And God spoke; "I have given you pubs. Therefore, if a man on the Internet should criticise your staggering work of heartbreaking genius in a manner which you feel is unconstructive, spiteful or just plain unfair, go you to a pub, and there summon a multitude of your mates, getting ridiculously shitfaced while complaining bitterly about those moronic fucks who just don't get it, agonising over their every word. And your mates shall reply, as it is written, "Just ignore those losers, mate. We know it's awesome." And you shall wake up the next morning in a hedgerow, feeling very sick but better about the whole thing."
"And you shall not rather neglect the pub and take to the Internet as a platform from which you may begin to snipe publicly and unfairly at reviewers, bloggers and entire online communities, calling upon your fans to show their support for you, for this is an abomination unto your Lord and does you no honour."