Let's talk about Lacrymas' homebrew fantasy setting where paladins are eunuchs

[Cryomancer]

> Barbarians are woman

ERYFKRAD desaproves.

But there is any reason for that?

PS : I don't play 5E nor as any non arcane character, so I will not join.
PS 2 : I am glad that there is no arcane magic in Lacrymas bizarre setting, if he make paladins eunuchs, I wonder what he would do with wizards...

 

[ERYFKRAD]

But there is any reason for that?

In Lacrymas' setting only women with botched pregnancies are allowed to be angry about it.

 

[Cryomancer]

So, for him only losing a child allow you to enter rage and Barbarians are ONLY about rages... That is dumb. Barbarians should be savage tribal warriors. Raging is ONE ASPECT of Barbarian. According to Astonishing Swordsmen & Sorcerers of Hyperborea - page 25

 

[ERYFKRAD]

Yeah yeah I have that book too.

 

[Lacrymas]

But there is any reason for that?

In Lacrymas' setting only women with botched pregnancies are allowed to be angry about it.

Akshually, it has nothing to do with pregnancy. The child has to have been born and then somehow died.

 

[Reinhardt]

Can woman just kill child herself just to be able to join barbarian school?

 

[Lacrymas]

Can woman just kill child herself just to be able to join barbarian school?

Technically, yes. As long as nobody finds out she's the one who did it.

 

[Reinhardt]

Can woman just kill child herself just to be able to join barbarian school?

Technically, yes. As long as nobody finds out she's the one who did it.

But can she rage if it was her who did it?

 

[Cael]

Someone didn't think that one through...

 

[ERYFKRAD]

But there is any reason for that?

In Lacrymas' setting only women with botched pregnancies are allowed to be angry about it.

Akshually, it has nothing to do with pregnancy. The child has to have been born and then somehow died.

So it got botched after the act. Molto fucking difference.

 

[Lacrymas]

But can she rage if it was her who did it?

It isn't a metaphysical thing. It's cultural.

 

[Reinhardt]

But can she rage if it was her who did it?

It isn't a metaphysical thing. It's cultural.

It's not cultural. It's something she's expected to do in combat. So can she rage for dem sweet stat boosts or not? and if yes - why?

 

[Lacrymas]

But can she rage if it was her who did it?

It isn't a metaphysical thing. It's cultural.

It's not cultural. It's something she's expected to do in combat. So can she rage for dem sweet stat boosts or not? and if yes - why?

I mean, it's a cultural thing that only women are barbarians. Everyone can technically learn it, as it's a technique.

 

[Storyfag]

But can she rage if it was her who did it?

It isn't a metaphysical thing. It's cultural.

It's not cultural. It's something she's expected to do in combat. So can she rage for dem sweet stat boosts or not? and if yes - why?

I mean, it's a cultural thing that only women are barbarians. Everyone can technically learn it, as it's a technique.

Aren't there rogue settlements in your setting? Not controlled by the omnipresent fascist theocracy of the cities? Do these have male barbarians? What about the Orcs?

 

[Lacrymas]

Aren't there rogue settlements in your setting? Not controlled by the omnipresent fascist theocracy of the cities? Do these have male barbarians? What about the Orcs?

There are rogue settlements, yes. Raging is actually a technique the humans learned from the orcs (or at least it's an approximation of what the orcs do). I'm not sure whether there are male barbarians in the rogue settlements, it depends on how structured I'm going to make them. The sisterhood is an institution with an academy, so it's not like you can pick up the techniques casually.

 

[Yosharian]

Nobody ever captured one of these female barbarians and tortured them until they gave up the secret of raging

No spy ever snuck inside one of these academies and stole their secrets through basic observation

No Wizard ever cast a simple scrying spell to observe these techniques being taught in order to use them on his own slaves

 

[Cael]

Nobody ever captured one of these female barbarians and tortured them until they gave up the secret of raging

No spy ever snuck inside one of these academies and stole their secrets through basic observation

No Wizard ever cast a simple scrying spell to observe these techniques being taught in order to use them on his own slaves

No wizards, remember?

 

[NJClaw]

Nobody ever captured one of these female barbarians and tortured them until they gave up the secret of raging

No spy ever snuck inside one of these academies and stole their secrets through basic observation

No Wizard ever cast a simple scrying spell to observe these techniques being taught in order to use them on his own slaves

Jesus Christ, it's a setting. A setting is supposed to be a loosely coherent set of prompts and ideas to create interesting characters and experience interesting adventures, not a treatise on a perfectly rational and irreproachable alternative world.

 

[Lacrymas]

Nobody ever captured one of these female barbarians and tortured them until they gave up the secret of raging

No spy ever snuck inside one of these academies and stole their secrets through basic observation

No Wizard ever cast a simple scrying spell to observe these techniques being taught in order to use them on his own slaves

The bandits aren't as organized as you are implying. Sure, they might do that, but it would take literal years to learn the techniques in order to pass them along. Even if the bandit who was sent to do this has this much loyalty towards a rowdy group of thugs, there's no guarantee the settlement will still be there when he returns or the people in it will be alive. Besides, you can take the bandit out of the culture, but not the culture out of the bandit. They still have roughly the same cultural ideas with a few more freedoms and creative interpretations here and there. There might even be women barbarians in the bandit camps, but that also doesn't mean they are willing to teach these techniques to others.

 

[NJClaw]

POV: you're playing in Lacrymas' setting

 

[Larianshill]

 

[mondblut]

Sane people: "But...But it's in D&D rules, that anybody who ready to dedicate their live to magical studies could become a wizard, similar to how people become engineer or scientists IRL. Power of wizards would be different ofc, just as qualification of scientists IRL"
Lacrymas: "Reee why then not everybody wizard reee"
Sane people : "Because not everybody attracted to this career, just like not all people would like to spend their life on science IRL!

If studying engineering or science for a year would give you the ability to charm any hottie into blowing your cock or to electrocute the jocks who try to give you a wedgie, I'd imagine these professions would experience a dramatic increase in popularity.

Lacrymas is a fag, but he is not wrong. D&D is retarded to pretend that "anybody" can gain wizard's superpowers and most people just prefer not to because shoveling shit over their turnip fields is so much more fulfilling than casting charm person at your crush. This is plain dumb. And when wizardry talents are only available to a select few gifted individuals, as it should be, this inevitably slides either into a ruthless magocracy or into a place where anyone suspected of having the gift is killed on the spot.

 

[mondblut]

That is very weird, please clarify your reasons behind that.

If they break that vow and someone finds out, they get castrated. I figured they should get something special, i.e. Lay on Hands is the only character-based healing, in order to "justify" the immense requirements.

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?

(if you know what I mean...)

Here is an idea: your mana is literally your sperm. In order to cast a lot of magic, you have to conserve it. Jerk off, and you won't be able to cast a single cantrip for a day or two.

Spellcasting also puts an increasing strain on your libido, and an oft-practicing wizard finds himself essentially a sexless creature over time. All those bimbos he wanted to charm are now useless to him. An aspiring student of wizardry is thus trading the ability to get laid a few times early on for a lifetime of impotency. That's why most people don't care about becoming wizards.

 

[Lacrymas]

^ I like it.

 

[Sarathiour]

That is very weird, please clarify your reasons behind that.

If they break that vow and someone finds out, they get castrated. I figured they should get something special, i.e. Lay on Hands is the only character-based healing, in order to "justify" the immense requirements.

What's the consequences for paladins using "Lay on Hands" on their own junk..?

(if you know what I mean...)

Here is an idea: your mana is literally your sperm. In order to cast a lot of magic, you have to conserve it. Jerk off, and you won't be able to cast a single cantrip for a day or two.

Spellcasting also puts an increasing strain on your libido, and an oft-practicing wizard finds himself essentially a sexless creature over time. All those bimbos he wanted to charm are now useless to him. An aspiring student of wizardry is thus trading the ability to get laid a few times early on for a lifetime of impotency. That's why most people don't care about becoming wizards.

...

Feel familiar ...

Spoiler