[LP CYOA] 傳

[Azira]

Oh yeah! Hobo Rider!!

 

[ChumBucket]

That was beautiful. I want more!

 

[Baltika9]

Gives me some strong Senya vibes, what with the amnesia, hyper intellect, delinquent past and superb hand-eye coordination.

 

[treave]

Yeah, but Hobo Rider himself is a left-over concept from Epic after all.

 

[Baltika9]

Didn't say it's a bad thing, we haven't taken him down the path of ultimate villainy, after all.

 

[Jester]

"I can also assemble explosives, gut things expertly with a knife and shoot someone in the head with a pistol from fifty metres away"
treave how did he check this?

 

[treave]

By checking his terrorism privilege.

 

[Baltika9]

Is that how we're calling character sheets now?

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Because Jing knows Zhang's LUCK stat? Bro, pls.

No, you just need to be less about these things. Jing have acknowledged that manxing is unnaturally 'lucky' long ago.

again, being lucky a few times doesn't mean Jing is going to necessarily think he has a superpower and he hasn't seemed to so far. It's not like everything is constantly going right for Zhang in an overtly noticeable way. His dick fell off FFS. I haven't seen an ounce of worry about attacking him that didn't stem from his being a proven trickster - eg, the multiple poison powders, the hidden armor he wore in the forrest.

Why didn't Yang eat him? Probably had a lot to do with him being all sickly and disgusting at the time. Or maybe the fact that he was a somewhat capable fighter with nothing to lose and Yang had long desired an apprentice. Why didn't Yang eat us btw?

As to the demon:
I and a few others in fact did assume it was a demon offering the choices. I thought you did too actually. While I concede to E's point of Jing not realizing presently because the demon has ensnared him, I kind of feel like there should have been more hints as to which option was the resist the demon choice. I think that most of us assumed that whatever answer we said would be true due to the bit about the voice knowing if we're lying and would merely determine in what way the demon twisted our soul. There wasn't much indicator that "nothing." was a troll answer. Blah blah. All's we'll that ends harem.

 

[Sunnmøring]

Do you happen to have anything published that we can throw money at you for, treave?

 

[Nevill]

again, being lucky a few times doesn't mean Jing is going to necessarily think he has a superpower and he hasn't seemed to so far.

No, a few times are probably not enough.

When it happens consistently and each next case reinforces the last, that's when you might get slightly suspicious. But never let that confuse you. We need a rational explanation for luck, right?

It's not like everything is constantly going right for Zhang in an overtly noticeable way. His dick fell off FFS.

Indeed. Which is why my statement is that his luck pertains to situations that are life-threatening, but not to the humiliation he suffered by our hand. He is immune to murder, but not to rape-bears.

Unless, of course, you insist that a dick falling off is equivalent to death.

I haven't seen an ounce of worry about attacking him that didn't stem from his being a proven trickster - eg, the multiple poison powders, the hidden armor he wore in the forrest.

That's because how his luck manifests itself. He always has a trick up his sleeve, and by some miracle it always ends up saving him by the skin of his teeth. And when he doesn't have a trick, he always ends up up waving his blade around just right, or the opponent ends up targeting the wrong part of his body, or something else happens.

Meanwhile, Hei brothers probably had no less tricks to protect them. Didn't help them one bit.

As to the demon:
I and a few others in fact did assume it was a demon offering the choices. I thought you did too actually.

No way. Did two failed saving throws in a row and a memory loss tip you off?

Yes, everyone knew it by that point, but I assumed the question carried a different meaning. I explained it back then.

For the record, I do not regret how it turned out. My option would have turned far worse.

Though I do regret a little that 'for women' didn't win.

 

[Esquilax]

Unless, of course, you insist that a dick falling off is equivalent to death.

This is Lambchop you're talking to. Having your dick fall off is a fate worse than death.

 

[Baltika9]

Bros, I'm not against the DISCUSS!, but every false alert is like sticking a new needle under my toenail.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

again, being lucky a few times doesn't mean Jing is going to necessarily think he has a superpower and he hasn't seemed to so far.

No, a few times are probably not enough.

When it happens consistently and each next case reinforces the last, that's when you might set slightly suspicious. But never let that confuse you. We need a rational explanation for luck, right?

um, no, but a character that isn't aware this is a lp might. Which is kinda my point. Hence, it's meta to start making decisions based on this guy's perceived power of luck when any reasonable person in Jing's position wouldn't assume he has some sort of luck powered invulnerability field and would instead be like "huh, I guess the guy is just really lucky...apart from his dick falling off and all...and getting his hand cut off...and his ear...and having his allies turn on him...and having green puss oozing everywhere...but other than that really lucky...yeah..." And probably wouldn't make a lot of tactical decisions based off suspicions about how lucky he seems to be either.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Unless, of course, you insist that a dick falling off is equivalent to death.

This is Lambchop you're talking to. Having your dick fall off is a fate worse than death.

Damn straight!

 

[Nevill]

Sorry, bro.

If you don't see Jing commenting on how lucky manxing is to live for as long as he did with his non-existant abilities and a suicidal attitude when far better fighters have fallen before us; if you don't see him commenting on zhang's amazing cockroach-like vitality - that is just another word for a 'luck powered invulnerability field' - then there is nothing I can do to convince you.

Attempts to kill zhang manxing didn't go well for Jing or Bai Jiutian before, and the man is yet to score a single victory against us. It isn't enough to stop the character from trying altogether, but I think it might influence how important he views the task when there is something else to do, especially since planting the guy in the dirt face-first worked out for us far better in comparison.

 

[a cut of domestic sheep prime]

Sorry, bro.

If you don't see Jing commenting on how lucky manxing is to live for as long as he did with his non-existant abilities and a suicidal attitude when far better fighters have fallen before us; if you don't see him commenting on zhang's amazing cockroach-like vitality - that is just another word for a 'luck powered invulnerability field'

Ah, I see now. Funny comments about how lucky or how difficult to kill someone is equate to ascribing supernatural abilities to them and being totally serious about it. Makes perfect sense. Meeeeetaaa.

 

[Nevill]

I am unsure if you aren't doing it on purpose.

One thing (neutralizing) works, the other (murder) doesn't.

Now let's try the other thing again and again. Because this time it will be different. Because this time, it will definitely succeed.

...do you know the definition of insanity?


Anyway, this has no bearing on the choice. I am not saying we should not fight zhang manxing. I am saying we should not try to murder him 'just because'. These statements are different.


Seriously, though. You write these things, observed by none other than our character:

But seriously, everyone who has outright tried to kill him has failed and suffered for it. When we did it we failed, took that rep hit and exposed our WQS to Bai for nothing. When Bai did it, she failed and then she had to be "saved" by Jing. Edit: and had we tried to go all out on him just now, we would have gotten that pink powder in our face for our trouble.

I think Shun was the first to realize this peculiarity about him. Hence why he sent him to compete in the arena when we first met him. Shun realized that the best way to deal with Zhang is to let someone else deal with him.

You write that Shun might have noticed this unusual trait.

But then you state that it is completely outside of our character's abilities to come to the same conclusion.

 

[treave]

Do you happen to have anything published that we can throw money at you for, treave?

Nope. Besides, I won't ask people to pay for something I wouldn't spend money on. And the last thing I want is to treat you guys as customers. That'd make me accountable for the shit I pull.

Can't have that.
Speaking of which, I just noticed that the first actual story update is on the 3rd, so... yeah.

 

[Baltika9]

 

[treave]

"Here. Is water. Drink up, is good for you." Furfagg hands me a dodgy-looking flask - though I have to clasp it with two hands, in his bear-like paws it looks like a tiny trinket. Behind us, the smoke rising into the sky tells of my narrow escape from the jaws of death. Pretty big jaws, those. I really had to work to get out of them.

I drink. And wince. "Water?"

"Well... maybe a leeetle extra. But still considered water, da?"

I can feel the alcohol coursing through my system. I nod, and say carefully, “In a manner of speaking, I suppose?”

“Now you get it.” He grins, the animal ears perched cutely on top of his shaggy head wiggling in approval.

“Hey, Furfagg,” calls out Foul-Mouthed Cheung, his customary cigarette perched between his lips. Where Furfagg is big, hairy, and talks in a measured manner, Cheung is skinny, bald, and rattles his words in a rapid Chinatown patois that I sometimes fully understand only a second after he’s finished flapping his gums. “Have been meaning to ask you-lah, you really a fucking fag or what?”

Furfagg’s bushy brow knits together, and for a moment I wonder if he’s going to maul Cheung to death. Then, he shakes his head benignly, his voice a low rumble. “Nyet. No homo. Grand Kaiser Puchin would not have approved.”

“Grand… what’s that? Some sort of giant robot cartoon?” I ask, but Furfagg does not respond, instead looking nostalgically into the sky. I notice him absent-mindedly touching the scars that litter his body. Those are definitely the scars of war, left behind by bullets and knives. His past before becoming Furfagg is probably no less complicated than mine… well, if I could remember it.

“Huh,” Cheung doesn’t seem convinced. He stubs the cigarette on the pavement and pushes up the stylish rounded sunglasses that keep sliding down his nose. “If you say so. You got figure out how to get our asshole or not?”

“You mean man with scorpion in eye and snake in arm? Da, I have way. But do such strange man really exist?”

“We live in a city of superheroes,” I point out, regretting my decision to be Captain Obvious a split-second later. I really need to stop getting influenced by Sara.

“Da, da,” agrees Furfagg, nodding his head patiently, “but is highly impractical. Scorpion shit in eye socket. Cleaning is bitch.”

Foul-Mouthed Cheung cackles shrilly. “Sounds like a fucking bitch all right. Eh, you know-ah, this half-cocked fella reminds me of a story, you know?

“Another one of your made-up tales about how you know this prostitute and this john, Cheung?” I sigh. Every time I meet him, he has a bawdy tale to tell, but they never stray from the basic formula of boy meets girl, boy pays for sex with girl, shit happens in a way that kinda makes you want to laugh but also makes you feel bad deep down inside for laughing.

“No, no, just listen to me first, okay? Then you want to talk cock also fine. This is a story passed down by my great grandmother, you know? Not some hooker story-leh!”

“Is fine?” shrugs Furfagg, ready to lend Cheung a ear. “We have a bit of time for story. You have to relax some time, Hobo.”

“Yalor,” grins Cheung as he sees me give in. He gets up, standing with his legs apart and his arms held out dramatically. “Let me tell you the title first. This is called Big Wang and the Gang-“

“It is another one of your sex stories!” you blurt out, feeling betrayed.

“No-lah!” protests Cheung vehemently. “Listen to me first can or not? This is authentic, okay? My amma’s amma, and her amma before her, can confirm this is fucking true-lah! It’s a real-life kung-fu story! Got a priest, a monk and a beggar piak evildoers along with their little apprentice. Action-packed, very geng!”

I groan. When Cheung gets over-excited the slang gets worse. If he’s going to keep this up through his telling I am pretty sure I won’t understand half of it.

“So? Okay right? Now that you interested, I can start hor? Good, good. This one, long ago, back in ancient China. Got this place called Wu-Tang-“

“Isn’t that the ancient hip-hop record you’ve always got playing in your shop?”

“Hey, fuck you-lah! You want listen or not? I’m telling it as I heard it, okay?”

“Fine, fine. Go ahead.”

“Anyway, as I was saying, there was this Wu-Tang, and a dude from there called Big Wang, and so he was travelling with his friends-lah…”

***

A. Listen to the tale, Foul-Mouthed Cheung-style.

B. Listen to the tale as it truly was.

***

I'll have a Gaiden update up on the 1st, regular update on the 3rd.

 

[Esquilax]

I'll have a Gaiden update up on the 1st

 

[Baltika9]

*gasp* Are we going to see Little Zhang?

 

[Azira]

Def' A on that one.

 

[Baltika9]

If this is an actual vote, then B.