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Community So long, farewell, Pawel Kaczarewski

udm

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Aug 14, 2008
Messages
2,921
Make the Codex Great Again!
Damn. I always enjoyed reading SuicideBunny's :obviously: posts. One of the few Codexians I usually agree with. :salute: wherever you are bro...
 

Xi

Arcane
Joined
Jan 28, 2006
Messages
6,101
Location
Twilight Zone
Quick, get him to the temple for resurrection. If we wait too long his corpse will be too decayed!
-----------
Wishing you all the best in your after life adventure. You will be missed bro. :obviously:
 

Sòren

Arcane
Joined
Aug 18, 2009
Messages
2,561
this is somewhat strange and touching...i didnt know him, never had anything to do with him, but i have been reading his posts here for over 5 years and hearing that he died that young is just really...


Es wird gesät verweslich, und wird auferstehen unverweslich. Es wird gesät in Unehre, und wird auferstehen in Herrlichkeit. Es wird gesät in Schwachheit, und wird auferstehen in Kraft.
 
Joined
May 6, 2009
Messages
1,876,816
Location
Glass Fields, Ruins of Old Iran
dramatic reenactment of SuicideBunny's last moments

f1nSyL.jpg
 

Skeletor

Learned
Joined
Apr 2, 2015
Messages
6
Location
Germany
(I just joined this forum after reading all the posts about Pawels passing and I decided to reply here by writing an obituary, hoping that I might bring a little more knowledge about who Pawel was to you and maybe to speak for his other friends, too. If the mods of this forum find this unfitting, feel free to move / edit / shorten / delete this post in any way you like. I also want to say that Im not the one who told the mods about Pawels death, just to avoid confusion)

I met Pawel while I was in grammar school here in Duesseldorf, Germany, he was in a parallel class. Since we both shared an interest in gaming and pen&paper RPG, there was always some opportunity for chat and discussions, and some of my earliest role playing groups were with Pawel, him sometimes being the GM.
Standing over 2 meters tall, Pawel was always a commanding figure, and never had any problems with wearing the things he liked (usually a long coat), no matter what other people thought about him.

After we took our A-levels our direct contact ceased somewhat, since we both started to study different things in different cities, but around 2004 our paths crossed once again, since I switched to his discipline (computer science) and back here to Duesseldorf, while he kept the discipline but also moved back here.
At first, I hoped that we could do lots of stuff together at university, but Pawel showed only a limited interest in studying and didn't show up too often on campus since he spend most of his time gaming (the number of games on his steam account has already been mentioned, I think it speaks for itself), drawing / designing campaigns or adventures for P&P RPGs or even wholly new games.

This lead to another common interest, since I chose to start out an indie game as a sort of programming exercise when I was in my second semester which in turn resulted in the most intense phase of our friendship, with him showing up every two weeks for some time at my place and the two of us drawing, designing and debating indie game concepts and mechanics.
I also remember him showing me this forum during one of these meetings, but my game is turn based strategy, so I didn't see the point in registering in a RPG forum.
We also started a RPG group playing Legend of the Five Rings with Pawel, a common friend, my wife and me as participants and which is still playing (funnily even this saturday).

Around 2012, Pawel left the group since moved to relatives in Poland and continued to study there, which reduced our contact to an "hey, how are you?" email every half a year. I would have liked to have more contact to him, but once again, he drew himself out, only this time he stated "too much to do at university" as the reason.

So I hoped to continue our gamedesign meetings after he'd finish his studies in Poland and eventually return to Dusseldorf, and my first thought when I received an email from a friend with only his first name as subject was "great, maybe he's in town for some time or he even finished his studies and coming back altogether".
Upon reading the mail and learning that he will never return since he died in Poland I only thought "this can't be true, this just CAN'T be true, this must be some bitter kind of joke", and this feeling grew even stronger when another friend told me he died just after finishing his studies there.

Now, a few weeks have passed and I concentrate on continuing my work (as well as finally finishing the game I started) but I still think a lot about him and miss him. But I will put a dedication to him in my game and maybe name an NPC after him if I find a suiting match in order to keep his memory alive.

My wife told me after his death that a particular L5R campaign the designed (and which centered around the exploration of a long forgotten and only recently rediscovered island in Rokugan) and GMed was the finest campaign she played so far and I think this is a pretty good example for why I and many others admired him so much.
I only wish he would have been able to finish more of his projects and share them with the world, but I guess he always had a fear of doing his own work not perfectly, which kept him from finishing / releasing his works just as it caused him to stay in his course of study for so many years.

So, in the end, also from my side: Farewell, Pawel, wherever you may be, I hope you're happy now and I miss you.
 

Amasius

Augur
Joined
Sep 24, 2006
Messages
959
Location
Thanatos
I'm amazed, that a Codex regular had real friends... just kidding, welcome. This place might be a shithole, but if you aren't easily offended it can also be quite fascinating. Oh - and you might be wrong about this one: "but my game is turn based strategy, so I didn't see the point in registering in a RPG forum." Many people here - myself included - care more about turnbased games in general than about non-turnbased RPGs.
:salute:
 

Burning Bridges

Enviado de meu SM-G3502T usando Tapatalk
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
27,571
Location
Tampon Bay
It is really disturbing to think about that if SuicideBunnyy's close friend wouldn't have made an account here and told the mods what happened, we never knew about it. He would have just disappeared from the Codex without a word.

Yeah, who knows how many people who disappear from online communities die instead of merely fading out? The internet is such a new thing we're really unused to the idea someone far away can die, as if said someone is just a computer program that's always on, rather than a breathing person. Heck, one week without internet and people on the Codex think I got machete raped - not without cause, mind you, my country is a veritable warzone, but I digress.

Yes, the thought has often crossed my mind, that often when no one one informs the forum, a lot of these people are actually dead.
 

Zewp

Arcane
Joined
Sep 30, 2012
Messages
3,616
Codex 2013
I used to just think that people who disappeared from online communities probably just grew up and got new commitments/responsibilities and ditched the community, but a few years ago someone I knew posted after a long hiatus saying they had been fighting cancer on and off for a while, which made it hard for him to use a computer because he was hospitalized so frequently.

It's a little jarring when you realise that the people behind the nicks are just normal people who also have to deal with the mundane issues of everyday life.
 

Skeletor

Learned
Joined
Apr 2, 2015
Messages
6
Location
Germany
Thank you for your kind words (or memes), Ninjerk and Amasius..

I will introduce my own project in a separate thread, but it will take some days before I find the time to compile all the images and write up a summary.

Oh, and Im not afraid of web communities with a rather rude tone (or at least I think I do) :salute:
 

waywardOne

Arcane
Joined
Aug 28, 2010
Messages
2,318
Alright, fuck this. I didn't even know he was a mod when I decided to rage 2 years ago, challenging any authority here on common sense policy. Now, after I return and make an apology to him, I discover he has died. This is the ultimate troll, to not even let me apologize over a totally inconsequential tiff. I salute thee, SB, and shall continue our inconsequential tiff at a later date, when I join you in the hereafter.

:salute:
 

Skeletor

Learned
Joined
Apr 2, 2015
Messages
6
Location
Germany
Nearly six months now since Pawels passing, but Im still thinking of him..

The last few months very terribly busy (thats the reason why I didn't introduce my indie game project here already) and my latest client so far is a private school teaching game design, who asked me if Id be able to teach some game programming lessons.

I remember how enthusiastic Pawel was when I told him that a school teaching game development courses opened in our city, and so I immediately had the thought "I gotta tell Pawel about this, can't wait to hear if he is awed or just jealous" in my head.

Since there is no way to tell him anymore, I decided I would honor him in my very first lesson.


IMG_1114.jpg
 

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