@Vault Dweller
It seems that I am fairly late in replying to this since most of the point of discontention have been covered by others. Still, let me comment on some of your questions.
The main thing that renders this "review" biased is the tone you guys employed. You can write a fun review. You can write a lulzy review. But you cannot write a sarcastic review and expect anyone to treat it seriously (as in "serious source of unbiased assessment") because this mode is not and should not be used for evaluating things.
Why not? Yes, the tone is mocking, but the review covers pretty much every aspect of the game, does it not? If you disagree with the tone, but not with the assessment, well...
You are basically stating - our way is the only right way of doing shit so STFU.
I don't see it this way. Care to elaborate?
Yes, the review covered all the major aspects of the game but the tone of the assessment undermind its credibility. With the sarcastic approach you distance yourself from the subject you are discussing. As I explained you assume the role of an authority of some kind who is basically stating - "this is how it should be done, and that how it should not." That's very convenient position for you but also very short-sighted - it implies that you may be biased in your judgement. So although you reasoning may be sound (and I concede that it IS sound), it will be turned upside down by the overabundance of irony in your statement. Suddenly you lose you authority and become a nagging grandpa complaining how kids these days are spoiled etc. etc. And that does happen - at least from a perspective of an outsider.
That would be quite OK if the game was complete rubbish in your opinion, but in the end you stated that you liked it, no matter it is not RPG. So where are the positive bits? What device did you use to create the contrast in the text? So much for consistency.
First, the positive bits are the graphics, setting, and characters. In this order. The rest is poorly designed. Second, you've assumed that the praise at the end was somehow different from the praise throughout the review, despite everything pointing at the obvious. I blame VoD. He made me tone that paragraph down, making it more subtle. Is that guy cynical or what?
Ok, so let's have a closer look at one of three points where you actually praised the game. I
underlined the sentences which contain genuine praise and
coloured bits where you criticise it. I also commented on them in
italics. So let's see what you can tell us about graphics:
Every review of The Witcher 2 needs a chapter on graphics, because not only it’s the best RPG since Dragon Age, it’s also the best looking game in a very long time. This is where the real depth of the game is. -> snarky as hell, nut let's say it's a praise. Surely in this paragraph you will analyse the depth of witcher's graphics - the art direction, the character design, the items etc... Right?
When the CDProjekt guys talked about having invented the best RPG engine in the world they apparently meant the best looking RPG engine.
The game is stunningly beautiful and crafted with love and affection. The amount of detail is mind boggling at times, especially if you have a rig powerful enough to play on maxed out settings. In fact, the Witcher 2’s visuals are a great reason to buy a new computer just to experience the game in all its otherworldly glory. -> A full paragraph of praise! Yupi Ka Yey Motherfucker!
While we’re on the subjects of graphics, let’s mention the interface. The Witcher had a very old school interface that was too busy and too distractive, with portraits of monsters, key NPCs, and various descriptions. Maybe, just maybe such journals were all the rage when games had wire-frame graphics, but as we’ve mentioned the game is absolutely gorgeous and there is no need to clutter the journal with crude drawings. ->Counterbalance for the positive bits I gather
Furthermore, in 2007 Mass Effect took the gaming world by storm. A big part of its success was attributed to a revolutionary and convenient list-based inventory. Many players bought the game just to see it and admire its elegant beauty, and we’d like to assure them that the Witcher 2 will not disappoint them. Scrolling through a listbox has never been so much fun. ->Fuckyeah, if can't find anything against the graphics let's take stuff from the different section of the review and put it here to create balance. Btw, the whole section about graphics - some depth mentioned but not described? Oh they are being ironic - this game must be fucking lame.
The praise and criticism overlaps because it's difficult to pinpoint irony exactly in the sentence. But anyway, it seems to me that even the aspect that gets recognised as outstanding is immediately counterbalanced by the bad bit. It actually seems there is more bashing out there than praise.
Balancing the positive parts with negative is actually quite a good idea in a review, helping you to preserve impartial voice. Pity it doesn't work well in your article because 1) You counterbalanced a positive aspect of graphics with irrelevant (in this context) commentary about atrocious design of inventories 2) In the whole review when you mention negative feature you don't balance it with a positive one 3) The sheer volume of bashing dwarfs the praise visually 4) While the negative assessment stands out thanks to very generous use of irony, the positive one has no device used that could emphasize its presence.
And at the end you state that TW 2 is a good game? Really? Where did you write that? What facts prove its worth paying my hard-earned money for? With so many few positive bits it’s apparently a miracle the publisher allowed its release. Bottom-line - the evaluation of separate pieces of the game is
inconsistent with you final assessment - a good game.
No, simply stating that the game is more
the game is more than the sum of its flawed parts is not enough. Especially when the "unflawed" parts are practically invisible.
If the latter, then what's exactly the point of trolling us with this?
Honestly? The review would have been much harsher if it was written in a serious tone.
From a perspective of an outsider I don’t care about it being harsher. As an ignorant individual, who hasn’t played the game I have come here for credible piece of info - whether the game is worth getting or not? Did I manage to receive that, from your review?
To sum up, your article is not a review - it cannot be because it fails at the very thing reviews are written for - to provide impartial, unbiased assessment of a piece of media. On the contrary, it is painfully apparent that the article was written with certain audience in mind to please them and to spark off a vibrant discussion. As such it is well-written feature article to have a few laughs amongst the friends, but it certainly not a review. Tell me now, please that you and VoD simply have superhuman insight and that crude ham-fisted sarcasm was simply means to achieve ingenious feat: to mirror with your article the way TW2 caters for wider audiences and sacrifices its solidity for the sake of recognition and the
buzz.
“Like the game it analyses, our article is a pretty thing indeed, and quite fun to read on the top of that, but it lacks the core that could make it a ‘review’. Although entertaining, it does not fulfill the aim it was written for. Hence, just like TW2, if you expect the real thing from it, think again. Unfortunately, it just might fail to meet your expectations, in spite of being an awesome piece, in the end” - this , I wish, is your message in the text. That would have been a really subtle irony. Me like! But somehow I cannot fool myself into believing it.