Review Of Monsters, Men and BROche

[el Supremo]

The shitty trees full of passives is one of the big reasons I stopped playing the game in Chapter 1. Nothing kills the motivation to advance and level your character better than boring talents/skills.

But rising your strength, or dexterity, or mana, is fun.

 

[Storyfag]

Hahahahaha, excellent stuff! Now I won't need to write it


However, one thing:

You describe the quest with Malena that no matter what you do, you end up in an ambush. This is not quite true.

Maybe I found some supersuper secret way of doing this, but when I took the quest, I was led to a cave full of nekkers, in front of which was Malena surrounded by a bunch of guards. Inside the cave I could find dead guardsmen, killed by Scoia'tel arrows. Leaving the cave, I could tell the guards what I had found, and they'd take the woman to Loredo for a 'trial'. No ambush.

That is one of the options, yes. Another interesting outcome is availible if you take on this quest after cutting a deal with Iorveth and lie to the guards about Malena's involvement

 

[mikaelis]

Well, I am not raging like Mrowak (though I am having my own share of beverage as well at this very moment ), but hell if I disagree with him at some points.
I am not butthurt about Twitcher 2 really. It's an average game with great presentation. I would rate it probably somewhat a bit higher than Alpha Prololol (not much though). And Twitcher was helluva better (Yeah fuck off haters).
It is the way this review was constructed that I cringed a little in my mouth.
Pastiche would be more appropriate name for this article, I guess. And it is generally very well written, btw. I even had lots of fun reading through it. But then:

What was the point in putting it as a review?

More importantly, what is the point of the last paragraph?

If it really was intended as satire, you should leave this part, because the content would self-explain itself. Now it really looks weird with this puenta taken out of nigger's ass.
Like the whole article (99%) was written with lulz in mind (which is fine as I mentioned) and suddenly in the end you seriously go along with:
"Well, you know guyz I was trolling you. Game is very good anyway (though not exactly RPG)".

 

[BelisariuS.F]

Ever noticed how Fallout's items, even without descriptions, are actually memorable?

Not relevant to the review. The review doesn't say anything about memorability of the items, but it says that interface is bad because it's a listbox.

Actually, since you decided to drill this subject, the part about the interface is weak. One could complain about significant things: lack of tab for junk, lack of sorting, lots of unused space, lack of easy access to all interface screens. Instead the review claims that the interface is bad because it's a listbox and doesn't have descriptions with pictures (hmm... maybe that last complain is in itself a proof of how bad the interface is - it is so bad that the reviewers were not able to find the screen that contains, among others, over eighty descriptions with pictures of game characters). And then you have two pictures that compare not inventory from TW1 to inventory from TW2, not character descriptions from TW1 to character descriptions from TW2, but character descriptions from TW1 to inventory from TW2. I mean, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5BMQ-xpTog You can do better than that.

 

[Mangoose]

Uh, the last three paragraphs are still part of the satire.

Edit: Except for the very last one, fine.

 

[felipepepe]

More importantly, what is the point of the last paragraph?

If it really was intended as satire, you should leave this part, because the content would self-explain itself. Now it really looks weird with this puenta taken out of nigger's ass.
Like the whole article (99%) was written with lulz in mind (which is fine as I mentioned) and suddenly in the end you seriously go along with:
"Well, you know guyz I was trolling you. Game is very good anyway (though not exactly RPG)".

VD and VoD were in full Witcher 2 spirit and decided to make the review more simple and welcoming. An ironic text for those who can't get irony.

 

[Black_Willow]

Uh, the last three paragraphs are still part of the satire.

Edit: Except for the very last one, fine.

No, the last line is a satire of Codex hivemind.

 

[mikaelis]

Hmm, actually as I read these last three paragraphs again they may as well be considered the pinnacle of irony and sarcasm.

In which case...



... I was double-trolled

:D

 

[Drakron]

Which language?

Portuguese.

 

[Haba]

Looking forward to the fair and balanced AoD reviews.

 

[BelisariuS.F]

VD and VoD were in full Witcher 2 spirit and decided to make the review more simple and welcoming. An ironic text for those who can't get irony.

No, the last line is a satire of Codex hivemind.

Hmm, actually as I read these last three paragraphs again they may as well be considered the pinnacle of irony and sarcasm.

In which case...



... I was double-trolled

:D

Nice ideas for a cop out.

 

[Elwro]

The UI is bad on many levels. Why on Earth split the information about monsters between the journal entries and the "character knowledge" entries? I only discovered the latter after some time.

 

[Mangoose]

THe humor wasn't streamlined enough for me.

 

[BelisariuS.F]

THe humor wasn't streamlined enough for me.

useless non-review.

 

[mikaelis]

Nice ideas for a cop out.

Whoa bro, I was merely hinted that last three paragraphs could indeed be a vile irony.
I stand my ground (and never denied so) that the article as a review is shit (Because the game is quite good regardless of the genre which is absolutely not reflected in the 99% of the review content).

As a satire it can be considered funny. Especially that it really bites on the bullshit that CDRed were shitting out of their ass regarding real C&C, numerous pathways leading to completely different endings etc.

 

[thesheeep]

Good "review"

The conclusion, however, seems rather honest. So.. a good game which might or might not be called an RPG and has sucky QTE. Okay...

 

[Darth Roxor]

Hohoho, I see excellent breeding grounds for butthurt here.

 

[Mrowak]

Hohoho, I see excellent breeding grounds for butthurt here.

Indeed. That was the whole point of the "review" after all.

 

[Vault Dweller]

More importantly, what is the point of the last paragraph?

If it really was intended as satire, you should leave this part, because the content would self-explain itself. Now it really looks weird with this puenta taken out of nigger's ass.
Like the whole article (99%) was written with lulz in mind (which is fine as I mentioned) and suddenly in the end you seriously go along with:
"Well, you know guyz I was trolling you. Game is very good anyway (though not exactly RPG)".

VD and VoD were in full Witcher 2 spirit and decided to make the review more simple and welcoming. An ironic text for those who can't get irony.

Pretty much. The review is consistent. The reaction to the paragraph in question is delightfully lulzy though.

VentilatorOfDoom, are you really this cynical in real life? I mean, goddamit, here I was hoping for a quality, unbiased review, like we got on numerous occassions.

What makes this review biased?

One more thing - your conclusion. This was actually the most well-written part of the whole review. But, why on earth was it so inconsistent with the rest of the content?

In what ways? The review praised the game, didn't it?

I stand my ground (and never denied so) that the article as a review is shit (Because the game is quite good regardless of the genre which is absolutely not reflected in the 99% of the review content).

So what did we forget to cover?

 

[MicoSelva]

Great review. Funny and true at the same time. Good job.

 

[Gragt]

It's alphaturd gate all over again. And I'm still laughing.

 

[Black_Willow]

It's alphaturd gate all over again. And I'm still laughing.

But this time VD isn't one of the outraged.

 

[CrunchyHemorrhoids]

Brilliant! A perfect parody of that german humor you so often never hear about and an accountant's detailed description of the trees for the forest.

Good for what it is, would watch again.

 

[CrimsonAngel]

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH GODDAMN BATMAN!!!

 

[Gragt]

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH GODDAMN BATMAN!!!

Except maybe for an RPG …

Bugger this, there is nothing wrong with THE GODDAMN BATMAN!