A pale sliver of blue-spectrum light wavered upon Andrzej's coffee mug like a DLSS-stricken raytracing artifact. It was late, so late at CDPR that he was the last man standing. The others? Long gone, crawled back to their own homes and beds, an oh-so-brief reprieve from the grind of getting Cyberpunk 2077 to the elusive finish line. But not Andrzej. He had recently failed to deliver on the new and improved police AI, and now he was eager to make a show of his commitment by means of burning the midnight oil.
And yet... the work was so dull. Line after line of faint letters upon a luminescent background, swimming before his eyes in alien patterns, swirling within his mind as they caught form and shape unnatural. Here was a Kaer Codeblock, there was a many-headed switch() dragon... Andrzej slapped himself! He had to get all that fantasy crap out of his head! This wasn't The Witcher, he needed to get into
the zone, to
resonate with the spirit of what they were making... But he was so tired... Release, that's what he needed! Something to snap his mind out of that tunnel vision.
Why not? After all, there was no one around... And the computer was right there, in front of him... Andrzej minimized his IDE and got to it. Soon, he lost himself in it completely. Yeah, okay, it wasn't exactly quality shit, but any port in a storm and all that. And time flew away from him.
"What the fuck are you doing?"
The sudden question hit Andrzej like a ton of bricks and that soft tone might as well have been divine judgement. He swiveled his office chair around and came face to face with none other than Marcin Iwiński.
"Uh... Err... I was, uh, you know..."
"Are you playing Mass Effect?"
"What?! No! No, absolutely not!"
"That's Mass Effect. On your screen."
"Well... Yes..."
"And you're playing it."
"No! No, I'm, uh...
researching! Yes, that's it, I am doing
research for Cyberpunk 2077!"
"Right..." Suddenly, Marcin's brow contorted and his gaze became enraptured with...
something that was there, on his employee's screen. The executive slowly leaned in to get a better look. "Andrzej," he clapped the quivering programmer's shoulder, "you are a genius!"
"I am?"
"Yes! This is
exactly what we need in our game!"
Tentatively emboldened but still fearful of scaring his good fortune away, Andrzej glanced back to the monitor for the instrument of his salvation. He saw none, so he took a long while before venturing a guess.
"You mean... FemShep's ass?"
"No, you idiot, not that! This!
Slow-ass fucking elevators!"