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Review RPGDot... <i>likes</i> Dungeon Lords?!

Roqua

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Volourn said:
LMAO

Comapring JE to Double Dragon yet trying to pretend that DL is a RPG.

In JE, the player does and can do the following:

- create a character and specialize the characters

- use three different dialogue skills that effect conversations in different ways

- complete quests in multiple ways

- interact with npcs in meaningful ways

- decide what to do, and how to do it

- make decisions that effect the game world, the PC, and the characters in the world

- earlier decisions can effect later quests in unforseen ways

But, yeah, JE is a Double Dragon retread. Idiot. :roll:


The bottom line is you don't know what a RPG is. Then again, you like DL and DS. That says everything.


R00fles!

I never said DL was an rpg, it is and always has been an action game.

Jade empire had a customization option that amounted to nothing, the styles all work out to be the same in a game more simple than patty cake. The choice of what ninja turtle to pick and their weapon usage had more of an impact on game play. The only styles that mattered where the alts that everyone had, other than that styles where eye candy. There is no inventory or equipment besides a necklace, which basiclaly equates to hearts in zelda, and zelda could upgrade his weapon also. Character devopment is on par with deciding to cum in your hand and washing it off, or cuming on the bathroom floor and whiping it up: it just doesn't matter. Character developmet was really wasted and useless code that only served the purpose of helping retards make the silly claimthat this game is actually an rpg.

As to all the choices you could make throughout the game: wow. A whopping bononza of being forced to choice the "I'm a super duper guy" response, or "I'm a big meany" respose. When those responses don't matter at all. The game is the same, the events are the same, you get one different quest going close fist, and one different going open palm. Woopity doo.
There is no role playing in this game.

And the main reason why this game is not a roleplaying game= the LAW of noncontradiction and the rule of consistency. No twitch game can be an rpg. I can't play a role and be myself at the same time. For a Jade Empire example, when the master kung-fu expert whose, character i was supoosedly playing, was kicking the crap out of the air facing away from the person I wanted him to fight, was not really consistent with his role of a master kung-fu expert. A master kung-fu expert would probably face his opponent and kick at him, because he has mastered his body movements. But since I the actual one that has complete control over his body, and he is limited by my poor reflexes and button clicking abilities, I am not playing a role. I am just playing myself. Same as in Mario Brothers and Double Dragon and Nija Turtles. In a real rpg, like Fallout, I decide how the character should react to the world, such as attack this man in this way, and my characters attributes and other variables, as well as those of the person he is attacking, and the rules of the world decide what happens. My personal traits, dexterity, button clicking, timing, and hand eye coordination have no part to play in it at all.

Because I am playing a role. Soemthing you dont do in Jade Empire. I wouldn't even say Jade Empire is an Action game w/ RPG elements. I would say that about Bloodlines, but not Jade Empire. I would say Jade Empire is an action game with an slightly interactive story (like a two branching choose your own adventure with the exact same adventure but the two branches have slightly different diaqlogue) and no rpg elements at all (since character creation, character development is pointless, and there is no roleplaying at all).

I gaurantee the not so bright, who choose to live in the land of make believe and fallacy will have some argument about how twitch action games can be rpgs. But there is no argument and no one will tackle the law of noncontradiction and the rule of consistency. The fact is I cannot play a role and be a role, and if I'm not playing a role I am not playing an rpg.

Shove that up your ass bitches.
 

Roqua

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P.s. I dont like and have never even come close to liking DS, you, Sir, are a liar and a child molestor. I stick up for DL because the game brings out what filthy hypocrites and how inconsistent everyone is. They follow the hate crowd like lemmings, and the hive mind sooths them and makes them feel warm, fuzzy, and is kind of homoerotic.
 

Roqua

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Naked_Lunch said:
If it has stats, it's an RPG, opinion of game nonwithstanding.

So Warcraft 3, republic the revolution, and many other non-rpgs are rpgs? That makes sense, retard. I guess if it has guns it is cyberpunk? And if it has boobs its porn. Pull the cock out of your ass and think for two seconds you fucking idiot.
 

Shagnak

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Roqua said:
P.s. I dont like and have never even come close to liking DS, you, Sir, are a liar and a child molestor. I stick up for DL because the game brings out what filthy hypocrites and how inconsistent everyone is. They follow the hate crowd like lemmings, and the hive mind sooths them and makes them feel warm, fuzzy, and is kind of homoerotic.
At first I thought you were a complete dick, not making much sense, and going on about gayness and cocks like the best closet arse-meister.
But now I release there is a sick poetry to your writing style. Keep it up :wink:
 

Sol Invictus

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Who leads the DL hate crowd? I'm pretty sure that DL's suckiness stands out for itself without anyone having to point out what shitty gameplay and incomplete production it seems to 'feature'.
 

Volourn

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Hahahahaha.


"The game is the same, the events are the same,"

You ahve not played the game obviously. Idiot.And, yes, you like DS. Just admit. It's nice that youd efend DL as a RPG; but that's ok Hey, at least your lies can be seen through easily.

Keep up the good work.


"there is no roleplaying at all)."

Lies.


"like a two branching choose your own adventure with the exact same adventure but the two branches have slightly different diaqlogue"

Lies.


Then again, you think the Fo series is not good so it's more proof your opinion is worthless. Worthless but fun.


R00fles!
 

Roqua

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Volourn said:
Hahahahaha.


"The game is the same, the events are the same,"

You ahve not played the game obviously. Idiot.And, yes, you like DS. Just admit. It's nice that youd efend DL as a RPG; but that's ok Hey, at least your lies can be seen through easily.

Keep up the good work.


"there is no roleplaying at all)."

Lies.


"like a two branching choose your own adventure with the exact same adventure but the two branches have slightly different diaqlogue"

Lies.


Then again, you think the Fo series is not good so it's more proof your opinion is worthless. Worthless but fun.


R00fles!

I wish people would actually read what I wrote instead of picking out words and filling in the rest with their imigainations, being the king of Crazy Jackass Stupid Land just gives you the right to say nonsense on your behalf--not mine.

First, SP, if you read what I said you would see I said Warcraft 3 isn't an rpg, no matter what site covers it as such.

Second, Volourn--what the fuck are you talking about? I have never said DL was an rpg. In fact I have said many times it is an action game. Action. A-C-T-I-O-N. Action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action action

Get it yet, stupid? Or do I need to spell it on your forhead with piss?

And I never even came close to liking DS. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast. I do not like DS, I have never said I liked DS, you are a liar and a pederast.

Figure that one out yet retard, or did you get disctracted by thoughts of naked children again?

And as I said, you would not be able to tackle the reason why a twitch game will never be an rpg. Stop dreaming about sucking on the ballsacks of 5 year old boys and pay the fuck attention, moron.

And I played and beat Jade Empire. I got the necklace from the perilous and twisted cave under the starting dojo area. I blew up many space ships with the fancy mini game. I talked to the imiginary game playing kung-fu masters of the different philosophies. I stopped the bully lady from beating up the guy, and got her married. I blew up more bad guys in their ship. I infiltraded the enemy pirate base and got the inventor. Me and the inventor figured out he was a god. Went to the city, helped at the graveyeard before joining the badguys. Took over a dojo. Beat the emperer up. Beat his brother up. Won game. Same thing both times through. Nothing changed, good guy, bad guy, doesn't matter.

Jade Empire is a worthy, thoughtless, mindless, easy, simple, action game. But when you judge by rpg criteria it falls flat in every catagory besides the super duper duel path light side/dark side stupidness that is stupid and useless, and the law of noncontradiction firmly places it in the non rpg catagory with Double Dragon and Ninja Turtles.

And saying I dont like FO, a game I play and love, and I know I one of the few people or the only person banned from the Iplay forums for saying a non TB, streamlined, dumbed down FO3 wasn't a real FO while every one else was sucking on sawyers balls.
 

Volourn

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As I thought, you didn't play JE. And, you agaian admit you like DS, think that DL is a RPG, and despise FO.

Thanks for proving your retardedness again, fucknuts.


Hahahha.

Moron.

Tool.


R00fles!


Go, and play your precious DS. :D
 

Roqua

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Volourn said:
As I thought, you didn't play JE. And, you agaian admit you like DS, think that DL is a RPG, and despise FO.

Thanks for proving your retardedness again, fucknuts.


Hahahha.

Moron.

Tool.


R00fles!


Go, and play your precious DS. :D

I will. Take that, bitch.
 

DarkUnderlord

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Roqua said:
Get it yet, stupid? Or do I need to spell it on your forhead with piss?
You can do that? All those who want to see Roqua write in urine on Volurn's head say "I".

I.
 

Fez

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Aye/I.

Some kind of webcam with a .mov download put up later for those who missed the live show would be good.
 

Roqua

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Claw said:
You've convinced me



that you are an utter moron.

You've convinced me

that you can type in really small letters and you are a cuntfaced jackass with a penis smaller than the letters you can type in, and that you should be raped by long haired leaping gnomes and their unshowered hippy sidekicks. I'm going to smack the bitch out of you with all 2 inches of my big black cockasaurus, piss in all your orifices, and make you eat my dingleberries. Then I'm going to shove a toilet up your ass and throw my shit at you. Then I'm going to take you to the zoo and make you throw your shit at monkeys for my amusment. Then I'll stab you repetedly in the facial area with a hardened piece of shit. Then I'm going to bring you to mexico to enter you into a donkey show, but that is more for humiliation than pain since the toilet will probably stretch out your anal cavity enough than a big donkey dick won't even bother you. And I'm also convinced you, Sir, are an utter moron, and probaby a pedophile who prancess around in his mother's underwear singing songs from The Sound of Music and hoping to one day get his big breakthrough and be casted in the hit show Stomp, where you could be around your own people, the queer dancers who stomp a lot.
 

Saint_Proverbius

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I'm willing to say that Dungeon Lords is an RPG. It's a dungeon crawler and while they may not be the greatest in terms of role playing experiences, offering a lot of options to how things are handled, they still fit the bill. The problem is that the bar keeps slipping for dungeon crawlers rather than going up.
 

LlamaGod

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Roqua said:
Shagnak said:
And god forbid that other people might disagree with the reviewer.
Terrible.

Yes, especially when everyone will jump on board the Hellgate London gay train and cum all over each other in excitment on how fucking rad and tubular it is. Twitch is twitch, they're all fucking gay and none of them are rpgs. But now the lemmings are going to be picky and choosy about which gay game is gay enough to get flamed? Things get all confusing when people start classifying different levels of gayness and rating the gay games with real games, and then flaming people who judged a gay game less gay than it should have been. Its all gay to me. Queers.

EXITIUM DOES NOT = RPGCODEX, YOU STUPID FUCKING SHITBIRD

And I liked Cops 2170 and hated Dungeon Lords. Shut the fuck up and learn about what you speak about.

I've seen RPGDot's reviews and they always give 60% if the game just installs and they just talk about how the game is great and dispite being a pile of shit THE CINEMATICS ARE VERY NICE 80%!!!!!!!!! A+++++++++ WOULD BLOWJOB AGAIN

Like I said, if there was 4 games presented before them, and say 3 games are shitty and 1 is great, RPGDot will say all 4 are great 'in their own rights' or some pussy bullshit.
 

Roqua

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LlamaGod said:
Roqua said:
Shagnak said:
And god forbid that other people might disagree with the reviewer.
Terrible.

Yes, especially when everyone will jump on board the Hellgate London gay train and cum all over each other in excitment on how fucking rad and tubular it is. Twitch is twitch, they're all fucking gay and none of them are rpgs. But now the lemmings are going to be picky and choosy about which gay game is gay enough to get flamed? Things get all confusing when people start classifying different levels of gayness and rating the gay games with real games, and then flaming people who judged a gay game less gay than it should have been. Its all gay to me. Queers.

EXITIUM DOES NOT = RPGCODEX, YOU STUPID FUCKING SHITBIRD

And I liked Cops 2170 and hated Dungeon Lords. Shut the fuck up and learn about what you speak about.

I've seen RPGDot's reviews and they always give 60% if the game just installs and they just talk about how the game is great and dispite being a pile of shit THE CINEMATICS ARE VERY NICE 80%!!!!!!!!! A+++++++++ WOULD BLOWJOB AGAIN

Like I said, if there was 4 games presented before them, and say 3 games are shitty and 1 is great, RPGDot will say all 4 are great 'in their own rights' or some pussy bullshit.

You're very angry for a llama. I think its great you liked cops 2170, I thought it was okay and a lot better than Paradise Cracked. So you liked a game and would rate it higher than other reviewers, but if a staff member at rpgdot does this the whole site loses credibility? Unlike most of the reviews I saw of DL, the review of it from rpgdot showed the reviewer is an rpg fan and not some dickhead drooling over hellgate london and doom 4 and pissed he got stuck with reviewing a stupid non leet game. In fact, he knew he was going to catch shit for reviewing it as he saw fit and not going with the rest of the angry community, and the other staff at rpgdot. That shows he has balls and autonomy and isn't a fucking lemming.

You don't like DL, woopity fucking doo. I'm sorry I attacked hellgate london, I'm sure your review of it will be gushing with queerness and show how leet it is and how all the cool kids love it. You, excitum and the rest of rpgcodex's staff can all get together and do a circle jerk and cum all over the hellgate london box, and bury it in a time capsule, and then show all your pussy grandkids what a real rpg is like, and what a bunch of guys cum looks like after stagnating for 50 years. Then you can all make-out like back in the old days and then molest your grandkids. I don't give a shit what you sick-o's do. Just leave my grandkids out of it. Cuntface.
 

Roqua

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DarkUnderlord said:
Roqua said:
very intelligent comentary, etc..
I find children attractive and want to lick their cute little bum holes clean of the evil corruption in the world. I hump the cushons on my couch because it feels good. I want to see Roqua's big black cock spray urine over someone's head while I masterbate, because it is ditrty and erotic and I'm a sick-o

Keep your pants on.
 

DarkUnderlord

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Roqua said:
more gay cum homosexual stuff blah blah etc...
Still waiting.
 

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