As I've been getting some hopeful results with different dry eye supplements, I am cautiously looking into Compound again. Shadows under objects are disabled, but I dunno if it looks better this way.
Meanwhile I had time to rethink why my enthusiasm for Compound disappeared, and how to make it reappear again. I rewatched the
old videos which captured my initial enthusiastic
spirit. I also consulted a meditation teacher about it...
... and stumbled upon the simple realization that the more I worry about sales, market appeal, or even Codex/NMA appeal, the
more I lose interest in the project. Alternatively, the more I channel what _I_ want to see, and completely wall off other people, I can sense the enthusiasm returning.
The truth is, it was never going to be, and never will be, JA2 or X-Com. Not to compare myself to Tim Cain, but our _interests_ were similar. I don't care to invent a better plasma gun, I really don't give a shit about it - zero shits given.
I am far more interested in managing the overall sense of a living world, and not through superficial graphical details, but through, how do I put it, NOT BEING RETARDED.
Fallout's greatest overall accomplishment was that it was NOT RETARDED. Look at Fallout 3. Retarded. KOTOR. Retarded. Dragon Age. Retarded. Skyrim. Retarded. Mass Effect. Retarded. Witcher... kind of retarded.
I am interested in making characters that are compact, easy to understand, and yet may not be telling the whole truth, thus making them more than "NPC quest kiosks". I am interested in pushing combat into foreground as one of the basic systems, rather than THE system of progression.
I want a world that gives the player the _opportunity_ to immerse himself, without pushing sob stories. If something emotional does come out of it, it's not because the player was commanded to "feel", but because player chose to do so.
Most games have sterile lifeless worlds filled with Asperger NPCs, and then slam EMOTION TIME down player's throat at a triggered time, with subtlety of late George Lucas.
Finally, I want a world that rewards player for being at least a little bit clever. Not to go as far as pixel hunting, but poking and prodding should yield some reward.
In short, there's only a point in doing this if I do it my way. That's where the energy comes from. If my dry eye supplements keep working, I may just resume working on the project.
Mass-appeal, profit margins and expectations can all go collectively fuck themselves.