Both could be of interest if they were made realistically
How would you do both realistically? Genuinely curious.
This is true, but also... it kind of ignores the fact that the point of fiction is often not to replicate reality. It's to entertain. You may personally disagree, but most people are actually not looking for maximally realistic events in fiction. The way people speak in a book or even a movie is totally different from how they speak in real life, etc. It's an influence, not the gestalt.
I don't disagree at all, fiction is fiction. By "realistic" I mean writing in a way that sustains suspension of disbelief.
"Realistic" always has a hidden meaning when applied to writing characters, including romances. Can you imagine the amount of sappy and cringy stuff that happens when people irl are romancing? Real life has everything, and it is likely that no matter how you'll write your lines, whether they'll be innocent or super horny or whatever else, someone has probably uttered them in a real situation. I knew a person who actually experienced things that, when put in a visual novel, would likely be criticized as 'fanservice' or 'unattainable fantasy'.
Whenever I encounter calls for more 'realistic' character writing, I interpret them as demands for characters that are more
average. Quite often I am correct in this. "These things happened" - "Oh, but they dont sound real!" - "Well, they are not
average". In a field of made-up stories such calls are illegitimate. Sometimes these are poorly expressed demands of greater
character depth. That is okay, but that's also something different. Life is full of extraordinary people and turns of events that come out of nowhere, enough to make an endless amount of novels. I'll only stick to average if a genre or a project demands it, and then it is simply in order to do something interesting with a trope, rather than because there is some inherent value in such "realism".
To sustain suspension of disbelief - is coherence rather than realism. Romances need a lot of this, they need to make sense on the terms which the author introduces, and somehow fit the general tone of the game.