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Completed Let's solo Baldur's Gate on Insane (feat. The Codex)
- Thread starter MicoSelva
- Start date
Trash
Pointing and laughing.
Man, I loved this game back in the day. Good luck soloing it.
Update #3 - High Hedge
The Codex wants us to sell some stuff that we carry around, so we head to the nearest area containing a store - High Hedge.
The Codex' stats so far.
It seems that we killed a wolf, and 15 gibberlings so far in this chapter.
They were all diseased anyway.
The journey was tiring, so we start with a quick 16-hour rest, after which we start roaming the forest.
Almost immediately, we are greated by a representative of local wildlife:
A cave bear? More like a mountain of slow moving XP. Just gotta keep ahead of him, and shoot arrows.
This tactics seems to be working. Bears in this game really are slow as fuck.
Cave bear is down, netting us sweet 650 XP, but excitement makes us fail a spot check and miss a wolf behind The Codex' back. The wolf has a surprise sex offer for our hero.
The fuck? Getoffme!
The Codex does not swing that way - except the sword swinging of course.
Gods of dumb luck are on our side and The Codex manages to kill the wolf, while still standing.
Whew. That was close.
Wow, I didn't know You had so much blood. Isn't it supposed to stay inside the body?
Let's rest a while here, ok?
After the rest, we move on, soon encountering more enemies.
I see dead people!
They're more like, You know, undead.
Not for long, they're not!
Boom! Skullshot!
Come on, let's dance the dance of death!
Yeah, baby! Sword and me rule this stage!
Skeletons apparently learned their tactics from diseased gibberlings, hence they don't stand a chance against The Codex and his mighty Autopause ability.
You are seriously trying to piss me off! You just can't stand when I'm doing good, don't you?
I'm only worried about Your future. Barely anyone is reading this thread anyway. If You don't die often enough, it will decline even further.
That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life!
Okay, You're right. I actually like to see You suffer.
Fuck. You.
Victory!
Finally, enemies that drop some kind of loot. Although, I wouldn't call killing them a get-rich-quick scheme.
Well, get used to fighting skeletons, since this place is loaded with them.
Here's some more:
Not that I mind. They're weak and give reasonable amount of XP... Hey, I have an idea!
Forget it. We're not farming skeletons to help You become slightly less sucky.
Dammit!
Ow! That hurt, you fucker!
Geez, how many more of these things are there?
Told You to get used to them.
FUCK! I'm gonna get you for that!
Better drink some of that blue stuff. It would be stupid to die like this.
It's the bottle that is blue, not the liquid.
Whatever, just drink it.
HA! How do you like me rolling a 20?
The potion was a good idea, because The Codex was hit one more time in this fight. Fortunately, not severely enough to die.
I still think skeletons suck ass. Those were just three lucky rolls.
We rest to heal.
Justaminute, it's nighttime. Wouldn't it be reasonable to wait until morning?
What do You care? You're an elf, you've got infravision.
It's not the lack of visibilty, I'm worried about.
What is it then?
How about encountering a pair of giant fucking spiders!
Holy shit.
Poison! Thank god for the cow cure stolen from Candlekeep.
Saved!
You still have 1 HP left. We should retreat.
No! I can do it!
Sure You can...
Death count: 6
We reload.
Let's, uh, try another route, shall we?
Ok.
More free XP!
Actually, I'm starting to wonder where do all these skeletons come from? Do they spontaneously rise up from the ground where adventurers are nearby?
Dunno. I guess, Thalantyr raises them. The guy really likes his privacy, and skeletons roaming the area scare away most people.
What? Really? I'm starting to feel a kind of respect for the guy.
Down! I think that was the last one.
Hopefully, it was also the last pack of skeletons we encountered here.
We continue exploring, soon running into Kivan.
It's standard procedure by now. We join him, take his stuff (free arrows, mostly), and leave him.
Indeed, it is. And no, we shall not.
Moving on.
A giant dogman!
Yeah, gnolls are the second plague that this forest suffers from. They don't give as much XP as sekeletons, but are even easier to kill.
One shot - one kill. That's how you do it, stormtroopers!
Think you can reach melee range?
No, you can't!
Watch out, this one is a veteran.
Veteran, or not, doesn't matter to the sword's blade.
One of the gnolls had a short sword, which is a quest item (Perdue's sword). I forgot to screenshot it.
More gnolls!
Well, these are actually flinds.
What's the difference?
This is the difference.
Fucker! Thank god for healing potions.
Let's hope you are a fast drinker.
Shit, they're stronger than I thought.
Yes, quite a bit.
Death count: 7
We reload.
Ok, I'm in for trying a different approach. I'll hide in shadows and scout the area unseen, so I can have the option not to die a horrible death when meeting something stronger.
We can try.
The Codex' 1337 stealth skillz fail him right just the moment he reaches sight range of a some wild dogs. Luckily, Autopause gives us the (unfair) advantage and allows to equip armour before they attack (meaning, before the game considers the combat initiated).
The dogs bite hard, but killing them makes The Codex level up!
Hell yes!
The Codex reaches second level in thief class.
Level up summary.
As for the unseen skills, hide in shadows will always be equal to move silently and both illusion dispelling and trap setting are ignored (we'll have spells for the first and I'm not a huge fan of the latter - but maybe will bump it up sometime in the future).
The Codex' stats so far. Cave bear is the most powerful foe he's slain. It also looks that, we haven't used any spells so far.
Yeah, I almost forgot I am a mage too.
You're not. Being able to cast one first-level spell per day does not make You a mage. Every paladin would laugh his ass off if You compared your magical abilities.
Point taken. I think I'll stick to the bow and sword for now.
We move on after a rest. We don't make two steps before running into the rest of the wild dog pack.
What? I've just been camping here for, like, 32 hours and these dogs didn't attack me, even though they were there all the time?
Your point being?
Oh, I don't know, maybe, that IT DOESN"T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE! 
Just do Your thing...
Sparing everyone a crapload of identical screenshots involving slashing poor dogs, it suffices to say that we win without a scratch.
Nothing like morning warmup after a good rest.
Let's move on.
Yay, gnolls...
You seem a bit down, what's going on?
I just don't like killing dogs.
Does it include gnolls?
Hell no!
Let's slaughter them, then!
Gnoll fighting, the abridged version: we kill them all.
These guys are seriously weak.
Would You prefer giant spiders?
Hey, I'm level 2 now. A force to be reckoned with.
Yes, level 2 thief. What does it give You in terms of combat abilities?
Uh... 2 more hitpoints? Just shut up, already!
You fucker. You just had to talk about giant spiders, didn't you?
Do you suggest I somehow summoned them by mentioning the subject in a conversation? That doesn't make...
Shut up and help me. I'm not getting killed by these things again.
Taught by our previous experience with the spiders, we employ a slightly more sophisticated tactics than "slash them with a sword and hope for the best". Namely, we spike them with arrows while running arround Thalantyr's house.
Don't mind the forest-rapist NPC that's also pursuing The Codex. He's unimportant, as even the spiders ignored him completely (seriously, what the fuck?).
It takes some time, but the spiders lose HP and we don't.
And that's what counts.
Yes! Eat dirt!
Boom! Headsh-shiiit, it 's still alive.
Yes! Finally!
Saving the game now!
After that, we continue our journey. There'a an abandoned house in the area.
Those chests seriously piss me off!
Stop kicking it already, just accept You're not skilled enough yet.
I will be back!
Soon after leaving the house, we encounter a pack of gnolls.
Easy as pie!
It turns out there are some elites among them. We are forced to use a healing potion.
You owe me 100 GP, hyena cock sucker. Take that!
I know, he pissed You off, but You didn't have to splatter him all over the place.
He'll now think twice before crossing me again.
Right.
Yet another encounter with the gnolls.
No sweat.
I hope that was the last bunch of these guys here. I'm kinda bored with gnolls.
Turns out, it was, as we don't meet any more enemies.
Time to do the thing that we actually came here for - sell some loot.
WANT!
31K gold? It will be a while before we can afford it. And there's no other way to acquire it, since Thalantyr is too badass to steal from.
Guess we better start working on those store discounts.
We are at least able to sell all the excess loot. Thalantyr claims he only deals in magic items, but will actually buy basically any junk we bring him - including stuff like skeleton skulls and such. Yeah, I also think that doesn't make sense.
No High Hedge interior screenshot. Sorry.
Area completed!
---------------------
Next time: We embark on some treasure hunting, ending up as the prey most of the time.
Wait, what?
The Codex' stats so far.
It seems that we killed a wolf, and 15 gibberlings so far in this chapter.
The journey was tiring, so we start with a quick 16-hour rest, after which we start roaming the forest.
Almost immediately, we are greated by a representative of local wildlife:
This tactics seems to be working. Bears in this game really are slow as fuck.
Cave bear is down, netting us sweet 650 XP, but excitement makes us fail a spot check and miss a wolf behind The Codex' back. The wolf has a surprise sex offer for our hero.
The Codex does not swing that way - except the sword swinging of course.
Gods of dumb luck are on our side and The Codex manages to kill the wolf, while still standing.
Wow, I didn't know You had so much blood. Isn't it supposed to stay inside the body?
After the rest, we move on, soon encountering more enemies.
They're more like, You know, undead.
Skeletons apparently learned their tactics from diseased gibberlings, hence they don't stand a chance against The Codex and his mighty Autopause ability.
I'm only worried about Your future. Barely anyone is reading this thread anyway. If You don't die often enough, it will decline even further.
Okay, You're right. I actually like to see You suffer.
Victory!
Well, get used to fighting skeletons, since this place is loaded with them.
Here's some more:
Forget it. We're not farming skeletons to help You become slightly less sucky.
Told You to get used to them.
Better drink some of that blue stuff. It would be stupid to die like this.
Whatever, just drink it.
The potion was a good idea, because The Codex was hit one more time in this fight. Fortunately, not severely enough to die.
We rest to heal.
What do You care? You're an elf, you've got infravision.
What is it then?
Holy shit.
You still have 1 HP left. We should retreat.
Sure You can...
Death count: 6
We reload.
Ok.
Dunno. I guess, Thalantyr raises them. The guy really likes his privacy, and skeletons roaming the area scare away most people.
Hopefully, it was also the last pack of skeletons we encountered here.
We continue exploring, soon running into Kivan.
It's standard procedure by now. We join him, take his stuff (free arrows, mostly), and leave him.
Moving on.
Yeah, gnolls are the second plague that this forest suffers from. They don't give as much XP as sekeletons, but are even easier to kill.
Watch out, this one is a veteran.
One of the gnolls had a short sword, which is a quest item (Perdue's sword). I forgot to screenshot it.
Well, these are actually flinds.
This is the difference.
Let's hope you are a fast drinker.
Yes, quite a bit.
Death count: 7
We reload.
We can try.
The Codex' 1337 stealth skillz fail him right just the moment he reaches sight range of a some wild dogs. Luckily, Autopause gives us the (unfair) advantage and allows to equip armour before they attack (meaning, before the game considers the combat initiated).
The dogs bite hard, but killing them makes The Codex level up!
The Codex reaches second level in thief class.
Level up summary.
As for the unseen skills, hide in shadows will always be equal to move silently and both illusion dispelling and trap setting are ignored (we'll have spells for the first and I'm not a huge fan of the latter - but maybe will bump it up sometime in the future).
The Codex' stats so far. Cave bear is the most powerful foe he's slain. It also looks that, we haven't used any spells so far.
You're not. Being able to cast one first-level spell per day does not make You a mage. Every paladin would laugh his ass off if You compared your magical abilities.
We move on after a rest. We don't make two steps before running into the rest of the wild dog pack.
Your point being?
Just do Your thing...
Sparing everyone a crapload of identical screenshots involving slashing poor dogs, it suffices to say that we win without a scratch.
Let's move on.
Yay, gnolls...
I just don't like killing dogs.
Hell no!
Gnoll fighting, the abridged version: we kill them all.
Would You prefer giant spiders?
Yes, level 2 thief. What does it give You in terms of combat abilities?
Do you suggest I somehow summoned them by mentioning the subject in a conversation? That doesn't make...
Taught by our previous experience with the spiders, we employ a slightly more sophisticated tactics than "slash them with a sword and hope for the best". Namely, we spike them with arrows while running arround Thalantyr's house.
Don't mind the forest-rapist NPC that's also pursuing The Codex. He's unimportant, as even the spiders ignored him completely (seriously, what the fuck?).
It takes some time, but the spiders lose HP and we don't.
Saving the game now!
After that, we continue our journey. There'a an abandoned house in the area.
Stop kicking it already, just accept You're not skilled enough yet.
Soon after leaving the house, we encounter a pack of gnolls.
It turns out there are some elites among them. We are forced to use a healing potion.
I know, he pissed You off, but You didn't have to splatter him all over the place.
Right.
Yet another encounter with the gnolls.
No sweat.
Turns out, it was, as we don't meet any more enemies.
Time to do the thing that we actually came here for - sell some loot.
31K gold? It will be a while before we can afford it. And there's no other way to acquire it, since Thalantyr is too badass to steal from.
We are at least able to sell all the excess loot. Thalantyr claims he only deals in magic items, but will actually buy basically any junk we bring him - including stuff like skeleton skulls and such. Yeah, I also think that doesn't make sense.
No High Hedge interior screenshot. Sorry.
Area completed!
---------------------
Next time: We embark on some treasure hunting, ending up as the prey most of the time.
Last edited:
Murk
Arcane
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2008
- Messages
- 13,459
The reason for the over-powered monster spawns is because you're using BG Tutu which kinda brokeded the spawning system for BG1.
Though really, its just more xp for the reaping baby ;D
Last time I solod as a thief/fighter/mage I found myself falling back on web+composite bow and not even bothering to worry about much else. Once you get the paws of the cheetah (boots of haste) you're pretty much auto-win until you hit some higher level spell casters.
Though really, its just more xp for the reaping baby ;D
Last time I solod as a thief/fighter/mage I found myself falling back on web+composite bow and not even bothering to worry about much else. Once you get the paws of the cheetah (boots of haste) you're pretty much auto-win until you hit some higher level spell casters.
Yeah, I figured out as much. It's actually a good thing for me, since it adds some surprise factor to the game.
Next update is kind of long - longer than all previous ones joined together. I'll try to write and post it as soon as possible, but it might take some time.
Also, I am ripping of Paco's LP even more now - various details of deaths have been added to the initial post.
eklektyk
Erudite
Quite entertaining. keep Up Good Man!
anus_pounder
Arcane
Heres hoping Codex dies some more. :D
Hieromancer
Educated
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2009
- Messages
- 91
Well done so far. Keep it up. 
Quick question, are you going to be abusing the Basilisks for experience? Because a fighter/mage/thief has a pretty damn easy time with them, what with being able to cast protection from petrification on himself and then proceeding to kick their asses.
Anytime I play BG, I always find myself making a beeline straight there, especially if I'm soloing. Being cheap pays.
Quick question, are you going to be abusing the Basilisks for experience? Because a fighter/mage/thief has a pretty damn easy time with them, what with being able to cast protection from petrification on himself and then proceeding to kick their asses.
Anytime I play BG, I always find myself making a beeline straight there, especially if I'm soloing. Being cheap pays.
Zdzisiu said:
Yeah, me too. There's a limited number of jokes I can make of killing gibberlings.
Hieromancer said:
Probably not. There's only a certain amount of cheese I can endure and there will be much abuse going on anyway. Also, basilisks are not very entertaining enemies - either they one-shot kill You, or get slaughtered.
That said, I'll wipe the whole area clean if The Codex wanders in there somehow.
GarfunkeL
Racism Expert
Though I'd prefer busty wenches, Codex seems somehow quite endearing. Keep it up!
Update #4: The Monkey Shit Hits The Fan
Allright, it seems we've done all the chores. The Codex has access to a store and is ready to fetch the Manual of Bodily Health.
Yeah, about that. I don't really feel prepared to fighting sirines just yet. I mean, with the crappy armor and no magic stuff.
What do You suggest then?
I happen to know of an area, where I can get two items that would prove very useful. Let's do that first.
Whatever You say.
This is our next stop, meaning that The Codex has chosen a big, hairy, smelly ogre over half a dozen naked, slender, blue-skinned chicks.
Hey!
Ah, since I can't see it for myself. Could You tell me what's this update's title?
Why do You want to know?
Just a generic bad feeling.
I'm sure everything will be fine
The Codex' stats upon entrance. It looks like killing those spiders paid off and his fighter level will rise pretty soon.
Cave bear remains our most triumphant victory. Still no spells were used - I wonder how long we can keep this one up.
We move on.
Kobolds!
They're defeated, of course, but The Codex has to quaff a healing potion during the fight (no screenshot of that, unfortunately).
How about we go back and buy some more potions?
We just got here. We'll go back when You run out of them.
Enemy! Oh, it's just some gibberlings.
Oh shit. Oh shit.
Yeah! Who's the badass?
Of course, there are more...
...but a few well placed shots take care of them.
As expected, The Codex levels up.
Even more badass now!
Gaining a fighter level.
12 HP now. That should reduce the one-shot deaths by at least 10%.
Exa... Hey!
Not much changed here.
We encounter some bandits.
How's that possible. They weren't there 5 minutes ago.
Must have come hearing the sounds of fighting.
Bullshit.
They are easily picked out one at a time.
Ok, ok, let's hear it and be done.
Boom! Headshot!
One of the bandits manages to wound The Codex lightly.
But it's the last thing he does. Ever.
The last one.
Bandits drop a lot of stuff, especially compared to what we've killed so far. The Codex' inventory is not large enough to contain all of it.
I smell the sweet scent of money.
That might be something else smelling... Wait, are those scalps?
Looks like it, yes.
That's gross! Why did You scalp these guys for?
I did no such thing! The scalps were just lying there, beside them. Must've fallen of their heads, just like that.
Fallen. Of their heads. Uh-huh.
Maybe they're all wearing toupees?
You mean bandits only accept bald people into their ranks?
I was rather thinking in terms of occupational disease... And that's why they steal iron!
What? Why?
They probably think it's some kind of cure for baldness.
Bandits od the Sword Coast: stealing iron as a cure for baldness.
We briefly go back to High Hedge, to sell the loot, killing a skeleton on the way (I didn't bother to ss it). I forget to check whether Thalantyr sells healing potions (he does).
'Forget'. Yeah, right.
Back on track. After another quick 16-hour rest we move on.
Ah, yes, Elminster. Always in a hurry, so no one can exploit the hell out of the game and kill him.
Man, would that be awesome or what?
The highlighted dialogue is eerily similar to every codexer's opinion about... every other codexer. There's also a typo in it. Shame on You, Bioware!
I'm not scared of you, wolf.
Telling that to him or Yourself?
Just watch!
Off with it's head!
Wow, those additional 3 HP and 1 THAC0 really boosted Your confidence.
Shut up.
Hey, what's that?
Look, a ring! I wonder what it does.
You're not really thinking anyone buys that "accidental find" attitude?
Let's identify it. Incidentally, I have the needed spell right here.
Our first magic item. The ever-useful Ring of Protection.
The Codex' AC and saving throws with the ring equipped. There's still a lot of room for improvement.
Some more gibberlings.
They're no problem for The New And Improved Codex.
Fall before my might!
Mwahahahaha! Slaughter! I love when they splatter into ludicrous gibs.
Your charm knows no bounds.
Gibberlings!
Shock! I totally did not expect that.
The bow and me take care of them without a sweat.
Sucks to be them.
Gibberlings!
Not this time. These are smurfs... I mean xvarts. Although, there's not much difference.
They're what? Farts?
Oops... that's a lot of farts. Let's not fight them all at once.
The Codex retreats to the edge of the map. Two xvarts follow.
Make that three.
They are quickly cut down.
Fear the power of The Codex' sword!
We turn around to go back, but don't get far.
What? Where did those guys come from?
Respawning. We're probably saving the game too often.
How many gibberlings does it take to change a lightbulb?
What's a lightbulb?
Some monkey-ass slashing.
Never use that phrase again.
But wait, there's more!
Yaaawn... headshot.
Shh, don't even suggest boredom here, think about our viewability.
I hope the noble codexer audience is having great fun, because we certainly are!
Going back, picking out the xvarts that got lost along the way when chasing us earlier.
These things must have really short attention spans. Or maybe, they're suffering from that condition the guy from Memento had.
You know what Memento is, but a lightbulb doesn't ring a bell?
I'm not sure what you're trying to say.
Forget it.
Not these guys again. Are we still saving the game every ten seconds, or what?
Nope. Probably too often anyway.
At this rate, bow and me will run out of arrows sometime soon.
Wait. Did you hear the chime too?
The what?
The Codex levels up as a mage and as a thief.
Level up summary. Thieving skills will be increased according to the rules I explained in the previous update, at least for now.
Cave bear rests safely on top of the pile of bodies made by The Codex. It seems that identify doesn't count as a spell, so still no favourite one.
Let's test my newly acquired skills on those gibberlings!
Don't ask me what happened here. I honestly don't know. One moment we're fighting gibberlings like there's no tomorrow, next I see this screen. With 16 HP, The Codex wouldn't be one-shot by these guys. Two lucky 20's at a time?
Death count: 8
We reload.
I feel like I just woke up from some horrible nightmare. Killed by gibberlings. Still gives me the creeps when I think about it.
Yeah. Just a dream.
Am I still dreaming?
Let's hope you're not.
Shit. Four at a time? A challenge for the sword and me!
That's what I'm talking about!
One of the gibberlings drops a healing potion.
Don't 'forget' to pick it up.
I almost forgot we're still trailing back our xvart retreat route. We didn't make much progress recently.
In a geographical sense, maybe not. But we did make an important step on my way to ascension.
One xvart later, we suffer a terrible loss. The sword breaks.
NOOOOOOOOOO! THAT'S NOT TRUE! THAT"S IMPOSSIBLE!
This will seriously hinder our efforts. Thalantyr does not sell swords and no other stores are available just yet. Should have bought a spare back in Candlekeep.
WHY? WHY, SWORD? WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO LIKE THIS?
Are You finished?
Finished? SWORD WAS MY FRIEND, YOU INSENSITIVE BEAST! How am I supposed to slaughter stuff without it?
Indeed, that may prove to be a problem. We'll have to rely on the bow for now. We could head back to High Hedge and hope the game spawns us some flinds, but that may take forever and killing them without a sword wouldn't be easy, so I decide to stay.
Can we shoot these xvarts before they enter melee range?
Nope.
Damn farts!
Enemies enaged in melee with a ranged weapon get +4 to hit, while we get -4 to our rolls. This means the valid tactics is to retreat and shoot back.
So begins the happy tale of running around the woods and shooting little blue people. Thankfully, xvarts are almost impossible to miss and die from one shot.
I will refrain from commenting on the next few screenshots, providing a suitable soundtrack instead.
All is grand until we run into a larger group.
Maybe I should retreat a bit.
To add insult to injury, we meet some kobolds on the way.
Let's, uh, retreat some more.
After not running away from various coloured midgets like a total pussy, The Codex manages to hold some ground and the western edge of the map.
Desperate times call for desperate measures - we employ Perdue's sword as a weapon of last resort. The Codex' THAC0 sucks with it, but at least, enemies don't get their +4 bonus.
Yes! Die!
Two down! Wait, where did the third one go?
Coming right this way.
Dodge this!
We find another healing potion. We also take one of the xvart swords, since I'm not sure if Perdue's sword can break, and it would be a stupid way to lose a quest reward.
I totally rock the boat, even without the sword.
We return to killing xvarts that earlier forgot they were chasing The Codex.
Getting rid of them is a favor not only for the sword coast, but for intelligent thought everywhere.
I'm getting a slight feeling of deja vu.
Apparently some gibberling decided to join the party.
Boom! Headshot!
Ok, make that a bajillion of gibberlings.
I would really like to still have my sword right now.
Yeah, it wouldn't hurt.
Death count: 9
Reloading.
Maybe if I tread carefully, I won't attract them all at once. First, shoot this kobold.
Two gibberlings on twelve!
Thank you for your valuable observation.
Oh, look. Another kobold.
Quite the timing he has, little bastard.
Stabbed!
Second one down.
You're doing surprisingly good.
Your turn, party crasher!
Finishing up latest spawn of gibberlings.
Sneak attack!
That wasn't a real sneak attack.
Yeah, I was tired of waiting to say that, since we're not doing any stealth.
That's because You suck at stealth.
Back on track.
These kobolds are actually life savers, since they provide us a supply of arrows. We could buy them in High Hedge, but Thalantyr only sells magical ones, which are quite expensive.
Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me.
I hope You didn't grew too attached to Your ass, because this is the time to say goodbye to it.
We'll see about that!
We try shoot'n'run tactics, but the wolf is too fast.
Dread wolf is hard to hit with the zero-profficiency short sword, so we blast it a few times with wand of magic missile. The Codex is bitten back, but the healing potion keeps him alive.
So far so good!
After two more missiles and a lucky stab, dread wolf falls dead!
Who's the bitch now!?
After another quick, 80-hour rest we move on in hope of maybe reaching the ogre this time.
Surprise, surprise. Gibberlings. This time the diseased version.
We're in no mood for jokes, so they all soon lie dead at The Codex' feet.
I'm starting to lose my patience here. I swear to everything sacred, if I EVER see another gibberling in my life, I'm going to fucking KILL IT DEAD!
How would that be different from what You're already doing?
Didn't I tell you to go and hang yourself at some point? Why are you still here?
Fucking fuck! I honestly don't know which are more annoying, gibberlings or those fart things.
Let me help You decide with a quote: 'Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!'.
Ok, it's certain now. These things need to die.
It's a tough fight. We win, but at the cost of two healing potions and are forced to employ retreat tactics. It works, as usual, but makes us lose some ground yet again.
Don't save the game! Don't give those fuckers any excuse to respawn.
I'm not saving the game. Well, ok, I did after the dread wolf, but other than that - no.
You're not? We will lose all the progress if we run into another dread wolf!
What do You want me to do, then?
Maybe we can take another shot at stealth.
Hide in Shadows kicks in at first try. A good sign.
We waste one xvart before it's even aware of our presence.
The Codex' skills fail exactly at a moment of entering some xvarts' sight range.
It does not end well.
Yeah, should have been saving the game after all.
Death count: 10
Reloading.
Looking at the bright side: at least we have a healing potion back. Not sure what happened to the other one (backpack, maybe?).
I'm inclined to return to running around highly visible but in armour, instead of naked and still visible.
Another dread wolf awaits us three steps from the last save point.
We repeat previous tactics, and it's succesful again, although The Codex has to use the potion.
Is now a good time to go back and resupply?
Stop whining.
Guess what? More gibberlings. I guess by dying, we gave them an excuse to respawn.
5 arrows later, there are no more gibberlings. Nice going.
The bow's patience has run out. Mine too.
Fog of war! We're reaching unexplored part of the area!
Don't miss the xvarts.
Oh, don't worry about that.
Here's your sword back!
The ogre should be around here somewhere.
And indeed, he is.
Ok. What's the plan?
Plan? You wanted to come here. I thought You had a plan of Your own.
Are you fucking kidding me? I'm hurt, with no healing potions and no sword. Even no fucking magic missile wand!
Let's hope You're faster than him, then.
It turns out the ogre is equally fast to The Codex, which is not what I remembered. This means we're a little fucked.
We still try shoot'n'run. It works, but just barely.
We have to cover a lot of ground to get an oppurtunity for a shot, and The Codex doesn't hit every time.
YOU try shooting while running away from 10 foot tall brute! We'll how that goes.
Now, now. You're doing fine. Keep runnin'.
I'll wipe that smirk off your face someday!
We reach our final stand location, and the ogre shows no will to die just yet. The Codex is force to pass him and run the other way.
I so wish I had a few ranks in tumble right now!
While still chased by the ogre, we run into this clusterfuck gibberling orgy.
I am so going to die in a moment.
Actually, no! Due to some clever manuevering and a lot of luck we are able to run away.
TRAIN TO ZONE!
We lose most of the pursuit on the way, including the ogre. Once again, The Codex ends up defending at the western border.
YES!
The bad news is, we're back to square one and have to stab through the whole area again.
And the enemies have respawned, EVEN THOUGH WE DIDN'T EVEN SAVE THE FUCKING GAME!
Calm down, you're losing it.
DAMN RIGHT I AM!
At least killing the bandits nets us some loot, of which arrows are not least important.
We start backtracking the breadcrumb gibberling trail, picking them out as they appear, one by one.
The other healing potion turned out to be in the backpack after all. Not all is lost!
How many gibberlings are there on the Sword Coast anyway? It feels like I've killed about a million of them already.
There's always more.
And all the empty spaces between gibberlings are filled by xvarts. The nature hates imbalance after all!
Fuck! No! I refuse to be killed by xvarts! There must some a border drawn somewhere!
The Codex drinks a healing potion and an oil of speed. The remaining xvarts are killed.
Quicktheogre! Let'shurrybeforetheaccelarationwearsoff!
What? Slow down.
Notime! Theritis!
Yesdie!
Before I manage to save the game, five steps to the south a bunch of xvarts appear. They weren't there 30 seconds ago. And I repeat - game was not saved. What. The. Fuck.
Luckily, The Hyperactive Codex manages to dispatch them without a scratch (sorry for lack of screenshots).
Let's prepare some spells and rest.
This should prove useful against sirines' arrows.
Do You still think coming here was the right idea?
If you'd asked me fifteen minutes ago, I would've said no. But right now: HELL YES!
Damn munchkin.
We've got what we've came for, but part of the area is still unexplored.
That of course means more gibberlings.
Sparing everyone the details, they all die.
Wow. A wolf. I thought gibberlings and farts have eaten them all.
I think they're more beef-types. Xvarts, at least.
Maybe I could eat it then?
What? Why? You don't have to eat at all.
I don't?
Sure. This is Baldur's Gate, not some Ultima or Might & Magic.
You mean, I don't have to eat, because I'm mighty, magical and ultimate?
What? No... Okay, yes. That's what I meant. Whatever, let's move on.
Please, no. Not gibberlings AGAIN.
At least they are easy to kill.
Oops, one step too far.
How IN HELL did that happen?
Death count: 11
We reload.
Chased by gibberlings, we decide to use a chokepoint to our advantage.
It seems to be working...
...for a time.
It's ok. As long as I fight one or two at a time, it should be fine.
Death count: 12
Reloading.
Ok, seriously, man. Could You please stop getting killed by gibberlings. It's rather embarassing.
I want my sword back.
We begin our third approach to the pack. If this one fails too, we'll prepare sleep spell and slaughter them while they lie unconscious.
The pack is placed a little unfavorably for us - attacking in a wave, soon after eye contact has been made.
After this kill, we start retreating.
And not a moment too soon!
They die, one by one.
Of course, there's always more.
Our replacement sword breaks.
Good riddance!
Except that You're defenseless now.
Not much of a change, really.
Fortunately, there are plenty of spare swords lying around.
Xvarts. We've all started to miss them, haven't we?
xvarts -> dead xvarts: conversion complete!
One of them dropped a potentially very useful spell scroll!
Basilisks, here I come!
Not just yet.
A couple of xvarts. We experience some unlucky rolls when shooting them and The Codex is forced to retreat.
It ends badly.
Oh, for fuck's sake!
Death count: 13
Reloading the game.
Did I just got killed by a fart?
No idea, actually. Either that, or gibberlings again.
Don't really know which one would be worse.
Luckily I saved right before the xvart encounter.
I'm not moving from this fucking spot this time!
Yes! Dammit! Eat shit, blue cockfucker!
I'm hoping this was the last encounter here.
Let me rephrase my previous statement:
A quick quiz: how many gibberlings do You have to kill to level up?
I don't know. How many?
That many.
Oh yeah!
We talk to this guy before leveling (don't ask why, I don't know either). He warns us about gibberlings being present in the area.
NO FUCKING SHIT THEY'RE PRESENT IN THE AREA! I WOULD NEVER HAVE GUESSED THERE ARE GIBBERLINGS IN THIS AREA.
After The Codex calms down, he levels up as a fighter.
Level up summary. The new weapon proficiency point lands in two-handed weapons style.
Sorry, dread wolves, cave bear was here first. The total number of kills rised by 99 since the previous level up.
That's 60 gibberlings, 30 farts, an ogre, two dread wolves, one regular wolf and a few bandits.
You forgot some kobolds, I think.
Hard to believe, but the first thing to do here after the level up is killing some gibberlings.
Don't even get me started...
It's also the last thing to do in this area.
Area completed!
Ok, here's the new plan: let's leave and never come back here again. N.E.V.E.R.
Where do You want to go?
How about wherever they sell swords I actually can use?
Ok. I might have a suggestion.
--------------------------------------------
Next time: a breather episode.
Does that mean I won't die?
You wish.
What do You suggest then?
Whatever You say.
This is our next stop, meaning that The Codex has chosen a big, hairy, smelly ogre over half a dozen naked, slender, blue-skinned chicks.
Why do You want to know?
I'm sure everything will be fine
The Codex' stats upon entrance. It looks like killing those spiders paid off and his fighter level will rise pretty soon.
Cave bear remains our most triumphant victory. Still no spells were used - I wonder how long we can keep this one up.
We move on.
They're defeated, of course, but The Codex has to quaff a healing potion during the fight (no screenshot of that, unfortunately).
We just got here. We'll go back when You run out of them.
Of course, there are more...
...but a few well placed shots take care of them.
As expected, The Codex levels up.
Gaining a fighter level.
12 HP now. That should reduce the one-shot deaths by at least 10%.
Not much changed here.
We encounter some bandits.
Must have come hearing the sounds of fighting.
They are easily picked out one at a time.
Ok, ok, let's hear it and be done.
One of the bandits manages to wound The Codex lightly.
The last one.
Bandits drop a lot of stuff, especially compared to what we've killed so far. The Codex' inventory is not large enough to contain all of it.
That might be something else smelling... Wait, are those scalps?
That's gross! Why did You scalp these guys for?
Fallen. Of their heads. Uh-huh.
You mean bandits only accept bald people into their ranks?
What? Why?
Bandits od the Sword Coast: stealing iron as a cure for baldness.
We briefly go back to High Hedge, to sell the loot, killing a skeleton on the way (I didn't bother to ss it). I forget to check whether Thalantyr sells healing potions (he does).
Back on track. After another quick 16-hour rest we move on.
Ah, yes, Elminster. Always in a hurry, so no one can exploit the hell out of the game and kill him.
The highlighted dialogue is eerily similar to every codexer's opinion about... every other codexer. There's also a typo in it. Shame on You, Bioware!
Telling that to him or Yourself?
Wow, those additional 3 HP and 1 THAC0 really boosted Your confidence.
You're not really thinking anyone buys that "accidental find" attitude?
Our first magic item. The ever-useful Ring of Protection.
The Codex' AC and saving throws with the ring equipped. There's still a lot of room for improvement.
Some more gibberlings.
They're no problem for The New And Improved Codex.
Your charm knows no bounds.
Shock! I totally did not expect that.
Not this time. These are smurfs... I mean xvarts. Although, there's not much difference.
The Codex retreats to the edge of the map. Two xvarts follow.
Make that three.
They are quickly cut down.
We turn around to go back, but don't get far.
Respawning. We're probably saving the game too often.
How many gibberlings does it take to change a lightbulb?
Some monkey-ass slashing.
But wait, there's more!
Shh, don't even suggest boredom here, think about our viewability.
I hope the noble codexer audience is having great fun, because we certainly are!
Going back, picking out the xvarts that got lost along the way when chasing us earlier.
You know what Memento is, but a lightbulb doesn't ring a bell?
Forget it.
Nope. Probably too often anyway.
Wait. Did you hear the chime too?
The Codex levels up as a mage and as a thief.
Level up summary. Thieving skills will be increased according to the rules I explained in the previous update, at least for now.
Cave bear rests safely on top of the pile of bodies made by The Codex. It seems that identify doesn't count as a spell, so still no favourite one.
Don't ask me what happened here. I honestly don't know. One moment we're fighting gibberlings like there's no tomorrow, next I see this screen. With 16 HP, The Codex wouldn't be one-shot by these guys. Two lucky 20's at a time?
Death count: 8
We reload.
Yeah. Just a dream.
Let's hope you're not.
One of the gibberlings drops a healing potion.
I almost forgot we're still trailing back our xvart retreat route. We didn't make much progress recently.
One xvart later, we suffer a terrible loss. The sword breaks.
This will seriously hinder our efforts. Thalantyr does not sell swords and no other stores are available just yet. Should have bought a spare back in Candlekeep.
Are You finished?
Indeed, that may prove to be a problem. We'll have to rely on the bow for now. We could head back to High Hedge and hope the game spawns us some flinds, but that may take forever and killing them without a sword wouldn't be easy, so I decide to stay.
Can we shoot these xvarts before they enter melee range?
Nope.
Enemies enaged in melee with a ranged weapon get +4 to hit, while we get -4 to our rolls. This means the valid tactics is to retreat and shoot back.
So begins the happy tale of running around the woods and shooting little blue people. Thankfully, xvarts are almost impossible to miss and die from one shot.
I will refrain from commenting on the next few screenshots, providing a suitable soundtrack instead.
All is grand until we run into a larger group.
To add insult to injury, we meet some kobolds on the way.
After not running away from various coloured midgets like a total pussy, The Codex manages to hold some ground and the western edge of the map.
Desperate times call for desperate measures - we employ Perdue's sword as a weapon of last resort. The Codex' THAC0 sucks with it, but at least, enemies don't get their +4 bonus.
Coming right this way.
We find another healing potion. We also take one of the xvart swords, since I'm not sure if Perdue's sword can break, and it would be a stupid way to lose a quest reward.
We return to killing xvarts that earlier forgot they were chasing The Codex.
Apparently some gibberling decided to join the party.
Ok, make that a bajillion of gibberlings.
Yeah, it wouldn't hurt.
Death count: 9
Reloading.
Two gibberlings on twelve!
Oh, look. Another kobold.
You're doing surprisingly good.
Finishing up latest spawn of gibberlings.
That wasn't a real sneak attack.
That's because You suck at stealth.
Back on track.
These kobolds are actually life savers, since they provide us a supply of arrows. We could buy them in High Hedge, but Thalantyr only sells magical ones, which are quite expensive.
I hope You didn't grew too attached to Your ass, because this is the time to say goodbye to it.
We try shoot'n'run tactics, but the wolf is too fast.
Dread wolf is hard to hit with the zero-profficiency short sword, so we blast it a few times with wand of magic missile. The Codex is bitten back, but the healing potion keeps him alive.
After two more missiles and a lucky stab, dread wolf falls dead!
After another quick, 80-hour rest we move on in hope of maybe reaching the ogre this time.
Surprise, surprise. Gibberlings. This time the diseased version.
We're in no mood for jokes, so they all soon lie dead at The Codex' feet.
How would that be different from what You're already doing?
Let me help You decide with a quote: 'Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!'.
It's a tough fight. We win, but at the cost of two healing potions and are forced to employ retreat tactics. It works, as usual, but makes us lose some ground yet again.
I'm not saving the game. Well, ok, I did after the dread wolf, but other than that - no.
What do You want me to do, then?
Hide in Shadows kicks in at first try. A good sign.
We waste one xvart before it's even aware of our presence.
The Codex' skills fail exactly at a moment of entering some xvarts' sight range.
It does not end well.
Yeah, should have been saving the game after all.
Death count: 10
Reloading.
Looking at the bright side: at least we have a healing potion back. Not sure what happened to the other one (backpack, maybe?).
Another dread wolf awaits us three steps from the last save point.
We repeat previous tactics, and it's succesful again, although The Codex has to use the potion.
Stop whining.
Guess what? More gibberlings. I guess by dying, we gave them an excuse to respawn.
5 arrows later, there are no more gibberlings. Nice going.
Don't miss the xvarts.
The ogre should be around here somewhere.
And indeed, he is.
Plan? You wanted to come here. I thought You had a plan of Your own.
Let's hope You're faster than him, then.
It turns out the ogre is equally fast to The Codex, which is not what I remembered. This means we're a little fucked.
We still try shoot'n'run. It works, but just barely.
We have to cover a lot of ground to get an oppurtunity for a shot, and The Codex doesn't hit every time.
Now, now. You're doing fine. Keep runnin'.
We reach our final stand location, and the ogre shows no will to die just yet. The Codex is force to pass him and run the other way.
While still chased by the ogre, we run into this clusterfuck gibberling orgy.
Actually, no! Due to some clever manuevering and a lot of luck we are able to run away.
We lose most of the pursuit on the way, including the ogre. Once again, The Codex ends up defending at the western border.
The bad news is, we're back to square one and have to stab through the whole area again.
And the enemies have respawned, EVEN THOUGH WE DIDN'T EVEN SAVE THE FUCKING GAME!
DAMN RIGHT I AM!
At least killing the bandits nets us some loot, of which arrows are not least important.
We start backtracking the breadcrumb gibberling trail, picking them out as they appear, one by one.
The other healing potion turned out to be in the backpack after all. Not all is lost!
There's always more.
And all the empty spaces between gibberlings are filled by xvarts. The nature hates imbalance after all!
The Codex drinks a healing potion and an oil of speed. The remaining xvarts are killed.
What? Slow down.
Before I manage to save the game, five steps to the south a bunch of xvarts appear. They weren't there 30 seconds ago. And I repeat - game was not saved. What. The. Fuck.
Luckily, The Hyperactive Codex manages to dispatch them without a scratch (sorry for lack of screenshots).
Do You still think coming here was the right idea?
Damn munchkin.
We've got what we've came for, but part of the area is still unexplored.
That of course means more gibberlings.
Sparing everyone the details, they all die.
I think they're more beef-types. Xvarts, at least.
What? Why? You don't have to eat at all.
Sure. This is Baldur's Gate, not some Ultima or Might & Magic.
What? No... Okay, yes. That's what I meant. Whatever, let's move on.
Please, no. Not gibberlings AGAIN.
How IN HELL did that happen?
Death count: 11
We reload.
Chased by gibberlings, we decide to use a chokepoint to our advantage.
It seems to be working...
...for a time.
Death count: 12
Reloading.
Ok, seriously, man. Could You please stop getting killed by gibberlings. It's rather embarassing.
We begin our third approach to the pack. If this one fails too, we'll prepare sleep spell and slaughter them while they lie unconscious.
The pack is placed a little unfavorably for us - attacking in a wave, soon after eye contact has been made.
After this kill, we start retreating.
They die, one by one.
Of course, there's always more.
Our replacement sword breaks.
Except that You're defenseless now.
Fortunately, there are plenty of spare swords lying around.
Xvarts. We've all started to miss them, haven't we?
xvarts -> dead xvarts: conversion complete!
One of them dropped a potentially very useful spell scroll!
Not just yet.
A couple of xvarts. We experience some unlucky rolls when shooting them and The Codex is forced to retreat.
It ends badly.
Death count: 13
Reloading the game.
No idea, actually. Either that, or gibberlings again.
Luckily I saved right before the xvart encounter.
I'm hoping this was the last encounter here.
Let me rephrase my previous statement:
A quick quiz: how many gibberlings do You have to kill to level up?
That many.
We talk to this guy before leveling (don't ask why, I don't know either). He warns us about gibberlings being present in the area.
After The Codex calms down, he levels up as a fighter.
Level up summary. The new weapon proficiency point lands in two-handed weapons style.
Sorry, dread wolves, cave bear was here first. The total number of kills rised by 99 since the previous level up.
You forgot some kobolds, I think.
Hard to believe, but the first thing to do here after the level up is killing some gibberlings.
It's also the last thing to do in this area.
Area completed!
Where do You want to go?
Ok. I might have a suggestion.
--------------------------------------------
Next time: a breather episode.
You wish.
Last edited:
taplonaplo
Scholar
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2008
- Messages
- 628
I don't know which is worse. Basic Tutu spawn with the ridiculous respawn rates, or BGSpawn mod with it's scaling shit. Altho 2 vampiric wolf lords that cast fear every other round and dispel magic and also summon some adds, one of which could oneshot any of my char with it's stupid high fire damage certainly explained why the common folk talk about how dangerous the roads are.
Hieromancer
Educated
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2009
- Messages
- 91
Oh Lord, you have patience far beyond mine. Keep it up, this is a really entertaining read.
Another question, by the way, will either Drizzt and/or Shandalar survive the end of the game?
Another question, by the way, will either Drizzt and/or Shandalar survive the end of the game?
taplonaplo
Scholar
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2008
- Messages
- 628
is there actually a way to defeat shandalar without cheap shots like wad of paralyze?Hieromancer said:
Yeesh
Magister
Awesome.
Hieromancer
Educated
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2009
- Messages
- 91
Malakal said:
My thoughts exactly. I'm a connoisseur of being a cheap bastard in the BG games, but freezing someone, even someone very powerful, by using an item exactly as it's meant to be used doesn't really seem all that cheap. Yes, Shandalar clearly wasn't intended to be killable what with his -20 AC and everything, but the method itself doesn't seem very off.
taplonaplo
Scholar
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2008
- Messages
- 628
Why not just ctrl y it then? Saves you the trouble of reloading till you get that 1 on his saving roll, and the battle plays out pretty much the same anyway.
If you webspam him while engaged it's clean. If you reload till you get your paralyzation rod to hit him before he's hostile, you are cheap shotting it.
If you webspam him while engaged it's clean. If you reload till you get your paralyzation rod to hit him before he's hostile, you are cheap shotting it.
Hieromancer
Educated
- Joined
- Aug 29, 2009
- Messages
- 91
taplonaplo said:
Funny thing is, he actually doesn't turn hostile if you attempt to paralyze him with the rod, so you can shoot him as many times as you want until it sticks. Killing him on iron man is very doable, and I've done it before.
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