Return To Monkey Island - MI2 sequel from Ron Gilbert

[Ludwig von Eisenthal]

Shiieeet! I didn't know that the dark magic of pixelization is considered pixel art. I can now follow my dream to be a pixel artist, be afraid Ferrari!

If you gild a piece of shit it may shine in the sunlight but it's still a piece of shit unterneath. You still see it and you smell it. The style of this game is in itself broken beyond redemption or repair. Patching a pixelating filter on top of it doesn't change anything, still looks abominable.

 

[Darkozric]

I pushed the fucking button, since I found my review helpful.

 

[EruDaan]

Whoever thinks this game is good will love and wank furiously to: Wokanda Forever, Black Wi(n)dow, Doctor Strange II: Universal Mudshit, Falcon and Winter Soldier, Prey,

- all females are either awesome and/or badass at what they do no matter their character

- "powerful" females in positions of power fucking everywhere #likeinreallife

- females look like shit and/or like men (Pirate with an beard shadow and a womens voice / the Locksmith)

- the game spits on and mocks the previous games and their characters

- males are, in most cases, one sided baffoons or whiny losers

- graphics are shit

- animations are shit - talking characters look like their head is pulsating as if some Lovecraftian beast is trying to free itself from that characters skull

- Guybrush's dick nose, 'nuff said.

- if Guybrush wants to help other characters, especiallay females, even Elaine, they react condescending / patronizing at best, patting him on the head, saying "cute, now run along and let adults do things"

- experimenting with items, locations and stuff is made impossbile by the new "interface"

- coloureds, asians and hispanics everywhere

- there is a "joke" about covid and / or science "denyers", 'nuff said

- Stan is suddenly an white collar criminal

- the list of any woke rainbow shit is endless and I'm not only half through the game (via walkthrough on youtube, no way I'm paying for and playing this abomination!)

 

[Zarniwoop]

- males are, in most cases, one sided baffoons or whiny losers

At least one part is true to the spirit of the original

Hard pass until it's bundle time.

 

[Barbarian]

- males are, in most cases, one sided baffoons or whiny losers

At least one part is true to the spirit of the original

Hard pass until it's bundle time.

Yes, not saying this game isn't utter shit, but in the originals Guybrush and other male characters(including LeChuck) were bumbling retards while characters such as Elaine and the voodoo lady were depicted as competent/reasonable.

 

[Kedar]

Whoever thinks this game is good will love and wank furiously to: Wokanda Forever, Black Wi(n)dow, Doctor Strange II: Universal Mudshit, Falcon and Winter Soldier, Prey.

I wank furiously to only some of those, the others only give me a semi-chubby, but I think RtMI is a disappointment.

- males are, in most cases, one sided baffoons or whiny losers

Yes, not saying this game isn't utter shit, but in the originals Guybrush and other male characters(including LeChuck) were bumbling retards while characters such as Elaine and the voodoo lady were depicted as competent/reasonable.

No one noticed back then because people weren't yet conditioned to see every single thing as part of the culture war. If Aliens came out today, it would get the same flak for being woke as every current movie that dares to have a female protagonist - the only reason that movie's universally revered is that it came out in a time when a badass with tits wasn't yet perceived as threatening by manchildren.

 

[Zarniwoop]

Apart from the obvious woketry, the most complained issue with this game seems to be the laughable excuse for "puzzles".

How could Gilbert fall so far so quickly? Thimbleweed Park was not that long ago and it was great.

 

[ADULF HITLOR FAN KLUB]

No wonder the game's art style is crap
One look at the art director face is all it takes to understand the reason!

Until now I have only heard his name and seen his art style,
now I have seen his crazy face and I have nightmares!

Funny how Rex Crowle's teeth are just as crooked as his shitty globohomo art style.

 

[Darkozric]

"Mr. Crowle"


Lyrics

Mr. Crowle, what went wrong with your teeth?
Oh Mr. Crowle, did you talk with a dentist?
Your lifestyle to me seemed so tragic
With the soy of it all
You fooled all the faggots with magic
Yeah, you waited on Disney's call


Mr. Charming, did you think you were based?
Mr. Alarming, in nocturnal rapport
Uncovering things that were sacred
Manifest on this genre
Ah, conceived in the eye of a secret
And they scattered the afterbirth


(Solo)


Mr. Crowle, won't you ride my white dick?
Mr. Crowle, it's symbolic of course
Approaching a game that is classic
I hear the gamers' call
Approaching a time that is drastic
Standing with their backs to the wall



Was it politically correct?

I wanna know what you meant
I wanna know
I wanna know what you meant, yeah!


(Solo)



Pro tip: Listening to Ozzy's song while reading the lyrics increases the ummersium.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0RE230PlX4

 

[negator2vc]

Apart from the obvious woketry, the most complained issue with this game seems to be the laughable excuse for "puzzles".

How could Gilbert fall so far so quickly? Thimbleweed Park was not that long ago and it was great.

Have you finished Thimbleweed Park?
If you have you know that even then the signs where there!
At least that game didn't have crap art

 

[negator2vc]

https://grumpygamer.com/unions

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

Unless Gilbert is joking (I wouldn't put it past him) it looks like RtMI wasn't a big success after all

UPDATE: fixed the success part of my post since it's obvious from his words that RtMI wasn't

 

[ADULF HITLOR FAN KLUB]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

 

[negator2vc]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

And hope that he leave Maniac Mansion alone.

 

[mindx2]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

 

[Rincewind]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

TP was good, enjoyable, well-done, and it looked and sounded good.

 

[Alex]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

TP was good, enjoyable, well-done, and it looked and sounded good.

And then you got to the ending...

 

[negator2vc]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

The reason it did work in the TP case is that until right before the ending TP had actual good adventure game qualities.
Also Gilbert didn't try to antagonize the fan base during the game development.
In fact during it's development he had a very nice blog where he discussed with the fans design choices, technical stuff about the game's engine, etc...

 

[Neuromancer]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

TP was good, enjoyable, well-done, and it looked and sounded good.

And then you got to the ending...

I started the game some time ago and kind of liked it. After playing for a few hours, I got stuck in one place - and then didn't have time to continue the following weeks for work reasons.
Originally, I wanted to resume playing, but after reading about the ending, I guess it is better to leave it like this and keep the good memories.

 

[Alex]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

TP was good, enjoyable, well-done, and it looked and sounded good.

And then you got to the ending...

I started the game some time ago and kind of liked it. After playing for a few hours, I got stuck in one place - and then didn't have time to continue the following weeks for work reasons.
Originally, I wanted to resume playing, but after reading about the ending, I guess it is better to leave it like this and keep the good memories.

Frankly, I would recommend you finish it, Just don't get so invested on it that when the ending does arrive, it pisses you off.

 

[JarlFrank]

"Thimbleweed Park was the first game I ever saw anything from. I am getting something from RtMI but it's small. I've created a lot over the years and only made other people rich."

It sounds like his attempt to cash-in on nostalgia didn't work out as well as expected...

Hopefully Monkey Island can now rest in peace.

Actually, nostalgia did work because Thimbleweed Park did make him some money because it felt like a real throwback adventure game and people bought it. That's what people wanted not whatever that new MI monstrosity was.

When he announced the new Monkey Island, I was interested. I would have purchased it on day one because, despite its shitty ending, I liked Thimbleweed Park and thought it was one of the few Kickstarter games by old guard devs that actually delivered on its promise.

But as soon as the first screenshots of the new MI turned up, my interest evaporated.

Still haven't bought the game. Didn't pirate it either. It's not even on my Steam wishlist.
I completely ignore its existence because I don't want it to taint my memories of the original MI games.

 

[lightbane]

I think one of the most strange things until the release of this game was the zealous defense of this game against all odds. Whenever you critiziced it, you were blasted by the usual -"ist" insults to the point no discussion could be made. Now that the game has been out for a while and the ending has been proven without doubt that is shit and incoherent (or bad and incoherent due trying too many things at once at best), the discussion regarding this game is mostly gone.

 

[Rincewind]

I completely ignore its existence because I don't want it to taint my memories of the original MI games.

I'm like that too, man.

 

[Maxie]

I completely ignore its existence because I don't want it to taint my memories of the original MI games.

I'm like that too, man.

I can see those telltale games on your account

 

[Great Deceiver]

I think one of the most strange things until the release of this game was the zealous defense of this game against all odds. Whenever you critiziced it, you were blasted by the usual -"ist" insults to the point no discussion could be made. Now that the game has been out for a while and the ending has been proven without doubt that is shit and incoherent (or bad and incoherent due trying too many things at once at best), the discussion regarding this game is mostly gone.

There's nothing strange about it - it's standard operating procedure now across all industries, including film. If you criticize #Product on its own merits, you're a racist homophobe and literally Austrian. A few months down the line when #Product is completely forgotten and relegated to the trash heap of history, those responsible just pretend nothing ever happened.

#Product isn't beholden to the profit motive anymore. ESG grants and funny money financing ensures that no one is ever held accountable for anything. The future is bright.

 

[EtcEtcEtc]

I think one of the most strange things until the release of this game was the zealous defense of this game against all odds. Whenever you critiziced it, you were blasted by the usual -"ist" insults to the point no discussion could be made. Now that the game has been out for a while and the ending has been proven without doubt that is shit and incoherent (or bad and incoherent due trying too many things at once at best), the discussion regarding this game is mostly gone.

There's nothing strange about it - it's standard operating procedure now across all industries, including film. If you criticize #Product on its own merits, you're a racist homophobe and literally Austrian. A few months down the line when #Product is completely forgotten and relegated to the trash heap of history, those responsible just pretend nothing ever happened.

#Product isn't beholden to the profit motive anymore. ESG grants and funny money financing ensures that no one is ever held accountable for anything. The future is bright.

What was funny about this one, is how quickly the insults and accusations started flying over the art style.

This wasn't about any of the normal bugbears - criticism wasn't about gender roles, or trannies being in it, or the writing being done by a woman, or that a character was blackwashed, it was literally about the art style - which should have been entirely safe ground to critique - and they still ran the same playbook because they know they can.

I disagree that this is standard operating procedure in all industries right now, it's still a play only run when the criticism revolves around lighting rod topics. I think they intentionally throw in those lightning rods when they have a shit product to galvanize attention - i.e. black hobbits in that shitty LOTR show - but it's still focused on the racial aspects - not criticism of the overall product.

But gaming, being one of the first industries to succumb to the woke infection, is on the cutting edge. What happened with gaming companies and gaming 'journos' spread pretty quickly - so I fully anticipate when Disney puts out some shit film where the criticism is devoid of anything to do with social topics, but just that it looks like shit, they're going to run this play.