical surfaces (such as the sides of buildings, vehicles, people, and vertical puddles)

Disabled all non-puddle post-processing effects

Last-minute changes to the texture work of Spider-Man's suit, replacing the spider logo with a puddle logo

In order to free up memory for more puddles we completely removed the dynamic weather system, particularly rain

Changed numerous signs and billboards to contain words that are more puddle-centric (like 'Pudds 'n 'Spuds, a puddle themed potato restaurant)

Gameplay

Removed several web-swinging animations to make room for additional puddles

Changed nearly every mission objective to "Puddle."

Tweaked the difficulty of Spider-Man's final boss fight, in which he faces off with The Puddler

If players rest on top of a skyscraper long enough Spider-Man will gaze out at the New York harbor and philosophically muse that "From up here, the ocean looks like one big puddle."

Reworked the puddle quick time events to be much more difficult

Adjusted the combat system to ensure that all combos end with the enemy either laying in a puddle or dying, uttering their last words "Tell my puddle I loved it."

When Spider-Man accomplishes certain tasks he is now rewarded with XP, or eXperience Puddles

Thanks to the advanced motion tracking technology in the PS4 DualShock, players can shake their controllers to create vaguely proportional ripples in puddles

Bugs

Fixed an issue in which the player would occasionally not step in a puddle

Tracked down a glitch that mistakenly allowed the camera to look up, away from all the puddles

Removed a particularly nasty bug that completely deactivated all physics and scripting when a puddle was on screen

In many cutscenes the characters were blocking the player's view of puddles, so we removed all characters from cutscenes

All save games were simply storing a repeating string of text that read "puddlepuddlepuddlepuddle"

In the mandatory Spider-Man Kart levels, banana power-ups were sinking and disappearing when dropped on top of puddles

Fixed an issue that prevented players from turning in their Puddle Coins for cosmetic skins to alter the appearance of puddles

Sound

Every time Spider-Man passes a puddle (this happens a lot) he now remarks, "This puddle is amazing."

Replaced all music with the hit song "She Hates Me" by Puddle of Mudd, and convinced the band to remove "of Mudd" from their name

 

[boobio]

 

[Baron Dupek]

Another pitiful attempts to be funny from these goons.
They can't beat Boiling Point - Roat to Hell patchnotes.
Wish I had full list...

 

[Viata]

edit: those ntsc versions kinda freak me out

I had both versions. We used to think the PAL version was a newer version of SNES just like those Playstation slim version.

There was a second ntsc version, I had both.

Perhaps this is the reason we thought it was a newer snes version. Someone mistook this one with the PAL version.

 

[Gerrard]

A single look at the building in the background, or the wall on the left, shows that it's clearly not "just a change in poodle size".

 

[Assisted Living Godzilla]

Fuck Kotaku is garbage. Anyone with working eyes can see it's a downgrade when looking at the two images side-by-side, no need to put it in quotes like it's some figment of people's imagination. It's not like it not looking as good begins and ends with puddles...which Insomniac implies in their tweet.

Garbage headline too: People Who Haven't Played Game Discuss Visual Aspect Of Game, Note It Doesn't Look As Good As Last Time They Didn't Play It. But with spin, gotta have spin in a fucking video game article.

The weirdest change is they changed Spider-Man's stance. The space between his arms, legs, and torso made him look thinner, more fit...like Spider-Man. Without any of that space, it makes him look boxier, makes him look fat, and with the flatter colors and texture changes he looks less like Spider-Man perched there and more like some tubby cosplayer dressing up as Spider-Man. Also seems weird since I thought the whole design idea of the giant white spider symbols on his back was to make Spider-Man pop more, but the change in the pose makes it less visible.

 

[Murk]

Kotaku, Who Are Not Gamers and Do Not Like Video Games, Shill Yet Again -- This Time, With Just As Much Shilling As Before.

 

[rusty_shackleford]

yikes
the amount of ""journalists"" in full damage control mode

 

[lightbane]

Consoletards falling for the same trick, AGAIN, n. 1311st.

 

[Grotesque]

I religiously watch the cutscenes.

the 90's are over.

 

[janior]

 

[Clockwork Knight]

Puddlegate.

edit: This is probably Watchdogs again. "There is no downgrade" because the good looking version is still there, just hidden at release so the console versions won't look like ass compared to PC.

 

[Unkillable Cat]

(Includes related gay pörn at the end)

 

[Assisted Living Godzilla]

Puddlegate.

edit: This is probably Watchdogs again. "There is no downgrade" because the good looking version is still there, just hidden at release so the console versions won't look like ass compared to PC.

It's a Sony game, there isn't going to be a PC version.

 

[Santander02]

Oh stalker was brought up.

 

[Assisted Living Godzilla]

 

[Zed Duke of Banville]

"Yet for the past two years you’ve been Canadian consultant to the UN Commission on Problems of the Visitation."
"Yes. But I have nothing to do with the study of extraterrestrial cultures. On the commission my colleagues and I represent the international scientific community when questions come up on implementing UN decisions regarding the internationalization of the Zones. Roughly speaking, we make sure that the extraterrestrial marvels found in the Zones come into the hands of the International Institute."
"Is there anyone else after these treasures?"
"Yes."
"You probably mean stalkers!"
"I don’t know what they are."
"That’s what we in Harmont call the thieves who risk their lives in the Zone to grab everything they can lay their hands on. It’s become a whole new profession."
"I understand. No, that’s not within our competence."
"I should think not. That’s police business. But I would be interested in knowing just what does fall within your competence, Dr. Pilman."
"There is a steady leak of materials from the Visitation Zones into the hands of irresponsible persons and organizations. We deal with the results of these leaks."

Spoiler

Roadside Picnic by the Strugatsky brothers

 

[lightbane]

 

[Mikeal]

 

[Owl]

Re: the Spiderman thing. After watching the Digital Foundry analysis videos (they show and explain very thoroughly what's changed since the E3 demo), this OMG DOWNGRADE hysteria seems to be blown out of proportion a bit...

 

[Average Manatee]

Re: the Spiderman thing. After watching the Digital Foundry analysis videos (they show and explain very thoroughly what's changed since the E3 demo), this OMG DOWNGRADE hysteria seems to be blown out of proportion a bit...

Much like Clinton in the white house, the issue is not what they dicked up but that they continue to brazenly lie about it and act insulted when people call out bullshit. Everyone knows the previews were not real. Everyone knows there's a downgrade. Everyone can see there's a downgrade. Devs continue to insist that the consumers are too stupid to understand that their changes are for purely artistic reasons that totally don't make the game look worse for the purpose of having the game play at more than 5 FPS on consoles.

 

[markec]

 

[PulsatingBrain]

Jesus Christ, that is some pathetic shit