Can't deny that
Lhynn, but i'm a poor nerd wi a big mortgage and a bad divorce. Or to put it another way:
Two blokes down local boozer, Bert and Bob.
Bert says, "Look at my new dog Bob, smartest dog on fucking planet, can talk, count and do owt yer want."
"Bollocks!" Says Bob.
"Actually (and please do excuse me for interrupting) my new master is quite correct Sir, I am genetically engineered to be not only mans best friend but also a worthy conversationalist and useful member of the family." Says the dog.
Bert elbows Bob and says, "I told thee."
So the two blokes give the dog their betting slips and tell it to pop down bookies and lay £50 each down on 3:30 at Kempton.
Hours pass and the dog doesn't return, worried Bert and Bob set out looking for the wonderdog, he's not at bookies, not at park and finally they by chance see him down an alley banging away at a sweet little blond whore.
Bert shouts out, "Dog tha's never done that before!"
Dog shouts back, "Ha, i've never had money before!"