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The Elder Scrolls Online

Black

Arcane
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
1,872,969
And yet, every single one of you fuckers signed up for the beta.

Yeah, fuck you, I did too.
Fags here actually signed for the beta?
You know, at least when I played and defended Diablo 3 thought it's going to get better in the end-game and that it's salvageable, but I have no idea what are you doing. You see a train which is bound to cause a massive train-wreck and you hop on, instead of watching from a distance.
 

Data4

Arcane
Joined
Sep 11, 2005
Messages
5,552
Location
Over there.
I like to think of it as riding that train via out of body experience. You get to see it crash without losing your own ass. Or purchase and sub fees. :D
 

Shannow

Waster of Time
Joined
Sep 15, 2006
Messages
6,386
Location
Finnegan's Wake
At least the elves finally aren't ugly, I guess the technology has become good enough to make pretty elves. :smug:

My own reaction:
Wow, CGI has become so good that the characters now look just as shitty as in fanfic cosplay movies...

*shrug*

I'll probably register, just to make Black butthurt.
And I'll name my guild iloveoblivion. It will be glorious.
 

Black

Arcane
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
1,872,969
We'll see whose anus is more disintegrated by the end of the day:pete:
 
Joined
Nov 8, 2007
Messages
6,207
Location
The island of misfit mascots
Firstly, I'll clarify that I have no interest in this, and I certainly never played Skyrim.

Having said that, I suspect Bethseda will learn lessons from Bioware's failure - surely they'd have been watching TOR like a hawk and would be drinking buckets of shadenfrude when it flopped. I actually think this will just be a run of the mill MMORPG, that it will make them a moderate but not massive profit, and it won't be any shitter than most of the mmorpgs out there:
- a mmorpg really isn't a big step from Beth's single player games. It's a much more natural step for them than it was for Bioware;
- they aren't talking about reinventing the genre. As much as I think their games are theme parks, they've demonstrated that they can sell them as open worlds. They don't try to write story-based games, just lots of idiot content. Moreover, in FO3 they were demonstrably better at writing random side-quests than they were at the main plot (e.g. the android quest on that ship town). A mmorpg environment where they're writing largely disconnected content in different zones with no expectation of a coherent main quest might actually suit them better than single player games.
- When Oblivion came out, I thought it was the worst game ever made. At that time I remember posting that Bethesda were essentially the worst thing ever to happen to gaming, and Bioware were mediocre but rarely awful. My opinion has largely been reversed since then. Bethesda continued to simplify the TES franchise with Skyrim from what I've heard, but my experience playing FO3 (again - I don't like the game, but I can give credit where it's due) is that for all their crappiness, I can't deny that Bethesda makes rpgs, and that they have a clear interest in making crpgs. Todd actually seems to be more 'out of his depth' than 'inherently retarded' - he very clearly wants to make modern-day Ultima 7 games, which is a laudable aim, but he's simply not talented enough to pull it off. His games play like a crappy fan-made attempt at a FP Ultima 7 (right down to the embarassing writing), but I can still respect his intent. Bioware, on the other hand, has left rpg-land a long time ago, and seems to make corridor shooters / b-grade action games interspersed by dating sims that read worse than Mills and Boon. I don't buy games from either studio any more, but these days I'd back Bethesda over Bioware easily. If nothing else, Bethesda makes the kind of gameplay and product that you expect in a mmorpg - they just do it badly. Bioware had the moronic aim of trying to sell half-baked single-player gameplay, mixed up with grinding, complete lack of open world and bad romances as a mmorpg - i.e. even if they were good at what they were doing, they simply don't make the right kind of games for a mmorpg environment anymore.
- Fanbase. Bioware has a core fanbase that actively alienates everyone else. Moreover, they even have a 'give me exactly what I want - even if it makes the game so hideous that nobody outside of BSN will play it - or I'm going to have a fucking tantrum' attitude. Bioware just can't win when making a game that opens up those players to the wider audience. It lost its rpg fans long ago, and now they're wedged between making dating sims that most gamers are put off by, or alienating their rabid waifu-obsessed core fans. Bethesda has its share of fanboys, but for the most part they simply don't stir the kind of passion one way or the other compared to Bioware - and for all their LARPING (which they'll happily do whether they're playing a mmorpg or notepad), they still expect a game with the kind of gameplay that is often put in mmorpgs.
- Bethesda doesn't seem to be betting the house on this mmorpg to the same extent as Bioware did with TOR. Bioware hitched their reputation to TOR in a way that's rare even in the gaming industry - it had such a long development time, with such a big budget and such lofty claims that they were always going to fall hard if it flopped. Bethesda seems to be treating their mmorpg no differently to any other product - the hype machine is surprisingly late actually, and they've been very coy with their promotion. I suspect that after TOR's debacle, they're going to be cautious about how much they promise, and leave themselves some leeway if the game fails/
 
Joined
Nov 28, 2011
Messages
6,068
Location
Digger Nick
What have you guys written in this "Why you should pick me for the beta" box to persuade Zenimax and how are you going to look at yourself in the mirror? :smug:

Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."

I chuckled.
 

Shannow

Waster of Time
Joined
Sep 15, 2006
Messages
6,386
Location
Finnegan's Wake
What have you guys written in this "Why you should pick me for the beta" box to persuade Zenimax and how are you going to look at yourself in the mirror? :smug:
"I admire Zenimax' financing of terrorists and arms dealers. I too hate people. And so I wish to help make TESO the best game ever. The better TESO turns out to be the more retards waste their time on it and the more weapons and strife can be expected in the world. Please consider me as a beta tester. I wish to do my part in the destruction of humanity. For a better tomorrow."

Mirrors crack when I look into them. Cunts.
 

DraQ

Arcane
Joined
Oct 24, 2007
Messages
32,828
Location
Chrząszczyżewoszyce, powiat Łękołody
Bethesda has two big problems though:

They can't balance shit or avoid exploits, and they can't code shit that actually works as intended without crapping out in most hilarious ways imaginable.

Both will be a problem in online environment.

Plus, they destroy their own huge strength excessive through lore-rape (one of the main reasons I'd like TESO to fail horribly).

I once said that I would see only one way to pull off successful modern TES MMO. Set players up as minor daedra and make the game take place in the realms of oblivion, with occasional forays into Mundus.
-no need for permadeath
-largely disjoint from established and future lore
-potentially attractive to all kinds of anime-addled teen faggots who insist on engaging in hideously bad interactive fiction on internet forums, where they roleplay excessively epic half demon, half angel half dragon half elves and explore the depths of inanity previously untouched by man.
-Molag Bal's and Sanguine's realms might need to be mature, though.

Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
 

IDtenT

Menace to sobriety!
Patron
Joined
Jan 21, 2012
Messages
14,659
Location
South Africa; My pronouns are: Banal/Shit/Boring
Divinity: Original Sin
Bethesda has two big problems though:

They can't balance shit or avoid exploits, and they can't code shit that actually works as intended without crapping out in most hilarious ways imaginable.

Both will be a problem in online environment.
Bethesda studio itself isn't doing the game. They got some MMO veterans to do the game for them. It's like the different Biowares.

Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
If that's actually true, which I'm not sure about - they have fixed all lore issues instantly. :P However they have then rendered the entire game outside of the canon.
 

DraQ

Arcane
Joined
Oct 24, 2007
Messages
32,828
Location
Chrząszczyżewoszyce, powiat Łękołody
Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
If that's actually true, which I'm not sure about - they have fixed all lore issues instantly. :P However they have then rendered the entire game outside of the canon.
Yeah, making the MMO actually a (bad) fiction-in-fiction is pretty... brilliant... for all the derp contained (my, what a right word) within.
:retarded:

My head is spinning.
 

Sul

Savant
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
Messages
487
Location
brbr?
Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
Lawrance is the guy responsible for the lore in TESO. Behold some of his work:
Bosmer don't live in trees and their cannibalism was tonned down, Altmer don't live in crystal houses and they are governed by the Loremaster's mary-sue waifu that was some kind of pirate toddler in the past and loves multiculti now, Cyrodiil as a jungle was a transcription error (yes, a retcon of a retcon), moon sugar is just a sweet, elves are just humans with pointy ears, the presence of Vivec is completely ignored. The list goes on but that's all I can remember from my head right now.
Apparently the Zenimax Online team wanted Kirkbride to do the work but Zenimax wanted something more akin to LotR so they could get everyone fresh out The Hobbit trilogy. Truly disgusting.
 

Data4

Arcane
Joined
Sep 11, 2005
Messages
5,552
Location
Over there.
What!? No Kirkbride? Fuck them. If I get picked for the beta, I'll only use it to stand in the middle of Mournhold (City of light! City of Magic!) and /yell how much they suck.
 

abnaxus

Arcane
Patron
Joined
Dec 31, 2010
Messages
10,880
Location
Fiernes
Figures Dunmer alliance with Argonians is due to womyn. Sotha Sil and Vivec would never want anything to do with that.
 

DraQ

Arcane
Joined
Oct 24, 2007
Messages
32,828
Location
Chrząszczyżewoszyce, powiat Łękołody
Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
Lawrance is the guy responsible for the lore in TESO. Behold some of his work:
Bosmer don't live in trees and their cannibalism was tonned down, Altmer don't live in crystal houses and they are governed by the Loremaster's mary-sue waifu that was some kind of pirate toddler in the past and loves multiculti now, Cyrodiil as a jungle was a transcription error (yes, a retcon of a retcon), moon sugar is just a sweet, elves are just humans with pointy ears, the presence of Vivec is completely ignored. The list goes on but that's all I can remember from my head right now.
Apparently the Zenimax Online team wanted Kirkbride to do the work but Zenimax wanted something more akin to LotR so they could get everyone fresh out The Hobbit trilogy. Truly disgusting.

I hate. I hate so very much.
:x
I so do hope it bombs worse than fucking tortanic.
 

Black

Arcane
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
1,872,969
Cyrodiil as a jungle was a transcription error
They don't even pretend to not give a fuck.
And what's the best is that this mmo is what they're calling "the real tes" while bethesda games were just "cool stories and legends". So the mmo will be the new tes canon.
 

Kem0sabe

Arcane
Joined
Mar 7, 2011
Messages
13,173
Location
Azores Islands
TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."

Where is this shit from? not sure if serious... or is an elaborate attempt to engage in kinky fuckery with the interweb.
 

Sul

Savant
Joined
Nov 25, 2011
Messages
487
Location
brbr?
Also,

TES Online allows the player to live the events of The Alliance War saga, an ongoing series of historical fiction novels written in the Fourth Era and set in the Second Era of Tamriel. Though extremely popular among the commoners, scholars and priests across Tamriel have criticized it for its unbelievable characters, including an Altmer queen of only 28 years, and blatant historical and mythological inaccuracies. The Elder Council condemns its portrayal of the Imperial government as complicit in a Daedric invasion of Tamriel, and cults of Molag Bal in four provinces have released statements distancing themselves from the author, who goes simply by the name of "Loremaster Lawrence."
Wait what.
Lawrance is the guy responsible for the lore in TESO. Behold some of his work:
Bosmer don't live in trees and their cannibalism was tonned down, Altmer don't live in crystal houses and they are governed by the Loremaster's mary-sue waifu that was some kind of pirate toddler in the past and loves multiculti now, Cyrodiil as a jungle was a transcription error (yes, a retcon of a retcon), moon sugar is just a sweet, elves are just humans with pointy ears, the presence of Vivec is completely ignored. The list goes on but that's all I can remember from my head right now.
Apparently the Zenimax Online team wanted Kirkbride to do the work but Zenimax wanted something more akin to LotR so they could get everyone fresh out The Hobbit trilogy. Truly disgusting.

I hate. I hate so very much.
:x
I so do hope it bombs worse than fucking tortanic.
It's a shame really, mostly because the guys from Zenimax Online seems to be real bros. Fuck, during the live interview on the last E3 one of the devs even answered "from where the Redguards came and are they related with the rest of the humans?" correctly without even flinching. If there's someone we need to hate is Lawrance and Lawrence alone. Bethesda at least consulted Kirkbride's work on the lore (ability to implement it aside).
 

Shadenuat

Arcane
Joined
Dec 9, 2011
Messages
11,977
Location
Russia
Three colors trying to conquer green color to make it their own color. Amazing level of political complexity and drama in the trailer indeed.

At least there's Mannimarco and Almalexia...
 

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