praetor
I agree that Jesters is OP at lower levels (<200) mainly because so many rely on elemental infusion and buffing for extra damage. At this point I have pretty much forsaken all elemental damage (other than spells and resins) in favor of pure phys and so Jesters only cancels backstabs when I'm up against it, which is fine IMO. I hate backstabs so I don't mind when people use it. I do agree, however, that it is pretty OP against a dedicated caster or anyone who uses purely infused weapons. the 74 resistance it gives across is basically 8% damage reduction on all elements.
To me, being able to swap 1 of 50 gowers rings is a much bigger issue and the closest to a definition of "try hard" I have encountered so far (despite the 'communities' use of it to describe people who min-max).
MapMan
Ok, let's start like this. Do you like to be defensive in pvp? (hold shield up, let enemy make first move, react to them, etc.)
If you do prefer to be defensive then great shield + long weapon like a greatsword or spear is a good option. You'll want to be under 70% equip load to roll and you'll also want to practice timing your blocks so you don't keep getting guard broken left and right.
Do you want to be aggressive? For now, I suggest using a quick weapon like a straight sword, katana, dagger, curved sword, or thrusting sword. The heavier/slower weapons (especially ultra great weapons) leave you with glaring openings and often are more effective when playing without lock-on -- a bit more advanced. I'd suggest using something like one of the new straight swords and testing that out to see how you like being on the offensive.
Depending on which stats you have and which moveset you like more -- try out the ashen warrior sword (especially 2handed), the red rust scimitar (again, 2 handed), the rapier or espada ropera (either 2h or 1h) or the black flamestone dagger (2h) or manikin dagger (2h). For katanas you should check out the manslayer or the chaos blade -- they both have some quirks to them. You'll want to time your hits to take advantage of their 150 counter which does 50% more damage when you hit your enemy during an 'action' (attack, roll, item use, cast, etc.).
As for stats... honestly, we can talk about minmaxing and what have you but in truth it comes down to what weapons you want to use and what spells you want to use. Like a weapon that has an A scaling in dex? Get dex. Like using hexes? Evenly distribute faith/int. Like heavy weapons? Get str. Regardless of the differences, stamina is very important, so everyone wants high endurance and you're going to want at least around 1.6k hp to be able to take 4+ hits to be killed. At low hp you'll die in two swipes. You can use the dragon rings or the life ring to compensate for hp. Right now with 3rd dragon and life ring +3 I'm at almost 3k hp which is worth more to me than another 1000 armor of any type.
Anyway, give some more info and we can better give you advice.