After buying DS2 on the Steam sale, I set aside a significant part of my Xmas hollidays to playing it. I have now completed it and gosh darn it if it wasn't one of the most enjoyable little trollgames I've played this year.
Some assorted thoughts:
- Took me about 45 hours to beat on a no magic claymore and shield heavy armour dude. Probably a few hours less than that, since I go AFK a lot and kept standing around waiting for my health to regen via the healing ring before I worked out I could buy infinite healing stones from the cackling old woman in town. I was level 145 at the end of the game, which is supposedly like 20 levels over par, but hey, I never found that I was grinding shit mindlessly for das expees.
- It seemed like the plot completely lost itself after a while. The initial "cursed soul heads to cursed ruin kingdom to find cure for his own undeath" thing as described in the intro was a good hook, but actually curing yourself seemed to completely take a backseat to the "kill bosses, git great souls!" that became the order of the day shortly after even entering Manjuice. And after finding the King, it became even more confusing - why was the final boss Gravelord Nito in drag and why did my character decide to make himself King of the Shit Kingdom after killing her instead of finding some way of restoring his humanity? Is this some Japanese cunt joke that white cunts don't get? Most folks seem to justify the illogical plot by writing lengthy fanfictions about their speculations, so I guess DS2 is a lot like KOTOR 2 writing-wise.
I really liked the "bossfight" with the king, though - after killing his loyal henchman, I was surprised to find that the hyped king of the land was basically an un- and braindead naked retard aimlessly dragging his 12 foot sword in circles, his mighty armour discarded in a corner with the quest item up for grabs without even a fight. Anything that happened after that was confusing. Why did I have to enter the memories of a dead giant to kill his king during their invasion ages ago? And why did doing this grant me access to the king's throne room and final bossfight?
- Way too many of the puzzles are ridiculously obscure and pretty much require spoilering. The most ridiculous example of this was the medusa bossfight - if you just enter the boss chamber when you meet her, you will never, ever win due to the fight arena being knee deep in poison which heals her and kills you. Apparently, the way to REMOVE this bullshit poison pool was to set fire to a windmill you briefly passed half an hour earlier. Nowhere was this even alleged to or mentioned by any NPC that I encountered or anything I read and it does not even make much sense logically. How people even worked this out in the first place is beyond me, but this was some serious bullshit, mang.
Another terrible offender was the miracle lady. After talking to her in the Tower of Heide, I had zero reason to check the basement in Manjuice where she had moved to, where she could open up literally 1/4th of the game. At least move her somewhere you might accidentally see her for fuckssakes!
- The "respawns are limited" thing that die-harders rage about is pretty much an utter non-issue. Literally the only place I ran through enough times to make the mobs stop spawning was the Heide Tower of Fire, and that was just because I farmed the slow knights for easy early game levels I ended up not really needing.
- The emerald lady trainer is annoying and it does break immersion when you need to teleport out of the evil dungeon of buttrape you're currently exploring to level and have a good cry on her shoulder. Would prefer to level at bonfires instead - would keep the feeling of immersion in a dark world where everything fucking hates you and wants you to die much better.
- Dark Souls is one of the better MMOs I've played recently. Seriously. Once I worked out how to summon other players to assist me in the most fuck-you-ish areas such as the knight-crowded stairs to the Ancient Dragon and the Saving Private Ryan reenactment that makes up parts of the Amana level, it became a million times easier and was fun to boot. I'd have had zero chances of beating bosses like the Pursuer or Ruin Sentinels if it hadn't been for assists from people with names usually on the lines of Pig******. The best bit about the co-op is the way there are significant rewards to helping others, both in terms of souls, smooth&silky stones/sun tokens and in regaining your lost humanity. Before entering a fog gate, I'd usually throw down a summoning sigil and assist another player in tackling whatever boss was ahead, just so I could see what to expect.
- I did get invaded like 6 times or so in my playthrough and died in all but 1 of them. Apparently, the PKs had encountered my "keep spamming claymore stabs" tactic before and it impressed them less than it did the standard AI phantoms. Didn't mind too much though, they were infrequent enough to add tension to the game without being ragequit-inducing in any way. I like co-op way better, though.
- Difficulty was a bit up and down. The fight that made me rage the most was the Pursuer in the early game, but other bosses which were supposedly difficult I managed to breeze through, most notable Freja with her ultra-telegraphed lazor blasts and the mirror knight, who was just yet another huge dude with telegraphed sword stabs and a weak summon. Other bosses were ludicruously easy for as long as I remembered to equip the correct shield. I don't think the Guardian Dragon hit me even once after I equipped the 100% fire resistance shield. The final boss was almost disappointingly simple to beat, although I did have a co-op bro to help me kill her. Hugely telegraphed attacks and a lot of just standing there looking menacing while I chopped her butt up.
It did take me a lot of time to figure out the patterns of some of the bosses, which made me die about half a dozen times to even the Last Giant on my first character. I now just beat him on a dual-wielder without getting hit once. Nice to see I've actually learned something!
Contrary to most folks, I did not find the Shrine of Amana to be that bad. Equip magic resistance shield, rush up to homing missile witches and kill them, rush back into cover to heal up if you got hit a few times. I died a lot of times in the 2nd part of the level with the invading AI red phantom, but it really felt like more of a chore and test of patience than a real challenge to player skill level.
I thought the Dragon Shrine staircase was the hardest part of the game. Multiple giant knights who hit twice as hard and fast as the ones in Heide tower and me with no magic to kite them. Fuck you, Dragon Shrine, fuck you very much! I didn't even try fighting the "boss" of that area. 100 foot long bronze dragon on a platform without cover? Nah, I'll pass, thanks.
- DS2 is motherfucking huge! Checking the wiki, I saw at least 5 bosses I'd not even encountered and several NPCs I'd never met, and that's not even counting the DLC. Great to see games making a lot of genuine content and making it difficult to access high-quality areas. I was also impressed with the way they made a lot of different enemy types and then used some only a few times. The mutated turd-golems under the Sinner's Rise for instance - there were only 3 of them, but a huge amount of creativity clearly went into their design and combat movesets, which made them all the more memorable for me than if they'd been put around every corner for the rest of the game.
- Losing max HP and the ability to summon upon death is kind of bullshit, but for someone as endeared with the co-op as me, it was just kind of a "goody, more chance to co-op, yay!" feeling. I barely spent any effigies to re-humanise myself.
All in all, DS2 is a great game. I wish DS1 was not unplayable on PC or I sure would give that a go next. For as long as I could rely on other players to win most of my bossfights for me, of course.