Dragon Age Dragon Age: The Veilguard Pre-Release Thread [GAME RELEASED, GO TO NEW THREAD]

[Peachcurl]

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

And I cannot lie.

 

[S.H.O.D.A.N.]

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

This would be a decent setup to a Monty Python sketch, with Cleese laboriously explaining to Jones that sex is, in fact, very much not like sailing.

 

[Infinitron]

https://www.videogameschronicle.com/news/ea-plans-to-release-two-unannounced-games-this-fiscal-year/

EA plans to release two unannounced games this fiscal year​

ONE IS A PARTNER TITLE AND THE OTHER IS BASED ON AN OWNED IP

Electronic Arts has confirmed plans to release two unannounced titles during its current fiscal year ending on March 31, 2025.

The company published an updated product release slate, which is viewable below, as part of its quarterly earnings report on Tuesday.

The partner game, which will likely be published through its EA Originals label, will be released in the first quarter of calendar 2025. A quarterly launch window for the game based on the company’s owned IP wasn’t confirmed.

According to Giant Bomb reporter Jeff Grubb, the mystery EA title is BioWare‘s Dragon Age: Dreadwolf, which the publisher plans to fully reveal this summer.

 

[Vulpes]

Which progressive current day obsession will get a quest entirely devoted to lecturing the player on it?

This shit has been in development for so long that I'm expecting to see references to the 2016 US election. "Make Tevinter Great Again" will be the slogan of the new enemy faction

 

[Child of Malkav]

This shit has been in development for so long that I'm expecting to see references to the 2016 US election. "Make Tevinter Great Again" will be the slogan of the new enemy faction

They'll build a wall and make the humans pay for it because the elves are bad hombres and they enter illegally and make the crime stats go up. Even though they represent 13% of the tevinter population they are responsible for over 50% of the knife and blood magic related crimes.

 

[MerchantKing]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

 

[La vie sexuelle]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

 

[MerchantKing]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

 

[La vie sexuelle]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

 

[BosanskiSeljak]

I need to unwatch this thread because I did 135 hours of this game before I matured enough to drop shit I hated because I had a compulsive need to finish any game I started to a reasonable level of 100% completion despite the pain. It is close to a PTSD trigger. A feat I only achieved playing Witcher 3 shortly after. I still haven't seen a convincing argument for one good aspect of this game. I can think of one good sequence of events that was immedately shattered within the same mission. Inb4 graphics (i.e. another bland fantasy world with vibrant colours. Kill yourself). I'll donate a game of choice to anyone who can write a well articulated, not objectively wrong argument for one aspect of DA:I that is consistently well done throughout the entire game.

 

[The Jester]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

^
t. pays crackwhores for sex

 

[fantadomat]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

Hmm it seems that you are a cunt....now the question is if you are a prostitute too. The vomit thing gives it away.

 

[Hammer Of The Heretics]

I'll donate a game of choice to anyone who can write a well articulated, not objectively wrong argument for one aspect of DA:I that is consistently well done throughout the entire game.

As I recall, the "exit game" option was consistently effective. Not once did I have any difficulty not playing the game.

 

[MerchantKing]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

You're not eating the box right? It's extremely unhygienic.

Eat the box, get the pox.

The only thing I can think of that someone might vomit from is what that Kelly Balthazar did. Incredibly embarrassing to her family. It's extremely gay and denigrating, even for women.

 

[La vie sexuelle]

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

Hmm it seems that you are a cunt....now the question is if you are a prostitute too. The vomit thing gives it away.

First and foremost, I am an esthete who appreciates good craftsmanship.

Not that the Bulgarian could appreciate it.

DA2 was great…. Hissy fag Anders, awesome button, David Gaydurr, Hamburger Hepler, noms-her-head…. lots of lols

There is always a catch, life is a catch, I suggest you catch it while you can, A+ writing right there.

Anyone remember that video Duncan saying to submit to the taint while teabagging the camera? Got deleted but I laughed my ass off to it back then.

"Sailing is like sex, if you do it right it's the best thing in the world. If you do it wrong, it will make you throw up."

“I like big boats.”

I don't like boats very much. The last time I was on one, I was vomiting for hours.

Just like after bad sex.

Maybe don't have sex with women who don't shower?

You must be a virgin if you think it's just about hygiene.

You're not eating the box right? It's extremely unhygienic.

Eat the box, get the pox.

The only thing I can think of that someone might vomit from is what that Kelly Balthazar did. Incredibly embarrassing to her family. It's extremely gay and denigrating, even for women.

I never get pox after the box.

 

[Semiurge]

La vie is a cunnoisseur.

 

[Ryzer]

https://www.videogameschronicle.com/news/ea-plans-to-release-two-unannounced-games-this-fiscal-year/

EA plans to release two unannounced games this fiscal year​

ONE IS A PARTNER TITLE AND THE OTHER IS BASED ON AN OWNED IP

Electronic Arts has confirmed plans to release two unannounced titles during its current fiscal year ending on March 31, 2025.

The company published an updated product release slate, which is viewable below, as part of its quarterly earnings report on Tuesday.

The partner game, which will likely be published through its EA Originals label, will be released in the first quarter of calendar 2025. A quarterly launch window for the game based on the company’s owned IP wasn’t confirmed.

According to Giant Bomb reporter Jeff Grubb, the mystery EA title is BioWare‘s Dragon Age: Dreadwolf, which the publisher plans to fully reveal this summer.

FC 25 and Apex Legends 2.

 

[9ted6]

Which progressive current day obsession will get a quest entirely devoted to lecturing the player on it?

I'd bet money on there being a Drumpf expy in Tevinter.

If the Maker is revealed it'll be one, some or all of the following: black, female, trans, gay. People wrongly assuming the Maker to be male, white or straight will be mentioned.

 

[mediocrepoet]

Which progressive current day obsession will get a quest entirely devoted to lecturing the player on it?

I'd bet money on there being a Drumpf expy in Tevinter.

If the Maker is revealed it'll be one, some or all of the following: black, female, trans, gay. People wrongly assuming the Maker to be male, white or straight will be mentioned.

I'm so tired of all the blagft-ness being shoved at me. How about a Eurasian straight male who gets all the chicks and doesn't take no shit?

 

[A-Minish]

The Maker in question

But more seriously, with their current talents they probably should just leave the Maker where it is. It is already hard to write a compeling story, so writting a divinity of this type will probably be a flaming disaster.

 

[processdaemon]

I like the ambiguity around the Maker's existence and hope they resist the temptation to try and answer it too, although since I think they're setting up Andraste as an Old God Baby to explain her power I suspect they're going to abandon or sideline the Maker altogether.

 

[BosanskiSeljak]

I like the ambiguity around the Maker's existence and hope they resist the temptation to try and answer it too, although since I think they're setting up Andraste as an Old God Baby to explain her power I suspect they're going to abandon or sideline the Maker altogether.

The ambiguity of the Maker's existence was destroyed by DA:I making Elves the masterrace

 

[processdaemon]

The events of DA:I and Trespasser don't preclude the existence of the Maker. They poke holes in a lot of aspects of the Chantry's story, most importantly that the Maker created the veil), but unless I'm misremembering (which I could be as it's been a while since I played) if anything the events of Trespasser disprove the Elven creation myths more than the Maker since Solas' recollections are proof that the Evanuris were very powerful mages who distinguished themselves in war and not true Gods*. If Andraste were confirmed as an OGB would bother me more than the revelations in Trespasser because explaining away the strongest evidence for Divine intervention post-creation doesn't just make the existence of the Maker less likely, it makes it irrelevant; a creator who has never shown any interest in interacting with his creation might as well be the Big Bang for all the relevance he has.

*I guess it's possible that the Sun-father that Elger'nan threw down is the Maker and the sun being forced to set is symbolic of the Maker being forced to abandon his creation, making both partially true, but I hope it's not because that opens the possibility of DA5 (should it exist) being us fighting the Maker if he comes back after we or Solas inevitably kill Elger'nan in Dreadwolf and that would be an absolutely awful direction for the franchise to go in.

 

[The Wall]

Anyone who still seriously discusses Dragon Age and accepts Inqusition as cannon should be anally raped by Dragon. This thread should be nothing more but for occasional chuckle at retardation of present day pink haired Biowhore who stopped making Dragon Age and Mass Effect back in ~2012.

Do you now SEE why companies spend millions on nostalgia franchise rights? Because we spend billions buying them. FUCK yours and mine nostalgia

 

[The Wall]

How many Indie full blood, based RPG titles in time frame: 2017-2024 got announced, had Kickstarter, entered Early Access, got released, received expansion and CAN'T boast 217 PAGES???

What are we doing with our TIME wasting it on goyslop like this?!?