Review RPG Codex Review: Pillars of Eternity, by PrimeJunta

[FeelTheRads]

Whats your point, FeelTheRads? surprised someone likes the reviews best that coincides with his own opinion the most?

I don't know, ask the "this is not the real review because it doesn't say the game is awesome" people.
People like one and a half turd there.

That's THE review.

This is THE review, bro. Reviews are now political manifestos and we judge their value based on whether we agree with them or not.
Fuck facts, "obsidian gunna make awesum rpg someday believe me" is what a real review should sound like.

 

[Ulminati]

Everyone involved in writing that travesty should commit ritual suicide to remove the stain on their family's honor.

Almost as boring to read as it was to play PoE.

 

[Angthoron]

This posts expresses one or more of the following:

1) Incredulity
2) Celebration
2) Excitement
3) Lack of excitement
4) Outrage
5) Questioning of author's sexuality
6) Hailing the author as being excellent and/or impartial
7) Desire to write own, more objective and talented review
8) Accusations towards the staff
9) Hailing staff as smart and competent people
10) Other

Note: This form may be used for any and all future PoE reviews.

 

[One-and-a-half-Ivan]

Whats your point, FeelTheRads? surprised someone likes the reviews best that coincides with his own opinion the most?

I don't know, ask the "this is not the real review because it doesn't say the game is awesome" people.
People like one and a half turd there.

That's THE review.

This is THE review, bro. Reviews are now political manifestos and we judge their value based on whether we agree with them or not.
Fuck facts, "obsidian gunna make awesum rpg someday believe me" is what a real review should sound like.

Chill out, bro. I liked the review not due to the fact that it supports my opinion of the game but because it feels like a proper codexian review. What I mean is that it touches all the aspects of the game and gives a good summary of what's done nicely and what's done wrongly.
This is the kind of review we all enjoy here, don't we?

 

[Ellef]

This review is almost as boring as Pillars of Eternity.

Review by Prime Crybaby, edited by Obsidian forum Janitor, screenshots by neutral-positive comments only.

 

[hivemind]

Everyone involved in writing that travesty should commit ritual suicide to remove the stain on their family's honor.

Almost as boring to read as it was to play PoE.

that guy kinda looks like iren

 

[Duraframe300]

... and so the long and weary Codexian Civil War continued with no clear winner with many a wounded and butthurt member languishing in the many PoE review threads strewn throughout the forum...

Who knew a codex civil war could be this boring?

But in the age of decline,...

everything declines

 

[Ulminati]

that guy kinda looks like iren

 

[Irenaeus II]

The review was indeed awesome, as I said in page 1. Good job, Prime Junta (despite you being a communist) and Tigranes and all.

As for the bad taste people who hate good games with a passion, like Scrooge, Ulminati, Immortal, Night Goat and Lhynn, I've decided to not engage you, since I want my next ban to be about a different subject.

 

[PlanHex]

Worth noting is the excellent voice acting for the main antagonist: like David Warner with Jon Irenicus, Josh Brolin makes Thaos’s villain speeches sound like he means it.

Josh Brolin? What? No mention of him in the credits. And Thaos does not really sound like him.

On that note, anyone else thinks it's really annoying that it seems impossible to find out who voiced what in this damn game? Outside of the few people that are given characters on IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2461406/fullcredits?ref_=tt_cl_sm#cast

 

[Irenaeus II]

There was great voice acting in the game. I wish a complete (or completish) credit list was available indeed.

 

[Zorba the Hutt]

Josh Brolin? What? No mention of him in the credits. And Thaos does not really sound like him.

He voiced Thanos in Guardians of the Galaxy so I guess this was just an attempt at trolling.

 

[Irenaeus II]

Ugh don't remind me of that cinematic atrocity.

 

[markec]

So the Shill Brigade worked so long for this shit, its just hilarious. Im all for this review being linked on the curator page since shit game deserves shit review.

 

[Ulminati]

Narcissism

Nigga plz, you're as irrelevant as PoE at this point.

 

[Suicidal Meat Slapper]

Reading this felt like my mind was being fucked by liberals.

Spoiler

4 goddamn reviews for a single shitstorm while something that is actually a quality game such as Serpent In the Staglands is left with none?

 

[Cassidy]

Fourth a charm? No. Since a game must be played seven times, it must also have seven reviews. Only then can the cycle be complete and the Codex at last be returned to its hate-filled torpor.

Seven times? A lie needs to be repeated a thousand times to deceive the clueless to accept it as truth and this is only the second deceitful shill review: there are still 998 PR sellouts left.

I liked the review not due to the fact that it supports my opinion of the game but because it feels like a proper codexian review.

Kane & Lynch original review in Gamespot is more "Codexian" than this one, which, on the other hand, is totally fit for Gamespot, Kotaku or IGN. Beats it even in drama: a honest review for the first time that got a games journalist fired and the site where it happened dumped with goatses/"I'm 12 wat is this" vs. a crybaby fanboy beating apologism into a dying horse and occasional jabs in comments? No contest.

For those who want a Serpent In the Staglands review, it's futile. All whores like to pick an indie who can't afford them bribes as a punching bag and I wouldn't be surprised if insisting in having one soon would end with the usual suspects rushing a Pope Amole II "review" of it. Still would pale compared to K&L's review classical drama.

 

[Irenaeus II]

Narcissism

Nigga plz, you're as irrelevant as PoE at this point.

Are you having a bad cat day?

 

[Excidium II]

People crying for SitS review should write one. Reviews can't be published if they aren't submitted

 

[Irenaeus II]

PoE >>> SitS

 

[One-and-a-half-Ivan]

Kane & Lynch original review in Gamespot is more "Codexian" than this one, which, on the other hand, is totally fit for Gamespot, Kotaku or IGN. Beats it even in drama: a honest review for the first time that got a games journalist fired and the site where it happened dumped with goatses/"I'm 12 wat is this" vs. a crybaby fanboy beating apologism into a dying horse and occasional jabs in comments? No contest.

The fact that you hated the game doesn't mean that every positive review is bad.

 

[Irenaeus II]

Kane & Lynch original review in Gamespot is more "Codexian" than this one, which, on the other hand, is totally fit for Gamespot, Kotaku or IGN. Beats it even in drama: a honest review for the first time that got a games journalist fired and the site where it happened dumped with goatses/"I'm 12 wat is this" vs. a crybaby fanboy beating apologism into a dying horse and occasional jabs in comments? No contest.

The fact that you hated the game doesn't mean that every positive review is bad.

This will blow their minds.

 

[markec]

Says the people who think every negative review is not real.

 

[Bubbles]

People crying for SitS review should write one. Reviews can't be published if they aren't submitted

Tuluse is writing one. I'd be very surprised if we don't have it by September.

 

[Irenaeus II]

Says the people who think every negative review is not real.

My only complaint was the totally retarded Roxor review, which was very good trolling by DU, granted.

It was very well received by people who hate good games like PoE. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯