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[Ulminati]

"Well caidin...Can I call you caidin? Well, anyway, I was rocking out with my bros, right. Oh, btw, Ciaphas Cain is alive and well. Anyway, as I said, i was rocking out with my bros and then some callidus assassin WHICH I KNOW YOU SENT YOU BITCH tried to off me. So I whacked her. What could I do? Actually some black dude whacked her. Probably raped her, too. But who cares. Anyway, this black dude gives me a ring, right? So I got a mild case of plot stupidity and slipped it on. Turns out the ring contains the souls of millions of not-so-dead necrontyr, beats me why. Not sure what they want, yet, but i gibbed some foo's and ate their brains. I was doing a kindness, i mean, let's face it Caidin, grimdark is a shitty place to live. Maybe now they can rock out with Slaanesh or whatever.

Also did I mention this black dude was a c'tan? Oh yeah, deceiver. P. cool guy, I guess, apart from the cannibal ring he gave me. He wants me to help him...do some vague stuff, something to do with the LSD star that's been going around. Also, Tzeentch recruited me. Can't say I like him much, but that bum deceiver has been sitting on his ass doing fuck all while I have to deal with this civil war. Oh, and this civil war? Let's say a genestealer tried to kill me before it started. funnily enough, he was one of the malfian top brass. What was my point? Oh yeah. I'm in deep shit, Caidin. Real deep shit. So I figure, it's either make or break it right now, and you're a swell guy. Also I gave them mutants their freedom but hey, they're just mutants, it's not like they're some horrible catastrophe waiting to happen. Anyway, I need the men, right?

Then There's this weird dude Eliphas wandering around doing shit, I gotta stop him...Well, I think I had to, but now that i'm tzeentch's buddy maybe I'm supposed to help him. I dunno. Tzeentch claims Deceiver wants to make some kind of powergrab at godhood, total bollocks if you ask me, the only true god is the emperor may he stay dead for ten thousand years. Oh shit, did I just said that? Well, he was an awfully overbearing old bugger. Anyway, Deceiver claims Tzeentch's gonna put Magnus the Red on the throne if we don't stop him. Y'know Magnus? Tall guy...red skin. Only one eye. Also a daemon. So what the fuck, right? I can't figure this shit out by myself. Besides, the cannibal ring i'm wearing speaks that there's some kind of dragon or wahtever going to terra and intent on skullfucking us all. So yeah."

That would be Marius' dialogue if he was dosed with lots of lucid water.

this has no authenticity whatsoever but I felt like letting of some steam so there you have it, cutesy grimdark.

This. This is my vote.

 

[lightbane]

*reads root post*



Unless we want our character to say that and suffer an instant death I say we should choose "Stability for the sector".

EDIT: Oh, and don't summon Mr. D.

 

[DwarvenFood]

Accuse the Tyrantine Cabal of heresy

And still against voting for summoning the Deceiver.

 

[Jaedar]

Feed

We need more choices. Biggus and Goreman may very well turn on us, as we are hardly innocent. That leaves Cain and Tzeentch, and they are both too unpredictable to entrust them with our lives like this.

Still, not sure I agree with letting the necrontyr assume control but the mind control will be useful either way.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Right, here are our options that I think we should not take:

Biggus is out of the question. He's a librarian, which means he can detect our new-found powers, get suspicions, and even turn on us, given his angry marine origins.

Goreman I think should also not be considered. He's a lawful neutral guy, which means he'll most likely try to prove JUSTICE!!111 above all. And the little problem here is that justice is not quite on our side in this one.

Tzeentch's Agent - too unpredictable. Plus, he'd stink of Chaos all over the place, and stinking of Chaos in a place full of Inquisitors is a bad thing.

Necrontyr - It seems like the most 'reliable' option, that is 100% sure not to turn on us during the trial, but the idea of a xeno taking total control over our body doesn't strike me as a good one. Who says he'll be willing to give it up later, too?

I propose the following course of actions: we take Cain. He seems like a largely reliable bro, plus 'HERO OF THE IMPERIUM' might give us some credit. And since some Inquisition guys don't seem to like him much, we should feed beforehand and use the dominate mind power to tip some scales in our favour, and make them think that he's the brosiest bro of them all.

So my choice is: (nvm, flip-flopped a couple of posts below)

 

[Luigi]

Well, all of our human attorneys suck because they are human and probably zealous! We are a mutant and heretic and a xeno to boot...

Tzeentch's agent on the other hand is 100% safe bet. It doesnt suit Chaos to approach you and tell you not to go the palace. Then you do and manage to talk yourself into a court. Chaos didnt want you to be there in the first place. And if The Fateweaver grants you an audience, they prolly send someone fucking good. And human too. Cant imagine a Chaos Sorcerer in court So it will be someone corrupted but influential - more info for us.

Dont feed.
I dont like this "I take you over" business at all. And we are powerful enough as it is.

 

[Crooked Bee]

AA

Let's count on the surprise factor.

 

[Jaedar]

Tzeentch's agent on the other hand is 100% safe bet. It doesnt suit Chaos to approach you and tell you not to go the palace. Then you do and manage to talk yourself into a court. Chaos didnt want you to be there in the first place. And if The Fateweaver grants you an audience, they prolly send someone fucking good. And human too. Cant imagine a Chaos Sorcerer in court So it will be someone corrupted but influential - more info for us.

I don't know about this. Tzeentch has little reason to trust us, after all we are traitors twice over. Both to the Imperium and to Deceiver. Given the opportunity he may very well seek to replace us with someone he can trust more.

I dont like this "I take you over" business at all. And we are powerful enough as it is.

You can never have enough power.

 

[Yaar Podshipnik]

Stay far away from chaos. We are too tainted already

Whenever I read Bigus I think Dickus so no for him. Can't concentrate with that dude in the room.

I think that Goreman will be sensible enough to burn the heretic (that is Marius), kill the mutant (once again Hax) and purge the unclean (surprise, once again our favorite sector lord). So no on him.

That leaves Ciaphas. Not the perfect choice but hopefully better than the others.

Also, feed, but don't try to represent yourself even if you become the smartest dude in whole sector once the necrotyr get into your brain. Do discuss their advice with hero of the imperium though.

in short Ciaphas + Feed

 

[Jaedar]

Voting Necrontyr

I do not trust any of the humans or Tzeentch.

 

[Darth Roxor]

Okay, after thinking a little, I shall flip flop to...

NECRONTYR!!!1111 + FEED!!!1111

After all, the Necrontyr is still the most reliable, total control or not.

Because, let's face it, what guarantee do we have that Cain, the sneaky bastard that he is, didn't follow us to our pet dungeon on some occasion, and didn't find his daemonhost girlfriend? I don't think he'd like that. I also don't think he'd like tentacles bursting out of us, devouring xenos and Ultramarines Librarians.

He *is* the hero of the Imperium, after all. That's probably where his loyalty ultimately lies, not in a mutant xeno heretic.

 

[Brotherman Bill]

DB

It makes no sense for Tzeentch to turn on us now, he even advised us against going into the situation and approached us for flip-floppan. Since we'll get aided by Tzeentch, there's no reason to give more power to the already to powerful necrontyr. These guys are absolute bastards remember.

 

[taplonaplo]

Since Tzeentch's supposedly contols the Cabal i assume it would be one of them representing us which sounds like the most reliable bet, and even if not i don't see how this could get us into even deeper shit, so i vote on Tzeentch's agent.

Also feeding for the lulz and coz it seems to be the only reliable source of information around.

 

[Chaotic Lulz3r]

The little fact that we aren't exactly innocent pretty much rules out Biggus and Goreman. And I think that letting the Necrontyr go all "assuming direct control" on us is massively retarded.

So that leaves Cain and a chaos pet. I'm loathe to trust Hax' life on an entity of unknown origins and highly dubious motives, so I'll go with Cain.

Feeding sounds like a good idea, but root has only pointed out the upside, that we'll be able to mind trick the jury. Is there no downside, like maybe an even more increased chance that an Inquisitor will notice that something is wrong with us?

Until that question is answered, I vote do not feed.

 

[Azael]

If we're going to go retard, we might as well go full retard. I'd say that we take Fateweaver up on his offer and hope that we don't end up with someone obviously tainted speaking for our, pretty obviously tainted, case.

Also, feed.

 

[grotsnik]

I say Cain. We need some Zapp Brannigan-esque court shenanigans. The confusion of his turning up to defend us will help to keep the Inquisitors off-guard for when we bring out our trump card...feeding.

Excellent.

 

[Reject_666_6]

Well now that Caidin is out as a direct ally, the only entity we have left is the Halo device. So, I'll go with that.

NECRONTYR!!!1111 + FEED!!!1111

 

[lightbane]

Seeing our choices, I conclude that none of these are good enough for us, only the descendant of this guy can save us:

Unfortunately, since I'm pretty much sure that's not an option, I vote for Cain, because he's the Hero of the Imperium.

Also, feed, because the Necrontyr may give us a hint of two.

 

[ComradeCommissar]

Gonna go with Fateweaver

And FEED

 

[oscar]

Very tempting. The Necrotyr has vast experience (though I hold some doubt about his experience with the Imperium and it's customs) but this should be right up Tzeentch's alley and Cain has popularity.

For now I vote feed and unleash the Device. I'm not certain Cain will be enough to win and Chaos is Chaos.

 

[Jick Magger]

Gonna go with Ciapias Cain, HERO OF THE IMPERIUM!

Also, lets feed.

 

[treave]

Tzeentch and feed.

If anything, Tzeentch should like double crossers and backstabbers and people who try to play layers and layers of plots within plots.

It'd amuse him to work with someone so obviously working closely with the Necrontyr, and it'd be a challenge of sorts to get Hax out of this trouble.

 

[Chef_Hathaway]

AA

 

[Occasionally Fatal]

NECRONTYR
DON'T FEED

What could possibly go wrong.

 

[Yaar Podshipnik]

CADIAN WALTZ

Awesome. Someone with talent should draw this battle.