Baldur's Gate Baldur's Cringe 3 compilation thread

[Chippy]

Because the colour black is all colours combined so it's intrinsically diverse. Oh wait, I got that wrong didn't I.

The interesting thing is that even if all the characters are black, how come they're all so fucking ugly?. Not a single female black hottie in there at all? I think Larian are saying that black women are the most undesirable, ugly women on the planet. They need to check their unconscious bias there.

 

[Padzi]

Not really proper cringe, but the number of gay people in the game is... quite significant.
I don't remember there being so many even in BioWare games. I'm not counting the whole team; everyone companion is bi anyway.
But I mean the npcs, both gays and lesbians. Just so many around every corner.

 

[Cheesedragon117]

This is funny. I actually have some characters in my fantasy setting, that can often be heard saying things like this. Except, rather than being party members, they're the most black-hearted and viscous villains you could ever have the displeasure of encountering.


Oh, but it's my mores that are skewed, right??

 

[Stella Brando]

strong independent gith lady

Nothing screams "independent" more than the wish to serve good under your lich monarch.

This "German" sounds like he's from Bismark, Ohio...

 

[Stella Brando]

What I really want to know is (might even buy the game if this is true) is there a summon goat spell? Or a BG1 equivelant wand of polymorphing > goat?. We might want the Welsh and the Arabs to feel the inclusivity as the goaty goat shaggers of the world.

Thanks for leaving New Zealanders out, arsehole.

 

[Stella Brando]

She's perfectly fine [narrating]. If you need that male voice to get your juices flowing, your're probably a faggot.

Tone is wrong, ruins the atmosphere. Her voice would be better suited for a fairy tale.

What is the difference between fantasy and a fairy tale? Is it like dolls and action figures?

 

[Barbarian]

I'm not particular outraged by blacks being in this game, being that this has been a longtime feature(decades) of D&D and the forgotten realms.

The original series itself had black characters(Dynaheir, Valygar and Mazzy) and nobody gave a shit back then. You might argue "but that is just two!" well only companions and a couple of main enemies had portraits in the games. There was off course other token diversity hires - like Yoshimo. Minsc, Edwin and Jaheira had ethnic accents as well.

The faggotry though, it is nigh unbearable and total justification to the "de-woke" mods. Don't know what they were thinking in making basically half the characters openly gay. Deep gnomes in particular are 100% gay, to the point one wonders how exactly members of this race actually reproduce.

 

[Robber Baron]

The amount of black dwarves/elves is especially bizarre

thankfully moddable

 

[Melcar]

Sarevok was a negro too. To be honest I never thought of him as black and was kind of shocked at his ToB portrait. I envisioned him as a swarthy fellow in the original BG, as the skin color on his unarmored avatar was not exactly black. And his armored avatar seemed to have whitish skin.

 

[Alienman]

Sarevok was a negro too. To be honest I never thought of him as black and was kind of shocked at his ToB portrait. I envisioned him as a swarthy fellow in the original BG, as the skin color on his unarmored avatar was not exactly black. And his armored avatar seemed to have whitish skin.

He was just scorched by one too many fireballs.

 

[luj1]

Wow this game is incredibly ugly (and not because of niggas)

 

[luj1]

Not really proper cringe, but the number of gay people in the game is... quite significant.
I don't remember there being so many even in BioWare games.

Yup, 2024 Larian makes BioWare seem based af

 

[JarlFrank]

Deep gnomes in particular are 100% gay, to the point one wonders how exactly members of this race actually reproduce.

They're called deep gnomes because they take it in the butt.

 

[luj1]

aka Svirfneblin

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Gesundheit!

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Wow this game is incredibly ugly (and not because of niggas)

URSALA the sea witch is in this game?

Let me ask a nigga crab

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Yeah, that wasn't helpful at all. Stupid crustacean.

 

[GaelicVigil]

Sarevok was a negro too. To be honest I never thought of him as black and was kind of shocked at his ToB portrait. I envisioned him as a swarthy fellow in the original BG, as the skin color on his unarmored avatar was not exactly black. And his armored avatar seemed to have whitish skin.

I bought and played Baldur's Gate 1 on launch and this is the first time since then that I've heard he was black. I always assumed he was a white guy with a deep voice like Darth Vader. Wow!

Wasn't Sarevok's father a white guy that leads the iron throne? Was he adopted?

 

[Melcar]

Sarevok was a negro too. To be honest I never thought of him as black and was kind of shocked at his ToB portrait. I envisioned him as a swarthy fellow in the original BG, as the skin color on his unarmored avatar was not exactly black. And his armored avatar seemed to have whitish skin.

I bought and played Baldur's Gate 1 on launch and this is the first time since then that I've heard he was black. I always assumed he was a white guy with a deep voice like Darth Vader. Wow!

Wasn't Sarevok's father a white guy that leads the iron throne? Was he adopted?

He was adopted too like the PC.

 

[Semiurge]

This thread has been a monumental disappointment to me, so in the interest of supporting haters and trash talkers across the globe, I’ve decided to offer a prize for the poster who can make me cringe the most with a screenshot or *short* video clip from Baldur's Gate 3.

-Prize will be a game of your choice from GoG, valued at $20 CAD or less. I’ll send you a code via PM.

-Contest ends at an arbitrary time of my choosing next Saturday

-keep video clips really short please, like 2 minutes is pushing the limits. I want a *quick* laugh/cringe which is fun in short doses but becomes painful very quickly.

-Everyone is allowed to enter, even if you’re one of my forum enemies or a BG3 superfan

Your brother in hatred,
jaekl

Current contest leader: consgay with trenchcoat guy talking about baldur's gate in a storage locker

I don't need a prize but I'm happy to share the cringe screenshot collection I took for my friend who can't play it yet (I maintain that it's still a fun game overall though). Pretty much everything Gale and Halsin say makes me burn with embarrassment so I've just chosen my favourite 2 for them, but if you want more cringe from them just search for any of their dialogue on youtube.

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I'm overcome with the desire to watch Naked Lunch again.

 

[Iucounu]

The interesting thing is that even if all the characters are black, how come they're all so fucking ugly?. Not a single female black hottie in there at all?

White women don't like being outcompeted That would "sexualize" black women, which is "racist". Obviously that kind of thinking comes straight from white puritanism, black women themselves usually have no problem being sexual.

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

Indeed! Every pimp and honkey knows that.

 

[KeighnMcDeath]

 

[damager]

So I just started this game... and holy shit guys. I'm not sure if I have ever seen so much stupid happening in such a short time.

First that little fag elve tries to overwhelm my 17 strength wood elven babarian that's build like Conan AND his cleric gf. Than I take him with me to travel wit me, 2 min after he held a knife to my throat?

Dude has orders to not let anybody in the druid camp, but because of 5 goblins at the gate he lets us, some total strangers, in??? I can't even ask him where I am, after I landed with a tentacle space ship in the middle of nowhere (could be another plane by all I know), but I can ask him about his problems as Tiefling refugee??

He says the head honcho owes me something because I saved the camp. Again because I helped killing FIVE goblins??? These dudes have guards and bows and giant walls and weapons smiths in the camp.

This feels like a fuckin parodie. Like somebody changed the dialogue files before he uploaded this to prank software pirates.

 

[Fedora Master]

If you are this anal about the writing I suggest you fuckle up, bucko, because it's only gonna get worse.