Completed Let's solo Baldur's Gate on Insane (feat. The Codex)

[desocupado]

Good update. I'm kinda ansious for bg2.

 

[Oesophagus]

Good update. I'm kinda ansious for bg2.

this

Also it seems like this LP may actually be finished. I salute your endurance brother MicoSelva

Also also a question: since I've never played bg2 with a multiclass char, what happens with the strongholds? Do you get two?

 

[Crooked Bee]

Wonderful. So what are the chances of finishing this before the end of 2010?

 

[Malakal]

Halberds are piercing? LOL

 

[MicoSelva]

on Thursday.

Is that ITS-speak?

No.

since I've never played bg2 with a multiclass char, what happens with the strongholds? Do you get two?

The one time I played a multiclass char in BG2 - incidentally it was a fighter/mage/thief - I got only the fighter's stronghold. Maybe because I've done that quest as first of the three.

Wonderful. So what are the chances of finishing this before the end of 2010?

Unless I'm very mistaken at what's left to play through, I'd say about 90%

 

[taplonaplo]

You should get the ring of wizardry and cloak of balduran (+25% MR) ASAP.

Also, halberd of backstabbing won't work, but staff of backstabbing will. You can backstab with weapons that a thief can use.

 

[MicoSelva]

Wonderful. So what are the chances of finishing this before the end of 2010?

Unless I'm very mistaken at what's left to play through, I'd say about 90%

I might have underestimated Christmas' ability in absorbing time. The above mentioned percentage is much lower now.

That said, expect an update today.

 

[Malakal]

Wonderful. So what are the chances of finishing this before the end of 2010?

Unless I'm very mistaken at what's left to play through, I'd say about 90%

I might have underestimated Christmas' ability in absorbing time. The above mentioned percentage is much lower now.

That said, expect an update today.

yayifications

 

[MicoSelva]

Update #28: House of Doom & Horrors

Update #28

We start with visiting na inn, because The Codex is in need of a cold shower after the last update.

Just so I don't kill anyone who you might regret.

Accessing the northwestern area from here will place us in the part containing Blushing Mermaid tavern.

Better for everyone if this is the last part of this fucking quest.

Initial stats.

As with Blade & Stars earlier, the spawn point is suspiciously conveniently placed to the tavern. We cast Mirror Image as a precaution before entering.

That qualifies as paranoid behaviour, I think.

Paranoid? Hardly. Just good memory. Inside, we meet Larze.

Fuck you, ogre. Who even let you in here?

We start by an impressive 36 damage critical, but Larze immediately ups the stakes, hitting for 40 with a regular attack.

FUCKSHIT! You're supposed to hit the images!

First attempt to defeat him is a failure.

Death count: 118

Loading.

Well, fuck. He's one tough son of a bitch.

You can say that again.

We try to blind Larze next time, but he resists.

At least he's not "Magic Resistant".

Yeah. Not that it changes anything.

Death count: 119

Reloading.

Do you have any ideas how to defeat him, or are we waiting for some luck to kick in?

Yeah, well, all my ideas assume some amount of luck, to be honest.

And we get it, as Larze is blinded at third attempt.

Now you die!

Even blinded, he still manages to get a large percentage of hits in. We're forced to renew Mirror Image much sooner than expected.

We also try to paralyze Larze with The Codex' wand, but it fails. No, not that wand, which you undoubtedly think about.

Fucking perverts.

Time for EXTREME CHEESE. We leave and hide in shadows.

And we're back with a vengeance. Backstab damage still sucks.

Maybe this dagger is out of charges or something?

Cheesecake inbound. Leaving, casting, hiding.

This backstab damage is really pathetic.

This is fucking annoying!

Give me some sugar cheese, baby

How the mighty have fallen...

Yay, backstab for 22... Fucking incline...

Incline indeed.

Death count: 120

Load game.

Are you half asleep, or something? We need to change the approach to fighting this guy! Start thinking!

Thinking is overrated.

We paralyze Larze. This time it works.

Now, this is what I call !

After that the combat changes into a woodcutter's work. Chop, chop, chop...

Geezfuck, how many hitpoints did this guy have!?

Yeah, a lot. At the rate it was going, we would've been backstabbing him for three days in a row.

He drops another set of Gauntlets of Weapon Skill and some treasure.

Trying to intimidate me after I fought the ogre downstairs? Hard time.

FUUUUUUUUUUCK!

We did some really impressive critical hit damage there, but Marek goes all Palpatine on The Codex. Fortunately, our hero survives.

Anoter sword-slash is enough to put the assassin down.

How's you creed now, huh!?

Killing Marek finishes the 'poisoned party' quest. Actually, the end is triggered if he's killed after giving the geas removal scroll to Lothander. If you kill Marek in the brief moment when you meet him for the first time, you're fucked, as the poison quest is initiated and there's no way of finishing it.
Marek drops some nice stuff too.

This potion of antidote may look like regular one from afar, but it actually contains 10 charges of antidote. It will replace the regular antidotes we're carrying.

By the way, my slow poison ability turned out to be fucking useless.

Yes. The'evil' power equivalent of Slow Poison is the much more useful Horror, so it seems it would've been worth the trouble to lower The Codex' reputation after getting Cure Light Wounds, and get the 'evil' ability instead of the 'good' one. I might yet cheat a bit and adjust that with ShadowKeeper before we start BG2. But in this game, we will go with what we got.

Eagle Bow is the best short bow in the game, and also the best ranged weapon for thieves not mixed with fighter. Too bad it's found so late in the game, making thieves suck as archers for the majority of time. Even short bows +1 aren't a very common view, while two best long bows are gotten relatively early (composite +1 can be bought in Beregost and Bow of Marksmanship is found in bandit camp). That's why I went with long bows for this playthrough.
This proficiency might also get adjusted with ShadowKeeper, since in BG2 the best bows for solo play are in the 'short' category (they don't require carrying ammunition, for which we won't have backpack space).

Dagger +2. Will be sold.

Fighting Larze and Marek was tiring, so we rest before moving on.

There are some lootable houses here. Well, at least one.

Cloak of protection. More gold for us.

More gold. You know, you try carrying 55 000 gold coins with you one day. Do you know how heavy they are?

They have no weight, so stop whining.

I have almost forgotten something very important - back to Blushing Mermaid we go. There's an entrance to Undercellar here.

What's the Undercellar?

It's an exclusive whorehouse, mostly for nobles.

OMG ITZ HEAVAN!

But we're not here for pleasure. We've come to find this girl, Quenash, and put our hands on her possessions.

How is that not pleasure?

You were supposed to steal from her, not grab her ass!

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Loading game.

Drinking this potion will ensure The Codex doesn't get distracted by Quenash' shapely body again.

Success!

So... What have I stolen exactly?

This.

Oh fuck yeah!

Equipping the cloak gives us a total +4 (actually: -4) bonus to saving throws, putting them into some really reasonable values.
Also, AC drops to -3 (-6 against piercing and -11 against missile weapons).

Brielbara here gives a quest involving Yago, a mage we passed in Low Lantern, remember?

No.

Accidentally, we stumble upon Narlen Darkwalk - the thieves' guild quest giver. The first job is simple - we're supposed to stay behind and watch for the guards.

I'll take any opportunity to mess with the Flaming Fist. Bring them on!

'Make fer the dark'? WTF is this shit? I don't speak like that!

Maybe you just got too excited? Check your underwear.

We ditch the guards using the foolproof approach of going around the corner and hiding in shadows.

There's some inn here I don't remember from my earlier playthroughs.

That probably means we shouldn't even bother entering it.

Unopenable chest - interesting.

Yes. Fascinating.

That's weird. I'm experiencing a deja vu.

Yes. Fascinating.

Ok, seriously, mustard jelly was not in my top 100 things expected to be found here.

The times these things were a threat are long gone now.

Area completed!

This "area" takes less than half of available space. What a ripoff!

There's one more thing to get before we continue the plot thingy. It's located here.

There are a few points of interest in this area.

This is the guy giving us the quest to find Nester's dagger.

Oh yeah that. What exactly have we done with it?

No idea.

Fuck it then.

There's a potion of magic blocking, or similar, upstairs in a chest.

Also, a long bow +1. Grabbing it requires hiding from Flaming Fist, as the sleeping guy calls guards.

Where's the realism when we need it?

Next house.

Healing potion. Nice.

This is our actual target here - Helm & Cloak inn.

An adventuring party (Merry Fools), led by Gorpel Hind, is drinking here. Talking to them triggers a script in which another group of adventurers - Maulers of Undermountain - enters the inn. They're rather hostile and fight is bound to ensue. One of the maulers drops the best battle axe in the vanilla game, but, since this is a non-essential encounter and we don't want to unnecessarily extend our visit in the city, we're going to ignore Gorpel Hind and his boys.

Merry Fools, Maulers of Undermountain. I should also name my party in some awesome way.

What party?

Oh yeah, that.

There's a secret stash behind the painting upstairs. It's also trapped.

I wonder what we will find inside, considering the inn is called Helm & Cloak, and we already have the cloak.

Oh, look, a helm! Who would've guessed!?

Entering another house.

This one certainly has a higher profile than the previous ones.

Holy shit! Battle horror!

Doom Guard.

Yeah, that!

There's also a Helmed Horror there by the table.

Yeah, whatever the fuck that is.

Remember the house I warned You about at the end of previous update?

This is the one?

This is the one.

Mirror Image is a must here. Not sure if it will suffice. Probably not.

It seems that besides the two enemies visible from the start, there were also three Invisible Stalkers here (Shadow of Chernobyl, Clear Sky and Call of Pripyat). The Codex suddenly became vastly outnumbered. And I don't mean DA2-combat-walkthrough-like 'vastly outnumbered'.

They hack away The Codex' HP at a disturbing rate, so we try to even the odds a bit by casting Hold Person.

Don't move! Please?

It doesn't work. Next up is Web. Spider's Bane should give us an advantage here, as The Codex cannot be paralyzed by the spell.

Two of four enemies in range are held, but the remaining two still outmatch our hero. The situation looks dire.

Apparently, I entered the wrong door. Can I please leave now?

We try to save ourselves with another Mirror Image.

But that only postpones the inevitable.

Death count: 121

Loading game.

I'm thinking this encounter might prove problematic.

My keen precognition senses say You are right.

We shall enter pre-mirrorimaged from now on.

"From now on"? How many more times will we be entering that house?

Some questions must remain unanswered until suitable time comes.

For some reason I decide this defense spot to be better than the previous one. We get hacked at even before The Codex is able to cast Web.

Mirror Image must be refreshed rather quickly.

This doesn't look good.

The defense spot was indeed not better than the last one.

Death count: 122

Loading.

Do you know how much does getting stabbed with a sword hurt?

Well, no.

Why don't you get closer, so I can show you? That would quickly teach you how to excerise the most cautious tactics available.

This time we enter pre-hidden too, so The Codex doesn't get gangraped from the beginning.

We find a lone Helmed Horror in one of the backrooms.

Hi there...

Let me narrate for a moment: we rape it with a really big sword, and very brutally!

The horror also gets a couple of hits in. These guys are dangerous even one on one.

After some healing, we take on a lone Doom Guard. First attack must be done from afar, as there's another enemy (the Doom Guard we've been fighting before) standing near it.

HURTS!? I HOPE IT DOES!

Surprise attack + Mirror Image = victory. But again, not without The Codex getting hit.

The second Doom Guard can be attacked with a backstab first, which is good news, but we're out of Mirror Image and low on HP, which is bad news.

Fuuuck! Retreat!

Essentially, we're fucked. Unless this spell works, The Codex doesn't stand a chance of surviving this fight.

Death, here I come.

It doesn't. I forgot to take the death screenshot here, but I think such proof is unnecessary, considering the situation visible in the one above.

Death count: 123

Reloading.

I would like to postpone fighting the other Doom Guard until after I heal myself and/or am able to cast Mirror Image again.

Alright, alright.

We meet the owner of the house.

You know what, your household staff sucks!

If we struck a deal with him, he would've given us a quest that would result in getting helm and cloak of Balduran in a very convoluted way. In all my playthroughs, I've never gone all the way with it.

Degrodel and The Codex don't get along very well.

Why don't we step outside and resolve it like men?

But Degrodel does not know meaning of the phrase "fair fight" and calls his dad, mom and retarded siblings for help (one Invisible Stalker is, well, invisible).

OW! Get away from me you fucktards!

Not good.

Death count: 124

Load game.

This Degrodel guy is fucking annoying.

Back to backstabbing (shitty accidental pun) the Doom Guard. Damage still sucks ass. Theoretically it should be in the 21-30 range (1d4+2 +4 = 7 to 10, x3). Unless strength bonus doesn't get trippled here, then it would be 13 to 22 (9 to 18, +4). Results seem to indicate the latter, but I'm sure we've dealt more backstab damage already.

Yeah, we did. On a critical hit, you moron.

Oooooooh...

I'm not sure why I thought we could win this time, but not much has changed since the previous try. Casting Hold Person here is a desperate last resort.

Unsurprisingly, it doesn't work.

Farewell, everyone.

I'm beginning to think that we should come here better prepared.

Death count: 125

Loading.

Any other suggestions as brilliant as "backstab the doomguard"?

Yeah, a few.

Death count: 126

Death count: 127

Death count: 128

Death count: 129

Ok, that's enough for now.

YOU THINK!?

We will be back.

For now, we settle for some house-looting.

More stuff to sell.

Another house.

The quest to steal Algernon's cloak is given by Pheirkas here.

I don't get it. We were actually expected to give away some of the best magical items in the game as parts of various fetch quests? Who thought this would be a good idea?

Scrolls found easily like this are most likely cursed, but maybe we'll be lucky.

I'm omitting Etnar Silvershield's estate, as there was nothing interesting in there, save for Skie, who we didn't even talk to.

Yet another high profile house.

That doesn't bode well.

No Doom Guards this time. Just a magic potion.

Back to the House of Doom (Guards) and (Helmed) Horrors. Another try for the lone one. This time we're smart and paralyze it with a wand.

It's quite the lesser threat when paralyzed. Even our hero is able to defeat it this time.

Fucking r00fles.

Making a move at the Helmed Horror.

Not that kind of move. Just saying.

We manage to paralyze it, but attacking from this point makes us a target for Invisible Stalkers.

I don't see any invisi... Ah. Right.

The Codex retreats into a corner, in search of a better defense spot. Shadow of Chernobyl follows and strikes hard.

Will Web be enough to stop it and its invisible friends?

Nope.

Death count: 130

Load game.

Weren't we supposed to get back here after resting, or something?

Yeah, but I got this idea and...

I'm having an idea right now. It involves my sword and your anus. Want to know the details?

Shadows will assist us in our next attempt to resolve this situation.

Starting with Fireball.

Careful where you aim that!

Stalkers and Helmed Horror are drawn to our hero like moths to a lamplight.

Three Invisible Stalkers and one Helmed Horror. Will Web be enough to stop them?

I'm experiencing a deja vu.

It works rather well. We manage to kill Shadow of Chernobyl and the Helmed Horror. Clear Sky and Call of Pripyat are paralyzed by the Web.

Yes!

Clear Sky kicks the bucket!

YES!

And Call of Pripyat also croaks!

Back to Helm & Cloak to rest before we take on the mage.

I still can't believe we managed to kill all those fuckers without resting.

Resting means renewed ability to identify items.

This helm kicks ass!

Not by itself, but it shall help us perform this noble activity.

No AC change, as Helm of Glory also gave us a +1 bonus. Saving throws are improved, however - and pretty awesome. Even the worst one (Breath Weapon) gives us 65% chance of resisting the attack.

I am awesome. Yes.

Preparing for the "conversation" with Degrodel.

"Us" and "We". Am I getting megalomaniacal here?

"Getting"?

The Codex hides in the corner and bombards the room with Web and Fireball.

This should make them thinking. I think.

We manage to slay the Helmed Horror. Four to go.

Looks promising so far!

False promises, they were.

Death count: 131

Loading.

Well, that did not turn out so good.

Degrodel and his Melf's Acid Arrow are a major pain in the ass here, so we try to eliminate him with Hold Person.

It doesn't work, but we get lucky and he gets tangled in the Web.

A nicely placed Fireball. Im getting quite good at aiming these. Magic Resistance helps in the moments when I make mistakes.

Don't get so full of tourself just because you managed not to kill me too.

Doom Guard falls!

YES!

Degrodel is still an issue here, so we try to Magic Missile him to the other side.

Let's not fuck this up this time!

We fucked this up. Well, actually no. The webbed enemies just made their saves and killed our hero.

Death count: 132

Loading the game.

Alright, I have an idea.

I'm all ears.

Fuck the mage. I mean, seriously. Screw him. Does he even drop anything useful?

No idea. Don't remember.

Exactly. And you would have remembered if he did. We also have both the helm and cloak of Balduran. We have no sound reason to fight the fucker, so let's not.

What about the audience and their expectations?

I think they expect some progress to be made in this update. Or am I wrong?

Uh... Yes, the plot thingy. I completely forgot about that. Yes. I think, we may move on.

(Note: Actually, I've tried to defeat Degrodel - unsuccessfully - about ten more times, but none of these attempts produced a viable set of screenshots, mostly due to my growing level of frustration and fast clicking on 'load game' when something went wrong. One time, we managed to kill all Degrodel, both Doom Guards and Helmed Horror, but got one-shot by the Invisible Stalker after that. That was... not cool.)

Area completed!

The final area of the city awaits!

To be honest, I'm getting a bit paranoid when it comes to entering houses in this city.

Not another fucking mage! They're like a plague here! Worse than paladins! Almost.

Help! Don't want to die! Don't want to die!

I was bragging about The Codex' saving throws earlier. Yeah...

Our hero runs out of Sunin's sight range when panicked. Mage doesn't follow. The wounds visible in the screenshot are from Melf's Acid Arrow. Horror eventually wears off.

Payback time!

Now that I know this is the maximum non-critical backstab damage, there's nothing left to complain about. Except maybe: NO POISON!

Doesn't matter.

The fucker dies.

Two arrows of frost (Arrows of ice? Ice arrows? Frost arrows? Whatever.) are enough.

The loot.

Sunin drops another Ring of Wizardry. Probably, we won't be using it, as AC and saving throws bonus given by the +2 Ring of Protection are too precious for us.

Altough the quadrupled amunt of 1st level spells would be pretty sweet too.

Another house....

...that turns out to be an inn. Some paladin (named Phalandyn, next we'll meet a mage named Mhang) lets The Codex go "unmolested".

That's... rather creepy. Yet another reason to get rid of the paladin blight.

This is an inn too. Not sure how are we supposed to know that, though.

The inn is infested by green slimes!

What.

They're no match for The Codex' might!

Green slimes. That's almost worse than paladins. Whatever happens, I'm not eating or sleeping here.

Yet another house. Paranoia kicking in again...

And it might yet be justified...

It's just one woman. What's the worst that could happen?

Borda.

Oh.

(On a side note: it's one of the rare instances I like the dialogue options available, especially the highlighted one.)

I'm not giving you my money. I've been gathering it for almost a year!

She wasn't kidding about the invisible friends.

More bodies to loot!

Mirror Image is a must here, especially that Wiven cast hers immediately.

Web should make them a little less capable of fighting back.

The fight is not going very well. The Codex got hurt pretty badly and is force to renew Mirror Image already. All the enemies are still alive.

You're not getting me that easily!

Wiven dies. We're taking a bit of a risk here, since grabbing the bow deprives us of Freedom of Movement and The Codex might get tangled up in our own Web.

We test Meakin for swordproofness. He fails. Another thief, earlier hidden in the fog of war, comes into sight range.

Die, thieving scum!

I probably should have healed The Codex a bit during the fight. Oh well.

Death count: 133

Loading.

Have you noticed how I'm dying a lot recently?

Well, your faster experience gain edge has worn off by now. Encounters here are set for six characters at your experience level.

We enter pre-imaged this time.

Web worked quite well before, so there's no reason not to cast it.

Killing off Wiven's mirror images with Magic Missile.

She dies a few moments later.

Meakin soon follows.

As does Sath.

I make a mistake and switch weapon to a bow. The Codex gets held by the Web and the last guy, Dirk, almost kills him. As soon as our hero is able to move again, we cast Mirror Image to ensure survival.

Two hits are enough to slay Dirk.

Looting. Most of them drop magic arrows of various types.

Except Wiven, that is.

Yet another house to loot.

Geez! How many of these are left? It got old like fifty houses ago!

And we're only showing one in three, maybe four. Fortunately, this is the last one.

Really?

Yup. Only plot locations are left. No more roaming around the city and getting our asses kicked in random places.

Fuck, yes!

Now we will only get our assess kicked in pre-defined places.

I can live with that.

As for the loot inside - free healing potions for the win.

Entering Flaming Fist HQ.

Nothing interesting on the ground floor.

Duke Eltan has some nice items in his chests here. Nothing gamebreaking, but hey, free stuff is free stuff.

A splint mail +1. These are a rare view.

Finally - duke Eltan himself. But before we talk to him...
------------------------------------

Next time: Back to the keep that keeps the candles.

 

[Johannes]

Why do you bother carrying normal arrows btw? With all that gathered money you could easily stick to the decent/good stuff only, and use some buff potions and such too to cut the death rate a bit.

 

[taplonaplo]

Ring of wizardry 8 free magic missiles/rest and after you cast them all you can reequip the ring of prot+2 too.

BTW I probably would have tried potion of absortion + wand of lightning in the house of Doom and Horror myself.

 

[Malakal]

He is a typical player ie never uses potions or buys good items, instead hoards thousands and thousands of gold needlessly and reloads a lot. Well I ended ToB with more than 500k of gold so perhaps I am not one to say...

 

[MicoSelva]

He is a typical player ie never uses potions or buys good items, instead hoards thousands and thousands of gold needlessly and reloads a lot.

Yeah, this. I learned to play this way, and however I try to fight the bad habits, they end up winning. I'm also very impatient and just have to try another tactic I just conjured up right away (and five times in a row), instead of thinking oustide the box and going back for optimal equipment.
Actually, I'm using many times more potions and wands than I've used when playing all non-LP games before. I'll try to improve even more for BG2.

I probably would have tried potion of absortion + wand of lightning in the house of Doom and Horror myself.

Good idea, which has never come to my mind (although I have used wands [fire, paralyzation] in the off-screen tries). There were other foolproof ways of winning this too. The Codex' damage output was not the problem, I only needed to ensure surviving. Wand of summon monster would've helped the most, giving more targets for the enemies' to attack. I gave up partly to get opportunity to insert the 'you know what, fuck this shit' joke.

Why do you bother carrying normal arrows btw?

I'm switching to magical arrows whenever the damage done by normal ones isn't enough. I guess I could've given them up at all - another idea that has never occured to me.

Thanks for the hints.

 

[Crooked Bee]

Awesome.

And the death count ... pleases me greatly. :twisted:

 

[Orgasm]

What the fuck? You are giving up on the interesting fights (tavern party and house of doom) and instead show how to loot empty houses?
I want to see them dead! Less cheese or more cheese, doesnt matter. Dead I say!

 

[ironyuri]

What the fuck? You are giving up on the interesting fights (tavern party and house of doom) and instead show how to loot empty houses?
I want to see them dead! Less cheese or more cheese, doesnt matter. Dead I say!

Yes. I demand that you slaughter the Underdwellers of Merry Slaughtermount!

 

[MicoSelva]

Ok, I'll go back to house of doom and helm & cloak before the endgame (in update #31), unleashing all spare consumables on Maulers and Degrodel.
Candlekeep is finished by the way - I decided to split it into two updates.

If there are any other places You would like The Codex to visit before the endgame, this is the time to speak. After update #29 is posted, we'll have passed the point of no return.

 

[taplonaplo]

i would say to loot the duchal palace without the invitation, but i guess we are too late for that . Gotta love the backdoor entrance.

 

[desocupado]

Your LP is awesome, please continue with the good work.

Do you plan on tacking Throne of Baal?

 

[MicoSelva]

i would say to loot the duchal palace without the invitation, but i guess we are too late for that . Gotta love the backdoor entrance.

Wouldn't that screw up the ability to finish the game in Chapter #7?

Do you plan on tacking Throne of Baal?

I'm planning to finish both BG2 and ToB (with Ascension) or die trying. Or rather and die trying. Many times.
But, probably, I won't be starting the second game right away. I need some kind of a break from BG (currently overdosed), at least long enough to finish Alpha Protocol or maybe Amnesia.

 

[Yeesh]

 

[Malakal]

Remember to play BG2 with 'solo with a party' mod for greater enjoyment and lulzy encounters. Also use lulzy companion mods (hope they work with 'solo with a party').

 

[MicoSelva]

Never heard of that mod. What does it do?
(Sorcerer's Place is blocked from where I'm posting right now).

edit: Ok, nevermind, read about it already. It's quite interesting, but I don't think I will be installing it. Thanks for the recommendation anyway.

 

[MicoSelva]

Last time on on Star Trek Baldur's Gate IS.

No, not this!

Yes, this.

Update #29: Home, Sweet Home

Update #29

Finally - duke Eltan himself. But before we talk to him, we've got some equipment management to perform.

First things first - area completed!

We empty our stash in FAI, selling some stuff and moving the rest to the stash in thieves' guild. Yes, I know I haven't used and probably won't use most of these items. I just can't help it.

My name is Mico Selva, and I am a shameless hoarder.

Thank you for sharing with us, now GTFO!

Resting.

We also sell stuff outsidereality.eu left on top of Iron Throne tower.

And back to Duke Eltan. At first he's all mysterious and ambiguous. So we're not sure if he can be trusted.

Like hell, we're not.

Eventually, he gives us the quest to infiltrate the Iron Throne.

Heads up, gramps. Your errand boy met me leaving their tower. Conclusions? No?

We talk to him again immediately.

Done your job already. Surprised, huh? Where's my 2000 gold, plus bonus for speedy service?

He gives us the book needed to enter Candlekeep.
Side note: stealing the book from him doesn't grant access there.

Stupid railroad plot.

We've entered Chapter Six.

Cool. This means new Awesome Divine Powahs for me!

We get insta-teleported to Candlekeep.

Whoa! Trippy.

Ready to get back to the place of origin?

I'm not sure. Remember what happened outsidereality.eu? What if I die of excitement?

Good. I have twenty more characters willing to replace you. Including some hot babes.

Right. Hey, good thing we've explored the place wholly last time. That will save us a lot of time now. Right?

Well, no.

Fuck!

This is the book we got from Eltan. Not that it matters.

And since it doesn't - screw it and let's move on!

Once entered, Candlekeep cannot be left to resupply, so we'll have to make it with what we currently have on us (and find inside the keep). I got rid of the (useless, really) wands of ice and instead brought a wand of lightning.

Are these boots of speed? Since when are we using them?

Since we've got a lot of pointless running to do.

We should be using them since forever then.

Sure thing, pal. I won't be breaking any laws inside. No killing of random merchants, or stuff like that. Promise.

We loot the hospital on the way.

That's just fucking evil.

Hey, free potions!

What about "evil"?

They can always buy more. With a discount, no doubt.

Candlekeep inn. Sure brings back memories.

I hope you're not referring to memories about the event that never happened.

Do You mean, when Firebeard Elvenhair...

NEVER. HAPPENED.

We find some useless spells. Can't even sell them here.

A potion of clarity.

That kind of brings back memories. First successful hide check!

And we only had to kick-start it, like, seven times.

The best thing we find here is a diamond, which we can sell for reasonable money.

Which we don't need.

True.

I wonder what was in this chest at the start of the game.

We might never find out.

Hey, I remember this place! I kicked my first ass in there.

Priest doing creepy stuff to a cat? What, have you run out of little boys?

Geez, I know it's a touchy subject, but this is one serious overreaction.

Oh, it's a doped gangbanger. Of course. I knew that.

Got scratched by the doppleganger = resting.

I'm not sure. There are pod people doped gangbangers here. What if I get replaced while sleeping?

Good, maybe the duplicate will be more bearable.

Fuck you!

Area completed!

Entering.

There are many spell scrolls here to loot, but I think we already have all, or at least most of them. I will show only the ones we take with us. This is not one of them.

But you're showing it.

There are also fluff scrolls with the backstory of Bhaal, the god of murder.

Subtle.

Most people here are readers. There's really a lot of them.

More than this LP has for sure.

Web is coming with us (at least I think I took it).

We meet this guy, who is totally not Sarevok.

Huh? Sarevok? Where?

Here. You're talking to him.

He's named Koveras. He he, like "cover us". Funny shit.

That's Sarevok spelled backwards, ffs!

Must be a coincidence. Besides, I'm sure he wouldn't be using an alias that obvious. He has like 17 intelligence, right?

Yes. Wait. How do you know that? Anyway, Koveras tries to give The Codex a Ring of Protection +1.

I stopped using junk like this ages ago. Besides, I'm a little short on storage space right now, so: no.

Coverus crumbles under The Codex' cunning inquiries.

He does?

He leaves right after that. We send an arrow after him, but without any effect.

Dear audience, don't take this situation as an example of correct behaviour. Shooting people who give you free stuff is generally a bad idea. Unless the free stuff is supposed to be candy, but in reality...

Commercial break!

Not sure if we took this...

You do remember shit from ages ago, but not what happened a few days before? You know that this is a symptom of dementia?

Also not sure if we took this.

Will you stop that!

Hm. I don't know...

We reach the room with Iron Throne management.

Now they die!

You do know we don't have to kill them?

Yeah. But we can, right?

Well, yes.

Now they die!

Not taking any unnese... unnecesa... Fuck, how do you spell this? Where's the google.

Dementia. Definitely.

Not taking any unnecessary risk - Mirror Image goes up from the start.

DIE BITCHES! HAHAHAHAHA!

Dialogue: the abridged version.

Rieltar has a point here.

Dead men are wrong by default!

Notice the movement spot inside the room. It was probably a mistake to click The Codex to move that close.

Definitely a mistake. Before I'm able to pause the game, our hero moves very near to enemies.

Fuck you, reflexes-impared dumbfuck!

Another mistake - The Codex wields the bow, getting a penalty to his AC and immediately gets hit for half of his HP. I try to salvage the situation with Web.

Someday, I will salvage bone marrow from your corpse!

The situation looks bad.

Looks bad but actually is fucking horrible!

Side note: Rieltar is not in the screenshot because he turned invisible.

Web works quite well.

Come on, Spider's Bane, we'll show them who rules these lands!

I think that was Rieltar with some deadly spell, but we may never know for sure.

Death count: 134

Loading.

Lucky wimps. I will mop the floor with them!

Another try. This time The Codex doesn't run into the crowded room like a suicide bomber, but instead assumes a tactical spot near the door. Not sure if I forgot Mirror Image, or if the images are already used up at this point.

I'm pretty sure which of these events occured. Call it a hunch.

Anyway, we've got that covered.

IT BURNS US!

Either Rieltar is one lucky guy or Agannazar's Scorcher ignores Mirror Image, as The Codex gets quite heated up. Brunos also gets his share.

Like fire? Two can play that game!

Tuth is toast. Three to go.

Brunos has a bad moment here, receiving a critical hit from The Codex and another Agannazar's Scorcher from Rieltar, who is a real dick and doesn't care if he accidentally hits his buddies. Also: Mirror Image works on the scorcher after all.

Yeah, about that. I'm all for refreshing mirror image. Like, now.

Sorry, we're out.

Rieltar saves us a lot of trouble, managing to kill both Kestor and Brunos. The Codex doesn't die because of his magic resistance!

Whew!

Boom! Spleenshot! And don't fucking get up!

Victory!

That was way too close.

Since this combat is optional, none of these guys drops anything unique. Just generic +1 stuff.

And some potions. I won't show the rest of the spoils, as it would be pointless.

We find a scroll of Identify in the room outsidereality.eu occupied by Iron Throne.

One of the readers got hit by some spell - probably Rieltar's Lightning Bolt.

Sucks to be him. Let's move on.

I am fucking innocent! Honest! All the fifty witnesses are lying their asses off!

For some reason they don't believe The Codex and lock him up.

Rieltar and Brunos? What about the other two? Uh...

Tuth and Kestor.

Yeah, these guys! You don't give a fuck about them? Besides, they all mostly burned themselves up by careless spellcasting.

How can I be an agent of Amn if I don't even know how to pronounce it?

Of course, the railroad plot follows, and we get busted out by Gorion's old friend, Tehtoril (who has a really badass voice in Polish version of the game, but here sounds like and old geezer - I am disappoint).

He thinks I didn't kill those guys. How cute.

"Ulraunt's wrath?"

And we're teleported to the secret library.

I bet this is where the monks keep all their porn. I should carefully search every corner of the room.

We find no porn...

Officially.

...but there are a lot of spell scrolls here. We take most of them.

That's the second Knock scroll we find in short time. I guess the developers really didn't want me to miss the stuff we'll soon find.

Combat spells - never too much of these.

We take these too.

Rested and ready to go!

Fuck yeah, bring it on!

Trap detection is a must here. Hiding is optional, but won't hurt.

We meet Phlydia.

Who?

The woman, for whom... Oh, right, we skipped all this.

I can assure you I did no such thing. Yaoi is outside my scope of interest.

Oh, she's another gangbanger. I knew that, of course.

This doppleganger sounds like a male...

Oh fuck.

Don't touch me, fucking tranny! DIE!

These guys have some ridiculous THAC0 - every fight with them ends with a lot hits received, especially since I have issues with casting Mirror Image against single enemies. Fortunately, their HP is far from impressive.

I'm always curious what kind of trap we detect. Is it a spell? A poison arrow? A summon? There's only one way to find out...

DON'T! Even. Think about it.

A fuckload of traps here. And they're quite difficult to disarm too.

Good thing I am awesome enough that they're not a problem.

The sarcophagus is trapped too.

But the contents are well worth the effort.

Fuck yes!

We get another manual of Bodily Health.

Uh... Looks more like Tome of Understanding to me.

Fuck. Wrong screenshot.

Here. Fixed.

I'm sensing some kind of scam.

Ok. Honestly: which one do you prefer?

Manual of Bodily Health it is.

We also found this not-bad ring for which we don't have a free item slot.

How is it exactly I only have two fingers in total? Shouldn't I be able to wear at least six rings, like in later Might & Magic games?

There's a "justification" in the game manual, but it's so lame I won't even quote it.

Yeah, let's not increase the level of lameness here. It's already off the scale.

We read the manual immediately.

The Codex' stats are now like as should be at this point - if I haven't fucked up character creation (except he should be a half-elf and now have 19DEX/19CON, but whatever).
HP = 68 includes the +5 bonus from Helm of Balduran.

Moar traps.

Almost like t-rapes, lol.

What the fuck? A dead end?

Looks like it.

Why was it trapped then?

I don't know. So you get pissed off?

It fucking worked!

Next sarcophagus chamber is also trapped, of course.

As is the sarcophagus itself.

More like "sarcophagot", amirite?

Some high-end potions, which we don't take (if I remember correctly), due to lack of backpack space (not even mentioning the sellable-only loot, like the necklace). We do, however, take the scroll of Protection from Magic (or whatever it's called).

Trappy traps.

Geez, this is getting old.

Nothing here.

WHAT!? All the trap disarming for nothing!? Fucking waste of time.

Another corridoor - of course, also trapped.

My spider sense is tingling...

I knew it. Can we get back to traps? I think I preferred them after all.

Due to improved saving throws, The Codex is not as likely to get poisoned as he was before, so I risk killing the spider without any buffs like Mirror Image - only the scroll of Melf's Acid Arrow. We win.

Spiders rarely occur alone, and the one we killed was no exception.

We use the scroll of Lightning Bolt on the spider. Another one is hit off-screen.

Oh fuck! It's back!

I knew there was a reason I've always preferred Firball.

Spiders die.

I'm a little careless and we walk into a trap. Luckily, it's just Web.

Here, spidey-spidey!

We cast two chromatic orbs on the spider, but he only suffers the damage, no status effect. Not even sure what it should be at mage level 6.

Some help here!? I'm fucking dying!

Oh, stop whining, you'll be ok.

There's a reason we're using a sword called Spider's Bane.

Yet another trap.

And the tomb itself is also trapped.

Good thing I am awesome at disarming them.

Yeah, this almost compensates for hide in shadows failing all the fucking time.

And we've hit the jackpot.

Oh boy, oh boy!

A rather awesome cloak, which might come in handy if we want to use the second Ring of Wizardry and are willing to give up the Cloak of Balduran's magic resistance.

And the moment we've all been waiting for.

I certainly was!

Additional +1 to hit and +3 damage in melee will surely come in handy. Weight allowance has almost doubled from 280 to 500.

We have almost all the good loot to be found here, but there still are some rooms to explore. They have mostly ghasts inside.

We're a bit low on HP, so we employ some of the scrolls found earlier - like Web.

It doesn't help.

I fucking hate ghasts!

At least You've made all the possible saving throws here.

Ghast dies is unundeaded.

But wait, there's more!

Fucking great.

This time Web does what it should be doing.

The vile undead is defeated without problems.

Moving on.

Shit! Another one!

This time we can't risk getting hit even once. Mirror Image is perfect for such situations.

Another one bites the dust.

Freddie's mustache is fucking hilarious.

Hurrying up to take advantage of the Mirror Image while it lasts.

Ghasts aren't very durable when hacked at. Making sure you don't get hit is the key.

You can say that basically about every enemy.

Should have used Fireball here to speed things up, but completely forgot that we have it prepared.

You're more hopeless than fucking Guy Pearce in Memento!

Ghasts fall. Not sure how The Codex got the status effect without receiving damage too, but all the better for us.

Maybe it's the "breath weapon" I was saving against earlier.

Fuck, how many more are there?

Uh, three?

That was a rhetorical question, dumbass.

As Russians use to say - kein problem.

Who or what are "russians"?

There'a treasure stash here. The most interesting find is the Wand of Fire. Magic hammer is of a standard +1 variety.

Area completed!
--------------------------------

Next time: The Codex gets gangbanged a lot.

Oh shit.

 

[taplonaplo]

Lum the mad will make your stats useful again... eventually
So 2 updates are left i assume? Will you finish it before 2011?