From Software Elden Ring - From Software's new game with writing by GRRM

[mediocrepoet]

Either way, she's very good. Arguably the best ash summon.

The best ash summon is Latenna. Tiche might solo Malenia, but Latenna soloed my heart.

You like the girls who can't run away, eh?

 

[Efe]

doesnt latenna commit rape by impregnating sleeping albinauric giant?
or is that how she stole yo heart?

 

[mediocrepoet]

doesnt latenna commit rape by impregnating sleeping albinauric giant?
or is that how she stole yo heart?

It's immaculate conception. She's going to have albino Jesus when she wakes up.

 

[perfectslumbers]

doesnt latenna commit rape by impregnating sleeping albinauric giant?

Latenna impregnating her sleeping sister in a church

 

[mediocrepoet]

I tried recording a gameplay clip or two, but it basically cuts my frame rate to (if I had to guess) around half of what it normally sits at to play which is gross and then the recording is slightly less than that. I figure people would need to take motion sickness meds to watch it.
There goes my vtuber career.

 

[Efe]

what program are you using?
recording with amd's own software seems to work great. nvidia's own counterpart (shadowplay?) should work just as well if not better

 

[mediocrepoet]

what program are you using?
recording with amd's own software seems to work great. nvidia's own counterpart (shadowplay?) should work just as well if not better

I'll have to look into that. I've never tried before and just did it on a whim using whatever Microsoft Xbox game bar thing is built into windows. I knew it would tank performance, but underestimated how much.

 

[mediocrepoet]

As an aside, I think I found a new bug in 1.04. Every time I button mashed a successful escape from the Runebear's grab attack, it would let me go and then fall through the floor.

I mean, good riddance they're annoying af, but that can't be intended.

 

[Lyric Suite]

I tried recording a gameplay clip or two, but it basically cuts my frame rate to (if I had to guess) around half of what it normally sits at to play which is gross and then the recording is slightly less than that. I figure people would need to take motion sickness meds to watch it.
There goes my vtuber career.

I had that issue with the build in Windows 10 recording function (Xbox whatever the fuck is called). Switching to OBS solved it.

 

[Lutte]

what program are you using?
recording with amd's own software seems to work great. nvidia's own counterpart (shadowplay?) should work just as well if not better

I'll have to look into that. I've never tried before and just did it on a whim using whatever Microsoft Xbox game bar thing is built into windows. I knew it would tank performance, but underestimated how much.

I use nvidia's overlay recording tool, and I couldn't even notice the performance hit. Use the stuff your GPU vendor makes.

Depending on your upload speed, you might want to select lower resolution and FPS setting for the recording though. Video very quickly balloons in size which is a real hindrance on DSL. (does not affect gameplay, you can play at 60 and record at 30)

 

[Efe]

how do you escape from grabs?

 

[ERYFKRAD]

how do you escape from grabs?

Grease

 

[NJClaw]

how do you escape from grabs?

By mashing R1 and L1, but only if the grab attack deals multiple "ticks" of damage. You can't escape a grab that deals damage in a single big chunk.

 

[Child of Malkav]

how do you escape from grabs?

You don't.

 

[NJClaw]

After a forced break from the game to eat like a pig during the holidays, I came back to it to try to win Porky's approval. I know it's a hopeless endeavor and I will never be worthy of his porkeous respect, but I have to try nonetheless. Last time I failed him, facetanking everything with an overpowered bleed build. The lack of skill was self-evident, the shame striking and never-ending. This time, I must do better. For my honor. For Porky.

First, let's get rid of everything that made us impure. A naked canvas, ready to get porked:

Spoiler

Second, let's renounce the unholy stats. No more disgusting Dexterity or dirty Arcane. Only Strength, Endurance, and Vigor paint the way of the Porkster:

Spoiler

Third, the equipment.

Obviously, we need the biggest sword we have and an even bigger shield:

Spoiler

Then let's cover up our feminine features with something more appropriate to the task:

Spoiler

But let's not forget that beauty and style are paramount even on the battlefield. We need to complete our outfit with something that will enhance our womanly form:

Spoiler

As for the talismans:

Spoiler

We need the Great-Jar's Arsenal and the Erdtree's Favor +2 because we're fat fucks and wouldn't be able to move without them.

The Ritual Sword Talisman is an obvious choice, because we will always stay at maximum HP by never getting hit.

And the Dragoncrest Greatshield Talisman comes next, because we will obviously get hit a lot.

In our pockets, only Kool-Aid juice and some ice cubes to interrupt the old lady if we start to panic:

Spoiler

As for the pouch:

Spoiler

Some fire grease because I like my women well-done.

A bunch of aspirins because we're not kids anymore.

A pack of ribs to get pumped up.

An emergency milk flask in case the ribs are too spicy.

And we're ready to face Malenia. I will do this for you, Porky. I will beat all the old women in this world, if that's what it takes to become your squire.

 

[NJClaw]

I forgot the password of my YouTube account and now this was all for nothing... I will reset the password, Porky. I will do it for you!

EDIT:

 

[volklore]

Aaand done.

I applaud people who solo group bosses... or bosses like Malenia. I had to give her my best cheese to finally stand a chance to beat her after so many tries - get Black Knife Tiche summon, level up to +10, get some extra Mind for FP, Frost + Blood on weapons, obviously Bloodhound's Step to escape Waterfowl.

Someone said on steam that they nerfed elden beast AI Radagon DMG and cuckskin duo if you kill them at once, they won't respawn.

Radagon did not seem nerfed to me today. Although maybe he was spamming a little less recurrent aoe.
Elden Beast on the other hand... I struggled against it previously with my mimic. Today I have slain it on first try - before it even did the rings or any other aoe. Thought this was because of my new buddy Tiche, but maybe he was also nerfed hard?

Malenia is just a fucking slog, you can iframe dodge the second and third flurry of waterfowl (without BH step) if you stay spaced well enough and ouspace the first flury by sprint back. And she seems to have a 20 sec cooldown or so before she can use the move again. So you dance with her for 20 sec sneaking one or two attack or use high poise shit like wondrous physik and weapon skills giving you hyper armor to outstagger her (like lion's claw or warcry) and then back off until she does waterfowl, and repeat. It's a slog but it's doable. I felt like her second phase did waterfowl a lot less that first phase.

 

[Lutte]

I felt like her second phase did waterfowl a lot less that first phase.

That's because Scarlet Aeonia works on similar HP % triggers, and has priority over waterfowl. So if you burn her fast enough, you'll trigger another Scarlet Aeonia before she triggers another waterfowl.

 

[ELEXmakesMeHard]

Spoiler

The most Codexian ending must surely be either Goldmask (autistic puritan), Frenzied Flame (autistic screeching), or Dung Eater (self-explanatory). I'm just not sure which...

I'm also not sure whether Frenzied Flame or Dung Eater is most hopw roewur ne.

 

[HumanTotemPole]

Spoiler

The most Codexian ending must surely be either Goldmask (autistic puritan), Frenzied Flame (autistic screeching), or Dung Eater (self-explanatory). I'm just not sure which...

I'm also not sure whether Frenzied Flame or Dung Eater is most hopw roewur ne.

Spoiler

Goldmask is GRPG, Frenzied Flame is Politics, Dung Eater is GD.

 

[Anonona]

Spoiler

Goldmask is GRPG, Frenzied Flame is Politics, Dung Eater is GD.

Spoiler

Does that means Ranni's is JRPGD?

 

[HumanTotemPole]

Spoiler

Goldmask is GRPG, Frenzied Flame is Politics, Dung Eater is GD.

Spoiler

Does that means Ranni's is JRPGD?

Spoiler

Consider this snippet of Ranni's dialogue during the ending cutscene:

"A thousand year voyage under the wisdom of the Moon.
Here beginneth the chill night that encompasses all, reaching the great beyond.
Into fear, doubt, and loneliness... As the path stretcheth into darkness."

Clearly the player is on a divine journey to the Prosperium

 

[PorkyThePaladin]

Blah, blah, blah, blah...

Lol, you just can't help being a munchkin. Even when you are trying not to. Of all the shields, you just HAD to grab the most OP one.

Also, jokes aside, be careful. I know I have such a dominant personality that people like you can't help but be overwhelmed by it. But it starts with putting me in your signature, and next thing you know, you will be here at 3am, writing novels about me like our mutual friend Lithium Flower.

 

[Matador]

Hideaki Itsuno.

 

[Lyric Suite]

Just did this mostly for my own entertainment. Found a talisman that raises guard boost so for the fun of it i wanted to try it with the most fitting greatshield i found for the build/look i'm going for:



I tried to purposedly getting hit on the shield but all i managed to do is getting smacked in the face half the time lmao. I did block some big hits several times which was fun to see.