So, as I asked: where the fuck am I?
Here, basically.
And why have we come here?
This is the shortest route to Durlag's Tower. It's just north of here.
Right.
Level up is finally in visibility range.
Another chapter reset of stats. Over 71000 XP gained from kills so far (out of total 85700).
Since The Codex is out of spells after the mines, we start with resting.
We only manage to make a few steps before encountering some gnolls.
And there I thought there would be some incline in enemy quality after Nashkel Mines.
Aren't gnolls better than kobolds?
Barely.
Your eyelids become veeeery heeeeaaaavy.
OOH! Right in the crotch!
Ouch.
Now that we have cure light wounds we don't need to be that cautious with avoiding being hurt. This should speed up the gameplay a bit.
Skeletons!
It's like High Hedge all over again.
Hey, aren't you guys missing a skull?
Skull trap works a little differently from fireball, but effects can be similar.
They were guarding an entrance of some kind.
We might as well check what's inside right now.
Three ghasts. I'm fucked.
Not necessarily. Remember that wand we found in the mines?
Wand of Awesomeness? Yeah!
BURN! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Each ghast gets two 3d6 lightning bolts to the face, which probably won't kill any of them, but should considerably soften them up.
The bolts seem to be returning this way...
OW! FUCK!
Look at the bright side. Ghasts are dead. And you should be ok with the boots of grounding...
...or not. Whoops.
Death count: 51
Reloading.
That was so stupid, I won't even call you out for it, since I somehow agreed to do it anyway. Any other ideas, maybe?
Actually, I have the same idea, but improved.
This potion should take care of friendly
fire lightning.
Ok. Makes sense.
IT'S ALIVE!
Well not really, but I get what You mean.
I only wish this wand had more charges. Oh well, we'll find another one eventually.
There are three... I don't know... Coffins? Sarcophaguses?
Sarcophagi, I think.
Whatever. Let's just loot them.
Some nice loot.
And more nice loot.
Our first wand of monster summoning. We'll need probably at least two of these if we want to kill Drizzt. One might be enough too, with some luck.
Magic arrows. These never hurt to have.
Unless you have them pierced through your head, of course.
We continue our journey.
Gibberlings!
Yeah, right... Wait. Those actually are gibberlings!
Yup!
Vengeance time!
Come on monkeys! The sword has something to tell you!
After this pitiful incident, we move on.
Well, hello there ladies!
Watch out, they're hostile.
I'm sure it's a misunderstanding.
OW! What the fuck!? That hurts!
Yeah, I bet it does.
Death count: 52
Reloading.
What was that? No dialogue? They just started shooting!
Women. I know.
I'll approach them a little bit more carefully then.
HEY! I heard
Desperate Housewives will be canceled after current season!
It seems two of them don't watch television.
Tele-what?
Yeah, yeah, you want to kill me for some reason I don't care. You're welcome to try!
Let's see if you can cast spells with Magic Missiles hitting you!
You do realize You will only be able to disrupt one of them?
Uh... Wand of Lightning!
Ha! How do you like THAT?
That one is still casting and your Horror has worn off...
Dammit! I must-
You must what? Oh. Hold person.
Death count: 53
Reloading.
I think it will be best to deal with them one at a time.
Yes.
Hey! I heard Robert Pattison won't do Twilight movies anymore!
Easy prey.
Another vampire-lover coming right up.
Ow! Fucking rabid fangirls!
The cow cure will save me!
No more of them are running at me in blind rage. Let's scout the situation.
She seems unaffected by the spell.
Must be Jacob's fan.
Uh... Jacob... So handsome.
Are you alright? I swear I heard you say... oh.
Damn.
Death count: 54
Load game.
Let's quickly forget that situation, ok?
You'll never believe what your last words were...
You're right. I won't.
Luckily, we saved after killing the first two amazons, or whoever they are.
We try another approach.
Backstab, bitch!
Only 22 damage. What do You you want to do now?
Just watch. Hey there, Lamalha, right? Your eyes look like sapphires in the moonlight, and stuff.
See? I rule!
I'm impressed.
I'll let
you try a bit of hold person! See how it feels!?
NOT VERY PLEASANT, IS IT!?
We make Lamalha use up her spells before charm wears off.
She loses consciousness after casting Command on herself. It's her second-to-last spell. Unfortunately she regains senses in time to cast the last one...
Death count: 55
Reloading.
What the fuck happenned?
She cast some kind of ward spell. Not sure.
Ok. Can we kill those bitches properly this time? I'm sick and tired of dying here!
Yeah, it's getting old. Prepare for backstabbing.
Well, fuck.
Great job there. I already see our impending victory.
Enough subtleties! Wand of lightning!
See!? Now you can be all sparkly too, bitches!
If my wand isn't enough for you, I have some magic in my hands, too!
Too much for you to handle!? THOUGHT SO!
All four girls drop some reasonable loot, including our first plate armor.
A little bit late for that, but I can always sell it.
Something that might prove useful during the endgame.
A wannabe-potion-of-protection.
And an almost-potion-of-heroism.
Also, a portable fireball.
Another one of plot dreams happens while resting.
Why do I dream of Mulahey if I also fought four presumably hot chicks recently?
Between this and Your Jacob comment from earlier...
Shut up. Now.
The Codex gains another Cure Light Wounds ability.
Another tomb to explore.
And I don't have any more potions of absorption.
No such thing needed here. Only a ghoul and a coffin with some gold inside.
You just can't let it go for the poor dogs, can You?
Not my fault they attack me on sight.
I'll tell you what. If I manage to put to sleep all remaining dogs, I will move on without killing them.
No such luck, it seems.
Who's that guy?
Yeah, yeah, give me the dagger, and quick. These dogs are biting my balls off!
Dogs manage to wound The Codex a little, before being defeated.
My poor testicles. You're safe now.
The dagger we got. Not bad, but it won't replace the +2 short sword.
What exactly was that guy talking about? Returning the dagger to someone?
Not sure, wasn't listening.
Fuck it, then. Look, another tomb!
I'm not sure I've met this type of enemy before.
Revenant? That rings a bell...
Fuck you! The dagger is mine! I almost lost my manhood getting it!
Feeling lucky, pal?
Ooooookay.
Death count: 56
Loading game.
Ok, seriously. What the fuck?
The zombie guy must have been lucky with to-hit rolls, or something.
Uh-huh. Somehow, I doubt that. But let's try again.
But I'll heal myself first this time...
Ow! Dammit!
Another lucky roll...?
FUCK!
Guess not.
Death count: 57
Reloading.
Anything to say?
Well, before You died, I managed to notice that he's immune to your non-magical sword.
Did you? That's nice. WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU REMEMBER THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE!?
Oh, I did, I just wasn't sure.
I will fucking kill you someday.
Blur should help me stay out of harm's way.
You still won't be able to hurt him.
I've got that one covered too.
Hadou... Magic Missile!
That might not be eno... Oh, You died already.
Death count: 58
Load game.
This guy is
tough.
Let's artificially increase your toughness too, then.
The Codex drinks potion of power and potion of stone form, and casts blur.
This gives him AC of -6. We'll see if this is enough.
It better be!
SHIT! The fuck!?
Yeah, not much has changed - the outcome is similar too (no death screenshot, sorry).
Death count: 59
Load game.
Ok, I'm out of ideas.
I might have one.
Let's see if undead can be backstabbed!
I don't know...
Treat this as a science experiment.
Geezfuck, it better works...
It actually did, although the damage is far from impressive.
Fuck, fuck, fuuuuck!
And so, an epic chase around the tomb begins, with The Codex employing all his magical arsenal against the revenant.
Die, fucking abomination!
Magic Missile...
I said: DIE!
Another Magic Missile...
I'LL KILL YOU NO MATTER WHAT!
A suicidal attack using Skull Trap...
Whew. Let's rest a bit to catch a breath.
You just... left the tomb?
Yeah. Something wrong with that?
No. That's... kind of brilliant. You can now hide and backstab him again.
Good idea!
HERE I AM, CORPSE-BOY!
He's down. Good job!
Killing the revenant gains The Codex a level.
Hell YES!
Our loot is invisibility potion.
The Codex levels up as a fighter. Sadly, it's the last ability gain in this class.
Second point in two handed weapon style doesn't give as much as the first one, but every little bit helps.
Revenant was the strongest enemy we've killed so far.
I'd say!
We get attacked by some dogs when trying to rest.
And I don't want to hear a word about 'them poor dawgs'. They'd have ripped me to shreds in my sleep.
I'm sure You'd have awakened when they had bitten Your hand off, or something.
We have a clever idea to rest inside the tomb. Nothing hostile is attracted this time.
I should be carrying a portable tomb with me.
We move on and soon run into this guy.
Yes.
Fascinating.
We've already done that joke before.
Oh, right.
He's a madman after all. Who would have guessed?
Not me. Completely surprised here.
We employ uberwand once again and shoot both Narcillicus and his jellies with two lightnings each. We manage to wound him, but he turns invisible. Jellies are magic resistant.
This doesn't bode well.
Indeed, it doesn't.
Death count: 60
Reloading.
It seems they can't be defeated just like that. We'll have to use some kind of tactics.
Let's approach them from the other side, so we only get in mage's sight range, not the jellies'.
'kay
It's a partial success - one of the jellies is in range too.
Magic Missile!
Narcillicus turns invisible once again, and the second jelly appears too.
I think I'm fucked.
The Codex' skull trap is interrupted by Narcillicus' lightning bolt. If not for the boots of grounding, we would be at load/logout screen now.
Having the boots delays that by a few seconds...
Death count: 61
Loading game.
That goo these jellies shot at me was a very unpleasant experience for my skin. I definitely should fight them one at a time.
Let's try approaching from northeast.
And fuck him over with the wand immediately.
It's a much more successful tactics, as everyone can no doubt see. All six 3d6 lightning bolts hit Narcillicus (each dealing very low damage for some reason, despite no 'save vs wands' message anywhere) and he dies.
LIKE THE LIGHTNING UP CLOSE!? YEAH, ME NEITHER!
Jellies are probably immune to magic, but we try casting skull trap anyway, in case they can fail resistance roll.
It doesn't work.
I'll have to deal with them the traditional way. Ready, bow?
Weapon ineffective? WTF?
Yeah, they are immune to non-magical weapons too. Killing them won't be tedious
at all.
The Codex begins spiking the jelly with magic arrows, each hit dealing 2 damage (3 on a critical, yay), while retreating further and further to stay out of its poisonous and slowing, but luckily short ranged projectile attack.
Fire arrows also work, but they only deal 2 points damage from regular 'magic arrow strike'. Mustard jellies are immune to additional 1d6 fire damage...
Of course.
Dogs. Just fucking great.
As usual, long-term retreating comes with some kind of surprise.
Down, boys!
Since there is no time to kill them, with the jelly following us relentlessly, the last charge of wand of lightning is used.
Farewell, you will be remembered.
One dog survives and has to be cut down.
Bad dog!
Soon after, jelly is finally killed.
YES! FUCK! YOU!
Maybe I can save some arrows if I backstab this thing first.
It doesn't really have a 'back' to 'stab'.
It might still work!
But it doesn't.
Fuck this shit!
Another episode of 'Run From The Jelly And Shoot Back' begins.
Sounds more interesting that most of reality shows nowadays.
We spare a moment during the chase to pick up stuff from Narcillicus' corpse.
Lightning! Hell yes!
After a
long time, jelly kicks the bucket.
Can you really say that? It had no legs...
Whatever.
We are almost done here - we meet some gnolls while finishing up the exploration.
But their careers soon end, along with their lives.
Well said.
Area completed!
But it's not all yet. We still have some content for You, noble codexer readers, as we head to Nashkel to sell some stuff.
Dagger +2 which we fought so hard for...
Twice! Don't forget the dogs!
Right. Well, the dagger nets us pretty nice 1K gold.
We meet this fella' near the Nashkel Inn.
Like hell I'm surrendering!
Prepare to have your work cut out!
Nimbul starts with a cheap move - mirror image.
I should learn it too someday.
The Codex counters with Magic Missile.
Two images are destroyed. Nimbul himself gets hit with one missile.
This guy's like a weaker Borda. No sweat!
Here, have another Magic Missile! Some Amnish soldiers join the fight on our side, but are pretty much useless.
Nimbul counters with his own MM, and it hurts.
You can say that again!
Nimbul! I'll cut your heart out with a spoon!
Shat in your pants, did you?
Apparently not.
Death count: 62
Reloading.
This isn't fucking fair. He was panicked, right? WHY DID HE ATTACK ME?
He must've really disliked you.
Har-dee-har-har. Let's do it right this time.
We start with Blur.
I would like to point out this is still the only protection spell I know.
Yeah, yeah. Move on.
I'll show you why!
This time we Horror as an opener.
And it works much better. The Codex start pounding at helpless Nimbul with Magic Missile.
This guy can definitely take some punishment.
Keep shootin'.
We run out of M&Ms, and Nimbul wears boots of avoidance so the bow is not very effective against him. Hence another tactics: charming him.
Really nice jacket there. I like the color.
It actually works.
Why wouldn't it?
We're out of Magic Missile, but Nimbul definitely isn't. We tell him to put it to good use.
One is enough to slay him.
How about you surrender, huh!? Oh, wait, you can't!
This guy has some nice loot.
Indeed.
Look, a ring of 'I want to be an elf'.
Useless for The Codex, will be sold.
Now, this is much better.
Finally, magic boots that don't suck!
Probably the second best boots in the game, after Boots of Speed, of course. This will lower The Codex' effective AC against missile weapons to -8, which is pretty damn good at this point.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next time: After this little breather episode, we enter Durlag's Tower of Doomy Doom.
Wait,
this was a breather episode?
