Let's talk about Lacrymas' homebrew fantasy setting where paladins are eunuchs

[fantadomat]

Lacrymas

I'm still waiting for that one-shot you promised

Suicide won't solve anything.

The Clintons would disagree with you.

 

[Lacrymas]

Lacrymas

I'm still waiting for that one-shot you promised

We still need another person. We are 4 atm, but I'd like for the players to be 4.

 

[Cael]

Lacrymas

I'm still waiting for that one-shot you promised

We still need another person. We are 4 atm, but I'd like for the players to be 4.

*picks up barge pole*



Nah.

*puts barge pole away*

 

[Reinhardt]

Playing Another Eden right now and they have theocracy where everyone is miserable too.
Criminals exiled to barren continent were doomed, but then Savior descended and gave the land blessing so they could survive. Their descendants formed church. But then Savior left and with each year blessed land is shrinking so it's impossible to support population. Church still support as much people as it can but it's not enough. So slums are growing on abandoned land, but not usual slums. It's people who WILLINGLY leave small patch of still blessed land and accept only bare minimum from church, so the church can use these limited resources to constantly form expeditions of priests heading outside to find a solutuion.

 

[Storyfag]

Playing Another Eden right now and they have theocracy where everyone is miserable too.
Criminals exiled to barren continent were doomed, but then Savior descended and gave the land blessing so they could survive. Their descendants formed church. But then Savior left and with each year blessed land is shrinking so it's impossible to support population. Church still support as much people as it can but it's not enough. So slums are growing on abandoned land, but not usual slums. It's people who WILLINGLY leave small patch of still blessed land and accept only bare minimum from church, so the church can use these limited resources to constantly form expeditions of priests heading outside to find a solutuion.

This is all fine, but the important question is: do they record every single pregnancy, castrate their paladins, and allow their women to join enemy tribes as their only means of reproduction?

 

[Reinhardt]

Playing Another Eden right now and they have theocracy where everyone is miserable too.
Criminals exiled to barren continent were doomed, but then Savior descended and gave the land blessing so they could survive. Their descendants formed church. But then Savior left and with each year blessed land is shrinking so it's impossible to support population. Church still support as much people as it can but it's not enough. So slums are growing on abandoned land, but not usual slums. It's people who WILLINGLY leave small patch of still blessed land and accept only bare minimum from church, so the church can use these limited resources to constantly form expeditions of priests heading outside to find a solutuion.

This is all fine, but the important question is: do they record every single pregnancy and castrate their paladins?

It is a mystary. But they have warpriests battling crystal tyrannosauruses.

Well, they have inqusition. Like our local friendly inqusitor gurl said "It's not heresy if you interpreting scriptures yourself, it only becomes heresy if you admit it's heresy." "But why anyone would admit it?" "We know few tricks."

 

[Lacrymas]

Playing Another Eden right now and they have theocracy where everyone is miserable too.
Criminals exiled to barren continent were doomed, but then Savior descended and gave the land blessing so they could survive. Their descendants formed church. But then Savior left and with each year blessed land is shrinking so it's impossible to support population. Church still support as much people as it can but it's not enough. So slums are growing on abandoned land, but not usual slums. It's people who WILLINGLY leave small patch of still blessed land and accept only bare minimum from church, so the church can use these limited resources to constantly form expeditions of priests heading outside to find a solutuion.

The fact the savior appeared only to criminals is very interesting and I'm going to steal that.

allow their women to join enemy tribes as their only means of reproduction?

???

They don't allow that.

 

[Storyfag]

allow their women to join enemy tribes as their only means of reproduction?

???

They don't allow that.

But you said so yourself.

 

[Lacrymas]

allow their women to join enemy tribes as their only means of reproduction?

???

They don't allow that.

But you said so yourself.

Where? I said that women can choose to go to the orcs of their own volition and they will be treated like princesses there (as opposed to little better than dirt in empire lands) in exchange for bearing orc babies, but that doesn't mean the church allows this. They obviously strictly forbid it, and not only the church, basically the entire society doesn't want their women to go to their enemies. However, not many women are going to want this or have the possibility to choose this anyway.

 

[NJClaw]

Where? I said that women can choose to go to the orcs of their own volition and they will be treated like princesses there (as opposed to little better than dirt in empire lands) in exchange for bearing orc babies, but that doesn't mean the church allows this. They obviously strictly forbid it, and not only the church, basically the entire society doesn't want their women to go to their enemies. However, not many women are going to want this or have the possibility to choose this anyway.

Is your setting based on the "all women are queens/if she breathes she's a thot" meme?

 

[Lacrymas]

Is your setting based on the "all women are queens/if she breathes she's a thot" meme?

Women were a mistake.*


* this is obviously a joke. Maybe. You never know.

 

[Storyfag]

Is your setting based on the "all women are queens/if she breathes she's a thot" meme?

Women were a mistake.*


* this is obviously a joke. Maybe. You never know.

Oh but we do know. You are ghey.

 

[Immortal]

That is very weird, please clarify your reasons behind that.

If they break that vow and someone finds out, they get castrated. I figured they should get something special, i.e. Lay on Hands is the only character-based healing, in order to "justify" the immense requirements.

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?



(if you know what I mean...)

 

[Cael]

That is very weird, please clarify your reasons behind that.

If they break that vow and someone finds out, they get castrated. I figured they should get something special, i.e. Lay on Hands is the only character-based healing, in order to "justify" the immense requirements.

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?



(if you know what I mean...)

I refer you to the thread title...

Spoiler

snip snip

 

[Lacrymas]

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?



(if you know what I mean...)

I'm pretty sure masturbation is allowed during irl celibacy, so I don't think it's forbidden. It's probably frowned upon, but who cares.

 

[Immortal]

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?



(if you know what I mean...)

I'm pretty sure masturbation is allowed during irl celibacy, so I don't think it's forbidden. It's probably frowned upon, but who cares.

You don't know? What if one of your players want's to jerk off..? We need a DM ruling on this now.
What kind of world building is this?

 

[Lacrymas]

Has anyone on your table ever wanted their character to jerk off?

 

[Storyfag]

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?



(if you know what I mean...)

I'm pretty sure masturbation is allowed during irl celibacy, so I don't think it's forbidden. It's probably frowned upon, but who cares.

I'm pretty sure there are different versions of irl celibacy. You would do well to mention which one you are drawing from.

Has anyone on your table ever wanted their character to jerk off?

*ekhem* magical realm *ekhem*

 

[Cael]

Has anyone on your table ever wanted their character to jerk off?

Never had a setting so focused on controlling the sexual lives of its inhabitants, so it is a fair question to ask when it comes to yours.

 

[Immortal]

Has anyone on your table ever wanted their character to jerk off?

th-th-that's not normal during dnd..? *ahem* ..

 

[Reinhardt]

The fact the savior appeared only to criminals is very interesting and I'm going to steal that.

Nice touch is that Original Sin is quite literal. Every single church person is direct descendant of criminals and they remember it.

 

[MartinK]

Women were a mistake.*


* this is obviously a joke. Maybe. You never know.

True. Adam’s first wife was Lilith, but Adam wasn’t man enough tp handle her and thus after she ran away with a real man (Satan), God gave Adam downgraded version.

 

[NJClaw]

It's finally happening, guys. And it's already getting PREEETTY WILD:

 

[Larianshill]

It's a shame Victor isn't a part of this.

 

[Lacrymas]

I'm not ready for his glorious English entering my earballs.