Let's Rip Off Something Awful - Dark Omen or No Love For 56K

[Jasede]

If you had helped the elves and aquired the archers it'd be a walk in the park...*whistle* Nothing to see here. Move along.[/size]

I refer you to the result above. It's not too shabby. *whistle*

 

[Jasede]

...I just had the BEST run ever of the next mission. No losses, 4000 gp, magic item, tons of XP... and now I realized FRAPS, though active, wasn't making screenshots

;.;

Edit: You know what, I'll just explain the next mission using MS Paint and be done with it. >.<

 

[thras]

MS Paint would be just fine -- it might work better than actual screenshots.

 

[Elwro]

Hey, that would be a nice diversion, I agree!

 

[Jasede]

Thank god. I have no intention of doing the next mission again normally. I was doing it in a very "Let's break the game + AI" way that results in minimal (1) losses and great XP and I really don't want to go through that again.

 

[Brother None]

Thank god. I have no intention of doing the next mission again normally.

You seem to have no intention to do anything.

 

[Jasede]

...dude, I have a life. I said some looong time ago I'd try to update once a week. Give me a break here, please. :/

 

[Shannow]

...dude, I have a life. I said some looong time ago I'd try to update once a week. Give me a break here, please. :/

Need a break?

 

[Jasede]

I'd kill for bags full of that. Especially since my body seems to be 100% incapable of gaining weight at all.

 

[Ahzaruuk]

I'd kill for bags full of that. Especially since my body seems to be 100% incapable of gaining weight at all.

You too? I eat like a horse and I can only grow TALLER

...but I would sacrifice a virgin for that much chocolate. The chocolate...it CALLS MEH!

 

[Shannow]

I'd kill for bags full of that. Especially since my body seems to be 100% incapable of gaining weight at all.

Was the same for me when I was ten. Now I just eat 2-3 chocolate bars from Aldi a week and I gain a kilo...

And now bringen Sie back ze germaan accents

 

[Jasede]

Fine, I'll start working on an update today/tomorrow. Once that's done, the next updates should be done soon. I mean, after the MS Paint thing, we have a whole of TWO missions left.

TWO.

 

[caliban]

...but I would sacrifice a virgin for that much chocolate.

Well then, go ahead and kill yourself, we won't mind. ;]

 

[Jasede]

Chapter 17 - Pistol Shot Paint Danmaku Happy Fun Times


This is a sloppy update, only here to get things done. That said, the battle is so hopelessly boring that you're better off skipping this post. Go on, skip it. You won't miss a thing.

Still here? Dumbass. Seriously, I told you! Fine.

Last update we helped some dudes. Yeah, you'll remember, that heinously difficult orc attack mission. That was the last mission that is optional; we're now on a straight path to hell. If you'll recall, some pistoliers joined us, wanting gold and glory. More gold than glory, though.

Well, suffice to say, they're pretty pissed off when they find out that we're actually on a crusade for the emperor, killing undead who tend not to carry many valuables around! Meh. Normally I'd give some dialogue here, but it's nothing you haven't heard before. Resuming our way towards Moussillon we get the usual "Oh gawd, an ambush!" speech, complete with Morgan going "Shatter their bones!" etc. We've seen this a dozen times before. In fact, have we ever managed to ride anywhere WITHOUT an ambush? I really don't know anymore.

Battle 24 - And Now for Something Completely Different

Behold my superior artistic talent.

Five fucking skeleton archers (->), five LARGE units of skeleton infantry (I) and THREE skullscreamer catapults, as well as a necromancer. This requires drastic measures... which is why I deploy Grudgebringers, the Ice Wizard and our new Pistoliers, and only them.

After giving them the Shield of Ptolos and casting the Ice Missile Shield spell on the mounted, fast pistoliers, we move them right into the middle of all archers. They're almost invulnerable to arrows now, after all. I am not worried about the catapult. Being mounted, I can just ride them away if I see that a shell is about to hit them.

Pistoliers kick ass. They kill about four skeletons each salvo. That's pretty amazing. The enemy archers attack, but their arrows bounce off harmlessly.

Predictably, they're soon all really dead! We refresh the Shield spell, charge up the hill, unharmed by the catapult (it misses too often) and by the arrows (double magic missile shields!). Every undead on the hill soon falls to our pistoliers, who have had "Dispel Magic" cast on them because the necromancer likes to teleport around and zap them every once in a while.

We bring our troops in a new formation, spotting the undead infantry that hid behind the trees. Since they target our pistoliers, which are faster than them, we can just move them away and destroy them with tornado spells from the trusty ice mage.

We deal with the necromancer. While he tries to hurt our pistoliers fruitlessly, thanks to Dispel Magic, both the pistols as well as the frost magic causes him great anguish; he eventually succumbs to the pain and perishes. Note that we're still out of range of the skullscreamer catapults (red circle).

You have to know something: those four infantry skeleton units, ~100 skeletons together? They're been set by the AI to defend the catapults. For us, this means they won't do a SINGLE DAMN THING as long as we stay far enough away, unless we destroy the catapults. They won't even react when hit by the long-range tornado spell of the wizard! Do we abuse this shamelessly? Absolutely!

Dumb AI doesn't even notice we freeze 25% of its army, as well as the two catapults. That's right, the AI does not do a single thing while we sit there, far away, aiming our ice mage's tornados at the catapults. That black circle is a tower I forgot to draw earlier.

Only after the catapults are destroyed the undead finally react. We react too, zipping the pistoliers into position... why? You'll see.

Here's why! The pistoliers are about twice as fast, if not faster, than the skeletons. So what we do now is make all three surviving skeleton units follow the pistoliers they'll never catch, occasionally stopping and firing at the bone-men until every single one is dead.

Yes. That's it. That's the whole mission. I told you to skip this post!
Anyway, mission report: 3400 gold, 1 dead ally (1 pistolier), 1000 XP for the ice wizard, 2000 XP for the pistoliers, giving them level 1 and bringing them 50% to level 2. Also, magic item found in that black tower, if you destroy it with 30 fireballs (Grudgebringer sword). Alternatively you can try making it get hit by the catapults. What item? That's a surprise for next update. Cheers.

Also, yeah, this WAS the third-last mission in the game. If you thought it was too easy, trust me, the next final two make up for it... *shudder*

 

[Surgey]

I have no idea what's going on, but I'm sure it's awesome. Keep on trucking, finish this!

 

[Jasede]

^ Motivation
| \
|  \
|   \
|    \
|     \
*------> Progress of LP

 

[Brother None]

Man, that was beautiful. Most awesomest battle yet.

Also, "LP"?

 

[Jasede]

Let's Play.

Two more missions left... they're hard. I'll see about them this weekend. It'll take many tries. We face numbers that exceed ours by the factor five, and they're all level 3.

 

[Shannow]

Let's Play.

Two more missions left... they're hard. I'll see about them this weekend. It'll take many tries. We face numbers that exceed ours by the factor five, and they're all level 3.

You're obviously not up for the task, so let's just call it quits. Was a nice thread as long as your motivation lasted, thanks.

 

[Jasede]

Ok. It was fun while it lasted. I'll do Wizardry 6 next.

 

[Top Hat]

You know you should really be comparing the lengths of the velocities rather than the velocities themselves if you are going to use >> or <<. What you said is wrong.

...?

Did I just write that?

Yeah. I don't know what's wrong with me either.

If you don't want to finish, maybe you could send someone who is interested in finishing it the save games (if that's possible)?

 

[Jasede]

I was kidding. I hope Shannow was too or he can fuck right off. I haven't actually tried the next battle yet, nor do I know how the last one looks like. This is all new territory folks. I'd record a video if I didn;t sound like a total faggot with a painfully German accent who sounds just like the guys in the cutscenes, except without balls.

In retrospect I wonder why everyone said this game was terribly hard. No mission was hard enough that it wasn't solvable in, at most, five tries. I think all the difficulty people may have with this game comes from spreading experience points too thin. But we'll see how I fare in the final confrontations.

This game has nothing on SotHR though, which just crushes you mercilessly by mission 5 or 6 (save the Carlssons). And then it just gets harder. UNLESS you abuse the fuck out of your amber wizard.

 

[sqeecoo]

Wow, why dont you do SOTHR next? These last few missions are ridiculous! They have much, much, much more troops, and you usually have to attack! It's insane!

But you are doing wonderfully, although you are abusing everything you can: nothing illegitimate mind you, but you are pushing your advantages as much as you can, and not playing "realistical" battles. Which is fine or even perhaps necessary; the game certainly encourages it.

Anyway, good job!

 

[thras]

That was the first battle where I underestood what was going on the entire time.

 

[Claw]

In retrospect I wonder why everyone said this game was terribly hard. No mission was hard enough that it wasn't solvable in, at most, five tries. I think all the difficulty people may have with this game comes from spreading experience points too thin.

Maybe most people don't know the trick of using few regiments to maximize their control. For instance, take the battle where you defend Bogenhafen.
I deployed my cannon and the allied troops as guards/cannonfodder and subsequently preventing the undead from massacring the cew became a real problem for me.
I also had a hard time managing all my units in general.


PS: Mill on hill. Comedy gold.