Baldur's Gate Baldur's Gate 3 Early Access Thread [GAME RELEASED, GO TO NEW THREAD]

[KIss My Ass]

Having a moderator warn him to stop spamming multiple times seems to have scared him off temporarily

Oh how convenient. It would have been cool if one of the staff members took two seconds out of their day to do the same thing in the countless RE threads he destroyed.

How do you destroy a thread? Are you aware that you can ignore people? What is this nonsense?

You have no idea how relentless this fruitcake is.

 

[Steezus]

I am turning a new leaf. I love Larian now.

Good. I'm glad you finally love Larian and hate stupid, useless Radiant AI bullshit that's mainly meant to confuse autists into thinking they're finally making friends.

Yeah, Sims 2 isn't that great, guys.

 

[AwesomeButton]

And what would be a good rp excuse to fuck all dem bitches.

You are the paladin of the Righteous Cock - fucking bitches absolves them of previous adultery.

 

[La vie sexuelle]

I like Shadowheart

She is carefully tailored by psychologist in Larian to draw attention from heterosexual men, just like Astarion is tailored to draw attention from crazy women. Halsin is obviously gay fantasy (there is gay subculture called "bears"). Gale is fantasy for more normal women and Minthara romance is about calming rowdy beast. Lae'zel is about being dominated and Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Singing to Shadowheart by the campfire after a long day of fighting bad guys....

Writing a ballad about Shadowheart's heroic deeds saving Baldur's Gate from the dastardly cult of the absolute...

Embarking on Shadowheart's quest to discover her memories, and then making new ones, together....

Cuddling with Shadowheart and suddenly she whispers to you her real name....

Shadowheart running her fingers through your hair as you sit and watch the stars together, then she says she's happy that she can finally appreciate the moon now that she has escaped from Shar's deceptions...

Using your reaction to jump in front of an arrow that met or exceeded her armor class....

Getting Loviatar's blessing from the priest in the fort and Shadowheart liked watching that so she tells you that you need to do it again every night in order to keep the blessing, and that she happily volunteers to help you....

Using your adventuring money to buy the nicest wine in Baldur's Gate for your date at the lake with Shadowheart....but then reminding her that it's dangerous to drink and swim because you love her and care about her safety more than you value looking cool....

Using detect thoughts to find out what Shadowheart's favorite camp meal is, and then always collecting those camp supplies....no, that's an invasion of privacy, I will never use magic or tadpoles to look at Shadowheart's mind, I'll just ask her normally....

Taking proficiency and then expertise in chef's tools at character creation so you can always make the yummiest meals for your wife Shadowheart....

Stuffing your bear cock in her shadow plane dimensional door.

Halsin isn't Origin character, but you can play as Shadowheart...

 

[Silverfish]

Cuddling with Shadowheart and suddenly she whispers to you her real name....

"My real name is Shadowheart... Fromthenewworld."

 

[La vie sexuelle]

Cuddling with Shadowheart and suddenly she whispers to you her real name....

"My real name is Shadowheart... Fromthenewworld."

"My real name is Jeniffer Alice Cobblestone-Watson III. Deal with it, romantic partner"

blessed king of longing:
Singing to Shadowheart by the campfire after a long day of fighting bad guys....

Writing a ballad about Shadowheart's heroic deeds saving Baldur's Gate from the dastardly cult of the absolute...

Embarking on Shadowheart's quest to discover her memories, and then making new ones, together....

Cuddling with Shadowheart and suddenly she whispers to you her real name....

Shadowheart running her fingers through your hair as you sit and watch the stars together, then she says she's happy that she can finally appreciate the moon now that she has escaped from Shar's deceptions...

Using your reaction to jump in front of an arrow that met or exceeded her armor class....

Getting Loviatar's blessing from the priest in the fort and Shadowheart liked watching that so she tells you that you need to do it again every night in order to keep the blessing, and that she happily volunteers to help you....

Using your adventuring money to buy the nicest wine in Baldur's Gate for your date at the lake with Shadowheart....but then reminding her that it's dangerous to drink and swim because you love her and care about her safety more than you value looking cool....

Using detect thoughts to find out what Shadowheart's favorite camp meal is, and then always collecting those camp supplies....no, that's an invasion of privacy, I will never use magic or tadpoles to look at Shadowheart's mind, I'll just ask her normally....

Taking proficiency and then expertise in chef's tools at character creation so you can always make the yummiest meals for your wife Shadowheart....

BTW, what happened to this 4chan thread?

 

[Silverfish]

"My real name is Jeniffer Alice Cobblestone-Watson III. Deal with it, romantic partner"

Larian could always reference their own work and make her true name Madame Josephine Gribbles De Peeb.

 

[Infinitron]

Infiltration successful:



Smejki

 

[La vie sexuelle]

Infiltration successful:



Smejki

Jan Smejkal:

Penis-haver

Yes, he is our guy.

 

[Reinhardt]

are we there yet?

 

[Kiste]

Then where tf is he?

 

[Aphex81]

 

[La vie sexuelle]

Why Tav is so happy? He likes to watch?

 

[blessed king of longing]

smooching the mole on Shadowcutes butt

 

[Larianshill]

Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Nobody knows, that's why he got a rewrite and a new voice actor.

 

[Barbarian]

Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Nobody knows, that's why he got a rewrite and a new voice actor.

He was mandatory diversity piece. Imagine not having a single non-white companion - the you know who would go raving mad.

Wasn't popular the way he was designed - apparently is being re-written as a blade like chad monster hunter.

 

[Barbarian]

I like Shadowheart

She is carefully tailored by psychologist in Larian to draw attention from heterosexual men, just like Astarion is tailored to draw attention from crazy women. Halsin is obviously gay fantasy (there is gay subculture called "bears"). Gale is fantasy for more normal women and Minthara romance is about calming rowdy beast. Lae'zel is about being dominated and Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Don't forget Karlach. For the buff girl fetishists.

 

[Reinhardt]

I like Shadowheart

She is carefully tailored by psychologist in Larian to draw attention from heterosexual men, just like Astarion is tailored to draw attention from crazy women. Halsin is obviously gay fantasy (there is gay subculture called "bears"). Gale is fantasy for more normal women and Minthara romance is about calming rowdy beast. Lae'zel is about being dominated and Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Don't forget Karlach. For the buff girl fetishists.

girl?

 

[Fedora Master]

Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Nobody knows, that's why he got a rewrite and a new voice actor.

ESG score

 

[Kiste]

Don't forget Karlach. For the buff girl fetishists.

I could never forget Mommy Karlach.

 

[La vie sexuelle]

Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Nobody knows, that's why he got a rewrite and a new voice actor.

Ah, yes, they added sex-cult to his plot.

I like Shadowheart

She is carefully tailored by psychologist in Larian to draw attention from heterosexual men, just like Astarion is tailored to draw attention from crazy women. Halsin is obviously gay fantasy (there is gay subculture called "bears"). Gale is fantasy for more normal women and Minthara romance is about calming rowdy beast. Lae'zel is about being dominated and Wyll...what is the point of Wyll?

Don't forget Karlach. For the buff girl fetishists.

No. She is for weebs. Colorful? Check. Shows a lot of skin? Check. Has "secretly dangerous power"? Check. Tights? Check. She is sweet virgin looking for good boyfriend desu? Check.

 

[blessed king of longing]

ALLAH AKBAR !!!

 

[d1r]

Five more days!!!

 

[Larianshill]

Five more days...

 

[Barbarian]

Are ndas still in place? Where is muh durge spoilers at.