Baldur's Gate Baldur's Gate 3 RELEASE THREAD

[Padzi]

Karlach (the roided up reddit tranny)

Karlach is not half bad, compared to for exaple Cassandra from DAI or all females from ME: Andromeda.

 

[Modron]

Karlach is not half bad, comeres to for exaple Cassandra from DAI or all females from ME: Andromeda.

So really bad?

 

[Padzi]

Karlach is not half bad, comeres to for exaple Cassandra from DAI or all females from ME: Andromeda.

So really bad?

*compared
(my bad)

 

[Non-Edgy Gamer]

Karlach is the most boring character ever. I laughed when she burned to a crisp at the end.

And I get that they wanted her to be likeable, but they didn't have to make her a scarified giant.

Every tiefling in the game has a build like an elf, but here comes Karlach with shoulders like a linebacker.

 

[Darkwind]

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Maybe, but said characters weren't such faggots about it.

Since my brother is gay I've come into contact with the gay scene and I was surprised how normal most of them are.

LOL- nope!

Hang around them a little longer and after a few drinks and the degeneracy will reach levels you cannot even imagine. "They are just like us!" is the ultimate naive shitlib take on everything including race. Wait until you see one of them pull their shit encrusted cock out of the other's ass. Then come back and tell us all how normal they are. Just like the Codex, it all appears normal at first too. Spend a little more time and see the dark underbelly, newfag.

 

[MerchantKing]

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

There are no Gnomes in this game.

 

[Darkwind]

Karlach (the roided up reddit tranny)

Karlach is not half bad, compared to for exaple Cassandra from DAI or all females from ME: Andromeda.

Ass cancer is not half bad compared to testicle cancer or all the types of bone cancer. Low bar is low...

 

[Lagole Gon]

Karlach (the roided up reddit tranny)

Karlach is not half bad, compared to for exaple Cassandra from DAI or all females from ME: Andromeda.

Never bothered with DAI.
But as a fan of germanic female manjaw, I have to ask: what makes Cassandra bad?

 

[Lyric Suite]

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

There are no Gnomes in this game.

It's because all the characters are designed for sex and manlets would look ridiculous.

 

[raeven]

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Maybe, but said characters weren't such faggots about it.

Since my brother is gay I've come into contact with the gay scene and I was surprised how normal most of them are.

LOL- nope!

Hang around them a little longer and after a few drinks and the degeneracy will reach levels you cannot even imagine. "They are just like us!" is the ultimate naive shitlib take on everything including race. Wait until you see one of them pull their shit encrusted cock out of the other's ass. Then come back and tell us all how normal they are. Just like the Codex, it all appears normal at first too. Spend a little more time and see the dark underbelly, newfag.

Imagine not knowing that 40% of couples have done anal before...

(In the US, anyway)

 

[Late Bloomer]

Was bored and decided to check on on the homosexuals, zoophiliacs, and the moral grandstanding hypocrits that play this game. Started a few pages back from the most recent. This is just one page, months after release.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Inb4, Larian is making LOTR cRPG

First Amazon, and now Larian? Peter Jackson's movies were already somewhat divergent from Tolkien's vision. I can't imagine how much tranny shit and occurrences of missing the point is Larian going throw in to further desecrate Tolkien's works with such a game?

Considering the writer for Zardoz, a fantasy film from the 1970s, intended to make an animated LOTR movie (Pre-Bakshi) that would involve full-frontal gay sex between Aragorn and Boramir, perverting LOTR seems to be a passtime of maladjusted nerds.

So I'm understanding that the default in FR is bisexual/pansexual? So if you play modern day D&D you're literally a faggot? If you have a group playing, either all of you are faggots or the setting is completely broken because you're not roleplaying it properly.

So for Mebs and other Ed Greenwood fans, this setting is only for faggots and groups of faggots?

It's interesting for all the faggot romance options, there isn't an option to say something like, "no thanks I'm not gay." Straight doesn't exist in this universe. How could any game/setting be more woke than having heterosexuality not even exist?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Is he a party member? I had no idea.

He is the guy who wants to fuck you as soon as a certain trigger happens so i guess he is basically defacto gay unless you play female, right?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Halsin isn't effeminate. But he is a weird faggot.

His motives and character are ridiculous. He's basically the bear sex meme + a druid. That's his character. There's very little beneath the surface.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Oh, no, you've got me wrong, I suck cock because I like it. The coke is just a bonus*

*I don't like coke.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

A massive deep roads exploring reference.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

they're gnomes, it's what they do

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

The pre-written adventure from the D&D Essentials Kit, Dragon of Icespire Peak, has a quest that features 2 deep gnome kings who are gay for each other.

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

 

[Lemming42]

 

[Cat Headed Eagle]

Was bored and decided to check on on the homosexuals, zoophiliacs, and the moral grandstanding hypocrits that play this game. Started a few pages back from the most recent. This is just one page, months after release.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Inb4, Larian is making LOTR cRPG

First Amazon, and now Larian? Peter Jackson's movies were already somewhat divergent from Tolkien's vision. I can't imagine how much tranny shit and occurrences of missing the point is Larian going throw in to further desecrate Tolkien's works with such a game?

Considering the writer for Zardoz, a fantasy film from the 1970s, intended to make an animated LOTR movie (Pre-Bakshi) that would involve full-frontal gay sex between Aragorn and Boramir, perverting LOTR seems to be a passtime of maladjusted nerds.

So I'm understanding that the default in FR is bisexual/pansexual? So if you play modern day D&D you're literally a faggot? If you have a group playing, either all of you are faggots or the setting is completely broken because you're not roleplaying it properly.

So for Mebs and other Ed Greenwood fans, this setting is only for faggots and groups of faggots?

It's interesting for all the faggot romance options, there isn't an option to say something like, "no thanks I'm not gay." Straight doesn't exist in this universe. How could any game/setting be more woke than having heterosexuality not even exist?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Is he a party member? I had no idea.

He is the guy who wants to fuck you as soon as a certain trigger happens so i guess he is basically defacto gay unless you play female, right?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Halsin isn't effeminate. But he is a weird faggot.

His motives and character are ridiculous. He's basically the bear sex meme + a druid. That's his character. There's very little beneath the surface.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Oh, no, you've got me wrong, I suck cock because I like it. The coke is just a bonus*

*I don't like coke.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

A massive deep roads exploring reference.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

they're gnomes, it's what they do

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

The pre-written adventure from the D&D Essentials Kit, Dragon of Icespire Peak, has a quest that features 2 deep gnome kings who are gay for each other.

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

i'm sorry you're short

 

[MerchantKing]

that play this game

This alone is assuming a lot. I haven't play this game since the first couple weeks of launch. I regret torrenting it in the first place. I doubt most of the people criticizing this trash and Lardian are playing it either.

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

There are no Gnomes in this game.

It's because all the characters are designed for sex and manlets would look ridiculous.

And sodomy is the domain of only halflings, medium sized, and larger races. Homosexuality is punishible by death in Gnomish society according to the Gnomish Torah.

 

[Hagashager]

Was bored and decided to check on on the homosexuals, zoophiliacs, and the moral grandstanding hypocrits that play this game. Started a few pages back from the most recent. This is just one page, months after release.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Inb4, Larian is making LOTR cRPG

First Amazon, and now Larian? Peter Jackson's movies were already somewhat divergent from Tolkien's vision. I can't imagine how much tranny shit and occurrences of missing the point is Larian going throw in to further desecrate Tolkien's works with such a game?

Considering the writer for Zardoz, a fantasy film from the 1970s, intended to make an animated LOTR movie (Pre-Bakshi) that would involve full-frontal gay sex between Aragorn and Boramir, perverting LOTR seems to be a passtime of maladjusted nerds.

So I'm understanding that the default in FR is bisexual/pansexual? So if you play modern day D&D you're literally a faggot? If you have a group playing, either all of you are faggots or the setting is completely broken because you're not roleplaying it properly.

So for Mebs and other Ed Greenwood fans, this setting is only for faggots and groups of faggots?

It's interesting for all the faggot romance options, there isn't an option to say something like, "no thanks I'm not gay." Straight doesn't exist in this universe. How could any game/setting be more woke than having heterosexuality not even exist?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Is he a party member? I had no idea.

He is the guy who wants to fuck you as soon as a certain trigger happens so i guess he is basically defacto gay unless you play female, right?

How is Halsin effeminate?

Halsin isn't effeminate. But he is a weird faggot.

His motives and character are ridiculous. He's basically the bear sex meme + a druid. That's his character. There's very little beneath the surface.

You'd be surprised at what doesn't make you gay.

Tell me you have sucked dick for coke, without telling me you have sucked dick for coke. It is ok man, we all have our crosses to bear. Cocaine is a hell of a drug! (h/t Rick James)

Oh, no, you've got me wrong, I suck cock because I like it. The coke is just a bonus*

*I don't like coke.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

A massive deep roads exploring reference.

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

they're gnomes, it's what they do

Is there a lore reason why every single Deep Gnome in the game is gay?

The pre-written adventure from the D&D Essentials Kit, Dragon of Icespire Peak, has a quest that features 2 deep gnome kings who are gay for each other.

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan? Gnome women do look a bit better than gnome men, but not by much. All the sexy races like elves won't touch you with a bargepole. You might be one of those people who thinks Half-Orcs are hot as hell, but you're out of your mind if you think one of those big burly hunks or hunkesses is gonna touch your dinky little gnome junk.

The best thing to do is lez out or fag out - especially if you're a female gnome, because have you seen what male gnomes look like?! Just accept that you're an uggo gnome, find another uggo gnome of the same sex who looks passable, and push romance and sexuality out of your mind from that point on.

My quote wasn't about BG3.

Late Bloomer Credit where it's due: reading this whole thing was funny. I could hear In the Hall of the Mountain King the deeper I was going. Top Tier meme, good effort, 9/11 towers, would crash again.

 

[Late Bloomer]

Here is the conversation this game attracts. This is page 640, just one page back from the most recent.

at least halfling girls have nice feet

Imagine being a gnome. All the other gnomes look like shit, ugliest race ever, but you also look terrible since you're a gnome too. What's the plan?

Fuck goblins?

Gobbos are gorgeous, they're not gonna spend any time with a big-nosed freakazoid gnome, especially not a pallid-looking Deep Gnome. My only regret in BG3 is that you can't recruit Sazza. She was hot stuff and also a fantastic character, just totally motivated by craven self-preservation in any and all circumstances. No pretense, no convoluted backstory, no quippy one-liners like most other characters, just absolute naked self-serving cowardice. You know where you stand with Sazza, she's the best.

Yeah, what's the first thing you would do after being imprisoned by father of your loved one, after you kill him mercilessly?
!!! Fuck !!!
And be very vocal about it

jaheira.docx

Yeah, what's the first thing you would do after being imprisoned by father of your loved one, after you kill him mercilessly?
!!! Fuck !!!
And be very vocal about it

jaheira.docx

Can you let me know if you have to be a big faggot to play D&D in the forgotten realms setting? Or at least your character has to be

Only (specific) queers and actual autists enjoy modern FR.

Ah, bereavement, the sexiest of a woman's states.

More like that today people are a bounch of crybabies. In past nobody cared about this stuff but today with ultra conservative lunatics and ultra liberal lunatics everything is in a sort of "Scandal culture".

If not bg3 depitcted the FR more in line in spirit with the oiriginal creator of them.

This reminds me of when I pointed out all the stuff that was "woke" in jagged alliance 2 in the JA3 thread because people were pre-emptively losing their minds over nothing.

It was like people have forgotten games had gay characters before 2010....

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Maybe, but said characters weren't such faggots about it.

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Having a gay character in a game is so 1980s.
Now we have entire gay species.
I'm still waiting for somebody to show me a gnomish heterosexual couple in the game.
Because there's like 7 gnome homo couples.

How do gnomes even breed? Do they have a secret gnome breeding island?

According to Dragon magazine (issue 131 if anyone wants to look up the article) deep gnomes do have a
View attachment 44964

but prior to BG3 I assumed that that was just relative to attrition due to living in the Underdark and not a result of them all being gay. God bless the apparently vanishingly rare heterosexual deep gnome females that must be working overtime to keep the species alive.

I wish you could recruit Sazza the goblin from the 1 Act or one of those drunk kobolds. I think they went with only elfes/humans because who the fuck would like to fuck a goblin, yet alone a gnome... yuck. Yet there are many which banged the Emperor, so who knows. However there's a reason why tentacle porn is a thing and gnome porn isn't .

Should've made Sazza the straightest companion. "Wuts dis den guvna? You wanna do whut ta me?? Dats disgusting, dat is, ya facken queer!"

"Homersexulalty is a SIN in the eyes of Maglubiyet!"

Video games have had gay characters since the 1980s.

Having a gay character in a game is so 1980s.
Now we have entire gay species.
I'm still waiting for somebody to show me a gnomish heterosexual couple in the game.
Because there's like 7 gnome homo couples.

How do gnomes even breed? Do they have a secret gnome breeding island?

They do it like the Samurai. Women are chattle: vulgar, ugly creatures to be used for procreation and nothing more. It's a duty to be fulfilled.

*Romance* is for your brother-in-arms. Only another man can know the struggle.

I wish you could recruit Sazza the goblin from the 1 Act or one of those drunk kobolds. I think they went with only elfes/humans because who the fuck would like to fuck a goblin, yet alone a gnome... yuck. Yet there are many which banged the Emperor, so who knows. However there's a reason why tentacle porn is a thing and gnome porn isn't .

I banged the emperor and to be honest it was a lot more interesting, conversation wise, than my relationship with shadowheart.

I don't understand the love for that character, honestly I find her to be the least interesting of all the companions. Even Wyll (the negroe) has more personality than her.

 

[Non-Edgy Gamer]

Yeah... I think I'll just replay the originals again to try to cleanse my mind from this filth.

 

[raeven]

Yeah... I think I'll just replay the originals again to try to cleanse my mind from this filth.

You can try, but honestly the first two games are not nearly as good as the third entry.

Everyone here complains about it just because it's popular, but the Codex is supposed to be about choice and consequences, and the truth is that there's way way more of that in BG3 than in the first two entries. Plus even though 5th edition is fairly simplistic and easy to cheese if you want to, the fact that it's true turn based combat puts it heads and shoulders above the originals imo. I'm sure some people like RTwP but I can't stand it, especially being shoehorned into a system that was designed to be turn based like AD&D 2nd edition.

BG1 and 2 are good but flawed games. BG3 is flawed too, but it succeeds at things that really matter - giving you a sense of agency in the world, tons of ways to approach situations (tactically and otherwise), and the ability to see the consequences of your decisions play out - far better than its predecessors.

That's why everyone here just complains about the game having gay people in it, because otherwise they'd have to admit that a popular game is actually good.

 

[Lacrymas]

I am always the first to admit when a popular game is good, but BG3 is just mid and I already explained why.

 

[Swen]

Yeah... I think I'll just replay the originals again to try to cleanse my mind from this filth.

You can try, but honestly the first two games are not nearly as good as the third entry.

Everyone here complains about it just because it's popular, but the Codex is supposed to be about choice and consequences, and the truth is that there's way way more of that in BG3 than in the first two entries. Plus even though 5th edition is fairly simplistic and easy to cheese if you want to, the fact that it's true turn based combat puts it heads and shoulders above the originals imo. I'm sure some people like RTwP but I can't stand it, especially being shoehorned into a system that was designed to be turn based like AD&D 2nd edition.

BG1 and 2 are good but flawed games. BG3 is flawed too, but it succeeds at things that really matter - giving you a sense of agency in the world, tons of ways to approach situations (tactically and otherwise), and the ability to see the consequences of your decisions play out - far better than its predecessors.

That's why everyone here just complains about the game having gay people in it, because otherwise they'd have to admit that a popular game is actually good.

FACTS!

Let's be real here if this game didn't have any "woke" elements everyone would be sucking my dink now.

 

[Lacrymas]

If it didn't feature any woke elements it probably would've been better, yes. Not because of the lack of woke elements but because they would finally have had to try harder to say something and have companions worth listening to.

 

[Larianshill]

 

[NaturallyCarnivorousSheep]

I see that goblin gang is growing. Playable goblin race and Sazza companion in EE confirmed.

 

[Lagole Gon]

This is like that thing Frank Zappa was talking about.

 

[Yosharian]

I see that goblin gang is growing. Playable goblin race and Sazza companion in EE confirmed.

Where has this been confirmed?