Editorial Top Ten Worst CRPGs

[Kaanyrvhok]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

Plus it was released like yesterday. Including such games in "Best / Worst of" lists is against my policy, for a more objective review you should wait until the dust settles down and the smell of new dissipates away.

Why did he put Dungeon Siege 3 in there then? In his defense, he probably didn't play Dragon Age 2.

Or better yet why did he put Dragonlance:Heroes of the Lance? That game was a pure sidescroller. He was including action RPGs and its no wonder DA 2 didnt make the list. DA 2 looked like the typical EA cash in from day one so he probably didnt play it.

 

[Konjad]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

It is, and it is a good one.

 

[J_C]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

It is, and it is a good one.

Where is your review by the way? If they don't post it on the Codex, put it up somewhere else, we are very interested in it.

 

[Outmind]

I was pleasantly surprised to see m&m on that list. That game was utter crap

 

[Konjad]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

It is, and it is a good one.

Where is your review by the way? If they don't post it on the Codex, put it up somewhere else, we are very interested in it.

I will, the problem is they don't tell me whether they will post it or not. DU just keeps saying to wait a few more days.

 

[Wyrmlord]

There is no such thing as a bad RPG.

Only a guilty pleasure.

 

[commie]

He's trying to make a list of worst 10 games in a category, and he fails to provide ONE single targeted criticism for ANY of them? And that's with the likes of MM9 and DtU on there? I mean, it's fucking MM9, and all you can criticize is "Simplistic character creation. Slow start. Lack of choice."? LACK OF CHOICE? In a fucking Might and Magic game?

Good god Matt, you suck.

Also, the lack of any pre-mid 90's CRPG is duly noted. He really should try Fountain of Dreams one of these days. I'm trying to remember some of the horrid CRPG's of my youth but it seems I've mentally blocked them out.

Half of these are "mediocre" rather than "truly terrible", and I agree this includes POR. Sure, it had a bug that made it erase your entire drive, and that alone is worth laughing at it until the end of time, but the game itself was nowhere near the utter mess that were DtU or Fountain of Dreams.

Indeed, I recently tried out PORMD with all the essential patches and it was actually ok. I'll give it a longer go eventually to see if it's just me expecting the greatest turd of all time and being generous that it wasn't.

Oblivion is certainly worse than most on the list, not mentioning Arcania.

 

[Menckenstein]

Clearly Matt has never known the joys of building a staircase out of swords or using a loaf of bread as an elevator to skip 90% of a game.

 

[Sceptic]

LoL is an RPG?

First one? definitely. LOL3? Erm... yeah not so much. Definitely not any more than a TES.

I recently tried out PORMD with all the essential patches and it was actually ok. I'll give it a longer go eventually to see if it's just me expecting the greatest turd of all time and being generous that it wasn't.

It's not a good game by any means, but it's not as terrible as widely advertised. Its biggest problems are the uninstall bug (fixed by patch), the slow speed (fixed by unofficial utility), and the general blandness of the dungeon (unforutnately not fixable). It's a long and boring game, but not the utter horrible turd that say Arcania or Oblivion are. And definitely not on par with DtU, which is just unplayable.

 

[Shannow]

Actually it's biggest problems are that you cannot chose your feats when levelling up, are force-levelled after acquiring enough XP and you don't get max HP when levelling up. (Ok, HD wipe bug is worse, but from actual game related stuff these are the worst, IMO.)


Disclaimer: Yeah, I hate random stat/HP increases when levelling up. Just put in options of:
Hardcore - you get what you get.
Best of 3 for players and monsters.
Best of 5 for players and monsters.
Max for players and monsters.
Point buy for stats.

 

[Silellak]

Yeah the combat system was broken and the story wasn't up to ultima standards but who gives a shit when you can travel through britannia in full 3d?

There's nothing "Britannia" about the world you "explore" (if a "linear railroad" can be called exploration) in Ultima IX.

 

[meanwhileInPoland]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

It is, and it is a good one.

you fucked up konjad. waited too long and builded too much pressure and now no matter what did you includ in that review it will be below expectations you will not troll me into replaying this game

 

[Azalin]

Surprisingly there are no Bethesda games on that list,maybe Matt is waiting for Skyrim?
But i have to say

I LIKED ALPHA PROTOCOL THIS MUCH!

 

[Xor]

Dragon Age 2 isn't an RPG.

It is, and it is a good one.

What happened Konjad, you used to be a bro.

 

[dr. one]

Bringing Alpha Protocol into this was a major fuck up, that´s for sure.

 

[DraQ]

LoL is an RPG?

First one? definitely.

Well, the first one had about three stats (use based), poor RT actiony combat (popamole, with moles being action icons lighting up) and was horribly linear.

Not that it didn't have certain magic to it nor wasn't pretty enjoyable to play (unlike, say TES IV), but chances are TES VII will still be more of an RPG and a more complex game than the original LoL.




It will probably still use physics to a much lesser extent than LoL 1, though.

 

[Ruprekt]

You can play LoL 1 in ScummVM so it can't be an RPG.

 

[villain of the story]

Why is Alpha Protocol even on that list? It's an honest-to-god action adventure game. Just because Obsidian made it doesn't mean it's supposed to be RPG by default.

 

[Clockwork Knight]

Yeah the combat system was broken and the story wasn't up to ultima standards but who gives a shit when you can travel through britannia in full 3d?

There's nothing "Britannia" about the world you "explore" (if a "linear railroad" can be called exploration) in Ultima IX.

That's an interesting point...if Garriot himself says it IS Britannia...can you disagree?

 

[mondblut]

7 non-RPGs and 3 very boring and mediocre, but certainly not worstest evar ones. Fail.

 

[J1M]

Also there is a surprising lack of TES games in that list.

It's a list for RPGs.

LoL is an RPG?

I didnt click the link because it looked stupid.

 

[Metro]

I like his videos but I was expecting a bit more intellectual criticism from an English professor -- especially in the written media as opposed to YouTube.

Being an English professor doesn't mean that you are a great game critic.

No but you'd expect less turd puns.

 

[Multi-headed Cow]

Alpha Turd strikes again.

 

[GreyViper]

Rather odd choices and AP a cRPG, since when? Also dont understand, his hatred for Skullkeep 2. And no EOB 3 or Menzobranza on the list.

 

[Kaanyrvhok]

Why is everyone bothered with AP being called an RPG when Heroes of the Lance is on the list?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUHUzt7-sy8
Compared to that AP is the Ben Hur of RPGs

 

[DalekFlay]

Alpha Protocol being on there would bother me less if he really bothered to say what was wrong with it. Saying it was "buggy" is pretty vague and honestly most people confuse buggy with unpolished when they are two very different things. Maybe he played the Xbox version though, I hear the game is much worse on there (which is funny considering it was the lead platform).

As for the other list nothing too special there... okay games you could fall in love with if you played them at the right time or shared a special interest in the subject matter.

 

[commie]

Well if Heroes of the Lance is on it so should Dragons of Flame. The only cool thing that game had was the ever encroaching army giving a sense of real urgency to what you have to do and where to go. I wish other games with the 'evil army is coming to fuck everything up' plot actually had such a thing instead of letting you the hero of the universe have time to leisurely help every poxy stranger you come across with gathering herbs and delivering letters.

Apart from that, there are literally dozens of far shittier games than those on the list, modern and 'classic'. Like monblut said, it's a fail list of merely mediocre stuff, far less offensive to the sensibilities than something like Arcania which would deserve to be there along with any of those WJRPG knockoffs that a million shitty indies are vomiting up almost every day.