The Mass Effect 3/BioWare Thread

[Angthoron]

Well fuck, this certainly has been an entertaining couple of months. The buildup to ME3, the lulz in the game itself, and the self-destruction of Bioware's fanbase.

One actual point of interest in that thread (though this continues to be off topic) outside of the entertainment factor is

We will try to bring some closure to Hawke's story but likely not in a playable form. Originally we had planned to do an expansion pack but had to stop to focus on what we are working on now.​

Guess that means they've entirely given up on DAII.

I could be wrong here (I haven't played DA2), but wasn't the entire point of DA2 to build up the story of Hawke for DA3? I mean, I vaguely remember Bioware saying your save would carry over to DA3, at the very least. Could this be a sign that DA3 won't be made? With how weak DA2 performed, I could easily see EA deciding to scrap the franchise. And now that ME3 is out performing poorly and generating all this anger, where does that leave Bioware in EA's eyes?

Too early to scrape either franchise at this point, I think. They'll try to milk them some more, maybe not ME so much, but there are still people out there hoping that DA3 will be about the warden and not the hawke, at least according to stuff frequently quoted in BTE.

 

[Aeschylus]

I could be wrong here (I haven't played DA2), but wasn't the entire point of DA2 to build up the story of Hawke for DA3? I mean, I vaguely remember Bioware saying your save would carry over to DA3, at the very least. Could this be a sign that DA3 won't be made? With how weak DA2 performed, I could easily see EA deciding to scrap the franchise. And now that ME3 is out performing poorly and generating all this anger, where does that leave Bioware in EA's eyes?

Nope, they've stated outright that every major entry in the series will have a different protagonist. The save will probably carry over, not that it really matters since you had no influence on anything in DA2.

 

[LoPan]

I don't recall ever seeing food in Mass Effect 1. Does food ever appear in any of these games? Is there some piece of trivia in the lore-log about how everyone is fed by stealth injections?

what about language?

I know it's cheesy, but I'd enjoy it if Sheps would walk in on that scene, would make those crewmates seem like they are actual living beings.

you put too much faith in biowaste

I thought I read somewhere here that they solved the language difference by use of a universal translator, because I detect no errors in my sentence structure or grammar.

I don't recall ever seeing food in Mass Effect 1. Does food ever appear in any of these games? Is there some piece of trivia in the lore-log about how everyone is fed by stealth injections?

I know it's cheesy, but I'd enjoy it if Sheps would walk in on that scene, would make those crewmates seem like they are actual living beings.

There's a quest in ME2 where you have to get the ship's cook better ingredients, because the crew complains that his food tastes like ass. And there is a ship mess hall on Normandy Mk.2.

But does it visibly hold food? More importantly, is there an eating animation?

 

[GarfunkeL]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity. Just like shitting or bathing.

 

[sgc_meltdown]

But does it visibly hold food? More importantly, is there an eating animation?

For the entire game the crew members do nothing but sit at completely bare dining tables without plates and run their conversation loops while the cook stands in a kitchenware area filled with sleek opaque featureless cupboards and drawers and no visible signs of culinary activity. If it helps I think there was a sink and metal cutting board.

READY FOR ACTION

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity

Not as epic as room decorating and fish feeding, and perhaps trash compacting if you have the money to spare

 

[Kashrlyyk]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity. Just like shitting or bathing.

Also NOT EPIC: Undressing to fuck each other. Listen up "Witcher 2".

 

[Aeschylus]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity. Just like shitting or bathing.

Also NOT EPIC: Undressing to fuck each other. Listen up "Witcher 2".

Everybody knows that granny panties are an essential ingredient for any erotic encounter.

 

[evdk]

But does it visibly hold food? More importantly, is there an eating animation?

IIRC no, there's no food nor eating animation.

 

[LoPan]

A shame, my imagination has estimated that it would be pretty darn funny.

 

[WhiskeyWolf]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity. Just like shitting or bathing.

Also NOT EPIC: Undressing to fuck each other. Listen up "Witcher 2".

You mean using magic to make your clothes disappear is not EPIC? Fuck you.

 

[LoPan]

I don't know why I didn't notice it before, but Vega rips that beer out so hard the other one falls out and into a phallic symbol (which is what is actually freaking out the timid but perceptive scientist Liara), both Garrus and Tali are looking at it, and no one is looking at Mordin. Oh dear, what was once a fishy image is now rather depressing.

 

[Xor]

But does it visibly hold food? More importantly, is there an eating animation?

IIRC no, there's no food nor eating animation.

They couldn't even fit the animation for holstering your weapon in ME3. I doubt there would be room for an eating animation.

 

[Toffeli]

They don't call 'em biowhores without reason.
http://social.bioware.com/forum/1/topic/355/index/10329091/1

I have always been a huge supporter in BUYING games from the publisher so that Devs get money for their work. However my boyfriend, honestly, does not support purchasing games. I fought tooth and nail to get him to actually pay money for Mass Effect 3 AND pre order it. I had so much faith that the game would be great that this would finally get him to start buying games.

I did things, as a girlfriend does to her boyfriend. THINGS! Things.

My sweet SO has now finally finished the game. He called me up and said "Thanks for getting me to buy a 60 dollar paper weight, baby. I have no reason to ever play this game again. I don't understand the endings. What happened? Is this just a cliffhanger? The end said there was downloadable content, is that were i get the end?"

Yes, he actually asked me if there was an actual end to the game in the downloadable content, because the enidngs are so bad he thinks that the endings are not even endings.

 

[Angthoron]

They don't call 'em biowhores without reason.
http://social.bioware.com/forum/1/topic/355/index/10329091/1

I have always been a huge supporter in BUYING games from the publisher so that Devs get money for their work. However my boyfriend, honestly, does not support purchasing games. I fought tooth and nail to get him to actually pay money for Mass Effect 3 AND pre order it. I had so much faith that the game would be great that this would finally get him to start buying games.

I did things, as a girlfriend does to her boyfriend. THINGS! Things.

My sweet SO has now finally finished the game. He called me up and said "Thanks for getting me to buy a 60 dollar paper weight, baby. I have no reason to ever play this game again. I don't understand the endings. What happened? Is this just a cliffhanger? The end said there was downloadable content, is that were i get the end?"

Yes, he actually asked me if there was an actual end to the game in the downloadable content, because the enidngs are so bad he thinks that the endings are not even endings.

THINGS!

 

[Cowboy Moment]

From the same thread:

BSN is a scary, scary place sometimes.

 

[Oriebam]

If your boyfriend wants you to do "things" as a payment for good behaviour (like paying for stuff like an adult) instead of treating "things" as something that should be a mutually enjoyable experience, I suggest you get a better boyfriend. He sounds like a selfish individual.

Ah "white knighting" behavior. Most typical on internet. Easy to overcome fear of proximity of women, behave in manner consistent with perceptions of chivalry. Results in euphoric feeling of masculinity. Mild anxiety in desperation of notice. Thinks white knight will gain approval and appreciation from female in question.

Often practiced by weaker or lonelier members of pack. Interesting behavior. Unique to humans.

Prefer dolphins. Nice caves.


-----------------------
Hm, differences between white knights and feminists are malleable. Absence of data to indicate genuine difference between two.

Requires more research.

quality LARPing or not?

 

[Oesophagus]

I don't know why I didn't notice it before, but Vega rips that beer out so hard the other one falls out and into a phallic symbol (which is what is actually freaking out the timid but perceptive scientist Liara), both Garrus and Tali are looking at it, and no one is looking at Mordin. Oh dear, what was once a fishy image is now rather depressing.

Garrus is eating watermelon. I always thought there was something black about him

 

[Hamster]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity.

George Martin disagrees.

 

[ScottishMartialArts]

Bioware devs stated back before BG2 that they are in the business of making epic games and eating is not an epic activity.

George Martin disagrees.

Fuck, Homer disagrees. Look how often the heroes of Homeric epic sit down and have a meal and drink wine.

Bioware fails at epic.

 

[Andyman Messiah]

Just want to let you know that I'm writing a review.

Also: Dragon Age 2, everything is forgiven.

 

[evdk]

Also: Dragon Age 2, everything is forgiven.

 

[Vaarna_Aarne]

If your boyfriend wants you to do "things" as a payment for good behaviour (like paying for stuff like an adult) instead of treating "things" as something that should be a mutually enjoyable experience, I suggest you get a better boyfriend. He sounds like a selfish individual.

Ah "white knighting" behavior. Most typical on internet. Easy to overcome fear of proximity of women, behave in manner consistent with perceptions of chivalry. Results in euphoric feeling of masculinity. Mild anxiety in desperation of notice. Thinks white knight will gain approval and appreciation from female in question.

Often practiced by weaker or lonelier members of pack. Interesting behavior. Unique to humans.

Prefer dolphins. Nice caves.


-----------------------
Hm, differences between white knights and feminists are malleable. Absence of data to indicate genuine difference between two.

Requires more research.

quality LARPing or not?

You know, that reads EXACTLY like a Rorschach's journal.

 

[sgc_meltdown]

It makes sense once you realise Andyman hates Mass Effect 3 so much that he's taking old hate reserves from Dragon Age 2.

You know, that reads EXACTLY like a Rorschach's journal.

This galaxy is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The relay lanes are extended gutters and the wormholes are full of blood and when the spacetime finally scabs over, all the aliens will drown.

---

Give me smallest digit on alien's limb. I'll produce information. Omnitool unnecessary.

---

Heard a joke once:
Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel.

Says he feels all alone in a threatening universe where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain.

Doctor says "Treatment is simple. Brave commander Shepard is in colony tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up."

Man bursts into tears. Says:

"But, doctor...I am Shepard."

 

[Oriebam]

Oh that makes me angry. She's the one whoring herself, why doesn't she buy the game? He can't help it she is frigid and denies him sex and he has to go to tranny hookers to get his needs met with blowjobs, which he only goes to because trannies don't count as cheating.

Why can't she just love him like she used to when they first got married? Sure he's put on a couple pounds but he had to quit the band and the motocross circuit to get a job so they could buy a house together. He eats just the same as he always did. And let's be honest that T&A aint what it used to be and she has put on some wight herself. The girls at the office still seem interested enough in him though.

there was a much more appropriate pixelated zoomed in picture but it was offline

 

[racofer]

That guy just wanted to pop some moles, but then he took an arrow to the knee.