Baldur's Gate Baldur's Cringe 3 compilation thread

[lightbane]

Necromancer horror, you say? I think they were aiming for this demonic RL creature:

WARNING! RL CHAOS HORROR!

Spoiler

 

[Catacombs]

thank you kind stranger i too love poop jokes

EDIT 2: Thanks for the gold!

 

[Rhobar121]

The funny thing is that even though some people shit so much on reddit, they spend a suspicious amount of time there.

 

[EdgyRightWinger]

He's not wrong.

 

[potatojohn]

I hate this

humor

 

[JarlFrank]

 

[Rhobar121]

I only have one question. What kind of degenerate sites are you browsing to find such crap?

 

[Camel]

I only have one question. What kind of degenerate sites are you browsing to find such crap?

Mainstream gaming news sites.

 

[GrainWetski]

I only have one question. What kind of degenerate sites are you browsing to find such crap?

https://www.thegamer.com/baldurs-gate-3-shadowheart-fought-people-for-deadnaming-trans-friend/
https://www.thegamer.com/baldurs-gate-3-reddit-no-willy-physics/
https://www.thegamer.com/baldurs-gate-3-poly-romance-options-relationships-rpg/
https://www.thegamer.com/baldurs-gate-3-bare-guys-hiding-character-creator/

 

[Padzi]

Through the entire EA, I thought that Raphael is a cool devil guy. But The more I know about him after the release version came out, the more cringeworthy he seems to me.
Like for example the whole thing with Harleep, his self-insert fan fics, etc. Pure cringe.

 

[jf8350143]

Wyll is changed into a devil very early in the game and when you talk to him later in the game he will always act like he is still a normal person, except one time he will says his dick has thorns now.

They have this relatively cool premise and all they can do is put a dick joke in there, and nothing else.

 

[Maddiereno]

Long time lurker here.

Dear everyone in this thread, I've been feeling that something was definitely and horribly wrong ever since I started playing BG3. All the reviews and reactions I've seen so far were overwhelmingly positive and that made me question whether or not I was being wrong for disliking most of the game.

Thank you very much for restoring my faith in my own mental capabilities and the stupidity of people.

Kind regards.

BTW Halsin is THE CRINGE this whole game. An archdruid being zoophiliac bisexual hunk dude with tree-like arms and 10 str score is about as likely as pope being an openly gay black jew with rainbow coloured hair.

 

[Lambach]

BTW Halsin is THE CRINGE this whole game. An archdruid being zoophiliac bisexual hunk dude with tree-like arms and 10 str score is about as likely as pope being an openly gay black jew with rainbow coloured hair.

I'm betting you a 100 Euros that the next Pope will be exactly that.

 

[Black]

 

[0wca]

You're forgetting one thing: Mike Merls was guiding this project alongside swen.

He was WotC's woke emissary.

 

[Cryomancer]

I din't did it cuz I got so discusted that quickly pressed F8 but seriously. You can f*** a Mindflayer!!! This is beyond ridiculous. BTW, lv 9 at moment with about 60% to lv 10.

 

[PorkyThePaladin]

Larian has a simple game design philosophy: you can fuck anything that moves, and you can make a joke about anything that's not actually funny.

 

[Rean]

Bet you're missing Pillars of Eternity now.

 

[deuxhero]

I din't did it cuz I got so discusted that quickly pressed F8 but seriously. You can f*** a Mindflayer!!! This is beyond ridiculous. BTW, lv 9 at moment with about 60% to lv 10.

Don't Mindlfayers, who reproduce by infesting humanoids with parasitic larva, canonically not have gentiles?

 

[Cryomancer]

Bet you're missing Pillars of Eternity now.

Nope. Baizuo's Gate 3 is a much better game, despite the woke virus infecting it. I would say that I liked BG3 more than PF:WoTR but less than PF:KM.

What I really hate about BG3 is the epic low level adventure. I have adventured into the shadowfell, protected a city from hordes of enemies, solved the riddles of Shar and entered into the Astral Space to save a Aasimar, then destroyed a weird cultist tower and invaded a mindflayer colony and killed a powerful guy who become literally the avatar of Myrkul. This at lv 8. And is more epic than nwn - hotu. Other huge problem is the 5e ruleset.

Don't Mindlfayers, who reproduce by infesting humanoids with parasitic larva, canonically not have gentiles?

Yep. They should't even have a concept for gender. Same for family, paternity, maternity and so on.

 

[deuxhero]

5E has horrifically bad power scaling because its shit mechanics (there's a defense cap everything naturally hits) mean the only thing it can do to make fights harder is give them bigger blobs of HP. That's why there's "epic" adventures at level 8

 

[PorkyThePaladin]

Bet you're missing Pillars of Eternity now.

Nope. Baizuo's Gate 3 is a much better game, despite the woke virus infecting it. I would say that I liked BG3 more than PF:WoTR but less than PF:KM.

People used to say this about Divinity: Original Shits. "Oh, these games are great despite the horrible writing!" Then I played them, and to try to enjoy them despite the horrible writing is like trying to eat a candy bar completely covered by shit.

 

[thesecret1]

there's a defense cap everything naturally hits

This is actually incline. In systems without it, the entire setting stops making sense as there's no reason a single level 5 person couldn't defeat an army of 100 billion kobolds (as they literally cannot hit him) or why a single tougher creature doesn't go and glass entire cities (because, again, the defenders wouldn't even be able to hit it).

Also idk what you are on about with level 8 being too epic - levels 5 to 10 signify national heroes that save entire regions, 10-15 are for saving whole countries, and 15-20 are literally heroes of the universe. It's not bad scaling either - have you ever gone from level 1 to level 5 in PnP DnD? The amount of adventures you had to have gone through to get the EXP for it should more than warrant a national hero status, and a level of play whre whole cities are at stake

 

[deuxhero]

WotC had already figured out how to avoid the issue of mobs that can't hit due to high defenses: Make defenses not universal, and allow stacking mods. Even in 3e, the kobolds can take our high level hero, surround him (+2), entangle him with nets (effectively a +2), get their shaman to Bless them (+1), and get their skald to sing an epic hymn (+1) just within core, or attack him with flaming oil (AoE is a reflex save for half). Saga Edition also solved it by making autofire an AoE, and thus let even stormtroopers hit consistently at the cost of lower damage and heavy ammo consumption (even Vader would be worn down by a group of ~50 men with rifles).

 

[PorkyThePaladin]

Regardless of the defense cap, nothing will be able to hit your character in BG3, from what I hear. His back will be covered by the bear fucking him up the arse, and his front by the Mind Flayer sucking him off.