D. Gaider - from writing games to writing novels

[hiver]

What the hell? hyperwerwolves?

 

[Fat Dragon]

John Stalvern waited. The lights above him blinked and sparked out of the air. There were demons in the base. He didn't see them, but had expected them now for years. His warnings to Cernel Joson were not listenend to and now it was too late. Far too late for now, anyway.
John was a space marine for fourteen years. When he was young he watched the spaceships and he said to dad "I want to be on the ships daddy."
Dad said "No! You will BE KILL BY DEMONS"
There was a time when he believed him. Then as he got oldered he stopped. But now in the space station base of the UAC he knew there were demons.
"This is Joson" the radio crackered. "You must fight the demons!"
So John gotted his palsma rifle and blew up the wall.
"HE GOING TO KILL US" said the demons
"I will shoot at him" said the cyberdemon and he fired the rocket missiles. John plasmaed at him and tried to blew him up. But then the ceiling fell and they were trapped and not able to kill.
"No! I must kill the demons" he shouted
The radio said "No, John. You are the demons"
And then John was a zombie.

lol wtf

 

[DefJam101]

John Freeman who was Gordon Freemans brother was one day in an office typing on a computer.

 

[elander_]

You can't criticize it unless you read the entire novel. :twisted:

 

[Jaime Lannister]

Does it get better when you get to the sword coast?

 

[Rhalle]

Let it be known that I also bash Bioware on occasion.

However, I submit for your perusal the following:

Cailan: Loghain, my decision is final. I will stand by the Grey Wardens in this assualt.
Loghain: You risk too much, Cailan. The Darkspawn horde is too dangerous for you to be playing hero on the frontlines.
Cailan: If that's the case, perhaps we should wait for the Orlesian forces to join us, after all.
Logahain: I must repeat my protest to your fool notion that we need the Orlesians to defend ourselves.
Cailan: It is not a fool notion. Our arguments with the Orlesians are a thing of the past. And you will remember who is King.
Loghain: How fortunate Marick did not live to see his son hand Ferelden over to those who enslaved us for a century!
Cailan: Then our current forces will have to suffice, won't they? Duncan, are your men ready for battle?
Duncan: They are, Your Majesty.
Cailan: And this is the recruit I met earlier on the road? I understand congratulations are in order. Every Grey Warden is needed now; you should be honored to join their ranks.
Loghain: Your fascination with glory and legends will be your undoing, Cailan. We must attend to reality.
Cailan: Fine, speak your strategy.
Lohain: <silence>
Cailan: The Grey Wardens and I will draw the Darkspawn into charging our lines. And then?
Loghain: You will alert the tower to light the beacon, signalling my men to charge from cover.
Cailan: To flank the Darkspawn. I remember. This is the tower of Ishaal in the ruins, yes? Well, who shall light this beacon?
Loghain: I have a few men stationed there. It's not a dangerous task, but it is vital.
Cailan: Then we should send our best. Send Alistair and the new Grey Warden to make sure it's done.
Loghain: You rely on these Grey Wardens too much. Is that truly wise?
Cailan: Enough of your conspiracy theories, Loghain. Grey Wardens battle the blight no matter where they're from.
Duncan: Your Majesty, you shold consider the possibility of the Archdemon appearing.
Loghain: There have been no signs of any dragons in the wilds.
Cailan: Isn't that what your men are here for, Duncan?
Duncan: I... Yes, Your Majesty.
Mage: Your Majesty, the tower and its beacon are unnecessary. The Circle of Magi--
Preistess: We will not trust any lives to your spells, mage. Save them for the Darkspawn.
Loghain: Enough. This plan will suffice. The Grey Wardens will light the beacon.
Cailan: Thank you, Loghain. I cannot wait for that glorious moment: The Grey Wardens battle beside the King of Ferelden to stem the tide of evil!
Loghain: Yes, Cailan. A glorious moment for us all.

I am assuming, of course, that this is Gaider's work, and not one of the ladies'.

 

[rpgcodexusername]

You're no fun anymore

 

[Jaime Lannister]

Sounds like a cheap LotR ripoff complete with beacons, <s>orcs</s> darkspawn, and <s>rangers</s> wardens.

 

[The Feral Kid]

The Conan books are much much better than the films. Though the film version are not *that* bad.

Only thing you can accuse CtB for is not being exactly faithful to the books and imo this is something good.

Milius attempted to give a concrete historical look to the film making it very much a historical film with fantasy elements and not the other way around. He also injected to the film deep philosophical and typically Nietzschean themes (for those who are able to see beyond its obvious action-orientated premise) that were completely absent form the R.E. Howard stories. So yeah as a direct adaptation CtB fails, but the movie is much more than that. So instead of "dumbing-down" which is the current trend in movies, Milius went the other way and made a movie that is richer in its parts than its one-dimensional source material. (I think it says a lot that CtB director John Milius was the screenwriter of Apocalypse Now)

Same could be said about the recent adaptation of Beowulf, as screenwriters Gaiman and Avary drew from a middle-ages epic poem material to turn it into a study about the human condition, thus modernizing it and making it matter for today's standards.

 

[Ausir]

Same could be said about the recent adaptation of Beowulf, as screenwriters Gaiman and Avary drew from a middle-ages epic poem material to turn it into a study about the human condition, thus modernizing it and making it matter for today's standards.

Too bad Zemeckis told them to cut much of the dialogue and make it more actiony.

 

[Rhalle]

Sounds like a cheap LotR ripoff complete with beacons, <s>orcs</s> darkspawn, and <s>rangers</s> wardens.

It's pretty clear that the first LOTR film had an influence on DA; it came out at about the time of the game's inception. To me the dialogue sounds like a very passable imitation of a Shakespearean history play.

I'm looking forward to DA, but I do wonder if the DLC is going to be a deal-breaker. My suspicion is that it will be very ugly, the price paid to EA for having to publish a PC game.

And whoever said the ending includes riding on the back of a dragon, replace that with "griffon" and I think it might be reasonably safe bet-- safer than the stock market anyway.

 

[kris]

Rowan, the beautiful warrior maiden promised to him since birth.

Ah.

Ahahaa.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

You couldn't make that stuff up. That's like the lowest of the low of fantasy writing.

this would be a fun take if she hated his guts throughout the entire book and she couldn't fight. That's the way I would have written it.

Gaider could always give her the personality of Aerie or something. That way none will fall in love with her. Or...

 

[VonVentrue]

All my hopes of DA delivering on the expectations went right down the drain all of a sudden...

 

[Pastel]

The thread on the Bioware boards is pretty fun.
"Where do we get snippets or updates on the book? A chapter or so to tide us over the agonizing wait? Character profiles of people from the book? A picture of Rowan for the boys?"

 

[Gragt]

The thread on the Bioware boards is pretty fun.
"Where do we get snippets or updates on the book? A chapter or so to tide us over the agonizing wait? Character profiles of people from the book? A picture of Rowan for the boys?"

I guess people on the Bioware boards are goth poets after all.

 

[The Rambling Sage]

A picture of Rowan for the boys?

:facepalm:

 

[Gromnir]

I could imagine a great writer actually making a good novel out of this basic concept.

That would have to be a pretty epic writer.

I mean, taking traditional fantasy cliches and turning them on their head is great and all. But from that description, that doesn't really sound like what they're doing

Maybe I should do a book review for GB...

Gaider's work is a book based 'pon a fantasy game, which itself is gonna have as broad a market appeal as bioware can manage. if bio has an MO, it is Broad Appeal. there will be happy endings and many basic fantasy archetypes and cliches will be embraced, 'cause that is what appeals to the Average Gamer. don't expect too much deviation from fantasy norms from Gaider or from Dragon Age, 'cause bio is not gonna get cute or courageous with millions of dollars in development money on the line. is Dragon Age the novel that Gaider would pen if he were not making an adaptation/prequel/whatever o' a big budget game? doubt it, but we do not know.

that being said, you can looks at basic plot of ANY fantasy novel written in the past 50 years, and find ways to slam. is fantasy after all. divorce self from the typical slavish devotion to tolkien that exists and reflect 'pon the plot wherein a bunch o' dumpy little fairies manage to save the world from the Ultimate Evil. rrrriiiiggghhhttt. Harold Bloom, and most scholars outside of Oxford, were very harsh critics of TLotR. Robert E. Howard only wrote a single Conan novel. read the dust jacket if you get the chance. *groan* from Fritz Leiber to George R.R. Martin, the basic plot stuff of fantasy has been rehashed ad nuaseum.

say what you will 'bout Harold Bloom, but he is correct that plot-focused fiction were supplanted by a new dedication to character development at turn of the 20th century. other than Guy Gavriel Kay, Gromnir cannot thinks of another writer o' fantasy who has largely eschewed character in favor o' plot post-TLotr. especially in fantasy, wherein all plots is required to be a little ridiculous, the plot stuff is understandably subject to ridicule, and so writers has focused 'pon what readers genuinely seem to care 'bout: character and character relations.

*shrug*

assume the the plot o' DA will be silly, but so what? all the fantasy plots is arguably stoopid and silly.

can Gaider makes characters that is compelling and evocative? dunno. a novel is a different animal than is crpgs. if somebody sends Gromnir a copy of Gaider's book we may even read it to find out if he successful makes leap from games to books. will this be Gaider's magnum opus... or perhaps simply the first in a line o' magnum opera? mayhap it will suck so terrible that for the next decade nobody at e3 will voluntarily make eye contact with Gaider.

is possible/probable that Gromnir will write a review... without the Grom-speak shtick. am thinking that Gaider deserves an honest review.

HA! Good Fun!

 

[Pastel]

Fuck off and die of AIDS.

 

[Jaesun]

Fuck off and die of AIDS.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyX9zdcU ... re=related

 

[meeneque]

Fuck off and die of AIDS.

... and then die again.

 

[Fat Dragon]

Gromnir is a pretty awesome poster.

 

[Shannow]

Gromnir are a pretty tl;dr poster.

fixed

 

[Twinfalls]

Robert E. Howard only wrote a single Conan novel.

And a fuck-ton of Conan shorts and novellas. What's your point there?

Howard is a good example, actually. Stories written as pulp fodder for cheap magazines, yet stunningly well written and bona fide works of art. Sorry Gromnir, all the evidence points to Gaider being a supremely shitty writer. That character summary goes well beyond merely stereotypical, it is as close to insurmountable shittiness as I've ever seen.

He may surprise us, but chances are the novel is going to provide a great deal of entertainment for the codex when it gets released....

 

[Drakron]

Robert E. Howard only wrote a single Conan novel.

He also killed himself when he was 30 years old.

And as pointed out by Twinfalls, he certainly did not just wrote a single novel.

 

[Gromnir]

Robert E. Howard only wrote a single Conan novel.

Howard is a good example, actually. Stories written as pulp fodder for cheap magazines, yet stunningly well written and bona fide works of art.

yeah, so what is your point? OUR point is indeed that Howard were a fantastic author, but you look at a synopsis o' plot o' his novel (or any one o' his short stories) and you can make a good case that they sound silly or stoopid or cliche. fight the necromancer to save the kingdom and the princes? *snort* is not just one time Howard did that schtick, eh?

"he certainly did not just wrote a single novel"

actually, yeah, he wrote only a single novel. write novels is a different task than is short stories... but that ain't really the point, now was it? yeah, there is a boatload o' material by Howard, but only a single novel... is an easy point o' reference, and the plot o' that novel not sound any better when read off of the dust jacket than does Gaider's work.

you kids up to speed now?

HA! Good Fun!